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Segunda-feira, 24 / 06 / 19

How to Overcome Inferiority Complex with 7 Methods That Work ~ Sherrie.

How to Overcome Inferiority Complex with 7 Methods That Work.

By Sherrie.

June 23rd, 2019

 

Confidence equals good mental health, and that’s why learning to overcome the inferiority complex is so important.
Having an inferiority complex means you never really feel good about yourself. In fact, most other people in your life seem greater, more intelligent or more talented. Others may also seem beautiful as opposed to your ugliness.
Do these descriptions ring a bell? Well, learning to overcome the inferiority complex is the key to a better life. No one should feel less than anyone else.

Methods to help you change your mindset and overcome inferiority complex

 
Understanding how to overcome the feelings associated with inferiority complex should be your focus. In order to change your mindset, you have to know exactly what you’re facing.
The inferiority complex is not just feeling bad about yourself temporarily, it’s a feeling that persists from day to day – they’re negative feelings you’ve accepted about yourself.

There are methods, however, that help you get rid of these feelings over time:

1. Pinpoint one source

The truth is, you may feel inferior to many people. That’s the horrible nature of the inferiority complex. The good news is, you can focus on one person to help you pinpoint where your weaknesses are. For instance, choose a so-called “superior person”, and ask yourself one question: “Why do I feel inferior to this person?”
Analyzing the one person you picked will help you build levels of confidence. Say you feel that the person is more attractive than you, more intelligent, and more sociable. Well, you can start by finding one thing you can do that they cannot.
There are things, trust me, because no one is perfect. In fact, there may be many things you can do better, but you’ve just focused on your inferior state as opposed to their seemingly perfected one. Do you see? Try this one out as soon as possible. You may be surprised.

2. Positive self-talk

Most of the time, we can learn a great deal about how to get over feeling inferior just by talking good to ourselves. Be honest, how many times have you said, “I’m ugly”“I’m not good enough”, or “I wish I was more like someone else?” Well, I’m sure we’ve all fallen prey to these thoughts from time to time.
The key here is to practice countering these negative thoughts with positive ones. For each negative talk we have with ourselves, we should strive to have two positive ones.
Over time, you will notice a great change in your confidence level. And if someone happens to insult you, you will be armed and ready to defend your self-esteem.

3. Find the root

Of course, if you want to know how to destroy the inferiority complex, you must remember where it came from. Maybe you have no idea how the negative self-talk and feelings even surfaced. Well, if you experienced rejection or trauma in your early life, inferiority feelings may be deep-rooted and will have to be pulled out and examined.
You can start analyzing yourself or you can seek professional help in this area. Some roots, I must admit, travel deep within your mind.
Some of these roots go far and some are large, meaning they encompass multiple issues, situations and people from your past. This is where untangling roots also come into play. To heal your confidence, you must discover these roots.

4. Gravitate toward positive people

Another way to overcome feelings of inferiority is to surround yourself with as many positive people as possible. Being around positive people remind you of how you’re supposed to treat yourself. They remind you of your worth and talents.
If you’ve noticed, positive people usually don’t criticize others. Instead, they may lovingly point out ways to improve. On the other hand, negative people will always have a way to bring you and themselves down simultaneously.
It’s obvious what you should do in this case. Stay as far away from toxic behavior or negative people as possible.

5. Good mantras and proclamations

Not only should you talk good to yourself, but you should also proclaim your good points. When you feel inferior, speak a positive mantra about yourself.
For instance,  you may say, “I am talented”, and “I am kind”. This helps build you up by speaking your worth out loud. Whether you are spiritual or not, I’m telling you, the spoken word is a powerful thing. It truly is capable of turning things around for the better.

6. Always be yourself

If you’ve fallen victim to idolization, which we all do to a certain extent, then you should step back a moment. Immediately, stop all attempts to be like someone else, right now. After you feel clean of everyone else’s influence, fill yourself with yourself.
That’s right, embrace who you are, and examine all your good points. I bet, you have so much to be thankful for, and so many hidden talents. This simple move can boost your ability to overcome inferiority and other negative complexes.

7. Stop comparisons

That brings me to another toxic and heinous act we fall victim to – comparisons. It’s so easy to feel inferior when we compare ourselves with others. We should never ever do that.
So, for this last method, let’s practice working to better ourselves apart from anyone else. Yes, appreciate others and their talents, but never let those things decide who you should be. End comparisons now.

We can all feel better about ourselves

Learning how to overcome inferiority complex is no easy task, I will not lie. However, being able to accomplish this task allows you to open up to a multitude of possibilities in your life. The ability to be confident is a power that so few actually hold. In fact, the inferiority complex inhabits most of us on some level.
Regardless, we should try every day, to love and appreciate ourselves. We are the only one like us on the face of this earth. We have a mixture of unique talents and characteristics that the world surely needs.
I’m going to say you’re beautiful, talented, and worthy, to help you jump start your journey on defeating the inferiority complex, and also just in case no one else has told you lately.
Be well.
 
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au
 

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 



About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 

Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

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publicado por achama às 04:44
Quinta-feira, 20 / 06 / 19

9 Signs of a Truly Independent Person: Are You One? ~ Sherrie, learning-mind.

9 Signs of a Truly Independent Person: Are You One?

By Sherrie.

June 20th, 2019

 

Being an independent person doesn’t come from living an easy life. The trials of life make you stronger.

I get angry sometimes when things go wrong. I sometimes lose hope when past hardships repeat themselves over and over. But I think this happens because there is yet something we’re meant to learn. I also think these trials can make prosperous. This means, no matter how hard it gets, I know I can be an independent person.

How strong and independent are you?

Being an independent and strong person comes with a price sometimes. We build walls when experiencing hurt after hurt. The callouses that form over pain and abuse can also leave us a bit insensitive to the feelings of others.
However, that’s not how we all work, or how we should strive to be. Some of us become independent without losing the ability to open up. That’s the focus of our strength.

Anyway, here are signs that you could be an independent type of person. Or maybe someone you know has these traits.

1. You can live alone

Being independent means you can live alone. You don’t need the help of others to survive, and you always find a way to stay financially stable.
You also have no need for occupying the same spaces with other people, unless of course, you want to. You’re so good with yourself that living alone is actually preferable at times.

2. You’re a future planner

While many people say “live in the moment”, an independent and solid person will always plan for times to come. They see the big picture and not the temporary high of present fun and companionship.
I will say it’s good to enjoy each day, but it’s also important to save for the future. Independent people are perfectionists at planning for the future.

3. Saying ‘no’ isn’t hard

For some, saying no is difficult, especially if they are afraid of hurting the people close to them. For dependent people, saying yes, and going along with things is easier than mustering the strength to decline.
People of an independent nature can easily say no and not even give an explanation for their answer. They are bold and present an attitude that says, “I’m saying no just because I want to.”. Do you see?

4. It’s hard to ask for help

Asking for help isn’t hard for some, but for independent and stubborn people, they hate charity. To independent individuals, asking for help means weakness.
Being weak cannot be a part of their plans, for present or for the future. To them, it may even be a sign that they cannot make it on their own if they ask for help.

5. You have few friends

When you’re independent, you have fewer friends than most people. Truth be told, this is because you spend time with people expecting nothing in return.
Now, I don’t know how true this is for everybody, but many of those with many friends often expect favors and help. Since you’re independent, you only see friends as companions. Choosing your friends in this manner helps you realize who you truly appreciate and love.

6. You have an unshakable self-worth

When you’ve become an independent person, you won’t have to get validation from other people. No matter how many insults they use, you will still know who you really are. You will see your value, your beauty, and your loyalty, and nothing can change this.
Of course, there may be times when you’re shaken momentarily, but you bounce back. This helps you see the one who insults you for who they really are. You will know this independent individual by their resilience in the face of adversity.

7. You go out alone

Most of the time, you will go out alone. You love to shop for things alone because you can go and leave as you please. You even like to eat at restaurants alone sometimes.
Being alone in public feels good to you, and it doesn’t leave you empty. You don’t have to socialize with friends out on the town, but you can still have a conversation with people who are already there. It’s an interesting trait.

8. You can lead

When independent, you can take the lead and get difficult things done. You will notice both men and women taking charge of difficult situations, and this usually means they are pretty independent of others.
Sometimes men are intimidated by women who take charge, but unfortunately, this is because they are usually the dependent sort. Strong men aren’t intimidated, they rather help strong women succeed. This can be seen the other way around too but in a slightly different aspect.

9. You’re financially independent

Yes, we already know the independent sort are people who live alone, and they are also those who refuse help. Well, if, for some reason, an independent person just happens to owe money, say for car payments or other financed things, they will most certainly be on time and try to pay off the debt as soon as possible.
They hate owing people anything. It feels like independence is being taken away when you have to borrow money against something.

Being truly independent

There’s a reason people act the way they do. Some are born independent while others grow into these strong individuals because of past trauma or life-long hardship. They’ve learnedtheir own value and potential. An independent person is one of the most exemplary types of human beings to ever exist, and I attain to become more like this as I grow.
Are you an independent one? Do you strive to become more independent? If so, you must take heed if you wish to become more independent that you don’t lose your ability to feel emotions.
If you’re not careful, you can build walls while building your confidence and strength. Here again, as with many other aspects of life, I think balance is the key. So, go forth and conquer.
References:
  1. https://www.theodysseyonline.com
  2. https://www.lifehack.org

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 



About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Thanks to: Learning Mind <noreply+feedproxy@google.com>
 

Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 

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publicado por achama às 19:56
Terça-feira, 18 / 06 / 19

6 Things Messy Handwriting May Reveal about Your Personality ~ Sherrie.

6 Things Messy Handwriting May Reveal about Your Personality.

By Sherrie.

June 17th, 2019

 

I’ve seen all sorts of handwriting styles, large and small. Messy handwriting reveals many things about a person as well.
People write with pen and paper much less than they did before. So, you might say that messy handwriting isn’t a concern for teachers, friends, and employers. The popularity of technology has transformed the way we create stories and complete assignments. Whether professional or creative, our writing is mostly digital.
However, some people still pick up that pen, and when they do, their personality shines through their handwriting.

Messy handwriting and what it may reveal

My son writes in the messiest way. Sometimes you can’t even read what he’s written. He is left-handed, but that has nothing to do with it. In fact, I’ve asked him to switch hands, but it just gets worse. What does this say about my son?
We’re going to explore that and other characteristics he may share with others. So, what does messy handwriting say about your personality?

1. Intelligent

I can surmise that messy handwriting has a lot to do with more than average intelligence. What’s the proof? Well, my son remained in accelerated classes during his entire education. His grades dropped during regular classes because he was bored with the curriculum. He is smart and his handwriting is definitely messy, as I’ve mentioned before.
If your handwriting is messy, it could be that you have higher intelligence. If you’re not sure of your child’s intelligence level, maybe you can have them tested. Pay attention if you do have an intelligent child and notice if they have a messy sort of handwriting.
I will mention this, however, there are a few studies which suggest the opposite, that neat handwriting is linked to higher intelligence, so keep that in mind.

2. Emotional baggage

Many people who have messy handwriting can also be carrying emotional baggage. Often this writing is filled with a mixture of cursive and print letterforms, usually slanted to the left.
In case you didn’t know, emotional baggage is emotional hurts carried over from one person to another, or from one situation to a different situation in life. The writing shows the inability to let go emotionally. The words are just unsure.

3. Volatile or bad-tempered

A person who exhibits a bad temper will often write in a haphazard way. It doesn’t always mean they are quick to get angry, oh no. Sometimes it’s just that they carry anger inside until they have a violent outburst. Again, an example using my son, as he has a tendency to hold in anger until he explodes. This shows in his writing.
A bad temper can cause bad handwriting just because people with this anger disposition are usually impatient. With messy and rushed handwriting, we can see the strong emotions come through.

4. Mental issues

Messy handwriting can indicate that the person could have a mental illness. Often this handwriting will consist of switching slants, a mixture of print and cursive writing, and large spaces between sentences. I am sitting here right now looking at a page of my writing from last night.
I have multiple mental illnesses, and my writing shows my instability. I have also witnessed several others with mental illness who have the same sort of writing style. Now, I know it’s not set in stone, but it’s a pretty good indicator of some sort of connection between the two.

5. Low self-esteem

Have you ever noticed the handwriting of someone with low self-esteem? It’s strange and yet messy as well. Those with low self-esteem not only have messy handwriting but also have random loops and strange styles of capital letters.
People with low self-worth are insecure, and yet they are trying desperately to rise above the insecurity by purposely enlarging their letters as they write. As they attempt to do this, they also try to write in bubble letters.
This usually falls right back into messy and disorganized handwriting because it’s hard to hold onto the façade. I know this why? Because sometimes this is me.

6. Introverted

While this might not be true about everyone, it was true about my brother at one time. While my brother has changed and embraced some extrovert attributes, it’s usually in the online atmosphere I remember he used to write everything in these tiny messy sentences. You could barely read them although they were lovely and interesting if you succeeded.
Does he still write like this? I have no idea because most of his dictation is online. I do believe that introverts, like my brother, sometimes write in messy forms. Maybe his style hasn’t changed much.
I also believe introverts are intelligent and so this matches another aspect of messy and cluttered handwriting. As introverts stay at home a lot, they usually have less to prove to others, and so their handwriting is pretty much as they please.

Are you a messy writer?

Many of my family members have messy handwriting, and yet, my middle son has neat and beautiful handwriting. But that’s another topic altogether and for another day.
Remember, most of the attributes of your personality are positive when it comes to having a messy sort of handwriting, so you should be proud of your scribble. I’m okay with mine.
 
References:
  1. https://www.msn.com
  2. https://www.bustle.com
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 



About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Thanks to: Learning Mind <noreply+feedproxy@google.com>
 

Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 

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publicado por achama às 00:58
Sábado, 15 / 06 / 19

How to Escape Reality without Drugs with These 7 Safe and Simple Methods ~ Sherrie.

How to Escape Reality without Drugs with These 7 Safe and Simple Methods.

By Sherrie.

June 14th, 2019

 

You don’t need drugs or alcohol to escape reality. There are many ways that you can take a break from life.

 
Let me tell you, I understand how horribly unbearable life can get. And honestly, you have to be present mentally for the most part. It’s just the responsible thing to do. But, there are some times when you just have to escape reality in order to calm down.
Taking this sort of break from life can help you come back to reality with a fresh perspective. It can help you make better decisions and take charge of your future. I am in great need of a few escape hours, even days.

Going it sober

So, as you already know, there are many people who turn to drugs in order to escape the reality of their lives. Although opinions vary, I think science has offered us better ways to get back on track. Prayer and meditation are prime examples.
With these tools, you give control to something else for a while and get that needed rest you so desire. Here are a few other ways to do this as well.

1. Make something

One of the best ways to escape this thing we call reality is to create something. Being creative takes focus.
If you’re paying full attention to the thing you’re trying to create, the negative thoughts will not have room to influence your thinking. And we all know about the negative thoughts that attack our minds from day to day.
So, getting creative by painting, singing, or even cooking a new dish is a great way to escape.

2. Listen to music

No matter how hard it gets, music can take some of the edge off your problems. If you listen to music before surgery, it actually reduces anxiety and fear, helping you relax.
You can actually remove yourself from the situation at hand and get lost in the soothing sounds of music. Although a tiny bit different, listening to nature sounds is a great idea too.

3. Get active

If you’re struggling with some seriously bad life issues, you have to face them head-on. However, if you’re feeling a bit overwhelmed, you can also take a break for a little while. Physical activity not only promotes good mental health, but it also serves as a great distraction from life’s problems that seem hard to solve.
In order to escape the bonds of reality, try just 20 minutes of exercise a day for 5 days a week. You will notice a big difference in how you handle things and how you respond.

4. Take a nature break

If you’re looking for a place to get active and escape your reality for a bit, choose nature. Instead of staying inside, get out and let your mind take in all the natural wonders of life. You can take a hike, go fishing or even go camping.
This helps you stay away from smartphones, televisions, and computers for a while, and much of the world’s troubles can sneak in through electronics. Step away and step into nature for a while. It does work.

5. Read a book

Here’s one of my favorite ways to escapes the worries of reality. Reading a book transports you to another world where your problems probably don’t exist. To help expand this escape, try reading comical stories or stories with uplifting themes.
I sometimes have to force myself to step away from life with a book in hand. As I start to read, I realize that many of us have lost the ability to enjoy the simple things in life. It’s the simple things in life that can actually help us escape our reality, believe it or not.

6. Journal your thoughts

If you’re reading to help deal with reality, you can take a step further, and start journaling your thoughts. This is especially useful when you really don’t have anyone to talk to about your problems.
Keeping a journal allows you to write about what’s bothering you, helping you process these issues in a healthy manner. You may not get any answers from another person this way, but you may learn different ways to deal with your problems after writing them down in a journal.

7. Utilize laughter

Have you ever heard the saying, “laughter is the best medicine”? Well, honestly, it can sometimes be just that. You might not be able to find many things in your life lately to laugh about, but if you purposely watch a comedy or read a funny book, you can coax a bit of laughter from deep within.
The act of laughing can improve your mood by releasing endorphins and increase blood flow.

An escape can save your life

Unfortunately, some problems become more than we can handle. If life gets too heavy, we can fall into depression and totally lose control. This can happen with anxiety as well.
It’s important to escape reality from time to time so you can figure out what’s best for you and for your individual situation. You can clear your head and organize your priorities until things seem sane again.
I know this because I often have to get away just to catch my breath. I use these methods in my life. I hope these ideas work for you as well.
References:
  1. https://lifehacker.com
  2. https://www.cheatsheet.com
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 



About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Thanks to: Learning Mind <noreply+feedproxy@google.com>
 

Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 

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publicado por achama às 02:01
Sexta-feira, 14 / 06 / 19

What Is Primacy Effect and How It Messes with Your Memory and Perception ~ Sherrie.

What Is Primacy Effect and How It Messes with Your Memory and Perception.

By Sherrie.

June 13th, 2019

 

Ever wondered why you remember some things and other things are quickly forgotten? Well, this could be due to the primacy effect.
The science behind the primacy effect is simple yet complicated to navigate. I’ve recognized the characteristics of this effect many times in my life. This curious state of mind works in a valuable way, helping us remember certain important facts.
Unfortunately, other seemingly important information is dulled or completely lost from memory, unless placed last. In the model of first, last, and middle, primacy is the information that’s remembered first and is more likely to be stored in the long-term memory. Here’s a bit more information.

The meaning of the primacy effect

The primary effect was established in 1940 by Solomon Asch. This was when the primary principle came into being. Basically, the primacy (remembering the beginning facts) and recency effect (remembering the last facts) are two strong characteristics of how our brain works.
For instance, if we make a grocery list, the first few items will be remembered much better and even stored within our long-term memory. The items in the middle of the list may be harder to recall, even harder than the last items (which are considered the recency effect examples.)
But to focus on primacy, the effects are seen easily in studying for exams as well. Again, the information first read will be stored faster and thus remembered quite well for the test. Questions involving these facts will be easy to answer correctly.
So, the primacy effect is a positive thing, right? Well, for the most part, but there are ways it can distort our own and the perception of others.
Let’s take a look at the flaws of the primacy effect.

1. First impressions

Everyone knows what first impressions are, but do they really understand the implications of this? Well, when you look at the primacy effect, you can see how there could be a negative take with the first time you meet someone, especially if things go all wrong.
If your first impression isn’t that great, it can frame how the other person views you. Remember, this first encounter with you is what they remember the most.., just as the last encounter will be.
In this situation, the primacy effect can greatly change how a person views another, even to the point of severing future contact altogether.

2. Reputations

In a way, being late for your first day at a new job can be seen as a first impression, and really, it is. But, it also helps us look at how reputations are formed. The fact is, you may not ever be late again, but your reputation could already be spoiled, causing you to lose out on advancements in the workplace or even fall victim to termination.
Although the primacy effect helps us remember the first facts and commit them to long-term memory, we miss so many good things in the middle sometimes, especially where the true value of a person is concerned. It’s detrimental to us and others.

3. Emotional distortion

The primacy effect can influence our emotions as well. We often feel the first emotion much stronger, whether it’s happiness, paranoia, or anger, and we give little time for the emotion to deepen or change. Many rash decisions have been made due to focus on the primary emotions.
Also, as you know, primary emotions are the ones we remember for a while. They can change the way we see many things. It’s like an imprint.
Even though the thought process, as it deepens, is considered the “middle” and not the first thought, it often has some of the best rational thinking and analyzation. Our perception of many things has been changed due to this effect.

4. The formation of lists

Another way that the primacy effect can influence our perception is by their role in lists. As I stated before, the item at the top of the grocery list will not be easily forgotten, while the other various ingredients may be.
This is just one of the shortcomings of the primacy effect. It’s also the one that propelled this type of thinking, to begin with.
Another way that lists are affected is when there are various descriptions of a person’s personality or characteristics. For instance, if you say someone is moody, beautiful, and dependable, you will always remember that they are moody above all else.
Likewise, if the order was changed to “beautiful, dependable and moody”, you will think of that person as a beautiful person…and I would bet you would see the moody description more along the lines of having “depth of emotion”.
It’s strange how that works, isn’t it? And guess what? This example was the first known experiment in the primacy effect back in 1940.

So, is the primacy inherently good?

While the primacy effect can indeed distort your perception, it can also prove useful as well. It takes a great deal of maturity to understand how the primacy effect and the recency effect can prove useful.
In fact, the middle is where you find some of the best information and form some of the best connections with people and situations. You just have to be open-minded enough to see it.
So, even though we can appreciate the first things we remember, we should also learn how to change the order and read again. Revisit the list, consider the applicant, and wait to see how we feel a few hours after we’ve grown angry. The primacy effect isn’t bad, and how we see this is how we respond.
References:
  1. https://journals.sagepub.com
  2. https://study.com
 
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

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Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

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publicado por achama às 02:37
Quarta-feira, 12 / 06 / 19

5 Signs the Illusion of Control Is Ruining Your Life and How to Stop It ~ Sherrie.

5 Signs the Illusion of Control Is Ruining Your Life and How to Stop It.

By Sherrie.

June 11th, 2019

 

If you think you’re in control of life, think again. The illusion of control, although sometimes positive, can have negative consequences.
Sometimes, to be honest, I believe that people who do wrong toward others are punished. Hey, maybe they are. As for me, if I fall into the illusion of control in this aspect, I spend much of my time thinking that I will be avenged at every insult or attack. That’s a waste of time.
The illusion of being in control can definitely be positive, as it gives us the confidence to handle a situation. It can also be negative because we cannot possibly handle every situation. The truth is, some things are out of our control completely. Our acceptance of this fact is important.

How the illusion of control ruins our lives

If you go even deeper than that, you find those who live every day thinking they’re in control of the entirety of their existence, which isn’t true.
There are signs that the illusion and trickery of control have taken over, pushing them toward a chaotic and stressful existence. Here are a few examples.

1. Paranoia

Paranoia is a sign that you are under the illusion that you control things. You might think you’re in control, but maybe you are just watching your life unfold naturally, good or bad. If your spells and incantations don’t work, then the illusion of control will tell you that someone has transpired to bring you bad luck.
Or they could be following you, trying to do harm, or even ruin your future. If you depend on charms or other luck bringing aspects to stay in control, you could be fooling yourself.
Your paranoia could get ridiculous if not checked. If someone you love is always paranoid, you could be dealing with someone who feels like they are losing this control they once had.

2. Dwelling in the past

Someone who dwells too long on past events may be living under the illusion that they could have controlled certain situations.
When you live your life, you make mistakes. Over time, these mistakes become part of the past. Some of them affect us and our loved ones deeply. The illusion of control makes us think that if only we could go back in time and change things, that life would be different.
And maybe life would be different, but dwelling on this fact creates a fantasy world that is unhealthy to live in. If you’re constantly reliving the past and rehearsing different ways you could have approached situations, you really are ruining your life right now.
You may even look back at “now” and wish you could have changed that too.

3. Abuse

You see this is relationships when one person tries to control the actions of another. But when it all boils down to it, you cannot really control anyone. Eventually, they will do what they want anyway.
If you notice one person in the relationship trying to control the other, this is abuse. They are also under the illusion that they are in control. They’re not really in control and they never will be.

4. Cosmetic surgery obsession

You know the ones, the women and men who keep getting facelifts, tummy tucks, and breast augmentation. Yes, those individuals can be obsessed. These people think they are in total control of how they appear and how long they will remain beautiful.
The truth is, cosmetic surgery does work, to some extent, but it cannot keep us alive forever.
We have yet to discover the fountain of youth and until we do, we will age, and we will die. That’s the simple and concise truth of the matter. Plastic surgery can ruin our lives by keeping us locked into getting more and more changes and leaving us always unsatisfied.

5. Reckless behavior

You will recognize those who suffer from the illusion of total control by their reckless behavior. These individuals actually think that they are invincible.
I thought like this when I was around 18 years old. They walk down dark alleyways, drive super fast on the freeway, and even indulge in drugs and alcohol.
They really think they are in control at all times, and they will even get furious if you try to stop them. You know these people well. You can tell by their restlessness and boredom.

How can we stop thinking this way?

It’s not easy to break out of a mindset that’s been imprinted upon us from an early age. But, if you can manage to see things from a different perspective, you can learn to actually gain self-control over your illusion of control, if you get my drift.
Utilizing self-control helps you see logic instead of fantasy. It helps you realize that you are no more powerful, invincible, immortal or lucky than the rest of us.
Once you’ve realized this fact, you can focus on really enjoying a good life. Life is full of so many wonderful things, some far out of our control. So, for what we cannot control, I hope we can reach a place of acceptance. I think there we can find the peace we so deserve.
References:
  1. https://greatergood.berkeley.edu
  2. https://www.sciencedaily.com
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

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publicado por achama às 02:48
Quinta-feira, 06 / 06 / 19

When Blaming Others for Your Failures, Consider These Uncomfortable Truths ~ Sherrie.

When Blaming Others for Your Failures, Consider These Uncomfortable Truths.

By Sherrie.

June 6th, 2019

 

Excruciating pain at a turning point of our lives will make us stop blaming others. Until then, we will be empty.
Thinking back as far as I can pick out times when I refused to take the blame for things. I remember tantrums in my teenage years, but usually, it was because I didn’t get something I wanted. I think blaming others came later on during my early adulthood when I blamed my shortcomings on the way I was being treated.

Why are we prone to blaming others?

Yes, negative treatment will make you feel victimized, and you will blame others for your future misfortune, but at some point, you must take responsibility. But there are darker, more selfish reasons for blaming everything on others.
Let’s take a look at why we do this hurtful thing, shall we?

1. To attack others

As heartbreaking as it is, attacking others is a way of hurting them to avoid taking responsibility. When approached about something they’ve done, irresponsible people become defensive and lash out.
They don’t have to be a narcissistic person. They could just be afraid of the consequences of their bad behavior, and they’re looking for a way out of the mess. Placing blame on others and flipping the situation may have become a natural defense mechanism.

2. Truth found in narcissistic behavior

I know a man, who, when angry, claims to feel no remorse for his outbursts. You can see the lack of empathy when he yells and throws tantrums that I recognize from my children’s early years.
The first time I heard this outburst, I was taken aback – I was shocked by the pitch and tone of his bellows. Something shifted between us in that moment.
I’ve heard this very man call others narcissists, when in fact, he fit much of the characteristics of this toxic personality. The truth is, it wasn’t always his fault, he was raised to take no responsibility for his actions. He used blaming all others as the only way he could feel healthy self-esteem.

3. Why can’t we accept failures?

I want you to know that it’s okay to be imperfect, and it’s also okay to let the world know this. Failure is just a part of life, and being open and honest about your shortcomings is a step toward growth and strength. It’s a strength that no one can take away from you. It’s an inner honesty with who we really are.
When we cannot accept failure, we cannot accept that we are imperfect. Most people who do this have created a facade that they show others. If someone manages to get close enough to them and sees the truth, they will lash out.
This is because the perfection they display is being threatened to be revealed. This can be devastating to those who are stuck in blaming and shaming others.

4. It’s easy and it’s lazy

It’s so much easier to blame all others for your mistakes. After all, who wants to take the time for self-analysis? We don’t want the consequences that come with being caught in a shady situation or making a mistake when brushing it off with lies ends the conversation faster.
Most of the time, unfortunately, those who play the blame game learned this dynamic early in life, and use it all through adulthood.
They alienate partners and fail at long-term relationships. They are sometimes remarkably gifted at hiding this about themselves, sometimes as long as two years into the union, but after that, the mask starts to fall off revealing some of the most childish and heinous behavior you have ever seen.

5. There’s no moral compass

Usually, those who have the habit of blaming and criticizing others are doing so to have the freedom to act in any way they want. They cover up things, they lie, and they avoid any sort of confrontation at all costs.
If they are religious or spiritual, they love to attend worship services as long as love is the subject of teaching. But as soon, as self-discipline and accountability are introduced, they proclaim they are being controlled.
Morality, standards, dignity, and loyalty, among others, are things they purposely overlook. After all, these things will interfere in their agenda, as I stated before. So, they start to downgrade spiritual aspects in life, but they do not convict themselves for the things they need to fix in their lives.
As frightening as it may seem, the doctrine they once followed will change according to their selfish needs instead of doing the right thing.

Hope for individuals who blame their actions on others

While it’s not easy to change what’s learned between birth and 7 years of age, psychology states that these years are the most impressionable years of a person’s life. What they are taught frame how they will approach things during their later life. So, this means, blaming others has become a deep imprint.
To help those who always blame their failures on others, therapy, intervention, and accountability is a must. At home, be careful not to fall victim to fear when they grow furious. Don’t invade their space, but certainly stand your ground.
Remember, it’s okay to feel a little sad when we fail, but it’s not okay to pass the buck to another. Let’s strive to be better people.
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://hbr.org
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Thanks to: Learning Mind <noreply+feedproxy@google.com>
 

Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

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publicado por achama às 17:48
Terça-feira, 04 / 06 / 19

5 Tools of Narcissistic Triangulation: Is Someone Doing This to You? ~ Sherrie.

5 Tools of Narcissistic Triangulation: Is Someone Doing This to You?

By Sherrie.

June 3rd, 2019

 

Narcissistic abuse is terrible enough, but having to deal with narcissistic triangulation is a whole other level of this illness.
I’ve studied narcissism and other personality disorders for quite some time. I’ve learned aboutthe traits and characteristics, and then, I discovered that we all have a certain level of narcissism within us. Did you know that? Well, it seems I’m learning something new every day, and that’s a good thing. Just recently I learned there was something called, “narcissistic triangulation”, and this has opened up areas in my life that were hard to see.

What is this form of abuse?

The narcissist’s tool of madness – triangulation – is a severe mode of alienating people from others that they love. Triangulation can also mean using gaslighting(convincing outsiders that someone you love is crazy), and it can mean draining life from the victim while gaining popularity with the victim’s loved ones.
I think it’s one of the sickest weapons that a narcissist can use. In fact, I feel nauseated at this moment because I’m learning that I know quite a few people like this.

Are they using narcissistic triangulation on you?

A narcissist, especially a covert kind, will use triangulation often during their abusive actions. It’s a way to cover who they really are. This happens when the victim starts to figure out the true identity of the narcissist. It’s almost a retaliation from being noticed, actually.
If the narcissist can use triangulation to separate the victim from all their loved ones, then the victim will be aloneeasy prey for the narcissist. Can you feel the disgust? I can.
So, let’s see if any narcissists are using triangulation on you:

1. Invoking jealousy

Narcissists who use triangulation will attempt to make their partner jealous. One of the most common ways they do this is by using a third party.
For instance, the narcissist may tell their partner that one of her friends flirted with him. This not only makes the victim feel insecure but also makes her try harder to please the narcissist in fear of losing his interest to her friend. It’s sadistic, honestly.
If you’ve noticed your partner talking about girls flirting with him, try not to respond. It’s your response the narcissist craves.

2. Division

Have you noticed your partner saying negative things about certain friends you have? If so, they’re probably telling these friends negative things about you as well. This happens when communication between two particular people could expose the narcissist’s true identity.
Pay close attention to who your partner talks about and his overall demeanor when he does this. He could possibly be using triangulation to keep control.

3. Gaslighting

Gaslighting is when a narcissistic personality convinces others that her partner is crazy or abusive. This is possible because of carefully manipulative instigation.
For example, a narcissist will say derogatory things about her partner until he gets mad. When he retaliates, she will say he is crazy. Sometimes she does this in public so that more people can see just how crazed he gets.
If your girlfriend is starting fights with you for no reason, be careful of gaslighting. This might be what’s about to happen, which proves triangulation.

4. Recruitment

Is your partner often calling in reinforcements from friends and family when you start fighting or having a disagreement? If so, then this could be a form of narcissistic triangulation.
Now, sometimes help is needed when dealing with serious issues, but leveraging people to one side is just not a healthy move in a relationship. You may have noticed how your partner’s family members always take their side, this is common of course, but this, in ways, is triangulation as well.

5. The break-up

If you’re about to break up with your partner, then take a close look at how it’s being done.
Let’s say it’s his idea, and not so much your own. If he is using triangulation, he is telling other people about how bad you are and getting them to agree with everything he says. One of these confidants is probably the woman he wishes to replace you with.
It’s a sick and twisted way of ending a relationship, but it fits right in with how narcissists use triangulation.

What you can do with this information

I’ve been reading about narcissists all day now. I was researching things and then ran off into tangents learning even more about the traits and characteristics of the narcissist. I’m going to be honest with you, this type of personality is complex and difficult to change.
The bright side is, now you have a few facts about narcissistic triangulation and how it works. It’s your choice what to do with this information. I do urge you to consider all aspects of your relationship, whether it be romantic, secular or simply a family relationship.
When you recognize the signs of narcissists and triangulation, it’s time to ask yourself one important question.
“Should I get away, or should I stay and try to help?”
The answer is up to you. Just take care of yourself and remember your self-worth in the process.
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://en.wikipedia.org
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Thanks to: Learning Mind <noreply+feedproxy@google.com>
 

Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 

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publicado por achama às 18:13
Quinta-feira, 30 / 05 / 19

How to Overcome Fear of Driving with These 9 Science-Backed Techniques

How to Overcome Fear of Driving with These 9 Science-Backed Techniques.

By Sherrie.

May 29th, 2019

 

If you’re afraid of getting behind the wheel, science may have some answers to help you learn how to overcome the fear of driving.
I’m not afraid of driving, well mostly. However, my mother was terrified of driving. Apparently, she almost drove off a bridge in her early years.
This horrific experience created a phobia for her, and she never got behind the wheel of an automobile again. No matter how many times my father tried to help her, she never managed to overcome her fear of driving and try. From then on, everywhere she desired to go, someone in the family had to take her.

Is this the only way to catch a fear of driving?

While past accidents can cause a fear of driving, there are many other reasons as well. If you’ve learned how to overcome terrifying feelings when driving, then you may understand what started the fear.
Honestly, you can have a fear of driving from the idea of traveling to a new location. You can also have a fear of driving from an already existing anxiety disorder. For some people, driving alone can be the solitary reason for this phobia. Yes, it can be that simple.

9 science-backed ways to overcome the fear of driving

I have good news for you today. You can overcome that horrid fear of driving. In fact, there are many ways you can do this. So, without further delay, here are ways you can kill that pestering phobia and get back to a normal life.

1. Do it again, as soon as you can

Many people understand the saying, “If you fall down, just pick yourself back up”. We understand this saying and we try to practice this in many areas of our lives in order to be successful. It’s the same with driving.
If you have an accident, it’s best to get right back to driving as soon as you have a good mode of transportation. This is because the longer you wait, the harder it will be to try again. In my mother’s case, she never gave it another chance, and eventually forgot about driving altogether. We should never do this.

2. Positive affirmations

When you have a fear of driving, you can use positive statements to not only calm you but remind you of how safe you felt before – this is in case you’ve experienced an accident.
For others who fear driving, these positive affirmations can quell simple fears by telling you things like, “You’re driving the speed limit and you’re driving just fine”, or “Driving is common and I should not be afraid.”
Yes, it may take a while to utilize these affirmations effectively, but you can do it.

3. Understand your anxieties

If you are prone to panic attacks when doing something scary, then your fear of driving can invoke these attacks. So, with that being said, you must know what triggers these attacks and understand the level of your attacks.
For instance, if you feel like you are moving up the scale of your anxiety at a fast pace, you should pull the car onto the side of the road. I have actually had to do this before, but it was not because of a fear of driving. I just happened to be driving when my anxiety went full-throttle.
But anxieties caused by driving can accelerate much faster and you have to understand the triggers to keep yourself safe while driving.

4. Create comfort

Before you ever start driving, make sure you are comfortable in your car. Learning the ways to overcome your driving fear starts with a clean, soothing, and well-functioning vehicle. All these things must be taken into account before cranking the car, such as car insurance and preventive maintenance.
Maybe you drive better with soft music, or maybe not. This will depend on what makes you comfortable. Sometimes soft music calms nerves and even drowns out the noise of traffic.
If you feel more comfortable driving alone, then try that first. Unlike some people who rather drive with someone, there are others who find noisy people in the back seat to be distracting. Whatever’s best for you.

5. Visualize the trip

Let’s say you’ve decided to try and take a small trip to the store. Maybe you’ve decided to try and face your fears – no promises here, you say. Well, here’s what you can do in this instance.
First, imagine the experience step by step. Imagine opening the door and stepping inside your car. You sit down and put the keys in the ignition. So far so good, right?
Now, as you imagine pulling onto the roadway, think of every problem that could happen, and find a way to overcoming that problem quickly. Maybe it was one of these situations that caused your phobia to begin with. Face it head on and develop a strategy to avoid that situation the next go around.

6. Follow progressive steps

Now that you’ve visualized the steps to getting back behind the wheel, you can try these in a progressive order. First, go out and sit in your car, then put the keys in the ignition.
Now, crank the engine and wait for a moment, listening to the sound of the engine. Now, drive around a short block and back home. Take someone with you now, and drive around several blocks.
Then do it on your own. You can practice this with bridges, then long bridges. After that, you can drive on unfamiliar roads and even on bridges over water.
Finally, you can muster up the bravery to drive on the big freeways. After you’ve mastered all that, you may even be able to drive in the rain or at night. Just take it slowly and try these steps.

7. Take lessons

It’s never too late to take driver’s lessons. These instructors can help you work through fears, and also teach you things you may have forgotten.
It’s okay to ask questions which can clarify concerns. It’s also okay to share the fact that you are afraid of driving. They can help you face these fears and learn how to get over driving phobias.

8. Get help

Also, if your fear is disrupting your life, you will have to seek professional help. Maybe the panic attacks are coming too often, or you just refuse to get into the car for any reason. If you live alone, this could become a huge problem. You have to get help in some way.
Here’s where to start: First seek help from your regular doctor. Tell them what’s going on and they can point you toward the right professional help. This could mean speaking to a psychologist to get to the bottom of your phobias.

9. Try a support group

Why should you join a support group with other frightened people? Well, although it may sound strange, it’s a good thing. Being around others who are afraid to drive will make you feel less alone.
You can discuss triggers and anxious feelings in an environment where you are understood. You can make friends as well, and you can help each other remove phobia obstacles.

Driving isn’t all that bad

Yes, learning how to overcome the fear of driving is sometimes difficult. It can take you back to the point of an accident – hey, many of us have experienced an automobile collision, it can trigger feelings from the past, or it can simply arise because you’re new to driving.
Whatever the cause of your phobia, it can be faced with courage. If you’re afraid to drive, don’t give up. Remember, you can do anything you put your mind to.
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://www.sciencedirect.com
 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Thanks to: Learning Mind <noreply+feedproxy@google.com>
 

Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 

Free counters!
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publicado por achama às 19:02
Quinta-feira, 23 / 05 / 19

How to Beat Fear of Flying with These 10 Science-Backed Techniques ~ Sherrie.

How to Beat Fear of Flying with These 10 Science-Backed Techniques.

By Sherrie.

May 18th, 2019

 

In this world, there are so many fears – fears of the dark, spiders, and even water. Fear of flying, however, is quite a common disturbance.
I had no idea that I was afraid of flying until I experienced my first plane ride. I was going home from Maryland to Mississippi when turbulence hit. When this happened, I grasped the shoulder of the man sitting next to me and he chuckled.
I was terrified, but he seemed to find my fear amusing. I guess he was used to this sort of thing. But I was not. It was clear from that day forward that I had a fear of flying.
I guess you can say, “Oh, you’re just afraid because of the turbulence”. Well, maybe that’s what alerted me to the fear of being in flight, but it’s not what kept the fear instilled in my heart. I will not go parasailing, I will not jump from planes, dear god, no!
When it comes to flying, I try every excuse to get out of the suggestion. I’ve even driven hundreds of miles just to stay off a plane. This is a bonafide fear of leaving the earth and flying.

Learning to fight your fear of flying

So, I guess this means, we shall learn to ditch the fear and terror of flying together. And, I’m alright with that. My brother tries to get me on a plane all the time to visit him, but I say no. So, if I lose my fear, I can make him happy and even learn to enjoy flying.
Let’s take a look at a few science-backed techniquesthat just might work.

1. Understand flying and physics

One way to start your journey away from the terror of flying is to learn the facts. If you’re unsure about how flying works, this could be a huge reason why you’re so afraid. You can learn facts about flying by simply doing an online search.
The bottom line is this: you cannot just fall from the sky in normal flight. You have to think of flying through the air as if you are swimming through water. The air does have a bit of support.
Research and learn more. Better than that, research and calm your anxieties. Also, make sure you learn the truth about turbulence and how the plane handles this issue.

2. Separating danger from anxiety

If you have a fear of being in flight, you’re probably seeing your anxieties as real dangers. Well, that’s a given, I guess. The key to this is to somehow separate the two so you can understand the logic.
One thing you must know is that your body reacts to anxiety in the same way that it reacts to genuine danger. If you can recognize your fear as anxiety and not real danger, you can harness this fear.
Please understand, and I am telling myself this too, just because you’re anxious doesn’t mean something is really wrong. You can use this mentality in so many other areas of your life as well.

3. Identify triggers

If you understand how triggers work in other situations, you will understand this as well. Identifying the triggers that upset you on the flight will help you work through these triggers.
The key is to examine the triggers you know before you ever get on the flight. This helps you work out a system to calm those feelings before they even begin. This is a precautionary action to stop giving in to the fear that you will soon be flying. I think this could work really well for those like us.

4. Build up to a flight

Instead of taking a long flight first, try making short hauls to help you build up the courage. When you experience a few uneventful take-offs and landings, you will feel more confident in taking longer flights. It’s like learning how to lose any other fear. One small step at a time generally works for us all.

5. Talk to others

Before the plane takes flight, talk to those sitting with you or near you. Tell them about your fears and if they will, give them ways to help you if fear takes over.
Most people will help in these situations, and you will find at least one person who will be your support. It’s worth a try to alleviate your fears, wouldn’t you say?

6. Fly often

When I read this tip, it sent a shiver down my spine, seriously. As I try to avoid flying altogether, this one seemed like pure torture. But, as I researched further, I started to see the logic behind this solution. It means, the more you fly, the less you will fear flying.
It’s like you get used to the sensations of flying, the feelings from the turbulence and even the crowded atmosphere. It may take a bit of prodding to keep you in the air, but over time you will be grateful you’ve pushed yourself to conquer this fear.

7. Look anxiety in the face

If you can anticipate the anxiety, you will feel when entering the plane, then you can outsmart this feeling. Most of the time, we feel much more anxious before getting on the plane than when we are flying.
We should, in a way, “embrace” the anxiety we feel before a flight, so it doesn’t seem so big afterward. You can then ask yourself, “Now, what was so bad about that?”

8. Distract yourself

If these don’t work, then try distraction. For example, when the doctor takes blood samples from my arm, I distract myself. This is because I get woozy when they do that. So, I think about yellow sunflowers waving in a field. It works.
So, with that being said, distracting yourself, by maybe listening to music, reading a book, or watching a movie can all help you get through the flight with less anxiety.
You can even talk to the person beside you if they seem talkative. Talking to someone enjoyable often seems to pass the time quickly.

9. Meditation

Yes, you can meditate to a certain extent on the plane. It’s not like a distraction but more like focus. When you meditate, you focus on your breathing and place yourself in a safe place for the flight.
To focus on your breathing, you pace your breaths while counting slowly. This technique is used to alleviate panic by promoting a calm anxiety free mind and being.

10. Use confidence builders

Here’s something you might not think about on a regular basis. I bet you think driving is safer than flying. Well, according to SerioiusAccidents.com, this is not true. Statistics show that while aircraft crashes can be more catastrophic, taking more lives at one time, there is more chance that you will be in an automobile accident than a plane crash.
I think we have such a misconception about flight because while driving, we are closer to the ground and we seem to have control of the vehicle. What’s more, even though automobile crashes happen quite often, the deaths seem to be spread out more through time than with one plane crash.
The fear of flying, in this case, is just anxiety ruling over the facts and statistics.

So, we can help each other

As I said before, I do have a fear of flying. However, I plan to utilize these steps above to help cure a bit of that. Yes, I am going to take it slow and no, I leave no promises about how quickly I will cure this. But, I do have a determination about things, and I believe you do too.
Let’s cure the fear of flying together. What do you say?

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 18:08
Domingo, 19 / 05 / 19

7 Signs of Ignorant People Who Just Pretend to Be Smart ~ Sherrie.

7 Signs of Ignorant People Who Just Pretend to Be Smart.

By Sherrie.

May 18th, 2019

 

Some people appear to be intelligent, but usually, these individuals are more ignorant than smart. There are ways to tell.
Have you ever met someone who seemed to know everything? Well, if you’re a bit naïve or just young, you might believe the things they say. However, if you use your head, your actual intelligence, and experience, you might find that these are actually ignorant people.

Are these people intelligent or ignorant?

I’ve personally been in the company of a few people who just weren’t as smart as they proclaim. And yes, when I was young, I fell for their self-proclaimed smarts. Now, I am older and I can sense when someone has no clue about their so-called facts.
Let me show you how you can tell the difference between truly intelligent individuals and those who are just ignorant and uneducated people.

1. Being Fake

One of the most common ways to fake intelligence is by trying to prove it. People who present themselves as intelligent, and push their form of intelligence on others are actually not that smart.
I’ve seen people who always seem to know facts about things they’ve never encountered or known. They put on a show and try to convince everyone of their authenticity. They want to be seen as smart, but the truth is, they’re not. If you’re not careful, you can also fall into this trap.

2. They don’t think of the future

Most people who pretend to be smart will always live for instant pleasure. Yes, it’s great to enjoy every day as it comes, but it’s also just as important to think in the long term.
Ignorant thoughts of people revolve around what they can get now and not what the future holds. They usually don’t have a plan “b” either, which also involves preparing for altered paths….which will also be governed by what the future brings.
Always make sure you balance thoughts of now and thoughts of the future as well. This boosts your intelligence.

3. Don’t apply their own principles

People who are ignorant but think they are smart are prone to neglect responsibilities. These are not just ordinary responsibilities, these are tasks and principles they have set for other people in their lives.
For instance, if they preach about being honest, and yet they tell lies, they are just not smart people. On the exterior, however, they project that they are really intelligent in their speeches for change. Listen up! Be honest and you will be 10 times more intellectual.

4. There is no critical thinking

Those who give advice but do not look within are devoid of critical thinking. Critical thinking is when you ask yourself if you’re doing the same things that others are doing.
If you are offended by someone’s insults, then ask yourself, “Do I insult people as well?” If you don’t ever do analyze your own actions and words, then you’re not as intelligent as you think, and you sure don’t let people know this fact.

5. They like dramatic events and relationships

When ignorant groups of people get together, they enjoy gossip. Most of this gossip revolves around the drama that happens in their lives, whether it’s about work or something at home.
You can see the lack of intelligence as they laugh about the misfortune of others. What they fail to understand is that this same misfortune or something similar can happen to them as well. But they just don’t have the intellect to consider this fact.

6. They listen less and speak more

Those who are really ignorant types of people just have to get their point across all the time. When they’re with friends or family, they tend to hog the spotlight will tales of their accomplishments and good deeds.
When others want to talk, ignorant individuals often interrupt and change the topic back to the same old story they’ve been telling.
Smart people listen, I mean really listen to what others have to say, giving room to hear and yet develop their own thoughts and opinions quietly. So remember, listen and learn.

7. Envious of other people

Ignorant and selfish people are often jealous of others. I don’t necessarily mean jealousy as in relationships. They are jealous and envious of the accomplishments of others.
Instead of striving toward their own goals, they often copy or try to steal recognition because of their envy. It’s the ignorance that’s hidden by the attempt to seem smart in their endeavors.
They will definitely take credit for their behavior in this area. Just be happy for others and focus on your own accomplishments.

No, you’re not as smart as you think you are

If you fall into any of these categories, you should check yourself. By the way, staying away from this behavior and actually asking help from others makes you smarter. Continuing to learn things about life is also a great way to boost your intelligence instead of keeping what you have and faking it.
Some people may be fooled for a while, but they will eventually recognize ignorant people for who they really are. So, if you are trying to fool others with your fake intelligenceit will not work forever.
Here’s a challenge if you suffer from this. Take some time to learn, ask, and become more selfless. In the process, your intelligence will grow and you will actually become just as smart as you think you are…maybe even smarter. It’s just a thought.
References:
  1. https://www.lifehack.org
  2. https://www.dailymail.co.uk

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

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publicado por achama às 05:08
Domingo, 19 / 05 / 19

Debt Problems: Consumer Society’s Tool of Manipulation and Control ~ Sherrie.

Debt Problems: Consumer Society’s Tool of Manipulation and Control.

By Sherrie.

May 17th, 2019

 

Life isn’t always fair, and debt problems remind us of this fact. Debt is controlling, so make wise decisions to avoid this.

I’ve been in debt, oh yes, but I am thankful that it was a problem I fixed as soon as possible. However, I have seen other people’s debt spiral out of control at a fast rate. Debt problems for them were more like tsunamis, hitting hard and leaving few surviving options.
I watched them go down, and it took quite a long while for them to swim back to the surface. It was heartbreaking not being able to help like I wanted, in fear that debt would attack me again as well. Debt is contagious and can be used as a form of control like this.

How we are tricked into living with debt problems

Debt and the problems which come with it are manipulative. It’s society’s way of holding sway over consumers in order for more money to circulate.
I learned a bit about this in economics class during college. I was taught that if money didn’t circulate, the economy would fail. Yes, money has to circulate, and yes, we must purchase things for this to happen. And I am sure most of you understand this.
But, do we really have to get so out of control in this area? There are so many ways that debt becomes a problem. It becomes a manipulative beast. Let’s examine a few ways it works:

Consumerism can be devastating

While the world of economics thrives off consumer purchases, us, as consumers sometimes suffer greatly from them. As products are introduced, we desire them.
As others are getting these products, we grow envious. Sometimes, we understand that we cannot afford these products, but we find a way to attain them anyway.
Most of the time, we use small loans to acquire what we want. It can have good results or bad ones, all depending on how we use these financial tools. Yes, this type of spending also keeps money flowing through the system, but how does it affect national debt?

National consumerism

Yes, debt is seen on a grander scale. Debt as a national problem can affect, not only us as an individual, but also the world.
As we produce products to improve sales in fast food restaurants, for instance, we are putting a great strain on the production of livestock and farms. In other countries, which do not thrive on fast food industries, which means poorer countries, livestock and farms are used in more logical rates.
So, how does consumerism contribute to debt? When we want something, whether it’s individually or as a group, again, this brings us back to credit cards and loans. We often pay with money we do not have in order to purchase some things we don’t need or that we waste.

Paying the minimum trap

You now understand that debt is a major problemCredit card debt is one of the worst kinds of traps for the consumer when misused. While credit cards can be beneficial, they can also be a seed that exacerbates one of the greatest debt issues. Here’s why.
Do you want something you cannot afford? Well, some people decide to wait until they have enough money to attain this product or service. Others, however, use credit cards to attain the product now.
This is how credit cards work. We purchase products and we pay at a later date. But of course, most of you already know the benefits of using credit. How credit cards fail is when payments aren’t made and late fees accrue, creditors turn to the Minimum payment trap.
While paying the interest gives you more time, it adds to your credit card debt. Some consumers have been stuck with this sort of debt for most of their lives.
Minimum payments help you temporarily get out of paying a huge payment on your past purchase, but it also pushes other fees into future regular payments. These fees grow until your debts are out of control.
Obviously, credit card debt is easy to understand, but it’s not easy to eliminate when the debt has gotten out of control. But will we stop making these unwise decisions?

Taking the loan route instead

While loans aren’t exactly like credit cards, they can bring about debt and problems in a similar manner. The worst action you can take with loans is by taking another loan to pay the first one.
As interest grows, loans for loans tend to make it almost impossible to pay what’s owed unless a great deal of money is shelled out to remedy the accruing debt. And some loans are necessary, like buying a home or car. This is much different than using loans for personal reasons like getting things immediately instead of waiting to afford them.

The real pain and the devastating consequences

One of the scariest things for me to consider as a consumer is the long-term effects with my own personal debt. Loans, such as education loans can also be debilitating and extremely controlling.
Did you know that a loan of $40,000 or more can seek payments for the rest of your life? It’s true. This is the predicament my own son is in now. This debt also affects me as a parent as well.
Education loans have become ridiculous and there are few ways to escape the debts they develop. A few options are available, but few remove the responsibility entirely.

You can win the manipulative game

As for loans, as I stated before, there are few benefits, especially if you are never paying a large amount of principle, and interest is eating up your payments. All loans aren’t manipulative, but they can still cause problems like this.
When taking out a loan for a home, you start to build equity, this is true. Over time, the value of your home becomes greater than the remainder of your mortgage, and you may be tempted to take out a loan – do not do this. Taking out a home equity loan may be a bit different than personal loans, but it can still trap you in debt.

Let’s do our part to reduce debt

Debt related problems have become national. We just can’t keep purchasing products, services and the like without severe repercussions. As we go into debt to resolve a debt, it becomes a never-ending cycle of destruction.
The sad part is there are more than a few options for society to control national debt, this control creates debt which lasts a lifetime.
The good news is, we can start individually. We can waste less, buy less unneeded productswhile still keeping the economic wheel turning. We don’t have to be underneath the thumb of society and it’s pressure.
All we need to do is take a look at other countries, countries which, in their simplicity, have learned to use products and services to fulfill a need and not so many wants in life.
Debt problems, yes we have them. However, if we can learn to avoid the manipulation and control of society, we can learn to reduce this debt over time.
Are you up to it? Are you ready to make a change? Yes, be wise, invest in improving your home and other possessions, but be wise to the tricks society uses. There are good and bad choices. We should be able to tell the difference now.
 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 04:36
Domingo, 19 / 05 / 19

How to Use the Power of Suggestion to Transform Your Life ~ Sherrie.

How to Use the Power of Suggestion to Transform Your Life.

By Sherrie.

May 16th, 2019

 

The power of suggestion is much stronger than you realize. Its fantastical reputation holds many truths.
I know, for a fact, that the spoken word is powerful. I’ve learned this through my own spiritual endeavors and watching things happen according to either the positive or negative affirmations I make from day to day.
You may also encounter ways this power of suggestion works for yourself. In rare cases, you may learn how it can be used in opposition.

The true power of the spoken word

The power of using suggestions can also be beneficial when convincing others. For instance, a salesman uses this tool to sell more products or improve the reputation of what he’s selling.
People can change minds according to the words they use, and even make others like or dislike them at will. It’s amazing how well this actually works.
Then you also have negative and positive opposing opinions. What is known as psychological warfare is more common than you think.
In fact, people engage in this activity on a regular basis, and some see it as a normal mode of healthy competition. This is when you speak positively about a certain issue, but someone else is claiming a negative outcome with this same situation.
While I won’t get too religious here, I do believe the winner comes down to just how bad you want something, and if you believe your outcome will happen. It’s all about mindset.
Also, the more you speak these things into being, the more confident you will be in the future. The power of suggestion not only helps you stay in the right frame of mind, but it can also change your life completely.
The power of using suggestions to make things happen can be used by anyone, and for good or bad. Let’s look further.

How to harness the true power of suggestion

So, you have a pretty good understanding of what I’m talking about, right? Well, talking about it and taking action are two different things. What we want to do now is to learn how to utilizethe power of our statements.
Yes, you can do this too, and here’s how:

1. Be aware first

To use the power of persuasion, whether its to bring about positive outcomes or help someone see from your perspective, you must first become aware. This means being aware of your surroundings, how people feel, and the truth of the situations around you.
Being aware helps you understand how to formulate your words in your favor. It also helps you develop a plan for your outcome. Just take time to look around you, listen, and reinforce the truth of what is in the present as opposed to what will be.

2. Understand words

Before you use the power of positive suggestion, for instance, you must understand whichpositive words have the ability to bring about change.
As there are many words that can change situations, there are certain words which can hasten these results. “Valuable” is one of these words. The word “valuable” is so powerful because most people strive for value in the things they acquire in life.
On the flip side, negative words like, “dangerous” can have a marked effect on those who are about to make moves in their lives. If someone has plans, but then hears the word “dangerous” associated with these plans, it can change the whole decision.
Do you see how understanding words can be quite beneficial? Do your research on the most effective words of suggestion, and this will help you train that power you have within.

3. Using reciprocity

Here’s a simple way of using your power of influence with a suggestion. Let’s look at this one in a simple way. For example: If you need something done, you can sometimes get what you want by doing something for someone else first. I know this doesn’t really sound like suggestive power, but in effect, it is.
While I don’t advocate doing this just for gain, because it can be seen as manipulation, remembering a favor you’ve done for someone else can help you formulate a failproof suggestion to get what you want. It’s simply by reminder and obligation.
This might not be the most powerful mode, but it’s one of the easiest ones to understand.

4. Believe and play the role

If you want something to happen, believing is a huge part of that outcome. But, believing does more than just boost your morale, it also causes you to align your actions to your beliefs, as long as you have a positive outlook on the suggestions you’re making.
Your actions will then help pull things into the alignment needed to realize what you wanted in the first place. It’s a process that takes focus, but it works.

5. Keep an open mind as well

In order for your power of words to take full effect, you must have an open mind. First of all, a failure of any kind can make you discouraged and hinder your progress of getting what you want. Now, I said, it can, but it doesn’t have to.
You have to be strong and realize, with an open mind, that just because negative things happen, it doesn’t mean your plan and progress is wrong. Think about it this way, maybe each little falter is part of the path your power of words must take in order to manifest into reality.

6. Confidence

There it is again, that word that makes you visualize a person standing tall, head held high with a proud smile on their face, right? Well, confidence is a powerful tool for suggestion and realization.
It doesn’t matter if you are speaking good things into your life, or you’re trying to convince something to join a club, confidence holds sway like few other tools. If you have strong confidence, the power of suggestion is child’s play.

7. The support system

When you want something done or you really want to change your life, movements seem more powerful in twos, threes, or multiples of participants. Going it alone is great, but going at it with a supportive group amplifies your results.
The point is, all around the world, in every spiritual belief system or secular way of life, there is a need for a support system. Most people who believe in the power of using suggestive words and doing so in groups have a great amount of hope and faith.
This is how they get things done, and this is how they have the belief to keep using these powers of the spoken word. And, when failures come, they can be tackled and reformulated together, thus, even more, hope.

Utilizing your great power

You are powerful. Never let anyone tell you otherwise. I have felt the failure myself, at great depths and lengths, and still, I rise to readjust my mindset and reset my course. The objective is clear to me, and so I keep practicing the power of words and suggestions to change my life.
It can change your life too. You just have to believe to get started.
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://www.fastcompany.com

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 04:14
Quarta-feira, 15 / 05 / 19

6 Types of People Who Love Playing the Victim and How to Deal with Them ~ Sherrie.

6 Types of People Who Love Playing the Victim and How to Deal with Them.

By Sherrie.

May 14th, 2019

 

Dealing with those who are playing the victim can be exhausting. Who exactly are these people?
It’s hard to talk about the victim mentality because many people have no idea they’re adopting it. It can be upsetting when they learn this truth.
Don’t know what it means to play the victim? Well, that’s because so many character flaws and toxic behaviors like this are seen as normal. The fact is, being a victim and having a victim mentality isn’t the same.

Who is playing the victim game?

Playing games with people’s lives is a manipulative act. People play roles in order to get what they want, or simply because of their upbringing. They may be stuck in a negative pattern due to childhood abuse, neglect, or trauma.
Here are a few types of people who tend to use the victim mentality:

1. The selfish

Those who act in a selfish manner will use the victim strategy. Sadly, when it comes to choosing others over themselves, playing the role of the victim will remove guilt when being selfish instead.
It will also make others feel sorry for them and give in to their wants and demands. Selfless people, on the other hand, try not to use the victim mentality in order to help others without putting the spotlight on their own needs. It’s just a different mindset altogether.

2. Controlling individuals

Some people absolutely must be in control no matter what’s happening in their lives. They use pity to make sure things go their way. They want to control the outcome of their lives and the people in it as well.
If they cannot control others in any other way, they will turn to playing games and playing the victim.

3. Parasitic people

Sometimes people like this understand what they are doing, and sometimes they do not. You can become a parasitic person when you’re trying to build your self-esteem off others who feel more confident.
Being the victim allows you to feed off the compliments of others which ultimately drains them. You see, when you’re a victim, you will never get enough of praise and support. You could have been a real victim in the past, and now you’re stuck in this mentality.

4. Those afraid of anger

I’ve noticed many people using the victim game because of the inability to properly deal with their anger. In some cases, they are afraid of the consequences of their anger, or maybe they’ve experienced situations where they’ve lost control, and they hate the feeling.
Either way, the victim mentality eventually replaces the ability to have healthy angry feelings and hinders the proper processing of these feelings and emotions.
Remember, it’s okay to feel anger, it’s just not okay to misuse this feeling. It’s even worse to become a perpetual victim.

5. The mentally ill

People who suffer from mental illness will often play the victim. Yes, and I have done this too. Most of the time, it’s due to feeling overwhelmed by the symptoms of the illness.
With bipolar disorder, for example, the victim mentality may come after a severe bout of mania due to the refusal to take medication. Instead of accepting the fault of not taking their medication, they may play the victim to keep from accepting responsibility for the negative actions from their illness.
No, we should never be too hard on the mentally ill, but everyone has to take a certain amount of responsibility at some point, especially when that person understands what to do.

6. Trauma survivors

While it is completely normal to feel victimized after trauma, it’s not normal to hold onto being a victim forever. You must remind yourself, or remind your loved ones, that enduring traumaand healing makes you a survivor and no longer a victim.
This, like the case of mental illness, is a sensitive topic, so tread lightly when trying to help others. Also, be kind to yourself, if this is you, but also keep trying to restructure and rebuild your life.

Dealing with the victim mentality

If you’re the one playing the role of victim, you must look within. What are your inner voices saying to you? Are you telling yourself that life isn’t fair to you? If so, there are probably other statements you’re using to justify your behavior.
You have to stop the negative voices. I know how hard this can be, but you can take one small step at a time. Practice turning those statements around into powerful assertions which help build your self-esteem. You don’t have to play the victim in order to solve a problem. It just seems like the easier way out.
If the one who is stuck in playing these patterns is your loved one or friend, then helping them transform their inner dialogue will help a bit.
You must understand, however, that changing thought patterns and inner statements will have to be done by the one who thinks these things. So, have patience if you’re willing to help.
Stand firm. Let your friends and loved ones know that you will not be taken for granted by victimizing behavior. While it’s okay to help people heal, it’s not okay to destroy yourself in the process.
I hope this has helped you understand what playing the role of victim means and who does this. Now, that you know, you can tackle this situation properly and take back control of your own life. I wish you well in your endeavors to be a better person and help others do the same.
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://www.lifehack.org

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 07:47
Segunda-feira, 13 / 05 / 19

7 Signs You Could Be Living a Lie without Even Knowing It ~ Sherrie.

7 Signs You Could Be Living a Lie without Even Knowing It.

By Sherrie.

May 12th, 2019

 

Could you actually be living a lie? It’s possible that society’s expectations have forced you to be something you’re not and living a fake life.
I’ve been living a lie. Yes, me. In fact, on many separate occasions, I have lived different lies. Eventually, I’ve pulled myself free and thoroughly cleansed all the crusty fakeness away for a while.
But, for some reason, it slowly grows back, gradually accumulating around my personality and changing me into something I no longer recognize. It can really be this serious, you guys. I think it’s a daily struggle, really.

So, what is living in a lie?

To live a fake life, or lie is to act or do things you really wouldn’t do. These are things that often make you feel uncomfortable or portray yourself in a disguise. Those who “wear masks” are examples of people who live lies. Let me give you an example.
So, I hate going on “girls’ night out” things. You know what I mean. Well, when I was living a lie, I forced myself to do this a time or two. Unfortunately, the situation was so uncomfortable that I secretly hated being there, so bad, that I grew nauseated.
I was living a lie, but no one knew how sick I felt by trying so hard. Uggh. Thank goodness, I hated living this particular lie.

Are you living a false life?

So, maybe this is about as clear as mud to some of you, so I will provide a few signs. These are signs that you might be living a life that’s not your own.
Maybe it’s so subtle that you never realized it before. Well, now’s the time to crack the code and do some spring cleaning within your character. There’s no need to live a lie. Read on.

1. You do what society wants

If you’re living a false life, you will always be concerned about what society wants. What you want out of life will take the backseat to what’s popular, what’s trendy, and the all the rest of the peer pressure.
You must fit in, or even rise above, and society must know this. You give society what it wants and then some.

2. You have a fan club

There are good friends, then there are associates. Then, there are what I like to call, “the fan club”. The fan club is the group of people who praise you for your deeds and looks on a regular basis.
This group of people usually keep an eye on you and expect a certain amount of good deeds, new possessions, or new plans to always be rotating. The fan club needs something to adore and you give it to them on a regular basis, sometimes ignoring your own real needs and the needs of your loved ones.

3. Following through, no matter what

Yes, it’s great to follow through on plans and choices. I get it. But, when it comes to realizing you’ve made the wrong choice if you’re living a lie, you will follow through anyway, despite the consequences.
The healthy choice would be to follow through as long as the focus is the same. If not, then it’s okay to change your mind. Those living in a lie believe others see changing your mind as a weakness. Know the difference and you will understand this sign.

4. Practicing facial expressions and laughs

One of the most noticeable signs that you could be living life in a lie is your habit of rehearsing facial expressions, laughs and even speeches.
Instead of just being your authentic self and winging it, you must be prepared and offer the world your best rendition of you. Did you get that? A rendition, not the real you, this is what you will present to the world, thus fake.

5. You will be sad

One sign that you’re not living the true life is your predisposition to sadness. You will be sad quite a bit, but you will try to hide this sadness because it’s not part of the façade you’ve created.
But, since you’re not really happy about the life you’ve created, you will remain sad anyway. Most people who fit into your plan will not notice the sadness, but the ones closest to you, in reality, will notice.
Keep this in mind. If you know someone who is sad or depressed quite a bit, try to figure out if they are indeed lying to themselves about their life.

6. You’re bored…always

When you’re not living your best life, you will always be bored. Nothing will be fulfilling because you’re usually doing things others like to do instead of what you really love.
Things like hanging out with friends constantly, vying for attention or talking on the phone/texting/emailing constantly – all are signs of terrible boredom. They are also signs that you’re living a lie.

7. Loss of identity

Who are you? If you cannot answer this question without mentioning others, then you have no idea of your own identity or worth. This means you have been living a life that’s not really your own.
This will only be noticeable when having deep discussions with some of the few genuine people that remain in your life. If you’re being questioned about your identity, just pay attention and learn what you can about your true predicament.

Living a lie is never a good thing

No matter how easy it may seem, or how pre-made this life may feel, it’s not the life for you – not the fake one. I believe if there were more genuine people in the world, the world, in general, would be a much better place.
If you are living a lie or you know someone who is playing it fake like this, don’t be afraid to improve. Being the real you is the only you that’s supposed to be.
Think about it!
References:
  1. https://www.theguardian.com
  2. https://www.psychologytoday.com

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 04:13
Quinta-feira, 09 / 05 / 19

How to Deal with a Psychopath with These 6 Science-Backed Strategies ~ Sherrie.

How to Deal with a Psychopath with These 6 Science-Backed Strategies.

By Sherrie.

May 8th, 2019


Science says it’s incredibly difficult to cure psychopathy, but there are ways we can deal with a psychopath and keep ourselves safe.
Upon reading the scientific studies on the psychopath, I learned one important fact: most curable psychopaths are juveniles.
It seems that learning how to deal with a psychopath and even curing them lies in reconstructing the brain of the young adult. This gives them time to grow older with a better mindset and view of reality. That’s because the sad part of this illness is that it’s an engraved and permanent part of the human being.

Scientific views on dealing with a psychopath

Science has learned a great deal about psychopaths. Let’s go back to the studies a moment. There is a theory that hippocampus, a horseshoe-shaped region of the brain, may be the reason for the malfunctioning. This area is called the paralimbic system and it overlaps other areas that control functions such as decision-making, feelings, and emotions.
Considering scientists have detected these indicators of psychotic regions in 5-year-olds, it stands to reason that psychotics are born the way they are. This is why curing the condition is so complex.
Want to see what a psychopathic person looks like? Well, here are a few characteristics:
  • No guilt/no conscience
  • No empathy/no loyalty/no concern for others
  • Blame shifting
  • Cunning behavior
  • Bored and always seeking stimulation/attention
  • Need to control
  • Arrogance
  • Entitlement
  • Lies and manipulation
Robert Hare, an expert in Psychopathy, defines the psychopathic person like this,
…social predators who charm, manipulate, and ruthlessly plow their way through life…Completely lacking in conscience and feeling for others, they selfishly take what they want and do as they please, violating social norms and expectations without the slightest sense of guilt or regret.
Wow, sounds scary, doesn’t it? Unfortunately, you’ve probably read through some of these and recognized them in the people you love. This is heartbreaking. Here’s something else that’s heartbreaking:
Many psychiatrists refuse to treat psychopaths. In fact, they are, in some ways, intimidated by this mindset. With that, how can you possibly stomach being around such a person? I guess it seems impossible, right.

Well, there are a few ways we can deal with someone who might be a psychopath.

1. Some people are just bad for you

You must accept the fact that not everyone means you well. Some people do not have a conscience. If you understand how psychiatrists wouldn’t want to deal with someone diagnosed as a psychopath, then why would you?
You aren’t any greater or worse than the rest of us, and I’m sorry, you cannot save everybody. Sometimes, you just have to stay away from the ones who continually hurt you.
If, by chance, you must be around a psychopath for any given time, remember to guard your weaknessesPsychopaths are experts at discovering your weak points, and they will exploit them quickly. They will use these weaknesses to make them stronger, and they will not care about the hurt they leave behind.

2. Depend on actions to reveal the truth

When it comes to dealing with the words of the psychopath, you must match these words with their actions. Someone may say they love you, but do their actions say the same?
This can be true in many situations as well. You must watch actions and don’t put so much credibility into the words people say to you. Those can just be beautiful lies.
There are three things you can watch out for, lies, irresponsibility, and broken promisesThese are a few indicators that you are dealing with a psychopath. Now deal with it properly. Stay vigilant and stay smart.

3. The win-win situation

To deal with someone you suspect might be a psychopath, learn how to argue correctly. The FBI knows how to do this. Well, here’s a secret. When you’re arguing with a psychopath, and you should know they always win, offer a resolution that puts them in a good light.
For instance, if you don’t want to give the psychopath money, then offer to wait for a time when you can give them more money, or tell them about a gift you’ve planned for them, and the money is the only way you can purchase that gift.
While this might be a weak example, I think you get my drift. Let them think they win if they go your way, then you’ve secretly won the argument. This just helps you keep your dignity and good character.

4. Keep supportive friends and family

A psychopath is notorious at working other people against you. No matter what happens, everything is your fault, and they will make sure their friends and family know this.
So, you should make sure you have plenty of friends and family that see the things the psychopath does. This is sometimes extremely hard because while you are honest about your shortcomings, the psychopath hides his shortcomings under layers of lies and masks.
Even some of the closest people cannot see the truth of the psychopath. Again, make the closest friends you can and make sure they see the truth. If you have to, record a few times the psychopath does to you in secret. If you don’t take these measures, the psychopath will utterly destroy your reputation.

5. Remove body language

When you’re dealing with the infamous psychopath, you should remember an important fact: psychopaths read body language to gauge your feelings, weakness, and your intentions.
This is how they formulate an aggressive and domineering approach to every situation. Body language is hard to hide, but it can be done. Practice not wringing your hands when nervous, and not looking away when you’re intimidated.
Take away the body language and the psychopath loses a bit of power they depend upon to dupe you. As they realize they cannot read you, they will probably go away or at least, respect you.
But even this appearance of respect should never be trusted. Just take it at face value and walk away. This way you end any conversation with dignity.

6. Pay attention to warnings

I know it’s not right to listen to rumors about people, but my daddy always said, “Where there’s smoke, there’s fire.” So taking information lightly is good, but please, do your research into the rumors you’re hearing.
I have actually done background checks on people that made me nervous or had bad reputations. It’s okay as long as you do not go overboard. Here’s the next step.
When you get the opportunity to meet the person you were warned about, check for any signs that match what you’ve been told.
If you see what I call, “red flags” then maybe you should get far away, especially if they are rumored to have psychopathic qualities. When it comes to psychopathic dealings, you should always be diligent.

Just be careful

So, now you know what a psychopath is and how they operate, and you know their characteristics as well. Now, keep your eyes open and be prepared to know how to deal with a psychopath if one comes your way.
If you’re already in a relationship with a psychopath or you have a psychopathic family member, then remember these tips. They just might save your sanity, your reputation, and your life as well.
I wish you well.
References:
  1. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov
  2. http://cicn.vanderbilt.edu

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 17:04
Terça-feira, 07 / 05 / 19

5 Types of Thoughts about Death and How to Handle Them ~ Sherrie.

5 Types of Thoughts about Death and How to Handle Them.

By Sherrie.

May 6th, 2019


Have you ever pondered on thoughts about death? No, I don’t mean suicidal thoughts, I mean thoughts of this inevitable conclusion.
If you’re having thoughts about death, congratulations. You’re a normal human being. We all think about death from time to time, wondering what it will be like and wondering how painful the process will be. Yes, we think about this life’s conclusion in many ways.

A deeper look at death

But, let us look deeper at the causes of our tendency to think about death and ways to handle those uncomfortable thoughts.
There are thoughts which transcend the pain and finality of death, wouldn’t you think? Death is more than just the sad end and more than just the worst situation. There are a few ways we can look at these death meditations.

1. Death as afterlife

First off, many people see death as a doorway to the afterlife, whatever that may be. Here, there will be no focus on any denominations or spiritualities, only the mention that some believe that death is not the end.
These thoughts about death can be both healthy and unhealthy, depending on how you see this transition. For example: even if you believe there is an afterlife, you should still spend time enjoying every moment to its fullest. You cannot take money or possessions with you, either way, afterlife or not.

2. Death as finality

These thoughts concerning death can be dark, harsh and yes, they can be unforgiving. Some believe that death is the end, and afterward, there is nothing. If you believe this way, it’s also normal and fine.
The important aspect of this belief is to understand if death means the complete and utter end, then it’s most important to enjoy, travel, love, and fulfill everything your heart desires. After all, this is the only chance you will get.

3. Appreciating mortality

We soon start to appreciate our mortality, when pondering on death, For some, immortality is the dream, but for others, the fragile mortality is so much more beautiful.
Take, for instance, the flower, it will not live forever, but isn’t it beautiful? Our lives are much like lovely flowers, we bloom and greet the world and then we leave as nature intended.
This mortality is natural and reminds us that we are part of everything which surrounds us. This is also a popular thought about death.

4. Wishing for immortality

Unfortunately, wishing for immortality is not healthy, unless you’re a scientist working on some ground-breaking technology to further the studies on telomeres (thought to be the answer to immortality, by the way).
Otherwise, death is coming, and dwelling on immortality, in my opinion, is just a waste of time. Remember, time is running out. For those obsessed with immortality, thoughts concerning death might liberate a few misconceptions about our role in this world. Just a thought…

5. Obsessive thoughts

Having obsessive thoughts about death borders suicidal intentions, but I’m not going in that direction. There is this place between suicidal thoughts and just obsessing over death which brings us down but keeps us living out of fear.
That’s just what it is, honestly, it’s the fear of death, which has turned into an absolute obsession. Being afraid of death, but not focused on immortality can leave us in a perpetually dismal place.

How can we deal with death thoughts like these?

In order to deal effectively with thoughts on death, we must understand how each of the categories above affects our lives.
Do we think about the afterlife? Do we dwell on immortality on earth? Dealing with death in a healthy manner will depend on how we think, basically. So, I will try my hardest to break it down for you.

1. A healthy perspective of the afterlife

If you think about death as the afterlife, then you’re probably a spiritual person of some sort. Whether you believe in God or many Gods, you will see death as an elevation, a promotion, or a different state of being.
While some may see this belief as egotistical or delusional, spiritualists and believers find peace with this idea of death. Overall, It’s healthy as long as it doesn’t become fanatical to the point of imposing on the beliefs of others.

2. No beliefs, no problem

There are many people who believe death is just the end. They believe in darkness, finality, and the great big….well, nothing. These non-believers seem pretty happy for the most part, because they have come to terms with how they believe, or don’t’ believe, however you look at it.
So, unless they are falling into depression, they may be completely content to do everything they can before the end arrives. It’s just that simple, and it’s okay too.

3. Is appreciating mortality healthy?

Whether we believe in the great beyond or not, we can still appreciate the here and now. Many people, coming from all walks of life, have learned to love their mortality.
Sometimes thoughts of death can get overwhelming, even in this appreciation and this is when help is needed. When these thoughts become intrusive, it’s best to get support from others who have learned to appreciate the finality of their being.
Many times, they can explain the importance of the cycle of life, and how we are all a part of a larger picture. This helps us understand that pleasure and suffering are part of the whole deal.

4. Immortality, good or bad

While there are studies being conducted on immortality, it can be quite unhealthy to put all your eggs in this basket. Why? Because as of now, we’re still dying, and we’re still dying at around the same age as we were a few decades ago.
So obsessing over immortality is not really a healthy move. It’s better to see immortality as something hoped for. Just remember, some of us would rather live and die, instead of hanging around forever. So, to each his own.

5. Keep a check on obsessive thoughts

Death thoughts that become obsessive can also become dangerous. Sitting around with friends and pondering on the death process – the pain, the decomposition of death – is just not healthy at all.
I’ve seen this through those obsessed with speaking to the dead and sleeping in the cemetery wondering about how it feels to be underneath the earth. You see, even what I am saying is probably taking you to an uncomfortable place. This is my point.
These thoughts grow and can potentially cause serious depression. All I am saying is just be careful not to fall too far into the pit of darkness.

What are your thoughts on death?

Yes, there are many unhealthy ways to look at death, but yet, there are also healthy outlooksas well. Thoughts pertaining to death can be scary and overwhelming, but they don’t have to be taboo. Please share your opinion and let’s talk.
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://www.huffpost.com

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 17:03
Domingo, 05 / 05 / 19

Feeling Inadequate? 7 Strategies to Silence Your Inner Critic ~ Sherrie.

Feeling Inadequate? 

7 Strategies to Silence Your Inner Critic.

By Sherrie.

May 4th, 2019


 

It’s easy to criticize yourself, especially when others criticize you too. Feeling inadequate is hard when rebuilding your self-esteem.
At least one point in our lives. We’ve felt inadequate. You know that voice, the one that says, “You’re not good enough”, “You’ll never find true love”, yeah, that voice.
Well, the truth is, its been around since your childhood. I bet you didn’t know that. Feeling inadequate came from some instance, most likely in childhood, where someone made you feel unloved or unwanted. Now, you feel the same way when dealing with your insecurities.
“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”
-William Shakespeare

Dealing with the critic within

There’s a person within you that tells you the lies about your person. They aren’t nice, and they pull no punch when it comes to reminding you about your short-comings. Do you wish to silence this voice?

Well, there are some ways to deal with this critic within and stop feeling horribly inadequate. Then you can really live your life.

1. Roots, roots, roots…

So, as I mentioned earlier, your inner critic comes from some long-ago insult or abuse. It’s true.
Say, your parents told you, “You’ll never be worth anything unless you act like your cousin, Martha”. Yeah, that was an actual statement my mother said to me. I started feeling the sting of being inadequate almost instantly.
Maybe she watched my cousin get awards in school or maybe heard stories of her achievements, But it made me feel like a failure. Now, I do struggle with inadequacies, and it takes strength to fight.
Hey, look at your roots, then you will know it wasn’t you, but the one who insulted you. Maybe they felt inadequate by the way they raised you. Ever think about that?

2. Awareness is key

When you start feeling emotions of being inadequate, stop and realize one important thing. These are only thoughts. They do not rule your life, and you know that you’re better than what you give yourself credit for.
Question these thoughts and then attempt to turn them around as they come. Be aware of what passes through your mind, and filter it accordingly.

3. See the inner critic as a challenge

Understand, these feelings that you are inadequate will never truly go away forever. I know, that’s not such a positive idea, huh. But, all is not lost. You can think about it this way: You can use your inner critic to build yourself up.
When you think you’re lazy or someone has made this comment, use this to start moving, get in shape, and even improve your health. While insults about your laziness or weight gain are not nice, you can use them as a tool to better yourself.
Just try it and see how great it actually works.

4. Contradict the inner critic

Here’s an interesting way to combat the inner negative voice. For example, your inner voice says, “You’re ugly”. Now, that’s a statement many of us have heard in our lives at some point. Well, you can take this statement and word it in a way that says positive things about you.
Instead of saying, “Yes, I am ugly”, you can say, “ I may not be the most beautiful person in the world, but I am still beautiful”. This statement helps build you up and stand strong against those who make you feel bad about yourself.

5. Ask for help

Feeling that you’re inadequate can get overwhelming and sometimes make you want to give up. Don’t ever give up. In fact, start practicing self-care which will, in time, start to build better self-esteem.
If you have to, take pictures of your accomplishments or write in a journal about what you’ve done lately. Don’t ask others for help, ask yourself for help in order to feel good about yourself again.
You might be surprised by all the good qualities that remind you of your self-worth.

6. The inner critic lies

Did you know that the critic within will tell you lies? You cannot always count on the words that come from inside. If you’ve made a to-do list, but yet you aren’t able to get all those things done, your inner critic will jump right in with insults about your inadequacy.
Do not fall for these lies. Instead, tell yourself, “No, I did not finish today, but I am further than I was yesterday”. The truth is, this is just fine, and your inner critic can go get a life, so to speak.

7. Don’t be a slave to your inner critic

When feeling those inadequacies, do not become a slave to them. Just because your inner critic says you should do something better, this doesn’t mean you should act upon these words.
If your inner negativities tell you to get something done faster, take pause. Maybe it would be better to take your time and get the job done right. You can learn to do what YOU want and not listen to the monster that pushes you from inside.

The inner critic and your feeling of being inadequate

Never start feeling like you are inadequate just because that voice within tells you so.
Trust the true you, the one who makes you feel good about yourself. Yes, listen to this voice instead. This voice will make your stronger and quiet those negative thoughts that have tricked you into thinking you must be better than you are.
Remember, you are good enough just the way you are. Your improvements come by hard work and determination, but they also come by taking a break once in a while and recharging your energies. Just do your best and that will be enough.
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://psychcentral.com
 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 22:56
Domingo, 05 / 05 / 19

7 Things a Covert Narcissist Mother Does to Her Children ~ Sherrie.

7 Things a Covert Narcissist Mother Does to Her Children.

By Sherrie.

May 3rd, 2019


 

While most narcissists are men, women can be just as malignant. In fact, the covert narcissist mothers are becoming more common.

Narcissistic females are thought to be rarer than their male counterparts. In fact, 75% of narcissists are male. Recently, however, studies have shown more and more covert narcissists are women. The covert narcissist mother, being one of the most malignant of the group, can cause some of the worst damage as well.

How children are really affected

You would be surprised just how much damage is done to children with covert and dangerous mothers. Yes, I said dangerous because later in life, this upbringing can cause mental health problems and even suicide.
So, what does this type of mother do to her children that’s so heinous? Maybe you will understand the serious nature by delving into the effects of the narcissist.

1. She devalues her children

One thing the covert narcissist type of mother does to her child is devaluation or triangulation. This means she uses one child as a scapegoat and the other as the perfect child.
This creates competition within the mind of the flawed child. This sibling tries desperately to please their mother which is almost impossible. In the meantime, their mother is doting on the golden child and offering praises day after day.
This sort of covert and venomous narcissist mother can leave her imprint way into her child’s adulthood. The effects surface by not being good enough and always comparing themselves to other people.

2. She has two faces

One way the covert style of the narcissistic mother affects the children is by the utilization of two faces. What I mean by two faces is that the mother is loving to her children when presenting them to the outside world, but behind closed doors, she is quite the opposite.
She shows off her children, then punishes them for small things later on. Sometimes she passes her duties as a mother to other people when no one from outside the home is around to see her true actions.

3. Invalidation and gaslighting

One of the most horrible things a mother can do is invalidate the feelings of her childrenand make them feel like they are the crazy ones. This type of mother does negative things and blames the actions of her children as the cause of her negative actions.
She doesn’t validate the feelings of her children as real concerns. This is because the covert narcissistic moods of the mother show no empathy. If something occurs that’s obviously the fault of this mother, she resorts to gaslighting to defend the truths of actions.

4. Her children are parts of her personality

A narcissist’s children are not individuals in her eyes. They are simply a part of her being, created by her, and under her control. She dresses her children in certain ways to represent herself, otherwise, she will have a reputation she does not want.
In public, she brags about her children, but in private she pushes them to be better – she tells them to lose weight or to dress better.. Her children are possessions, or better yet, extensions of herself which must represent her and not an individual person.

5. She competes and crosses boundaries

The covert version of the narcissistic mother will cross strange boundaries with her children. These are boundaries that are extremely disturbing sometimes.
If she has a female child that is developing and maturing physical, the mother will compete with her daughter’s youthful looks. She may try to dress more provocatively than her daughter and even try to steal her boyfriends or seduce them.
She crosses these boundaries because she is aware of her aging and no child of hers will be better than her in any way.

6. Outside possessions are more important than her children

covert narcissist will always find greater pleasure in providing for herself over the need of her children. For instance, she rather purchase new clothing for herself than for her children, even if they need new school clothing.
She is a selfish person and doesn’t care how her children see her. She will buy them the bare minimum and then again, show her children off to the world in their few new outfits. If you pay attention, you will notice the covert mother has more new clothing than her children.

7. She invades their privacy

covert and intrusive narcissistic mother will always break boundaries when it comes to her child’s privacy. Yes, you should, as a mother, be able to check up on some of your children’s actions, but not constantly. Sometimes it is best to let them have some privacy and figure out things for themselves.
An unhealthy relationship with your child will turn into unhealthy relationships when they grow older, destroying future relationships and causing others to resent them for their intrusive behavior.

Let’s be honest: Are you a covert narcissistic mother?

Look within and ask yourself, do you fit any of these indicators of being a parent like this? If you relate to any of these things, please try to change as much as possible for the sake of your child’s future. The treatment they receive now will be the foundation of their adult lives.
If you know someone who is a covert narcissistic type of mother, please provide help for their children if you can. Remember, you cannot break boundaries either or the mother will only punish the children for that as well. If anything, get anonymous support or help.
I hope these indicators and words of hope have helped you as well.
References:
  1. https://thoughtcatalog.com
  2. https://blogs.psychcentral.com
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
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publicado por achama às 06:38
Quarta-feira, 01 / 05 / 19

3 Interesting Decision-Making Theories Which Explain the Choices We Make ~ Sherrie.

3 Interesting Decision-Making Theories Which Explain the Choices We Make.

By Sherrie.

April 30, 2019


 

Decision-making theories come are quite useful. When it’s time to make an important choice, there’s no need to delay.
Whether we are familiar with theories regarding decision-making or not, in this day and age, choice is in abundance. What do we want to eat, which sofa should we purchase, do you get a dog or not? Because we have way too many options, it can make choosing much harder than it should be.
Choice is our ability to make decisions when presented with two or more options. When we have more than two options, we must make a choice. This is what the world presents to us. Therefore, it is the truth of how free will works. We can then live and artistically create the life we want to.
So, why is it so difficult? Ultimately, choice represents the sacrifices we must make. We automatically give up something else when we make a choice between two or more things.
This means, if we find ourselves wanting something else next month, chances are that choice will be gone – non-existent. We have to take what we have today, and this depends on what we choose.

Decision-making theories – the basics

Different approaches to decision-making are sometimes called Choice theories. William Glasser founded this term from a book with the same title. According to Glasser, freedom, fun, power, love and belonging, and survival are basic satisfied needs which come from choices we make.
The idea that choices are mostly made by humans, which enhance what we really want, is an idea that’s been around for quite some time. Choice and the psychology behind it is the reason we make the decisions that we do. It’s a subconscious decision that motivates our satisfaction and meeting those satisfactions.

Here are three decision-making theories that will help you to understand the choices you make. It might even encourage you to make better ones!

1. Our emotions connect to our actions

Neuroscientist and professor at USC and Salk Institute, Dr. Antonio Damasio says that our decisions come from visceral emotion. The definition of his theory is that there is a link between “raw” emotions and the part of the brain which governs decisions. He, therefore, concluded that decision making and judgment come from a critical neural circuit.
Damasio concludes that non-rational and rational processes bridge feeling and emotion. If meaning and motivation, would not be possible if emotional input was absent, and decision making could not happen.
Damasio believes that we don’t only base our choices on logic and fact, but also on memories and emotions. This is why we make decisions on unconscious levels. Our intuition guides us.

2. Decisions can be costly – literally!

Does making decisions result in reduced self-control? A study from the University of Minnesota points to yes. The study also showed more procrastination, lack of ability to persist in failed circumstances, decrease in physical stamina, and worsening of arithmetic abilities
Researchers, to conduct the study asked students for help. After dividing into two groups, the teams take on studies much like the others but to understand how choices affect things. Identical product lists were given to all the students in the initial experiment.
A singular group was asked questions revolved around how often, in the past, that the product was used. However, one group was about how often they’d used the products in the past. The same product, with variations, were chosen by the other group. In another experiment, one group answered questions such as this and the other did not.
“Making choices apparently depleted a precious self-resource,” wrote the authors in the conclusion of their study. “This is because subsequent self-regulation is poorer among those who had made choices than it was among those who had not. This pattern became clear in the laboratory, classroom, and shopping mall.”

3. Watch out for bias!

There is absolutely no doubt that our biases affect our choices. However, there is one particular bias that focuses on decision-making theories in many situations.
Loss aversion bias is one such example. No one likes to be left out or miss important things. Fact. However, it isn’t as important to gain something than it is to avoid losing something. This is the way aversion works. The endowment effect shows us through our desire to keep what we have instead of striving for more.
Daniel Kahneman, in yet another study, gave test subjects either an empty mug, nothing or chocolate.  They could trade or choose between two other objects. Half of them wanted the mugs, but those who already had mugs did not want to give them up – about 86% of participants, showing the desire to keep the possessions a person already has.

How to make hard decisions easier

Choices are hard, you see. I guess you understand now. No matter what, some choices you make will always be hard. However, some of these decision-making theories might just help you understand your own choices.
We don’t always have a rational reason to make decisions. They cannot separate from our identity, our location, or what helps us decide what to wear. Maybe we will be able to make wiser choices and help others make proper decisions too, as long as we understand psychological influences and factors that affect our decisions.
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://www.forbes.com
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Thanks to: Learning Mind <noreply+feedproxy@google.com>
 

Archives:

 

 
 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 

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publicado por achama às 19:50
A Luz está a revelar a Verdade, e esta libertar-nos-á! -Só é real o AMOR Incondicional. -Quando o Amor superar o amor pelo poder, o mundo conhecerá a Paz; Jimi Hendrix. -Somos almas a ter uma experiência humana!

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