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Quinta-feira, 16 / 01 / 20

7 Signs You Are an Overly Critical Person and How to Stop Being One

Sherrie Hurd.

learning-mind.com

Posted January 16th, 2020.

 
 

 
 
You may think that you aren’t an overly critical person until you read about it. If you are, you can learn how to stop.
 
I am an overly critical person. There, I went ahead and admitted a fact about myself. To be honest, in the last few months, I’ve realized quite a bit of unhealthy aspects of my personality. But instead of letting it drag me down, I choose to work on this issue and get better. Are you overly critical?
 
What is an overly critical person?
 
You won’t recognize that you’re criticizing and judging people until it’s been done to you, or until you start reading about the signs. You may think the way you operate is normal, and your intentions are to help others be better people.
 
But remember, every human is an individual, and criticism doesn’t change them, it shouldn’t. If anything is to be changed, it should be done by the one who wants to change. Do you see my point? Well, in case you don’t understand, read on…
 
Signs of criticizing way too much:
 
1. A negative upbringing
 
Unfortunately, so many of us were surrounded by negative people when we were children. Our mothers, our fathers, even extended family members constantly talked about other people, and judged individuals on one trait, or what they wear.
 
If you grew up listening to all this negativity, you may still think it’s normal to criticize people and judge them. Yes, this trait of being overly critical can be deep indeed.
 
2. Labeled a negative person
 
If the people who are close to you are saying that you’re negative all the time, then it might be time to evaluate yourself.
 
No, you don’t have to take everything a person says to heart, but when family and friends repeatedly tell you to stop being so judgemental, then you probably need to change that fact and try to be more positive. If you’re used to being negative, this will be hard to do, but it will be so worth it when results show.
 
3, Micromanaging is second nature
 
If someone in your household is repairing a window or cooking a meal, it will be almost impossible for you to let them do it without your help – moreover, it does not really help, it’s the fact that you will tell them all the ways they’re doing it wrong. You may even take hold of the tools or utensils and do a bit of the work to show them.
 
This is a glaring indication that you are much too critical of others and what they do.
 
4. You have a mental disorder
 
I hate mentioning this one again because it seems to be a growing issue. However, if you have a mental disorder, you may also have a problem with criticizing people. Paranoia will make youconstantly ask questions about how someone is completing a task. Anxiety will make you criticize almost everything, honestly.
 
I do this. If I don’t have consistency, then something is wrong. If someone looks shady, then I will say they’re shady. Yes, I am embarrassed to admit it, but mental illness can cause us to become extremely judgmental while we wish others weren’t so judgemental of us. So, when we fight the stigma, remember, let’s fight the judgment in ourselves as well.
 
5. Nothing is completely enjoyable
 
Do you know those people who go out and have a good time and come home smiling? Yeah, I’m not one of them. I want to be, and I want it so badly I could scream. You will recognize the overly critical person by the fact that they find something wrong with everything.
 
You could simply be going to see a movie, and they will complain about some trivial little things like too many previews. Ordinary people enjoy the movie and go home happy. No matter how fun the day is, the critical people will find the fault – we will find the crack in perfection.
 
6. You’re always moody
 
An overly critical person will always be moody, whether they have depression or not. That’s because not everyone else is doing things as you would do them.
 
For instance, a critical person can get angry because someone forgets to open the door for them. This could have been a one-time incident, but they will label it as being inconsiderate. There are so many things that moody people notice and it makes them even darker.
 
7. You complain all the time
 
A critical person will complain so much that they prepare themselves for the bad day they will have, no kidding. I got in the habit for a while of waking up and immediately wondering how someone was going to make me mad at some point during the day. I should have been thankful and thinking about all the time I had to get good things done.
 
Then when people come around, and something isn’t right, like you expected, you complain. You complain if you get too much attention, you complain if you aren’t, you complain if it rains, you complain if it stays dry and hot. No matter how wonderful the day is, a constant critical person will make it tarnished.
How do we stop this?
 
So, since I do this too, we gotta learn to stop together, right? I’ve been reading up on some material that’s starting to help me with this problem. If that critical thinking is deep-rooted in childhood, then when you start thinking that way, remember where it comes from and say a resounding “NO!”
 
What this does is it reminds you that you are not your ancestors, and you can see the world in a different way.
 
If you suffer from a mental disorder, then working with your therapist and telling them ALL the truth about your day will help them find ways to turn your thought process around. It’s all about your mindset.
 
I’ve learned that. You see, you’ve set your mind to bad, and gradually, with small steps, you can set it to good. Instead of saying, “Oh god, I wonder what crap I will have to put up with the day.”, say,“Oh, I am so excited to start this new day!”
 
For the complainers, practice finding at least one good thing about the person you’re criticizing. For the ones who criticize even their fun times, try to only have fun and ignore those pestering thoughts telling you that the drive was too long, or the bathrooms were too dirty.
 
It’s all about practice, you see. It’s bettering yourself a little bit every day. If you fail, just try again. Don’t let others’ negative remarks spark your negativity. Return a negative comment with a nice one. It will startle them and they will get confused. I’ve been doing this lately.

 

 

Sherrie Hurd

 

 

Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us. 

 

 

 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

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publicado por achama às 18:45
Quinta-feira, 02 / 01 / 20

5 Negative Thought Patterns and How to Challenge Them

By Valerie Soleil.

learning-mind.com.

Posted January 1st, 2020. 

 

 

 
They say that happiness is a state of mind – but what if your mind is your own worst enemy? Sometimes it can feel like our own brain is turning against us, assailing us with negative thought patterns that impede us from living a full and fulfilling life.
 
What Are Negative Thought Patterns?
 
These are thoughts and emotional reactions that feel almost automatic, as though your mind were drip-feeding your brain negative information. It can seem like you have no control over your own thoughts. Or like a leaky tap, which you can’t shut off, is continuously dripping negativity into your brain. This negativity that continually filters into your self-identity is hard to fight if you don’t have the right tools.
 
However, there are ways to train your mind out of these automatic negative thought patterns. Rebuilding your relationship with your own mind can empower you to own your worth and your power, helping you to manifest the life that you actually deserve.
 
But how? Below are five negative thought patterns, and the weapons you can arm yourself with to challenge them.
 
1. ‘I can’t’ or ‘I’m not good enough’
 
You always expect yourself to fail, whether it’s something new you’re trying or a task you’ve accomplished time and time again. As soon as you intend to start something, from an academic assignment to a new sport or a new project, your thought pattern tap drips into your brain.
 
It reminds you that you are useless, incompetent and generally incapable. Any motivation you once had is a thing of the past. You begin to feel deflated and unable to face the task.
 
This negative thought pattern is also connected with Imposter Syndrome, wherein you believe you’re incapable of performing the job others think you’re good at.
 
Challenge:
 
Fix this leak by reminding yourself of everything you HAVE accomplished. Grab a piece of paper and divide it into three sections. They each represent three phases of your life up to this point; you can label them as you wish.
 
In each section, list ALL of the things you accomplished during that phase in your life. Anything from cooking your first meal, doing well in school or sports, finishing a book, overcoming hardship, being a good friend, getting a job, decorating your room or house, picking up a new skill.
 
Next, condense this list into a new list of those things which made you feel most accomplished.
 
 
When this negative thought pattern comes back to haunt you, challenge it by re-reading both of these lists and re-living the feeling of accomplishment that accompanied each activity. This engages the rational part of your brain, presenting evidence that undermines your automatic thoughts.
 
Extra: keep a daily or weekly Accomplishment Journal in which you write a list of your accomplishments.
 
2. ‘Something terrible is going to happen’ or ‘Nothing good ever happens to me’ (Catastrophic Thinking)
 
You’re continually convinced something awful is going to happen to you, and that only terrible events take place in your life. It’s one of those negative thought patterns that are a tough nut to crack because, in many ways, it’s self-reinforcing. The more you let it control you, the more blinkered your perspective on life becomes.
 
You eventually notice, focus on and remember only the negative things that happen to you. You’ll obsess over all the instances when someone let you down; you had problems at work, didn’t succeed or failed to meet your goals. Even the small things like choosing the longest line at checkout or getting stopped at all the traffic lights will add to this negative picture of your life.
 
Your mind will gloss over, ignore and forget all the positive things. The times when there wasn’t a queue, when you hit all the green lights, when your hopes and expectations were exceeded, someone showed up for you, or you succeeded and met your goals.
Challenge:
 
Plug this leak by writing two lists. One list of everything in your life you are grateful for, that was entirely out of your control. That time the weather was perfect on your day off, or when you took a wrong turn and ended up somewhere beautiful, or a chance meeting that led to something wonderful.
 
Write another list of everything you are grateful for that was under your control (graduating, fitness, travelling, making connections).
 
 
Whenever this negative thought pattern overwhelms you with pessimism about your life, re-read your lists of gratitude. Remind yourself of everything you have been given, and everything you have provided for yourself. Using this evidence, challenge the notion that only bad things happen with concrete proof of every time something beautiful happened!
 
Extra: keep a daily or weekly Gratitude Journal in which you record all the good that is happening around you.
 
3. ‘I’m a burden on my loved ones’ and ‘No one actually loves me’
 
You feel that everyone in your life merely puts up with you. You have nothing to offer them – in fact, you’re probably burdensome and irritating to them. They hang out with you because they pity you, not because they actually like or love you.
 
This negative thought pattern can extend from colleagues and acquaintances to friends and family, Generally, it drips in whenever you feel a surge of affection for someone or feel very alone. It convinces you that you are unlovable and that others would be better off without you.
 
Challenge:
 
Sort out this leaky tap by writing three lists. One list of times people have been grateful to you, a list of what others have done for you, and compliments or good wishes you’ve received. It might take some digging, as your mind will resist the notion that any of the above actually happens. Sit through the struggle and write down anything you think of before your ego jumps in. Once you’ve written something down, don’t erase it!
 
Every time this negative thought pattern jumps the queue, challenge it by looking at this list and reminding yourself that you do bring positivity to the lives of those around you. The fact that they care about you is translated into gratefulness, actions on your behalf and positive sentiments regarding you.
 
This negative way of thinking prevents you from fully receiving the love, and gratitude others offer you. By challenging this negative thought pattern with evidence of the esteem and love that others have for you, you show yourself the truth: you are loved and valued.
 
 
Extra: keep a daily or weekly Receiving Journal in which you list all the gratefulness, compliments, positive sentiments and acts of service others offer you.
 
4. ‘The world wants to hurt me’ and ‘It’s not safe for me out there’
 
We are biologically programmed to pay close attention to the negative parts of our life since our survival is dependant on our emotional and physical wellbeing. However, a mind in the constant grip of fear detects threats quickly and everywhere, without necessarily differentiating between real or imaginary threats.
 
A speciality of the human brain is also to think in terms of emotional risks and emotional safety. While we may not be imminently eaten or killed, our brain perceives that certain people or circumstances are emotionally unsafe.
 
Those of us who struggle with anxiety have a mind that has become hardwired to recognise physical and emotional perils everywhere, which trigger a fight or flight response. This generally leads to feelings of victimisation and a desire to isolate ourselves from this unsafe world to avoid its many threats.
Challenge:
 
This negative thought pattern requires a two-fold response. Physically, we need to turn off the fight-or-flight response by re-centring our breathing. Make sure you’re breathing through your stomach, not your chest, and spend 2-5 minutes inhaling and exhaling deeply.
 
Using mindfulness, you can also centre your mind so it’s not panicking wildly about future threats. Still focussing on your breathing, list five things you can see, four things you can hear, three things you can smell and two things you can feel.
 
 
Emotionally, we need to to show our mind the evidence that the perceived threat is imaginary or not as significant is it thinks. The first step is to identify the source of our fear: what is making me feel unsafe?
 
Secondly, we can dismantle it, as objectively and compassionately as possible, to reveal the truth: it’s nothing more than we can handle. Write a list of every time you have previously faced this threat or something similar. This will challenge your mind to rationalise its reaction to the perceived menace.
 
If you are regularly overcome with a generalised fear of everything, the essential step is mindful breathing. Recall your mind to the present situation in which you are safe. Once your body is under your control, it’s easier to re-negotiate a positive thought loop with your mind.
 
5. ‘I don’t deserve anything (good)’ and ‘I’m ugly on the inside’
 
This is another tough one. Whenever something good happens to you, be it a promotion, winning a competition or requited love, your leaky thought pattern tap kicks off again. It persuades you that the good things coming your way are more than you deserve and if the world truly knew you, it would give you nothing.
 
Patterns like this one are the pillars of the negative thought process cycle. It robs you of your very right to own your worth, power and talent and receive the love that comes your way. It’s also linked to Imposter Syndrome, in that it convinces you that you are underserving of your place in the world. Everything good that comes your way must be based on an illusion.
Challenge:
 
Whenever this negative thought pattern drips in, write down what it is you are undeserving of. Then, force yourself to write down at least three reasons why you DO deserve it. This might feel forced, dishonest and borderline arrogant.
 
 
However, if you can write down at least three and then read them out loud to yourself until they feel natural, the whole process will become more comfortable. You’ll eventually come to believe yourself when you tell yourself why you deserve good things.
 
 
References:
  1. Dr. Mathieson, A., Clinical Psychologist, personal conversation
  2. Stanny, B., Sacred Success: A Course in Financial Miracles (2014)
  3. https://psychcentral.com


Valerie Soleil


 



 
About the Author: Valerie Soleil


Valerie Soleil is a writer with over 5 years of experience and holds a bachelor degree in law and a B.A. in Psychology. She is a physical & mental health enthusiast who constantly expands her knowledge about the mysteries of the human body and mind. Some of the activities Valerie is particularly passionate about are traveling and reading because they help her broaden her horizons.
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 

Archives:
 



 
A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 



 

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publicado por achama às 07:16
Domingo, 22 / 12 / 19

The Four Noble Truths in Buddhism and What They Can Teach You

By Valerie Soleil.

learning-mind.com.

Posted December 20th, 2019. 

 



The Four Noble Truths can be traced back to the teaching of Buddha, in fact, it is the main principle of Buddhism. Buddha was the first one to realize these truths and from there he spread the word to his followers. To understand Buddhism is to understand these truths.

Studying the Four Noble truths brings a level of knowledge that not many people can grasp. It takes patience and hard work to truly know these guidelines. It is essential we do not simply read these truths; we need to understand and live them in our everyday lives.

The Four Noble Truths


First Noble Truth


The First Noble Truth is dukkha orsuffering. However, it is not exactly easy to sum up. Dukkha can mean different things to different people. There isn’t an exact translation in the English language, which makes it difficult to pinpoint.

Many people have different ideas on what dukkha means. Most can agree that it incorporates feelings of stress, pain, loss, anxiety, dissatisfaction, and unhappiness. Since the term is so broad, it is important to fully understand this first noble truth in order to address it in your own personal life.

Essentially, dukkha is those lingering feelings of unhappiness, whether it be from stress, grief or other. Every single in the person in the world is affected by this sensation at one time or another.

Dukkha is a part of life and unfortunately, there is no way around it. The four noble truths aren’t about eliminating dukkha all together, but rather learning to manage it so you minimize your suffering.

When the Buddha introduced this truth, he did not want his followers to simply read it and move on, he wanted them to really sit and contemplate the existence of dukkha.


  • Why does it exist?
  • What purpose does it serve?
  • Is there meaning to it?

Most people don’t like to question this because they think that contemplating suffering will make them unhappy. But this is quite the opposite actually. The suffering will usually pass; however, it can be an opportunity to truly know yourself in times of grief which ultimately will give you a better understanding of the self.

There are many ways to experience dukkha. The obvious ways are through grief, anger, sadness or pain. It’s not until we really start to examine ourselves that we realize dukkha comes in many subtle forms; illness, envy, ageing, and small heartbreaks.

Many suffer from a sense of longing, perhaps for a better lover, body, or more money. This has just as much effect on us over time. It’s just not as obvious to our minds since our lives are filled with constant distractions. All of which are usually tied in with the source of suffering in the first place.

Second Noble Truth
The Second Noble Truth is the truth of the cause of dukkha or suffering. Suffering doesn’t just appear out of thin air, there are causes and conditions for every action. It is important to have a good understanding of the Buddhist principle of Karma in order to go further. If you are not familiar with the belief, please study these laws before reading any further.

The Buddha teaches that there are Three Poisons of the mind that we need to bring attention too. This will help you fully understand the Second Noble Truth.

The Three Poisons are:

  • Confusion
  • Cravings
  • Aversions

Any source of dukkha is manifested through one of these. We either live in the past by trying to hold on to a pleasant experience. Or we live in the future by idealizing a situation that hasn’t happened yet. Or we become deluded and detached from our current reality over an unpleasant situation.

We all crave something; it is human nature. We want to fit in, we want to be successful, we want a great love. While this is almost impossible to avoid, it is important to examine these thoughts as they pass by so that we don’t attach feelings of happiness to them.

When we desire something, we build up a fantasy situation in our head and when that situation doesn’t happen, we feel a strong sense of unhappiness and loss for something that never existed in the first place. This can cause so much suffering when left unchecked and most of the time people don’t even realize they are doing this.

Another cause of dukkha is the inability to comprehend these thought patterns. We know we feel sadness and stress but are not able to explain where it came from. Perhaps you are simply trying to have a positive outlook on life so you dream of better things to come. But in reality, that can sometimes hinder your mental health when your realities don’t line up with the thoughts in your head.

Third Noble Truth
Now before we start feeling down about our inevitable thought patterns, there is hope! The third Noble Truth teaches us the solution to dukkha or at least gives us hope for a cure. This Truth teaches us the cessation of suffering or dukkha.

Essentially, the solution to dukkha is to stop clinging to ideas and false realities. Sounds simple enough, right? Well, not exactly. One cannot simply will themselves to stop longing, it is impossible and will not work. You need to be able to fully let these feelings pass while being aware that they are happening and examine the source of them.

It’s important to understand that these cravings do not satisfy us, but rather they just lead to disappointment. If you can fully understand this, the sense of longing should be able to pass any importance.

The Third Noble Truth is an easy one to miss, indulging in fantasies (good or bad) comes as second nature to most and the point isn’t to eliminate these thoughts. These thoughts can be beneficial and are important for living a good life. If no one cared or looked to the future, it would be very hard to find the motivation to work toward life goals.

The point of the Third Truth is to recognize where these cravings come from. To really understand where the thoughts come from and not place feelings of happiness or unhappiness on those thoughts. They should be able to flow through your mind like water. This is the key to reaching enlightenment, becoming the master of your own mind. Situations are inevitable, it’s how you react to them that matters.
Fourth Noble Truth
The last and final Noble Truth is breaking the cycle of dukkha. If you can do this, you can truly reach Nirvana. Of course, this is much easier said than done. It takes entire lifetimes to fully understand and live these truths. It is a matter of living each moment in a state of mindfulness. You must commit to this path and walk it for your entire life, it must come as second nature.

The Fourth Noble Truth is the understanding that our thoughts shape our reality. You must be able to clear your mind, de-attach any feelings to thoughts, and walk the path of enlightenment. It will be very difficult at first and might not be achievable in this lifetime.


Essentially, you are re-training your mind and entire thought process. Not an easy thing to do. But eventually, it will become easier by developing a strong mind, solid virtues and gaining new wisdom as often as possible.
Final Thoughts

These ancient teachings are still very relevant today. We all have the power within us to walk this path and achieve enlightenment with a lot of hard work and discipline.

References:
www.bbc.co.uk
www.pbs.org




Valerie Soleil


 



 
About the Author: Valerie Soleil


Valerie Soleil is a writer with over 5 years of experience and holds a bachelor degree in law and a B.A. in Psychology. She is a physical & mental health enthusiast who constantly expands her knowledge about the mysteries of the human body and mind. Some of the activities Valerie is particularly passionate about are traveling and reading because they help her broaden her horizons.
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 

Archives:
 



 
A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com


 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 



 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 18:10
Quinta-feira, 19 / 12 / 19

What Do Dreams about Spiders Mean? 9 Possible Interpretations

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

December 17th, 2019.

 
DREAMS ABOUT SPIDERS.
 
 
 
Many of us suffer from arachnophobia, a fear of spiders, but what does it mean if you dream about them? Is it a sign you should be fearful in real life? Or could there be other possible explanations? Actually, dreams about spiders have several different meanings. In fact, there are some you might be quite surprised about.
 
Dreams about Spiders and What They Represent
 
Spiders represent many different qualities and ideals. Due to their industrious nature, they are associated with creativity. They are frightening and devious. In addition, they are also patient and some people even relate them to good fortune.
 
Here Are Nine Meanings behind Spider Dreams:
 
Powerful Feminine Force
 
We all know about the deadly black widow spider that eats the male after mating. In fact, spiders are a symbol of a strong feminine force. Spiders are associated with feminine traits of:
  • Patience
  • Receptivity
  • Creativity
 
The spider represents a powerful female in your life. That female could be you or someone in your family or circle of friends.
 
It is how you react to the spider that is particularly interesting. For example, if the spider terrified you that could be a sign that you are repressing your feminine side. Or that you feel threatened by a powerful female in your midst.
 
If the spider didn’t bother you, or you were not bothered by the spider, this indicates a positive increase in feminine energy around you.
 
Patience
 
Spiders weave webs and then lie in wait for their prey to stumble into them. Spiders take lots of time and care to create intricate webs to catch their prey. Therefore, a dream about spiders could suggest that you need to be more patient with a particular situation in your life.
 
Feeling trapped
 
Spider’s webs are designed and made to catch prey. As such, your dream about spiders could be your subconscious telling you that you feel trapped. Are there any situations in your life that you feel like you want to escape? Are family or work pressures getting to you? Talk to someone and share your fears.
 
Manipulation
 
However, a spider’s web is also associated with lying and manipulation.
 
 
“O, what a tangled web we weave when first we practise to deceive!” Walter Scott
 
Therefore, watching a spider spin its web can suggest two things. First, that you are being manipulated or that you’re the one doing the manipulating. You should take a careful look at your life. Second, is someone trying to fool you or trick you? Or, are you trying to get one over on someone in your life?
 
Fearful Anxieties
 
Of course, for most people, the thought of a big, fat hairy spider is enough to scare them. There really isn’t any other animal, insect or creature that causes such a universal fear in us. So a spider that appears in a dream could be a sign of hidden anxieties. This is especially true if the spider was hanging over you, dangling in your way. This type of dream indicates someone you are trying to avoid but can’t get away from.
 
Furthermore, a spider dream can also be your subconscious asking you to dig deep and find the cause of your real fear in real life. If the spider was crawling on you, then the spider is definitely a negative force. The spider represents negative things in your life that you are trying to rid yourself from. These can be people, habits or addictions.
 
Prosperity
 
I have to add another – however. This is because a dangling spider is also a symbol of good luck and fortune. The tiny little spiders we use to twirl around our heads three times are even called ‘money spiders’.
 
Consequently, a dream about spiders, in general, can be a good sign. In fact, if you look up spiders in dream dictionaries, you’ll quite often see that they are a good omen.
 
Creativity
 
The beautiful and intricate webs I talked about earlier are wonderful, natural creations. It takes great skill and endeavours to produce these marvels of nature. Therefore, a spider in your dream doesn’t have to be a negative or frightening sign. Actually, it could point to a period of intense creativity in your life.
 
To understand how this sign of creativity relates to your life, examine closely the structure of the web itself. For instance, is it strong with lots of detail? Is it big and impressive or a bit sad-looking? Will it stand up to the forces of nature? Or, is it wispy and fragile? Does it look weak and unable to support itself?
 
These details will give you clues about how you feel about your creative endeavour. And, more importantly, whether you need to make an extra effort if you want to fulfil your dreams.
 
Betrayal
 
There are certain scenarios within dreams about spiders that you should be wary of. For example, if the spider bit you, or it was poisonous and attacking you. These are signs of a major betrayal in your life. Also, spider bites also indicate a bad relationship that you need to act on quickly. Or it could be a sign there is a toxic person (usually female) in your life.
 
Progress
 
Spiders are hardworking. They toil for hours to make the webs to catch their food. As a result, if you saw a spider climbing in your dream it is a sign you are moving in the right direction. Your dreams about spiders are showing you that you’re making good progress with your endeavours.
Final thoughts
 
Spiders are scary in real life. But we can see that this doesn’t necessarily mean that you should be scared if your dream featured spiders. Examine the context of your dream and you’ll find the true meaning.
 
References:

  1. www.bustle.com
  2. www.elitedaily.com
  3. www.huffingtonpost.co.uk
 

 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


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publicado por achama às 04:30
Segunda-feira, 02 / 12 / 19

What Do Dreams about Sharks Mean? Scenarios and Interpretations

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

December 1st, 2019.

 
DREAMS ABOUT SHARKS.
 
 
 
Sharks. Denizens of the deep. Fearsome predators. Sharks have a negative association in real life. Just two bars of music from Jaws conjures up the image of that terrifying mouth of razor-sharp teeth rising from the ocean. So what do dreams about sharks mean?
 
Does the presence of a shark in your dream indicate a threat in real life? Is it, therefore, a warning to be careful? But we often swim with sharks so it is a signal to be more daring? Let’s first look at what sharks in dreams represent. Then we can interpret various scenarios.
 
Dreams about Sharks
 
What Emotions Do Sharks Represent?
 
Sharks are associated with several emotions:
  • Fear
  • Coldness
  • Ruthlessness
  • Fear
 
The obvious emotion is fear. Sharks are predators. They are at the top of the food chain. Sharks are masters of the kill. As such, there is nothing that can kill a shark. The thing about a dream with sharks is that they feel so frightening. When we think about sharks in real life we picture that ominous black tail fin, gliding through the sea. It is waiting for the opportune moment to strike.
 
Likewise, we think of those distinctive rows of pointed teeth, sticking out from a yawning mouth. So dreams about sharks are nearly always associated with fear or the threat of something.
 
Coldness
 
Sharks are also known for being cold. Those cold, blank, dead eyes are emotionless. Even during a bloody feeding frenzy. They remain impassive and detached. Sharks are a bit like the Terminator. You cannot reason with them. And they absolutely will not stop, until you are dead.
 
Ruthlessness
 
Like the Terminator analogy, sharks are savage, ruthless killers. They will pursue their prey for miles to get a kill. Or they will wait patiently for the opportune moment. But whatever happens, they’ll never give up.
 
Now we have a basic understanding about dreams with sharks, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty of what they actually mean.
 
Animals in dreams have particular importance. As a result, we need to examine them carefully. Sometimes the animal represents you, the dreamer. Other times it can be a symbol of family or friends. The type of animal is obviously, very important.
 
Sharks as People in Your Lives
 
The Shark Represents You
 
 
 
Water, particularly underwater, is associated with our subconscious. Therefore, it stands to reason that dreams about fish or creatures, such as sharks, that live underwater also relate to deeply-entrenched thoughts and emotions.
 
However, dreaming about a shark doesn’t necessarily mean you are a cold, ruthless person. In actual fact, it could signify that you have unresolved issues or fears that you’ve pushed down. Consequently, these are now resurfacing and need dealing with.
 
In contrast, consider the scenario where people swim with sharks as a personal challenge. Your subconscious mind is connecting the shark with something you are afraid of and asking you to face it.
 
As sharks have a pretty negative association, a dream about one could also indicate a negative part of your identity. None of us likes to admit we may have character flaws. Therefore, it’s likely that we’ve either buried them or haven’t acknowledged them. Your dream is prodding you. It’s saying that you need to recognise that you are not perfect.
 
For instance, you might have anger issues, a bad temper, or act in a coercive-controlling way with a partner. Either way, the shark in your dream is all about getting you to be more enlightened about yourself.
 
The Shark Is Someone in Your Life
 
Negativity is the game here. So what are the major characteristics of the shark? Well, we know they exact fear, they are cold and ruthless. But there’s another aspect in dreams about sharks, and that’s greed.
 
Sharks symbolise greed. They are gluttonous creatures with an insatiable appetite. Dreaming about sharks is a signal that you feel drained by someone close to you. This draining feeling can either be in an emotional or financial way. But whichever way it is, the person who is represented by the shark in your dream is after something that you have. Furthermore, they don’t care who it upsets or affects.
 
Dream Scenarios about Sharks
 
 
You saw a shark: This is a symbol of your own ruthlessness, greed and cold-blooded nature in real life.
 
You saw a shark fin: A fin of a shark is a warning in a dream as it is in real life. Be careful, there are difficult times ahead.
 
The shark was in a pool or aquarium: You have strong sexual desires that are not being fulfilled right now. Time to accept who you are.
 
You were a shark: You have the qualities of a shark, i.e. you are ruthless and tend to get what you want. This dream is suggesting that you could be more sensitive.
 
You came across a dead shark: You’ll overcome any enemies and outwit those who try to deceive you.
 
You killed a shark: It is time to end a bad relationship. You have the control.
 
You caught a shark: Face up to a difficult problem quickly and you will overcome it.
 
A shark attacked you: This is not a good omen, it signifies an accident-prone period or a time of ill-health.
 
The shark bit your leg off: You should think very carefully before making major decisions.
 
The shark bit off your hand or arm: Be watchful of your colleagues, they may not have your best interests at heart.
 
The shark swallowed your whole body: You feel powerless in real life. You need to think laterally to solve the problems.
 
You fought the shark and survived: You will need to fight in real life but you will succeed.
 
You ate a shark: You have a lot of negative emotions and aggression inside. Time to get help so you can release them in a healthy manner.
 
Final Thoughts
 
Dreams about sharks can feel terrifying at the time. But they can also reveal a huge amount of information. So, take your time, think about the dream and use it to move forward in your life.
 
References:

 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 02:47
Sexta-feira, 29 / 11 / 19

Why Is Intrapersonal Intelligence Important and How to Develop It?

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

November 28th, 2019.

 


 
 
In the 1980s, a brand-new theory on intelligence emerged. Developed by Howard Gardner, this theory suggested that there is more than just the one version of intelligence. Instead of the typical IQ test, based on logic and numbers, there are several ways in which a person could be intelligent. These new types of intelligence include linguistic, spatial, musical, inter and intrapersonal.
 
Psychologists had developed this new theory, known as the Multiple Intelligence Theory, based on the idea that being intelligent shouldn’t be limited to a person’s ability to do math or science alone. A person could be incredibly intelligent in all kinds of ways.
 
What Is Intrapersonal Intelligence?
 
A person with intrapersonal intelligence is skilled at looking inwards and understanding themselves. They tend to be more aware of their own feelings, their triggers, and solutions than others are.
 
If you are able to analyze your own behavior and thoughts and understand why it is that you feel certain ways, you could be intrapersonally intelligent. A person who has intrapersonal intelligence is usually easily self-motivated and doesn’t require inspiration from the external world to be productive.
 
If you enjoy being alone, you might have intrapersonal intelligence. Instead of fearing being alone with their thoughts, someone with this intelligence would thrive because they are comfortable with their own being. Being able to understand what has caused your feelings or impulse reactions is a highly intelligent skill to have.
 
Why Is Intrapersonal Intelligence Important?
 
This type of intelligence is essential to living at peacewith yourself. If you’re constantly jumping through emotions, reacting with no idea why and feeling totally unaware of your true self, you’re probably not at peace. “Blissfully unaware” only applies if you’re so detached from yourself that you don’t feel much at all.
 
To be truly content, you’ll need to develop your intrapersonal intelligence.
 
Self-Motivation
 
Some of the most fundamental life skills are self-motivation and self-discipline. These things come naturally to people who are intrapersonally intelligent.
 
We all know the struggle that is forcing yourself to sit down and get some work done, but those with this type of intelligence find it much easier. They don’t rely on external forces, deadlines or pressure to get things done. They are able to connect with themselves enough to create motivation to get started and discipline to get finished.
 
Without intrapersonal intelligence, you’re likely to coast along hoping the work just goes away because you lack the drive to succeed for your own satisfaction.
 
Self-Esteem
 
Intrapersonal intelligence also includes having better self-esteem than most. Not over-confidence, but a stable self-belief and comfort within one’s self. When you know yourself as a friend would, you learn to appreciate your flaws and are better adapted to working on them.
 
Self-awareness and being self-assured will help you to navigate life’s difficulties much easier too. If you aren’t in touch with your inner thoughts, then you’re far more likely to fly off the handle at minor inconveniences and major disruptions alike. A person with intrapersonal intelligence is likely to reflect rather than react when life comes bumpy.
 
When people with this skill become angered or upset, they will have the ability to control their reactions and think rather than lash out. They will be better able to keep themselves calm during trying times because of an awareness of their own needs. If they need to leave, they will. If they need to communicate, they’ll do it with a cool head and be more successful in getting what they want.
 
Brilliant minds like Albert Einstein and Virginia Woolf are known to have been intrapersonally intelligent. By being mindful of their own thoughts and calm in the face of difficulties, they were able to achieve incredible goals.
 
How to Develop Intrapersonal Intelligence?
 
If you aren’t the type to have natural intrapersonal intelligence, you can still develop it yourself. It’s a skill that can be learned to help improve your life and mental wellbeing. There are all kinds of ways to practice getting in touch with your inner self.
Writing
 
The most often recommended way to practice your intrapersonal intelligence is to keep a journal. Writing allows you to talk to yourself in a way you might struggle to do in your own mind. When you have feelings, good or bad, try writing about them in your own private notebook.
 
You could even write as if you were having a conversation with a friend. Tell them about how you feel and consider all the possible causes, it’s highly likely that you’ll start to unfold your own mind.
 
After a while of practicing writing in a healthy voice, you might find that it becomes your own inner voice too. Ultimately, this is the most key part of intrapersonal intelligence to develop. It’ll allow you to access parts of your mind that you usually leave to your subconscious and stay more in control.
 
Meditation
 
You can also try meditation or meditative activities such as yoga, walking or running. These things are all encouraged to help you clear your mind of the clutter and access your real feelings.
 
They allow you to develop intrapersonal intelligence by quieting the noise and letting you slow down. Slowing down your thoughts prevents you from reacting too quickly and promotes your connection with your true needs.
 
Through meditative activities, we can learn more about ourselves and let go of the nonsensewe’ve been carrying. Consider these quiet times as an opportunity to chat with yourself. Like getting to know a new person, you would need a peaceful place to be in the present and share. When you let your mind be peaceful, your conscious voice can chat with your inner needs.
 
Disconnect
 
If you want to get to know yourself, remove influences from the outside world. Our phones, tv screens, computers, they all fill our minds. Instead of avoiding silence by staying constantly connected, try switching off. When you’re left in the quiet, you’ll find it much easier to reconnect to yourself and listen to your own thoughts.
 
Being intrapersonally intelligent allows a person to think clearer and more independently. It promotes inner wisdom and better management of your emotions. No more spontaneous tears or easily triggered anger. Disconnect from the world and the noise around you and you’ll find it easier to set goals and achieve them.
 
References:

Becky Storey
 

 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 09:02
Quarta-feira, 20 / 11 / 19

4 Self-Love Exercises to Practice Daily That Will Help You Accept Yourself

Lauren Edwards-Fowle.

learning-mind.com

Posted November 19, 2019.

 

 

We live in a world of exhaustive personal analysis and constant comparisons. As a result, it is more important than ever to dedicate time to reinforce a positive relationship with yourself and your body. This is where self-love exercises can be beneficial.
Why Is Self-Love Important?
The tone of your internal thoughts and the way in which you communicate with yourself are important. In the first place, they dictate the way in which you relate to the wider world. Secondly, they determine your emotional ability to manage challenging situations.

Therefore, it is essential to create a peaceful, optimistic and creative atmosphere in your own mindset. This allows you to empower yourself to feel capable, and at harmony with your body.
4 Self-Love Exercises

Here are four self-love exercises which you can practise in the comfort of your own home. These exercises will help you begin a journey of self-love and self-acceptance, as well as general harmony and peace. Or to continue your pathway to finding true self-love.
1. Affirmations
Affirmations are a powerful and acknowledged way to create a positive relationship with yourself. Furthermore, they can help set the tone for the day ahead.

There are many different affirmation styles. For example, ones you can adapt to target any challenges you may be dealing with. On the other hand, you can use them to help create the tone and positivity you need to manage a particular task. This might be a job interview or a situation that may be causing feelings of anxiety.

To practise affirmations, you can adopt verbal affirmations, write them down, or join these with a stance to reinforce the message. The practice is to affirm a statement or mindset which you wish to adopt. Then repeat the message to yourself in a peaceful environment. This is so you can absorb the message you are delivering.
These could include statements such as:
I am enough. This is a powerful affirmation to banish self-doubt. It will establish in your subconscious that you have the tools and resources to meet your challenges.
I can…. achieve this/succeed. This is a useful affirmation when facing a challenge or obstacle. It helps to communicate that you are capable of your goal.

Physical affirmation stances are a way of reinforcing the message you are delivering to yourself. This could be any stance that makes you feel powerful. In other words, a positive self-love exercise that allows you to combine your emotional wellbeing with a physically powerful posture.
Examples of affirmation stances include:
Superman/superwomen stance: standing tall, chin held high, arms on hips or raised above your held.
Power stance: chest held proud, chin high, standing to your full height.

Physical affirmations work well in front of a mirror and repeating verbally your affirmation message. Combine these with a stance helps to deliver the affirming and positive message throughout your mind and body.

Written affirmations are another form of affirmation as a self-love exercise. You could try leaving a message somewhere you are likely to see it often. For example, on the front door or the cooker. So each time you leave the house or cook a meal you are affirming to honour yourself with healthy dietary habits.

2. Keeping a journal
Writing a journal is one of the simplest, yet most effective self-love exercises. It helps in various ways:
You can track your emotions and challenges.
It allows you to identify situations or dynamics which trigger negative feelings or responses.
You can also engage with the positivity you have experienced every day.

With busy lives, we all often forget to take note of the small positives. As such, taking the time to note all the good things which have happened in a day can be uplifting. It is a good way to help engage with positive memories on one of our more difficult days.

With this in mind, take the time to read back through a journal each week. Then we can see how all the positives reinforces our perception of how much happiness is around us if we only stop to take note.

Choose a journal in any format which you are most comfortable with. This might take the form of making notes on your mobile phone, it might be written down by hand – whatever you choose. Remember, writing in your journal is intended to be something just for you. Therefore, it should be a true and honest account of your experiences to allow you to reflect.

Your journal could be a design that speaks to you with an image, colour or pattern. Something you find soothing, creative, or which makes you smile.

Try writing down one positive thing every day. It could be as small as hearing a bird singing, a stranger smiling at you in a shop, or someone stopping to let you out of a junction. All these small positives add up to a greater understanding of the energies surrounding us.
3. Physical exercise
Physical exercise provides multiple benefits to our wellbeing. It is beneficial both physically and mentally. It doesn’t matter whether you take up gentle yoga, low impact swimming, or a more intensive form of exercise. Any form of exercise is an excellent tool in practising self-love.

Physical exercise is beneficial in many ways:
It can help you to appreciate what your body can do.
Of what your body is capable of achieving.
You can set small goals and challenges for yourself.
You can feel positive about your achievements.
It can also open up opportunities to engage in a social setting with other people.
You’ll form a sense of community around an exercise that you enjoy.

Endorphins are chemicals released in our bodies during exercise and are a powerful way of alleviating anxiety. However, some people do not feel comfortable exercising in a group setting. Or they find the idea of practising physical self-love exercises challenging. If this is you, you could try a low impact exercise such as yoga. You do not need any specialist equipment for it and you can practise in your own home.
Yoga is a peaceful and low impact way of connecting with yourself.

Moreover, it is probably one of the best self-love exercises as it aligns the emotional and physical aspects of our being.

There are many videos and guides online which can help with ideas of poses to try, and showing different exercise options available. So, if you are new to physical exercise there are plenty of resources and guides to help you get started. The exercise you choose should be scaled to your abilities and be something that you enjoy and find a positive experience.

The goals you set yourself can be simple. For example, swimming an extra length, or learning a new pose. These are objectives that you can scale to your abilities and physical strengths. Then you’ll be able to experience the joy of learning something new and meeting a personal target. Noting these successes in your journal is a great way to practise self-love and be able to remind yourself of all you can achieve.
4. Alone time

Alone time can mean many things; meditating, taking a bath, reading a book, drinking a cup of tea, or simply being still and mindful. Meditation is an excellent self-love exercise. In addition, it is an exceptional way to connect with your inner dialogue. You can stop and take time to exist in a meaningful state of being, present in the time and moment.

Any form of alone time is a time of peace, self-reflection. It is a time which you set aside for yourself to exist in your own being without any interruptions or interactions with the outside world. Taking some time to reflect, consider your day, and listen to your emotions.

Understand how you are feeling at that moment is a powerful process for generating self-love. Then, giving yourself the time and attention you require to ensure you are responding to your own needs.

Often nature is the ideal environment for mindful alone time. For instance, sitting in a quiet outdoor space and listening to the sounds of nature around you. Try finding somewhere quiet, neither too hot nor too cold. Then, shut your eyes, and ask yourself how you feel at that moment.

There is no ‘best’ way to spend time with yourself but creating space for your inner dialogue acknowledges you as a person. Furthermore, it is a great way to show yourself self-love.
Final Thoughts

You could argue that all the above self-love exercises are beneficial in their own ways. But perhaps the best way we exercise self-love is simply to be kind to ourselves.

References:
 
Lauren Edwards-Fowle
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 

 

 
About the Author: Lauren Edwards-Fowle

 
Lauren Edwards-Fowle is a professional copywriter based in South East England. Lauren worked within Children's Services for five years before moving into the business sector. She holds an MSc in Applied Accountancy and BSc in Corporate Law. She now volunteers within the community sport sector, helping young people to live healthier, more productive lifestyles and overcome the barriers to inclusion that they face. With a keen interest in physical wellbeing, nutrition and sports, Lauren enjoys participating in a variety of team sports in her spare time, as well as spending time with her young family and their dog Scout.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 09:52
Sexta-feira, 01 / 11 / 19

How Radical Acceptance Can Help You Get Through Life’s Challenges

By Sherrie Hurd.

learning-mind.com.

November 1st, 2019.

 
radical acceptance.


 
There’s nothing wrong with relentlessly chasing after your dreams. But sometimes you have to practice radical acceptance.
 
There are books, presentations, and workshops that help us learn how to chase our dreams and reach certain goals. We are taught to never give up, for the most part. But there comes a time when everything we do or say cannot change a situation. We cannot control everything in our lives, no matter how hard we try.
 
Learning Radical Acceptance
 
There are many examples of how radical acceptance works. Sometimes, you’ve had to endure a form of abuse, and it was extremely painful, whether it was physical or mental. Over the years after the incident, you’ve gone through so much pain and struggled with issues and triggers.
 
First of all, you have to accept that the thing happened. It’s not that you’re accepting what they did to you, it’s just that you’re accepting the event occurred and helping yourself to move on from the heartache. It’s the same with infidelity, or losing a job, it hurts, but it’s already done. You have to find a way to go from that point to the next part of your life.
 
Yes, there’s this thing called radical acceptance, and it’s not something that always comes easy to us. In fact, it’s the opposite of pressing hard toward something that never seems to work. As most people are screaming “Don’t give up!”, there’s an acceptance blooming in the back of your head, and it’s covered with pain. It’s the pain of what we consider failure.
 
This sort of acceptance comes from failed attempts at different forms of success, like sports, for instance. You may keep pushing yourself to run faster than your opponent, but at some point, you may have to accept he’s just a faster runner. Maybe you can catch up and maybe you won’t.
A different look at radical acceptance
 
But radical acceptance isn’t a failure. It’s more like having the maturity to understand that not everything in this world can be controlled just so you can live a dream or reach a goal. And sometimes we create an end goal in our heads.
 
We see what we want to happen and we make this thought an absolute, meaning, we’re unwilling to have it any other way. That is what causes much of the pain and struggles we go through when we cannot accept a different way of life.
 
Of course, it doesn’t help when we live with someone who always seems to cause problems on a daily basis. Accepting their behavior can be difficult, and definitely hard to accept no matter how mature we are.
 
Sometimes, in severe circumstances, we have to distance ourselves from these people in order to take away the constant day to day struggles they seem to cause.
 
What happens when we resist change
 
When we refuse to accept something that goes against what we want, we resist. This resistance is the thing that causes suffering. When we lose someone we love, no, we don’t have to be okay with it, but we do have to accept it.
 
Otherwise, we will suffer from much longer than we should. We are actually resisting the very nature of death, and you know this is a losing battle.
What happens when we accept the “unacceptable”?
 
Just because we accept the “unacceptable” doesn’t mean we approve of what’s happening. Don’t ever let anyone tell you that you’ve agreed with something just because you don’t fight it tooth and nail. Maybe they choose to fight until all their hair falls out, but radical movements where we accept reality can keep us sane.
 
When we’re finally able to accept our circumstances and the fact that some factors absolutely cannot be changed, we open up a new avenue of thought. We open up the acceptance of the change.
 
If you’re anything like me, you’re not really fond of change. But with this change, there are different routes that spring up, and various ideas you may have never considered.
So, how do we practice radical acceptance?
 
Truth be told, this process may take a while for you to get used to. Very few of us want to accept what we don’t like. However, it takes accepting three important realities – the past, the present, and the future. We must accept what has happened and be at peace with that fact.
 
We must accept our present situation and do our best to live the life we deserve, but sometimes in acceptance. As far as the future goes, we shouldn’t guess.
 
 
We cannot know what the future brings and we shouldn’t make promises we possibly might break, we shouldn’t plan for things so much that we leave little room for change, and we should never take charge of the future of someone else’s life either.
 
When taking on radical acceptance, we should understand that although our circumstances may not be the way we like them, we can learn a way to honor the way they are. I think accepting some things in our lives can be just as fulfilling as fighting toward what we want. Again, like many things in life, it requires a healthy balance.
 
References:
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Sherrie Hurd.

 

 





 

About the Author: Sherrie Hurd


Sherrie Hurd is a professional writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She is an advocate for mental health awareness and nutrition. Sherrie studied Psychology, Journalism, and Fine Arts, receiving an Associates in Marketing. She has written for Beacon, a southern college publication, and is an author of a full-length non-fiction novel. Sherrie spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 



 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
Free counters!

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publicado por achama às 17:13
Quarta-feira, 30 / 10 / 19

What Is Overgeneralization? How It’s Impairing Your Judgment and How to Stop It

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

October 29, 2019.



 
Overgeneralization is a common way of thinking which is rarely referred to by its real name but is done by almost everyone. Most of us do it at least a little. But some of us allow ourselves to dive so deep into overgeneralizing almost everything that our mental health is at stake. We do this every time we jump to the conclusion that one bad thing equals only bad things in future.
 
Overgeneralization is a kind of cognitive distortion. If you overgeneralize, this means you tend to assume one event is representative of something in its entirety. It is similar to catastrophizing.
 
Examples of Overgeneralization
 
For example, if a person once sees a dog being loud and aggressive, they might assume that all dogs are equally as dangerous and decides to avoid them all. In this scenario, the person is overgeneralizing what dogs are really like. This is how most fears are developed – from overgeneralizing after one difficult experience.
 
Dating and your romantic life are often victims of your overgeneralizing thoughts. If you go on one date with a man and he turns out to be an awful and rude person, you might overgeneralize and conclude that all men are just as terrible. As a result, you will struggle to let anyone close to you again.
 
By jumping so such huge, dramatic conclusions, you could be damaging all your future prospects in a whole variety of ways, from romance to your career, friends and even your family. If you convince yourself that “all” of something is bad or wrong, you’ll be cutting off huge chunks of your life.
 
Overgeneralization can be simple in day to day life and not too disruptive though. For example, when you assume that because you once disliked a mushroom-based meal, you’ll never like anything mushroom related at all.
 
These sorts of things aren’t too problematic and tend to create the simple biases we have which dictate our likes and dislikes. However, certain situations can’t afford to be overgeneralized. That’s because they have such a profound effect on your mental health, especially anxiety and depression.
 
Overgeneralizing Yourself
 
If you suffer from low self-esteem, you’re probably upsettingly familiar with overgeneralization. Many of us have moments where we assume far too quickly and let small occurrences affect our overall perceptions. But some people struggle with overgeneralization on a far more personal level and with much more serious consequences on our wellbeing.
 
By jumping to conclusions about ourselves, we tend to limit our potential. Wed reduce our chances of a full, happy life. Overgeneralizing impairs your judgment and your view of the world around you. Is it familiar to you to hear these words from your inner critic? “I always fail” or “I’ll never be able to do that”. If it is, you’re probably suffering from the effects of low self-esteem as a result of overgeneralization.
 
If you’ve tried at something and failed, you’re more likely to be worried about trying again. But there’s a difference between being worried and being certain you simply can’t do it.
 
Failure is normal and even necessary in the pursuit of a dream. But by overgeneralizing, you might allow yourself to think that you’re always going to fail at anything you try in future.
 
This kind of impaired judgment isn’t fair on yourself. And you owe it to yourself to work on stopping this way of thinking. One failure means nothing in the grand scheme of things. One rejection, one slip-up, even many of them, they don’t mean a thing!
 
How to Stop Overgeneralization
 
As you have seen, overgeneralizing can be so damaging to your mental health and your life as a whole. So it’s clearly very important that we work out how to stop this and get ahead of it before it harms your future too much.
 
Remember that nothing is absolute
 
The single most important thing you can do for yourself when you struggle with overgeneralization is to constantly remind yourself that every experience is unique, and nothing is guaranteed by the past.
 
Even J.K Rowling was rejected numerous times before Harry Potter was finally accepted and published. She knew that “some” didn’t mean “all” – and we all know how well that worked out for her. Just because you did one thing wrong, or even a number of things wrong, there’s no reason to believe things will always be that way. You can learn, you can grow, your luck can change.
 
Watch how you talk to yourself
 
To stop overgeneralizing, you also ought to take more notice of the words you use towards yourself. When using negative self-talk, we tend to make huge sweeping statements which are never true. We say things like “I’ll never be good at this”, “I’ll always be a loser”, “Everybody thinks I’m a loser”. And none of those would be true on a small scale, and definitely aren’t true on a large scale.
 
Consider the phrase “Nobody will ever love me”. Most of us have said this line in our darker moments. But this statement excludes the friends and family we have, who do love us. This happens because we’re hyper-focused on what romantic love we don’t have. These sweeping statements are incorrect and take one small thought and apply it to our entire life.
 
This is terrible for our mental health and should be stopped. Try to avoid using words like never, always, everyone and nobody. These words allow you to apply a giant overgeneralization to a small experience. And this will inevitably impair your judgment of yourself and the world around you.
 
Nothing is that widespread and nothing is that final. When you give yourself a chance to see life that way, you’ll feel much better in yourself.
 
Optimism is key
 
Be open to the idea that not everything is all bad. Overgeneralization tends to be used for negative thoughts, allowing yourself to make those bad feelings even worse. Be optimistic that things can and will change and that the past does not dictate your future.
 
Becky Storey
 
 

 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

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publicado por achama às 16:43
Sábado, 13 / 07 / 19

Naikan Reflection: How This Japanese Technique Transforms Your Relationships ~ Francesca F.

Naikan Reflection: 

How This Japanese Technique Transforms Your Relationships.

By Francesca F.

July 12th, 2019

 
 

 

Naikan Reflection helps us to better understand ourselves and others in our various relationships.
Relationships are complicated, and it is always easier to focus on the bad parts than the good. Naikan Reflection is a form of genuine self-reflection which aims to help us understand our relationships better.

By understanding the bigger picture, we can see the nuances of a relationship. Most significantly, you may find yourself recognizing cycles of negative behavior, or having a greater respect for what others do for you.

What Is Naikan Reflection?

Naikan Reflection is a structured method of self-reflection which helps us to get a more realistic sense of our relationships with others. It was developed by Japanese businessman and devoted Jodo Shinshu Buddhist, Yoshimoto Ishin.

Those who practice it claim that it helps them to understand themselves and others with who they have relationships.
The Three Questions of Naikan Reflection

Naikan Reflection is based on three key questionswhich help us to reflect on our relationships with others, from friends to family, co-workers to acquaintances.
  1. What have I received from…?
  2. What have I given to…?
  3. What troubles and difficulties have I caused…?
There is a logical fourth question in this series which is ‘What troubles and difficulties have… caused me?’ This question was purposefully ignored because of the belief that this question is responsible for too much misery in daily life.
One of the most important aspects of Naikan Reflection is that it assumes we are all naturally good at seeing an answer to this fourth question. In contrast, true knowledge comes from a little introspection.

Three Different Methods to Practice Naikan Reflection

The general method of practicing Naikan Reflection is to answer these questions in detail.
  • Examine first what you have received from others.
There are times we receive things from others without understanding the sacrifices they made or the thought they gave it. Take the time to understand this and to whom you should be grateful.
  • Next, consider what you have given to others.
We are all susceptible to self-criticism. Taking the time to understand how you are capable of helping others can change our perception of ourselves.
As a result, this is a valuable tool because it helps to boost self-esteem and change our mindset. When we see the good in what we have done without making a conscious effort, we can see the good we are capable of in the future.
  • The final question is not the easiest to answer.
We never like to point fingers at ourselves; doing so can be difficult. Yet, we must understand the hardships we have caused others to truly be introspective. When we see what difficulties we have caused others, we can begin to understand and even repair those relationships.
There are three main ways Naikan Reflection can be practiced, so you can find the right method for you.

Daily Naikan (Nichijo Naikan)

Daily Naikan Reflection takes only 20 to 30 minutes before falling asleep. Sit in a quiet place and minimize distractions. Consider the three questions of Naikan and answer them in relation to the events of the day.
Try to be as specific as you can rather than generalize about ‘receiving food’ or ‘gave assistance.’ It may seem trivial, but it is important to recognize what you should be grateful for and what you offer others.
This method is the simplest. It also keeps the self-reflection we do present in our daily lives.

Naikan Reflection on a Person

Naikan Reflection can be done in reference to a specific person. This method takes a little longer because it focuses on the entire relationship, beginning to end. Start with how you met, and slowly work your way through the ups and downs of the relationship chronologically.
Naikan Reflection on a person gives us greater insight and respect for a particular person. You may focus on a few weeks, or a few years, giving yourself a detailed account of hard times with the gift of hindsight.
You will be able to see how the relationship has strengthened or may be weakened. However, you will be able to see the situation as a whole.

A Naikan Retreat (Schuchu Naikan)

Naikan Retreats can be a scheduled event, or it can be something you venture to do alone. Taking yourself away for a set amount of time to a quiet and secluded place can be mind-opening.
Venture to a peaceful and private spot and give yourself nothing to do but reflect. View your life chronologically and assess all of your relationships in turn.
This is the most intense version of self-reflection and it can take some time to work up to this. However, those who take part in such retreats have profound and life-changing experiences. What is important is that you are sincere and committed to the experience.

Why self-reflection is important

Self-reflection is deeply entrenched in many of the world’s spiritual cultures. There are many different methods of self-reflection which can help open your mind to all that life is.
Naikan Reflection is simply one of many of these methods, but it helps us to form closer bonds through the understanding of our relationships.
Most importantly, practicing this reflection helps us to recognize the importance of others and the positive impact we can have in the lives of others.
References:
  1. https://minds.wisconsin.edu
  2. https://oxfordre.com

 

 

  1.  

 

 

 

 

About the Author: Francesca F.

Francesca is a freelance writer currently studying a degree in Law and Philosophy. She has written for several blogs in a range of subjects across Lifestyle, Relationships and Health and Fitness. Her main pursuits are learning new innovative ways of keeping fit and healthy, as well as broadening her knowledge in as many areas as possible in order to achieve success.
 
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 
Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
 
 

 
No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 
 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 22:44
Sexta-feira, 12 / 07 / 19

5 Examples of Herd Mentality and How to Avoid Falling into It ~ Sherrie.

5 Examples of Herd Mentality and How to Avoid Falling into It.

By Sherrie.

July 11th, 2019

 
 
 
It’s easy to fall into the herd mentality without even thinking. Following the leader isn’t always good.
People may not be animals, but they still often exhibit a herd mentality. What this means is they tend to congregate in groups to perform certain objectives or uphold common beliefs. There are ways that herd mentality can benefit us in the short term, I will not lie, but there are also reasons why we should avoid this train of thought altogether.


Unlike mob mentality

Individuals who operate in herds are different than those who contribute to mobs. Mobs are often seen as violent or aggressive groups. Being in a herd is basically being a part of the “in crowd” or adhering to a majority mentality. We see this in religious organizations and school affiliations.
Here are examples and explanations of the herd mentality.

1. Black Friday
I’m starting with one of the largest global phenomena in recent times – Black Friday. If there was ever a more moldable herd of people, it would be this group. Every year, on Thanksgiving day and the weekend following, Black Friday hits most retail stores and online sites offering ridiculous discounts in pricing.

When this happens, people go mad. More and more individuals are following the masses into this hysterical mode of shopping. Following the leader has never been so massive, and it doesn’t seem like it’s going to be slowing down any time soon.

2.Investing

The herd mentality can also be seen in investments as well. Instead of making independent decisions, many will make moves depending on emotions and instinct. Social aspects are also a huge part of how people herd together to invest in certain stocks.
Investors will make rash decisions solely based on what their close friends are doing. Most people choose to do what others do simply because of the fear of embarrassment or the fear of being wrong. This fear of being wrong sometimes even goes against the better judgment of making a different choice that seems more logical – a judgment call that could be more profitable in the long run.

3. Choosing restaurants

Being a part of a herd also shows when looking for a place to eat. Let’s be honest, if you saw two restaurants that were almost exactly alike, one was crowded and one was almost empty, which would you choose? I think you would choose the busy and crowded one.
At least, this is true if you have a herd mentality. Many people think that if a restaurant is busy, the food must be better, and yet, it could only be a coincidence. This is a simple example, but it’s true, isn’t it?

4. Social groups

Just like in high school, the herd mentality can rear its head during adulthood. When it comes to making friends and being a part of a social group, people tend to gravitate toward larger groups or groups of popular and extroverted individuals.
In school, peer pressure told us that we were outcasts if we weren’t friends with certain people. Unfortunately, this attitude carries into later life more often than you think. Pay close attention and you may see a herd of people comprised of identical mentalities.

5. Beliefs/spirituality

As I mentioned earlier, herd mentality can be present in belief systems as well. There are many self-professed teachers in this area who are more than willing to share “truths” to others.
A following sometimes develops, not entirely unlike a cult, I venture to say. A person’s beliefcan quickly become a community’s belief. The bigger the community the larger the influence for others to join.

Why is herd mentality unhealthy?

Hey, let’s look at herd mentality this way – if you have a huge group of people of sub-par intelligence, and you add a few highly intelligent people to the large group, do you think the group will become smarter? No.
With the herd mentality, the intelligence level of the group does not change when a different form of stimulus joins. It’s usually the opposite. Most of the time, if intelligent people decide to join such a group, their higher intelligence is dormant to the group, or rather ignored.
All in all, I think we should avoid the herd mentality, and here are a few ways to do that.

Accept conflict

Instead of conforming to the norm, choose the other choice, so to speak. Stop going the easy route and agreeing with people, just because you live with them or they are part of your family. They could even be friends.
It’s easy to become part of the herd, and going against the grain is hard… but you must choose conflict in order to pull away from this mentality. You should practice saying no, get used to confrontations, and choose that road that many others abandon. This is how you start.

Know thyself

Who are you? I mean, if no one else existed, who would you be? Most people identify themselves with some connection to another. When I was younger and married, I often identified as a wife or a mother.
Here’s the thing. One way to find out if you are falling into herd mentality is to spend time with yourself. Find out what makes you happy without any influence of another human being. This is how you know yourself and this is how you sever from the majority rules concept.

Disagree some more

Yes, I mentioned saying no, but you must go further. Stop agreeing with people just because you feel they are going to be picked for promotions or because they’re the popular group. If you feel like disagreeing, then do it.
Sometimes just disagree to surprise the majority and shake up the room. Taking a stand against the majority vote, for instance, will help you further achieve your individuality and tear away from the group. After all, who really knows where these herds are going anyway?

It’s never too late to leave the herd

If you’ve been following the herd for a while now, you can still change this mentality. After a while of following the masses, you may feel a part of yourself dying. This is a wake-up call that you’re falling in deep.
Take some time and look at what your following, who you’re following and why. You may be surprised by what you find. Maybe you can avoid falling into the herd mentality altogether if you’re lucky.
References:
  1. https://assets.publishing.service.gov.uk
  2. https://www.sciencedaily.com
 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 
 

 
Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

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publicado por achama às 23:29
Segunda-feira, 08 / 07 / 19

Dreaming about an Ex: 6 Meanings That Might Surprise You. ~ Janey Davies.

Dreaming about an Ex: 

6 Meanings That Might Surprise You.

By Janey Davies.

July 6th, 2019.

 
 

 



 

Dreaming about an ex can be unsettling, particularly for those in abusive relationships. But can they offer insight into our daily lives?
You might wonder how a dream about an ex-partner can shed light on what’s happening in our day-to-day life. For example, what does it mean for those who are in happy relationships? On the other hand, what about people that are single? How is dreaming about a past ex-partner relevant to our present?
Well, you could argue that we all made up of our past experiences. The things that happened to us when we were younger have shaped us into the people we are today. But clearly, if we are dreaming about an ex-partner, then something is not quite right. But what exactly?

Why do we dream?

Freud believed that dreams are a window into the subconscious mindHe argued that we all have hidden desires, wishes and thoughts that we feel ashamed to voice out loud. As a result, we bury all these hidden desires and they fester in the subconscious. Dreams allow us to process these desires in a healthy manner.
Every dream is unique to us. It is packed full of our own experiences and emotions. Each dream contains symbols and clues that give us hints as to what our subconscious mind is trying to tell us.
There are some would argue that the fact we are dreaming about an ex is irrelevant. However, our subconscious mind has chosen an ex-partner because it believes this is the perfect way to tell us about a particular problem that needs attention.
So, what can we learn about dreams that feature an ex-partner?

Dreaming about an Ex: 6 Meanings and Interpretations

 

1. Unresolved issues

 
I often dream about a certain ex-partner and I believe this is because of unresolved issues between myself and my ex. We were together for ten years and broke up over 18 years ago. However, of all my ex-partners, he is the one I dream about the most.
He was a very controlling person who was jealous all the time. I was a flirtatious person who was probably not the best match for him. The relationship ended very badly.
When I’m dreaming about my ex, I am living in his house and he is not there, but I know he will come back at any time. I think this represents the fear and anxiety I used to feel in our relationship when he would look around for things I had done wrong so he could punish me.
If you are dreaming about your ex, consider whether you have unresolved issues as well. Was the break-up difficult? Do you feel cheated because you didn’t get your share of the house or other possessions?

2. Symbolic of other problems

 
Dreams are symbolic. Many people worry that because they have dreamt of an ex they subconsciously want them back, but that’s not the case. Exes are exes for a reason. Whether it was your decision to break up or not.
Think about why the relationship ended. Was it you that finished it and why? Do you regret it? What could you have done differently if you do regret it?
Even if you didn’t end it, think about how you can prevent the same thing from happening in the future. If your dream about your ex is recurring, then understanding why your relationship ended and what you can do in the future may put a stop to these ongoing dreams.

3. You are missing a part of your life with the ex

 
Our partners are so much more than that person. They are a lifestyle, a circle of friends, an extended family, even an income bracket.
When I split up with my ex, I found out very quickly that surviving on a civil servant salary was a huge change compared to a joint income with my ex. I went from living in a four-bedroomed house in a lovely little village to renting one room in a shared house in the city centre.
Now, my situation is different and I’m very happy, and yet I still dream of my ex. Perhaps I am resentful that he still owns that lovely house in the village? I hope not. But it’s something to be aware of.
Remember, dreaming about an ex doesn’t mean you are missing your ex, it could be the house you lived in, the area, the mutual friends you had, or all the things you did together.

4. Your ex represents a part of you

 
There is a theory that your ex represents a part of you that you might be neglecting. For example, if your ex-partner was particularly loving and you are in a relationship at present, consider your behaviour with your current partner.
Are you being as warm and as caring as you should be? Could your dream about your ex be a wake-up call about your current relationship?
The best way to analyse this dream is to look at your ex-partner’s best or worst qualities and see whether you are either replicating them or you need to pay attention to the ones you are lacking.

4. A chance to forgive

 
In life, we don’t always get the opportunity for closure. People can walk away without giving explanations about their behaviour. Or, they can act inappropriately without facing the consequences.
It can leave us with unfinished business. We can’t move on. However, our dreams allow us to process these unresolved issues.
In our dreams, it doesn’t matter whether your ex feels sorry for causing you upset and pain. You have the to power to forgive and make peace with the situation.
In fact, if you keep having dreams about your ex, forgiving them while you are awake might stop you dreaming about them when you’re asleep. Only then will you be able to move on.

6. There is something lacking in your current partner

 
If the dream about your ex was your first love and you are in a relationship, this is a sign that you feel something is missing in your current relationship.
Our first love reminds us of passion, our youth, and the excitement of being in love for the first time. Therefore, if you are dreaming of your first ex-partner, it is your subconscious nudging you to regain these feelings with your present partner.
Dreaming about an ex has all kinds of meanings and interpretations. The main point to remember is that it doesn’t have to mean you still have feelings for an ex-partner.
If you keep dreaming about an ex, it’s more likely that your subconscious is using this to tell you about an issue that needs resolving right now.
References:
  1. www.bustle.com
  2. www.thecut.com
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

About the Author: Janey Davies.

Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 



Archives:


 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 05:35
Quinta-feira, 04 / 07 / 19

Ikigai: How the Japanese Live with Joy and Purpose (and You Can Too!) ~ Colleen Bartlett

Ikigai: How the Japanese Live with Joy and Purpose (and You Can Too!)

By Colleen Bartlett, Guest Author;

July 2nd, 20719

 

ikigai.
 

 

 
I have two strange passions: I love words (hence my love for writing) and I love learning about different life philosophies. When browsing the bookstore a few months back, I saw a book titled “Ikigai: how the Japanese wake up to joy and purpose every day.” A perfect match for someone like me — ikigai was both a word and new “life philosophy” I’d never heard before. Of course, it caught my attention.
 
We’re told that attaining certain external things such as a good degree and a bottomless bank account is the path to true success. Our innate search for happiness leads us to strive endlessly for that degree, that relationship, that outside recognition and validation.

Because I’m what you might call a “free spirit” as opposed to a “follow the beaten path” kind of girl, living in a society that pushes a certain life direction—multiple degrees, big jobs, etc—has left me feeling like my life isn’t much of a contribution. I would much rather learn and master the concepts of inner peace, authentic connection, self-acceptance, fear.
This conflict of not living according to the world’s standards robbed me of my own inner peace, even though in my heart of hearts, I knew I was meant for a different path. I felt the discomfort of not fitting the mold; I felt out of harmony because I so badly wanted to conform to a world that was beating to a different rhythm from my own heart.

So what does this have to do with ikigai?

The word itself means “reason for being.” Each and every one of us finds fulfillment and joy in different ways. Part of the magic and beauty of life is finding what sparks joy in your life. There are four pillars that you must address in order to embody ikigai:
  1. Find something that you love (for example, what makes time fly by for you?)
  2. Have some meaningful contribution to the world (do you feel your work has a meaningful impact on others?)
  3. Do something that you can get paid for (this is self-explanatory. Everyone needs food on the table!)
  4. Find something you’re good at (it doesn’t have to be an inherent gift you have, but something you’re able and willing to work towards excelling in.)
We readily take out loans and get into school debt because we think having a certain degree will give us job security. Yet, we rarely follow our intuition with the same confidence and faith. When you think of it that way, pursuing what really sets you on fire doesn’t seem as “impractical.”
The question is, are you willing to try new things, take risks, and get outside your comfort zone? Regardless of where you’re at in life, living out a life that both challenges you to reach higher while unleashing the greatness you already have within is the only real way to feel true joy from the inside out. Are you ready to embrace the joy you’re made for and discover the best version of you?

Below are 7 tips to embody ikigai and live a life of joy, fulfillment, balance, and radiance.

 

Step One: Apply self-awareness.

Take a little inventory of your thoughts regarding every facet of your life. Your ambitions, relationships, skills. The only way to make changes is to first become aware of what needs to be changed. In addition, take note of the things that are working for you.
Is there anything that feels particularly mundane about your life? What do you find yourself thinking about most? What’s a “dream” or “wish” you have, that you may not be taking seriously? And what do you truly enjoy?

Step Two: Be intentional.

Intentionality is key to finding fulfillment and balance. Without being intentional with your energy and where you put your focus, you will easily become drained, bored, or off track from your goals altogether.
Getting into a routine and checking in with yourself regularly is a really helpful way of staying in alignment. After all, your “reason for being” must come from living authentically.

Step Three: Stay in your own lane.

It can be easy to look to others for validation or to compare yourself, but at the end of the day, only you know if you are living from a place of authentic purpose.
External distractions can take you away from the little nudges that are trying to speak to you. Tune in to when you feel your best. Inner peace is an arrow. Follow what brings you that settling feeling within.

Step Four: Acknowledge your strengths.

Everyone has unique strengths and talents. It can be easy to take these gifts for granted—ANYONE who can read a map is a magician in my eyes!—but this hinders your innate potential. Sad face! If you’re feeling unsure of what your gifts are, ask some trusted friends or family. But if you can, try and come up with your strengths on your own.
It’s important to acknowledge your abilities and cultivate them. Remember: there are many different types of gifts and talents. It could be your creativity or your drive to make a difference. Maybe you’re good at organization or you love art. Acknowledge your strengths and use them as leverage to building your ikigai.

Step Five: Change your routine.

I’m all for routines. I love my morning and evening routine. They ground me and give my day structure. However, one of the best ways to reset is to do something out of the ordinary. It can be as small as changing your coffee order or taking a day trip to a nearby park.
Changing up your routine can invite new energy and ideas and foster “a-ha” moments. It also makes life more interesting. Don’t let your life become mundane!

Step Six: Challenge yourself. Show up.

You know that bubble of “protection” we call our comfort zone? Yup, it’s time to expand that. It’s time to show up for life more fully. Your comfort zone is like a little hiding place. Challenge yourself to break out of that shell a little. It doesn’t have to be big.
It could be reaching out to an old friend or trying a cooking class. Maybe it’s asking for a raise at work or saying no to something that’s adding stress to your life. Challenging yourself not only builds resilience and self-confidence but also draws out more of your potential. Don’t worry about the outcome, celebrate the effort!

Step Seven: Recalibrate.

What worked for you last year—or even last month— may not be working in your best interest now. Stay tuned to your growth. This is part of living with intentionality and awareness. Maybe you need to go to bed earlier or wake up earlier. Maybe you need more time alone. Recalibrate.
And lastly, here’s a bonus tip: BREATHE. You don’t need to have it all figured out at once. Plans may change or fall through, but these are often little blessings in disguise leading you in a better direction, even if it’s hard to see or believe in the moment. Follow the inklings in your heart. Dare to challenge your doubts. You are capable of so much more than you know.
I don’t know about you, but I don’t want life to pass me by. After all, the more I can embody ikigai, the more love and joy I can give to others. So what about you? How do you want to live out your ikigai?
Comment below! 
Colleen Bartlett

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Colleen Bartlett is a mental health advocate, songwriter, and blogger whose passion is to bring awareness to mental health through her writing and music. She believes in the indomitable resilience of the human heart and spirit and hopes to help others tap into their inner brilliance by sharing her own experiences with honesty and warmth. Check out her website at www.colleenbartlett.com.

COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.

 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


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publicado por achama às 21:14
Segunda-feira, 24 / 06 / 19

How to Overcome Inferiority Complex with 7 Methods That Work ~ Sherrie.

How to Overcome Inferiority Complex with 7 Methods That Work.

By Sherrie.

June 23rd, 2019

 

Confidence equals good mental health, and that’s why learning to overcome the inferiority complex is so important.
Having an inferiority complex means you never really feel good about yourself. In fact, most other people in your life seem greater, more intelligent or more talented. Others may also seem beautiful as opposed to your ugliness.
Do these descriptions ring a bell? Well, learning to overcome the inferiority complex is the key to a better life. No one should feel less than anyone else.

Methods to help you change your mindset and overcome inferiority complex

 
Understanding how to overcome the feelings associated with inferiority complex should be your focus. In order to change your mindset, you have to know exactly what you’re facing.
The inferiority complex is not just feeling bad about yourself temporarily, it’s a feeling that persists from day to day – they’re negative feelings you’ve accepted about yourself.

There are methods, however, that help you get rid of these feelings over time:

1. Pinpoint one source

The truth is, you may feel inferior to many people. That’s the horrible nature of the inferiority complex. The good news is, you can focus on one person to help you pinpoint where your weaknesses are. For instance, choose a so-called “superior person”, and ask yourself one question: “Why do I feel inferior to this person?”
Analyzing the one person you picked will help you build levels of confidence. Say you feel that the person is more attractive than you, more intelligent, and more sociable. Well, you can start by finding one thing you can do that they cannot.
There are things, trust me, because no one is perfect. In fact, there may be many things you can do better, but you’ve just focused on your inferior state as opposed to their seemingly perfected one. Do you see? Try this one out as soon as possible. You may be surprised.

2. Positive self-talk

Most of the time, we can learn a great deal about how to get over feeling inferior just by talking good to ourselves. Be honest, how many times have you said, “I’m ugly”“I’m not good enough”, or “I wish I was more like someone else?” Well, I’m sure we’ve all fallen prey to these thoughts from time to time.
The key here is to practice countering these negative thoughts with positive ones. For each negative talk we have with ourselves, we should strive to have two positive ones.
Over time, you will notice a great change in your confidence level. And if someone happens to insult you, you will be armed and ready to defend your self-esteem.

3. Find the root

Of course, if you want to know how to destroy the inferiority complex, you must remember where it came from. Maybe you have no idea how the negative self-talk and feelings even surfaced. Well, if you experienced rejection or trauma in your early life, inferiority feelings may be deep-rooted and will have to be pulled out and examined.
You can start analyzing yourself or you can seek professional help in this area. Some roots, I must admit, travel deep within your mind.
Some of these roots go far and some are large, meaning they encompass multiple issues, situations and people from your past. This is where untangling roots also come into play. To heal your confidence, you must discover these roots.

4. Gravitate toward positive people

Another way to overcome feelings of inferiority is to surround yourself with as many positive people as possible. Being around positive people remind you of how you’re supposed to treat yourself. They remind you of your worth and talents.
If you’ve noticed, positive people usually don’t criticize others. Instead, they may lovingly point out ways to improve. On the other hand, negative people will always have a way to bring you and themselves down simultaneously.
It’s obvious what you should do in this case. Stay as far away from toxic behavior or negative people as possible.

5. Good mantras and proclamations

Not only should you talk good to yourself, but you should also proclaim your good points. When you feel inferior, speak a positive mantra about yourself.
For instance,  you may say, “I am talented”, and “I am kind”. This helps build you up by speaking your worth out loud. Whether you are spiritual or not, I’m telling you, the spoken word is a powerful thing. It truly is capable of turning things around for the better.

6. Always be yourself

If you’ve fallen victim to idolization, which we all do to a certain extent, then you should step back a moment. Immediately, stop all attempts to be like someone else, right now. After you feel clean of everyone else’s influence, fill yourself with yourself.
That’s right, embrace who you are, and examine all your good points. I bet, you have so much to be thankful for, and so many hidden talents. This simple move can boost your ability to overcome inferiority and other negative complexes.

7. Stop comparisons

That brings me to another toxic and heinous act we fall victim to – comparisons. It’s so easy to feel inferior when we compare ourselves with others. We should never ever do that.
So, for this last method, let’s practice working to better ourselves apart from anyone else. Yes, appreciate others and their talents, but never let those things decide who you should be. End comparisons now.

We can all feel better about ourselves

Learning how to overcome inferiority complex is no easy task, I will not lie. However, being able to accomplish this task allows you to open up to a multitude of possibilities in your life. The ability to be confident is a power that so few actually hold. In fact, the inferiority complex inhabits most of us on some level.
Regardless, we should try every day, to love and appreciate ourselves. We are the only one like us on the face of this earth. We have a mixture of unique talents and characteristics that the world surely needs.
I’m going to say you’re beautiful, talented, and worthy, to help you jump start your journey on defeating the inferiority complex, and also just in case no one else has told you lately.
Be well.
 
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://www.betterhealth.vic.gov.au
 

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 



About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 04:44
Quinta-feira, 20 / 06 / 19

9 Signs of a Truly Independent Person: Are You One? ~ Sherrie, learning-mind.

9 Signs of a Truly Independent Person: Are You One?

By Sherrie.

June 20th, 2019

 

Being an independent person doesn’t come from living an easy life. The trials of life make you stronger.

I get angry sometimes when things go wrong. I sometimes lose hope when past hardships repeat themselves over and over. But I think this happens because there is yet something we’re meant to learn. I also think these trials can make prosperous. This means, no matter how hard it gets, I know I can be an independent person.

How strong and independent are you?

Being an independent and strong person comes with a price sometimes. We build walls when experiencing hurt after hurt. The callouses that form over pain and abuse can also leave us a bit insensitive to the feelings of others.
However, that’s not how we all work, or how we should strive to be. Some of us become independent without losing the ability to open up. That’s the focus of our strength.

Anyway, here are signs that you could be an independent type of person. Or maybe someone you know has these traits.

1. You can live alone

Being independent means you can live alone. You don’t need the help of others to survive, and you always find a way to stay financially stable.
You also have no need for occupying the same spaces with other people, unless of course, you want to. You’re so good with yourself that living alone is actually preferable at times.

2. You’re a future planner

While many people say “live in the moment”, an independent and solid person will always plan for times to come. They see the big picture and not the temporary high of present fun and companionship.
I will say it’s good to enjoy each day, but it’s also important to save for the future. Independent people are perfectionists at planning for the future.

3. Saying ‘no’ isn’t hard

For some, saying no is difficult, especially if they are afraid of hurting the people close to them. For dependent people, saying yes, and going along with things is easier than mustering the strength to decline.
People of an independent nature can easily say no and not even give an explanation for their answer. They are bold and present an attitude that says, “I’m saying no just because I want to.”. Do you see?

4. It’s hard to ask for help

Asking for help isn’t hard for some, but for independent and stubborn people, they hate charity. To independent individuals, asking for help means weakness.
Being weak cannot be a part of their plans, for present or for the future. To them, it may even be a sign that they cannot make it on their own if they ask for help.

5. You have few friends

When you’re independent, you have fewer friends than most people. Truth be told, this is because you spend time with people expecting nothing in return.
Now, I don’t know how true this is for everybody, but many of those with many friends often expect favors and help. Since you’re independent, you only see friends as companions. Choosing your friends in this manner helps you realize who you truly appreciate and love.

6. You have an unshakable self-worth

When you’ve become an independent person, you won’t have to get validation from other people. No matter how many insults they use, you will still know who you really are. You will see your value, your beauty, and your loyalty, and nothing can change this.
Of course, there may be times when you’re shaken momentarily, but you bounce back. This helps you see the one who insults you for who they really are. You will know this independent individual by their resilience in the face of adversity.

7. You go out alone

Most of the time, you will go out alone. You love to shop for things alone because you can go and leave as you please. You even like to eat at restaurants alone sometimes.
Being alone in public feels good to you, and it doesn’t leave you empty. You don’t have to socialize with friends out on the town, but you can still have a conversation with people who are already there. It’s an interesting trait.

8. You can lead

When independent, you can take the lead and get difficult things done. You will notice both men and women taking charge of difficult situations, and this usually means they are pretty independent of others.
Sometimes men are intimidated by women who take charge, but unfortunately, this is because they are usually the dependent sort. Strong men aren’t intimidated, they rather help strong women succeed. This can be seen the other way around too but in a slightly different aspect.

9. You’re financially independent

Yes, we already know the independent sort are people who live alone, and they are also those who refuse help. Well, if, for some reason, an independent person just happens to owe money, say for car payments or other financed things, they will most certainly be on time and try to pay off the debt as soon as possible.
They hate owing people anything. It feels like independence is being taken away when you have to borrow money against something.

Being truly independent

There’s a reason people act the way they do. Some are born independent while others grow into these strong individuals because of past trauma or life-long hardship. They’ve learnedtheir own value and potential. An independent person is one of the most exemplary types of human beings to ever exist, and I attain to become more like this as I grow.
Are you an independent one? Do you strive to become more independent? If so, you must take heed if you wish to become more independent that you don’t lose your ability to feel emotions.
If you’re not careful, you can build walls while building your confidence and strength. Here again, as with many other aspects of life, I think balance is the key. So, go forth and conquer.
References:
  1. https://www.theodysseyonline.com
  2. https://www.lifehack.org

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 



About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

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Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 19:56
Terça-feira, 18 / 06 / 19

6 Things Messy Handwriting May Reveal about Your Personality ~ Sherrie.

6 Things Messy Handwriting May Reveal about Your Personality.

By Sherrie.

June 17th, 2019

 

I’ve seen all sorts of handwriting styles, large and small. Messy handwriting reveals many things about a person as well.
People write with pen and paper much less than they did before. So, you might say that messy handwriting isn’t a concern for teachers, friends, and employers. The popularity of technology has transformed the way we create stories and complete assignments. Whether professional or creative, our writing is mostly digital.
However, some people still pick up that pen, and when they do, their personality shines through their handwriting.

Messy handwriting and what it may reveal

My son writes in the messiest way. Sometimes you can’t even read what he’s written. He is left-handed, but that has nothing to do with it. In fact, I’ve asked him to switch hands, but it just gets worse. What does this say about my son?
We’re going to explore that and other characteristics he may share with others. So, what does messy handwriting say about your personality?

1. Intelligent

I can surmise that messy handwriting has a lot to do with more than average intelligence. What’s the proof? Well, my son remained in accelerated classes during his entire education. His grades dropped during regular classes because he was bored with the curriculum. He is smart and his handwriting is definitely messy, as I’ve mentioned before.
If your handwriting is messy, it could be that you have higher intelligence. If you’re not sure of your child’s intelligence level, maybe you can have them tested. Pay attention if you do have an intelligent child and notice if they have a messy sort of handwriting.
I will mention this, however, there are a few studies which suggest the opposite, that neat handwriting is linked to higher intelligence, so keep that in mind.

2. Emotional baggage

Many people who have messy handwriting can also be carrying emotional baggage. Often this writing is filled with a mixture of cursive and print letterforms, usually slanted to the left.
In case you didn’t know, emotional baggage is emotional hurts carried over from one person to another, or from one situation to a different situation in life. The writing shows the inability to let go emotionally. The words are just unsure.

3. Volatile or bad-tempered

A person who exhibits a bad temper will often write in a haphazard way. It doesn’t always mean they are quick to get angry, oh no. Sometimes it’s just that they carry anger inside until they have a violent outburst. Again, an example using my son, as he has a tendency to hold in anger until he explodes. This shows in his writing.
A bad temper can cause bad handwriting just because people with this anger disposition are usually impatient. With messy and rushed handwriting, we can see the strong emotions come through.

4. Mental issues

Messy handwriting can indicate that the person could have a mental illness. Often this handwriting will consist of switching slants, a mixture of print and cursive writing, and large spaces between sentences. I am sitting here right now looking at a page of my writing from last night.
I have multiple mental illnesses, and my writing shows my instability. I have also witnessed several others with mental illness who have the same sort of writing style. Now, I know it’s not set in stone, but it’s a pretty good indicator of some sort of connection between the two.

5. Low self-esteem

Have you ever noticed the handwriting of someone with low self-esteem? It’s strange and yet messy as well. Those with low self-esteem not only have messy handwriting but also have random loops and strange styles of capital letters.
People with low self-worth are insecure, and yet they are trying desperately to rise above the insecurity by purposely enlarging their letters as they write. As they attempt to do this, they also try to write in bubble letters.
This usually falls right back into messy and disorganized handwriting because it’s hard to hold onto the façade. I know this why? Because sometimes this is me.

6. Introverted

While this might not be true about everyone, it was true about my brother at one time. While my brother has changed and embraced some extrovert attributes, it’s usually in the online atmosphere I remember he used to write everything in these tiny messy sentences. You could barely read them although they were lovely and interesting if you succeeded.
Does he still write like this? I have no idea because most of his dictation is online. I do believe that introverts, like my brother, sometimes write in messy forms. Maybe his style hasn’t changed much.
I also believe introverts are intelligent and so this matches another aspect of messy and cluttered handwriting. As introverts stay at home a lot, they usually have less to prove to others, and so their handwriting is pretty much as they please.

Are you a messy writer?

Many of my family members have messy handwriting, and yet, my middle son has neat and beautiful handwriting. But that’s another topic altogether and for another day.
Remember, most of the attributes of your personality are positive when it comes to having a messy sort of handwriting, so you should be proud of your scribble. I’m okay with mine.
 
References:
  1. https://www.msn.com
  2. https://www.bustle.com
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 



About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Thanks to: Learning Mind <noreply+feedproxy@google.com>
 

Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

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publicado por achama às 00:58
Quarta-feira, 12 / 06 / 19

5 Signs the Illusion of Control Is Ruining Your Life and How to Stop It ~ Sherrie.

5 Signs the Illusion of Control Is Ruining Your Life and How to Stop It.

By Sherrie.

June 11th, 2019

 

If you think you’re in control of life, think again. The illusion of control, although sometimes positive, can have negative consequences.
Sometimes, to be honest, I believe that people who do wrong toward others are punished. Hey, maybe they are. As for me, if I fall into the illusion of control in this aspect, I spend much of my time thinking that I will be avenged at every insult or attack. That’s a waste of time.
The illusion of being in control can definitely be positive, as it gives us the confidence to handle a situation. It can also be negative because we cannot possibly handle every situation. The truth is, some things are out of our control completely. Our acceptance of this fact is important.

How the illusion of control ruins our lives

If you go even deeper than that, you find those who live every day thinking they’re in control of the entirety of their existence, which isn’t true.
There are signs that the illusion and trickery of control have taken over, pushing them toward a chaotic and stressful existence. Here are a few examples.

1. Paranoia

Paranoia is a sign that you are under the illusion that you control things. You might think you’re in control, but maybe you are just watching your life unfold naturally, good or bad. If your spells and incantations don’t work, then the illusion of control will tell you that someone has transpired to bring you bad luck.
Or they could be following you, trying to do harm, or even ruin your future. If you depend on charms or other luck bringing aspects to stay in control, you could be fooling yourself.
Your paranoia could get ridiculous if not checked. If someone you love is always paranoid, you could be dealing with someone who feels like they are losing this control they once had.

2. Dwelling in the past

Someone who dwells too long on past events may be living under the illusion that they could have controlled certain situations.
When you live your life, you make mistakes. Over time, these mistakes become part of the past. Some of them affect us and our loved ones deeply. The illusion of control makes us think that if only we could go back in time and change things, that life would be different.
And maybe life would be different, but dwelling on this fact creates a fantasy world that is unhealthy to live in. If you’re constantly reliving the past and rehearsing different ways you could have approached situations, you really are ruining your life right now.
You may even look back at “now” and wish you could have changed that too.

3. Abuse

You see this is relationships when one person tries to control the actions of another. But when it all boils down to it, you cannot really control anyone. Eventually, they will do what they want anyway.
If you notice one person in the relationship trying to control the other, this is abuse. They are also under the illusion that they are in control. They’re not really in control and they never will be.

4. Cosmetic surgery obsession

You know the ones, the women and men who keep getting facelifts, tummy tucks, and breast augmentation. Yes, those individuals can be obsessed. These people think they are in total control of how they appear and how long they will remain beautiful.
The truth is, cosmetic surgery does work, to some extent, but it cannot keep us alive forever.
We have yet to discover the fountain of youth and until we do, we will age, and we will die. That’s the simple and concise truth of the matter. Plastic surgery can ruin our lives by keeping us locked into getting more and more changes and leaving us always unsatisfied.

5. Reckless behavior

You will recognize those who suffer from the illusion of total control by their reckless behavior. These individuals actually think that they are invincible.
I thought like this when I was around 18 years old. They walk down dark alleyways, drive super fast on the freeway, and even indulge in drugs and alcohol.
They really think they are in control at all times, and they will even get furious if you try to stop them. You know these people well. You can tell by their restlessness and boredom.

How can we stop thinking this way?

It’s not easy to break out of a mindset that’s been imprinted upon us from an early age. But, if you can manage to see things from a different perspective, you can learn to actually gain self-control over your illusion of control, if you get my drift.
Utilizing self-control helps you see logic instead of fantasy. It helps you realize that you are no more powerful, invincible, immortal or lucky than the rest of us.
Once you’ve realized this fact, you can focus on really enjoying a good life. Life is full of so many wonderful things, some far out of our control. So, for what we cannot control, I hope we can reach a place of acceptance. I think there we can find the peace we so deserve.
References:
  1. https://greatergood.berkeley.edu
  2. https://www.sciencedaily.com
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 02:48
Quinta-feira, 06 / 06 / 19

When Blaming Others for Your Failures, Consider These Uncomfortable Truths ~ Sherrie.

When Blaming Others for Your Failures, Consider These Uncomfortable Truths.

By Sherrie.

June 6th, 2019

 

Excruciating pain at a turning point of our lives will make us stop blaming others. Until then, we will be empty.
Thinking back as far as I can pick out times when I refused to take the blame for things. I remember tantrums in my teenage years, but usually, it was because I didn’t get something I wanted. I think blaming others came later on during my early adulthood when I blamed my shortcomings on the way I was being treated.

Why are we prone to blaming others?

Yes, negative treatment will make you feel victimized, and you will blame others for your future misfortune, but at some point, you must take responsibility. But there are darker, more selfish reasons for blaming everything on others.
Let’s take a look at why we do this hurtful thing, shall we?

1. To attack others

As heartbreaking as it is, attacking others is a way of hurting them to avoid taking responsibility. When approached about something they’ve done, irresponsible people become defensive and lash out.
They don’t have to be a narcissistic person. They could just be afraid of the consequences of their bad behavior, and they’re looking for a way out of the mess. Placing blame on others and flipping the situation may have become a natural defense mechanism.

2. Truth found in narcissistic behavior

I know a man, who, when angry, claims to feel no remorse for his outbursts. You can see the lack of empathy when he yells and throws tantrums that I recognize from my children’s early years.
The first time I heard this outburst, I was taken aback – I was shocked by the pitch and tone of his bellows. Something shifted between us in that moment.
I’ve heard this very man call others narcissists, when in fact, he fit much of the characteristics of this toxic personality. The truth is, it wasn’t always his fault, he was raised to take no responsibility for his actions. He used blaming all others as the only way he could feel healthy self-esteem.

3. Why can’t we accept failures?

I want you to know that it’s okay to be imperfect, and it’s also okay to let the world know this. Failure is just a part of life, and being open and honest about your shortcomings is a step toward growth and strength. It’s a strength that no one can take away from you. It’s an inner honesty with who we really are.
When we cannot accept failure, we cannot accept that we are imperfect. Most people who do this have created a facade that they show others. If someone manages to get close enough to them and sees the truth, they will lash out.
This is because the perfection they display is being threatened to be revealed. This can be devastating to those who are stuck in blaming and shaming others.

4. It’s easy and it’s lazy

It’s so much easier to blame all others for your mistakes. After all, who wants to take the time for self-analysis? We don’t want the consequences that come with being caught in a shady situation or making a mistake when brushing it off with lies ends the conversation faster.
Most of the time, unfortunately, those who play the blame game learned this dynamic early in life, and use it all through adulthood.
They alienate partners and fail at long-term relationships. They are sometimes remarkably gifted at hiding this about themselves, sometimes as long as two years into the union, but after that, the mask starts to fall off revealing some of the most childish and heinous behavior you have ever seen.

5. There’s no moral compass

Usually, those who have the habit of blaming and criticizing others are doing so to have the freedom to act in any way they want. They cover up things, they lie, and they avoid any sort of confrontation at all costs.
If they are religious or spiritual, they love to attend worship services as long as love is the subject of teaching. But as soon, as self-discipline and accountability are introduced, they proclaim they are being controlled.
Morality, standards, dignity, and loyalty, among others, are things they purposely overlook. After all, these things will interfere in their agenda, as I stated before. So, they start to downgrade spiritual aspects in life, but they do not convict themselves for the things they need to fix in their lives.
As frightening as it may seem, the doctrine they once followed will change according to their selfish needs instead of doing the right thing.

Hope for individuals who blame their actions on others

While it’s not easy to change what’s learned between birth and 7 years of age, psychology states that these years are the most impressionable years of a person’s life. What they are taught frame how they will approach things during their later life. So, this means, blaming others has become a deep imprint.
To help those who always blame their failures on others, therapy, intervention, and accountability is a must. At home, be careful not to fall victim to fear when they grow furious. Don’t invade their space, but certainly stand your ground.
Remember, it’s okay to feel a little sad when we fail, but it’s not okay to pass the buck to another. Let’s strive to be better people.
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://hbr.org
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Thanks to: Learning Mind <noreply+feedproxy@google.com>
 

Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

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publicado por achama às 17:48
Domingo, 19 / 05 / 19

7 Signs of Ignorant People Who Just Pretend to Be Smart ~ Sherrie.

7 Signs of Ignorant People Who Just Pretend to Be Smart.

By Sherrie.

May 18th, 2019

 

Some people appear to be intelligent, but usually, these individuals are more ignorant than smart. There are ways to tell.
Have you ever met someone who seemed to know everything? Well, if you’re a bit naïve or just young, you might believe the things they say. However, if you use your head, your actual intelligence, and experience, you might find that these are actually ignorant people.

Are these people intelligent or ignorant?

I’ve personally been in the company of a few people who just weren’t as smart as they proclaim. And yes, when I was young, I fell for their self-proclaimed smarts. Now, I am older and I can sense when someone has no clue about their so-called facts.
Let me show you how you can tell the difference between truly intelligent individuals and those who are just ignorant and uneducated people.

1. Being Fake

One of the most common ways to fake intelligence is by trying to prove it. People who present themselves as intelligent, and push their form of intelligence on others are actually not that smart.
I’ve seen people who always seem to know facts about things they’ve never encountered or known. They put on a show and try to convince everyone of their authenticity. They want to be seen as smart, but the truth is, they’re not. If you’re not careful, you can also fall into this trap.

2. They don’t think of the future

Most people who pretend to be smart will always live for instant pleasure. Yes, it’s great to enjoy every day as it comes, but it’s also just as important to think in the long term.
Ignorant thoughts of people revolve around what they can get now and not what the future holds. They usually don’t have a plan “b” either, which also involves preparing for altered paths….which will also be governed by what the future brings.
Always make sure you balance thoughts of now and thoughts of the future as well. This boosts your intelligence.

3. Don’t apply their own principles

People who are ignorant but think they are smart are prone to neglect responsibilities. These are not just ordinary responsibilities, these are tasks and principles they have set for other people in their lives.
For instance, if they preach about being honest, and yet they tell lies, they are just not smart people. On the exterior, however, they project that they are really intelligent in their speeches for change. Listen up! Be honest and you will be 10 times more intellectual.

4. There is no critical thinking

Those who give advice but do not look within are devoid of critical thinking. Critical thinking is when you ask yourself if you’re doing the same things that others are doing.
If you are offended by someone’s insults, then ask yourself, “Do I insult people as well?” If you don’t ever do analyze your own actions and words, then you’re not as intelligent as you think, and you sure don’t let people know this fact.

5. They like dramatic events and relationships

When ignorant groups of people get together, they enjoy gossip. Most of this gossip revolves around the drama that happens in their lives, whether it’s about work or something at home.
You can see the lack of intelligence as they laugh about the misfortune of others. What they fail to understand is that this same misfortune or something similar can happen to them as well. But they just don’t have the intellect to consider this fact.

6. They listen less and speak more

Those who are really ignorant types of people just have to get their point across all the time. When they’re with friends or family, they tend to hog the spotlight will tales of their accomplishments and good deeds.
When others want to talk, ignorant individuals often interrupt and change the topic back to the same old story they’ve been telling.
Smart people listen, I mean really listen to what others have to say, giving room to hear and yet develop their own thoughts and opinions quietly. So remember, listen and learn.

7. Envious of other people

Ignorant and selfish people are often jealous of others. I don’t necessarily mean jealousy as in relationships. They are jealous and envious of the accomplishments of others.
Instead of striving toward their own goals, they often copy or try to steal recognition because of their envy. It’s the ignorance that’s hidden by the attempt to seem smart in their endeavors.
They will definitely take credit for their behavior in this area. Just be happy for others and focus on your own accomplishments.

No, you’re not as smart as you think you are

If you fall into any of these categories, you should check yourself. By the way, staying away from this behavior and actually asking help from others makes you smarter. Continuing to learn things about life is also a great way to boost your intelligence instead of keeping what you have and faking it.
Some people may be fooled for a while, but they will eventually recognize ignorant people for who they really are. So, if you are trying to fool others with your fake intelligenceit will not work forever.
Here’s a challenge if you suffer from this. Take some time to learn, ask, and become more selfless. In the process, your intelligence will grow and you will actually become just as smart as you think you are…maybe even smarter. It’s just a thought.
References:
  1. https://www.lifehack.org
  2. https://www.dailymail.co.uk

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Thanks to: Learning Mind <noreply+feedproxy@google.com>
 

Archives:

 

 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 

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publicado por achama às 05:08
Domingo, 19 / 05 / 19

How to Find Your Authentic Self by Asking These 5 Simple Questions ~ Kolyanne Russ

How to Find Your Authentic Self by Asking These 5 Simple Questions.

By Kolyanne Russ, Guest Author;

May 17th, 20719

 

find your authentic self.
 

 

Getting to know the authentic self that is hiding deep inside you is the first step on the long path of liberation.
Just think about it, if you dare. Your true self is hidden deep within you, covered by layers upon layers of opinions, expectations, and excuses. You are not what you think you are or what you’re expecting of yourself or how you excuse your behavior in front of yourself and others.
The sooner you let go of this well-practiced character you play, the sooner you’ll reach your authentic self. This is the person you’ll feel at home with, however flawed or afraid they might be. This is the person you’ll be able not to change, but to shape, mold, hone and improve.
Everything else would be a lie, and lies are heavy. Lies weigh you down like chains.

But how do you reach this person you’ve ghosted for so long?

Venturing inward is the best chance you have. Instead of keeping everything on the surface, dive deeper underneath. Introspection will help you break the ice and adjust your eyes to the dark. But make no mistake, you’ll need to go pass beyond what feels comfortable and safe.
You’ll need to start reflecting upon what you’re seeing there.
Self-reflection is looking the truth in the eyes and living to tell. It’s also a learning experience that allows you to discover who you are and what you want.
Self-reflection always leads to insight, thus contributing always new and accurate details to your once distorted self-image.

Getting to know your authentic self starts with these five open-ended questions:

1. What Are Five Non-Negotiable Values in My Life?

 
Being flexible and willing to compromise is a fine quality in a person, but even the best of us must draw a line somewhere. The things you are not ready to negotiate on are your non-negotiable values. They are your very essence, the foundations, and principles of your true being.
Do you know what they are?
Figuring out what matters the most to you will keep you on course through thick and thin. Not only in terms of moral fiber and integrity, no. Even more importantly, these non-negotiable values will help you stay empowered and in control of everything you need to reach your goal.
At the same time, they will help you discover your priorities in life.
So ask yourself this:
  • What about your life fills you with pure love and joy?
  • What are some of the qualities you admire the most?
Maybe you’ll say health, self-expression, and authority, or honesty, friendship, and family. To a lot of people, love, empathy, and faith are non-negotiable. For me, that’s creativity, beauty, and love. For you, it may be something very different, like success, diligence, and ambition.
There are no wrong answers here.

2. What Would I Do If I Couldn’t Fail?

 
The fear of failure masks our greatest desires.
Fear stands between you and your authentic self too, keeping you comfortably tucked in a bed of lies. This is your Netflix & Chill persona telling you that you are too fat to get up and start pursuing beauty. You can try, it whispers in your ear, but you’ll only end up embarrassing yourself.
This is your corporate self, telling you that you’d never succeed as an artist. Or your stay-at-home-mom fear, preventing you from seeking a career.
Terrified of failing, we often decide not to even try. This is why so many of us end up miserable in our private and professional relationships. Instead of seeking what we truly want at the cost of failure, we choose to settle for less. It’s so much safer there, where you cannot fail.
But what would you do if you were guaranteed success?
Whatever your instinct is screaming right now is what you really want from this life.
So what if you fail? You’ll not be the first nor last to lose hope and regain new strength. If you think about it, you have absolutely nothing to lose. Bruises will only make you wiser and closer to who you are. You’ll understand that success is not in succeeding, but in overcoming fear.

3. What Are the Experiences I Want to Have to Live My Dream Life?

Of course, life isn’t solely about collecting those crowning gems.
Though staying focused on your quest is admirable, you must take some time to recharge your batteries and recuperate your energy. This will help you appreciate your achievements more, which will, in turn, keep you energized and motivated enough to reach the end goal.
Do you know what else you must do from time to time? Self-reflect on the things you’ve done and the person you’ve become.
This is why what happens on sidequests may be even more important than all the obstacles you overcome while your eyes are fixed on the prize.
These are the experiences you go through alone or share with the people you love, only seemingly uneventful and unmeaningful. Like visiting Louvre or climbing the Mount Everest.
Your bucket list must be full of these and similar forgotten gems. Find some time to collect these too. They will keep you grounded and in touch with who you are even after you become a big shot with no time for life’s simple pleasures. Cherish them as priceless things they are.

4. What Is on My Schedule That Doesn’t Need to Be There?

 
Have you figured out who is your biggest enemy in life? No, it’s not fear. It’s time.
Whether or not you’ll fear the inevitable depends on you alone. This paralyzing, irrational emotion can be overcome with a shred of will, but time can never be stopped. The best you can do about it is not to be wasteful. Commit your time to two things – mindfulness and growth.
Mindfulness feels like breaking the clock, as it allows you to freeze the moment and savor every last bit of it. Growth on the hand is the closest thing we have to a time-defying spell. The more you grow, the longer you’re remembered. Grand people are immortal, like long-dead stars.
So think about what you’re doing with your time. Is it carefully managed in a way that nurtures your non-negotiable values?
Are there things on your schedule that you can abandon or cut back? Have you made promises for a couple of months from now that you will regret then? Are you giving away your precious time on toxic people? Be grateful for the time you’ve been given. Don’t throw it away.

5. What Am I Doing That I Don’t Enjoy, and What Am I Doing That I Love?

 
In discovering who you are and what you want, perhaps the most telling signs are the things you’re doing on a daily basis. The things you enjoy, you should keep. The things you hate, not so much. Day by day, they are taking you one step further from who you truly are.
Of course, not all good things are enjoyable. You cannot throw around self-reflection as an excuse for being a selfish partner of a bad friend. If you hate going to work, you shouldn’t quit just because.
Life is a fickle thing and you must discover the balance between your authentic self and a sufficient version of you.
If you look deep down and see that you’re afraid, look again. That’s your crooked self-beliefthat’s distorting your true image.
But to return to your last question on the path to self-discovery, use self-reflection to see what you love and enjoy the most. Let these things be something worth sacrificing for, an intrinsic motivation behind doing the necessary things you don’t enjoy very much.

Final Thought

Never give up on your authentic self in return for love and success.
An actor can only play a role for that long before losing all sense of who he is. Make honesty your non-negotiable value, live with no fear of your hidden flaws, embrace the experiences that make you vulnerable and exposed, and spend more time reflecting upon your choices.
But most importantly, do everything for a chance to do what you love.
Kolyanne Russ

 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Kolyanne Russ is a relationship and love coach with a conscious and stress-free approach. She loves to empower and motivate people to live great lives and pursue their passions. She works with fabulous women to help them create a vision of their ideal relationship and gain the confidence to achieve it. Kolyanne also writes and shares educational and inspirational content on her blog at Pinch of Attitude.
Articles from guest authors who contribute their writings to Learning Mind.

 

 

 

 

COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:
 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily


 




 
 
publicado por achama às 04:59
A Luz está a revelar a Verdade, e esta libertar-nos-á! -Só é real o AMOR Incondicional. -Quando o Amor superar o amor pelo poder, o mundo conhecerá a Paz; Jimi Hendrix. -Somos almas a ter uma experiência humana!

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