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Sábado, 18 / 04 / 20

Elderly Loneliness and Its 4 Causes and Effects

Elderly Loneliness and Its 4 Causes and Effects

Lottie Miles, M.A.

learning-mind.com

Posted April 17th, 2020.

 
.elderly loneliness causes effects

 


Loneliness can affect people at any stage of their lives. However, as we get older, the fundamentals of life and death mean we become more vulnerable to loneliness. From retirement to bereavement, ill health, and physical distance from loved ones, common causes of loneliness can mount up as we age.
But what do we mean when we talk about loneliness and social isolation? How bad is loneliness for your health? And what can we do to combat loneliness as we get older? In this post, we will explore the answers to these questions by looking at 4 causes and effects of elderly loneliness.

What do we mean by social isolation and loneliness?

By 75 and above, over 50% of people live alone. Some people may live alone far from their family and friends making it harder to have regular contact with them. Indeed, millions of older people living alone can go 5 or 6 days every week without seeing anyone.
The combination of these factors can usefully describe someone being isolated. However, being alone or isolated doesn’t necessarily mean we feel lonely. So what do we mean when we talk about loneliness?
Whilst being alone can certainly contribute to loneliness, it is still possible to feel lonely when engaged with others. As such, loneliness relates specifically to an emotional response we feel when our need for positive social contact isn’t met. We may also feel lonely if the people around us don’t understand us.
Loneliness is a universal feeling everyone has likely experienced at some time. When it comes to fighting loneliness, the important thing is having quality social contact with people.

4 Causes and Effects of Elderly Loneliness

Numerous studies have shown how social isolation and loneliness can be damaging to your health. For example, Holt-Lundstad’s 2010 study found that the combination of living alone, loneliness, and poor quality social connections is as bad for an individual’s health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day.
In a later study, they found loneliness increased the risk of death by 29%. Vlatorta, et. al’s 2016 paper found loneliness heightened the risk of dementia, depression, and heart disease.
Here, we outline 4 common causes of loneliness for elderly people. We also consider the effects of each of these causes and some strategies to overcome them.

1. Adjusting to retirement

Whilst retirement should be something we look forward to, many people find adjusting to it hard. From the routine provided by work, daily contact with different people, and a clear sense of direction. Work provides a structure for so much of our lives. When we give this up, we can feel lost, experience a loss of identity, and often have to learn how to combine more time with less money.
The effect of these challenges can lead people to feel lonely. However, new structures and routines can be built into retired life. Extra time, can also offer you the freedom to learn something new.
Learning new things or taking up an exercise class is known to be beneficial for a healthy mind. Finding new ways to engage with others in a meaningful way makes it easier to build quality social contact into your life.

2. Bereavement and loss of companionship

As we get older, more of the people we know and love die. The loss of a partner can cause chronic loneliness. People may also experience this if their partner’s health deteriorates and they have to be moved into a care home.
As we get older, we may also find ourselves living further away from our friends and less able to visit. Lifetime friends may have passed away, adding to a sense of loneliness. Nevertheless, there is value in nostalgia and a longing for the past, it is important and can be beneficial and even overcome loneliness.
Making new connections is a great way to overcome this cause of loneliness. Indeed, finding new passions, or re-igniting old ones, can help combat this cause of loneliness likely to affect us all at some point in our lives. From volunteering to dance, art, or anything else that interests you, by engaging with new people in different ways, we can find ways to cope with elderly loneliness caused by loss.

3. Issues with health

As we get older, we are more likely to experience ill health and mobility decline. Ill health and loss of mobility can make it physically difficult to socialize with others in ways we used to. As such, ill-health can itself be both a cause and effect of loneliness.
This can make it a challenge to distinguish the effects of ill health and mobility issues on social isolation and vice versa. Befriending schemes and intergenerational projects are a great way to help overcome this cause of elderly loneliness and social isolation.

4. Lack of transport

As well as often becoming less physically mobile as age, our ability to drive our own car can sadly be another cause of loneliness. For those living in rural areas, this is particularly challenging as they may not live anywhere near a bus route either. Often, one of our main modes of social contact is through leaving the home.
Therefore, losing the ability to head out can reduce social contact for people and cause them to feel lonely and isolated. Joining an online community can be helpful. It can allow you to discuss issues with your peers. You may also find you feel more connected without having to leave the home.
Loneliness does not discriminate. However, as we get older, we face many more challenges that increase the risk of us feeling lonely. Finding new ways to meaningfully connect with others is the best way to help us defend against the causes and effects of elderly loneliness.


 

 

Lottie Miles

 



 
About the Author: Lottie Miles
 
Lottie Miles is a professional researcher and writer with a passion for human rights. She has 4 years of experience working within the NGO sector and has a Masters Degree in Social Policy. She has a keen interest in exploring ways in which happiness habits can help to improve mental health and wellbeing. In her spare time, she likes doing crossword puzzles, painting and traveling.
 
Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 


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 Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

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If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 
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publicado por achama às 20:02
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Sábado, 11 / 04 / 20

How to Cope with Social Isolation and Loneliness?

How to Cope with Social Isolation and Loneliness? 

An Astronaut’s Guide.

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

April 10th, 2020

 


In these wildly unexpected times, we’re all experiencing loneliness in a way we’ve never done before. Social isolation and loneliness are brand new to most of us and even the most introverted amongst us aren’t having much fun anymore.
As humans, we’re social creatures, we love to be around others. Unless you’re lucky enough to live with everyone who means something to you, you’re probably craving some more contact. The days feel long, and the loneliness keeps growing. But, if you think social isolation in your home is hard, try doing it in space, thousands of miles from Earth and normal human interaction.
Social Isolation and Loneliness in Space: an Astronaut’s View
Dr. D. Marshall Porterfield was a professor of Agricultural and Biological Engineering at Purdue University in Indiana, USA. He is currently the Director of Space Life and Physical Science at NASA, which took him all the way to the International Space Station (ISS). Dr. Porterfield is now an expert on coping with loneliness and social isolation. In his interview with Lifehacker, he gave a helpful piece of advice for getting through these difficult times.

What Can an Astronaut Teach Us?

As difficult as we think we have it now, I think it’s fair to say that being in outer space must be harder. The available room for an astronaut is much smaller than most of our homes, so it’s easy to feel claustrophobic and cramped.
You might also be sharing that space with a few strangers, and sometimes they might all speak different languages. While some company could help us feel less loneliness, but we all know that it’s easy to feel lonely even in a crowded room.
While we might get to wave at a neighbor or pass by others when we stretch our legs outside, astronauts don’t get those luxuries. They’re in completely unfamiliar environments while we’re in our own homes. We’re alone together in our social isolation, they’re alone in the universe.
It’s not a competition though, we’re all struggling down here on Earth too. Fortunately for us, astronauts have seen it all. They’re the leading experts in coping with social isolation and loneliness, and they’ve finally shared their secrets.

An Astronaut’s Secret Tips for Coping with Social Isolation and Loneliness

Keep a Routine

Dr. Porterfield says that all astronauts have strict schedules filled with activities, sometimes they’re even organized as far as every 5 minutes. Structure is important to avoid feeling lost and hopeless. Instead of dwelling on the loneliness, it’s recommended that you have plans in place to keep you busy.
When you’re not able to get out and about, each day can feel scary and uncertain. Our astronaut suggests that you have a time to wake up, a time to get moving, and always have a time for things that make you feel happy every day. That’s not to say that every day should look the same, but try to have a sort of plan before you go to bed the day before.
Nothing needs to be organized as strictly as the astronaut’s schedule but having a plan will help to reduce the daunting nature of the days and ease your time in social isolation.

Stay Active

Astronauts get 2 hours of exercise a day, Dr. D. Marshall Porterfield says. Fortunately, exercising here on Earth is much easier than on the International Space Station.
Depending on where you are, you might even be allowed a little time to exercise outside. If you can, this is the best bet and not something to be taken for granted. Follow your government’s guidelines and stay away from others, but if you can get those endorphins flowing and get some fresh air at the same time, do it. If outdoors isn’t what you want or isn’t allowed, then there are endless possibilities online! From gym-style workouts to yoga and dance, there are so many at-home versions of your favorite exercises right at your fingertips.
Exercising regularly reduces your risk of developing a whole host of life-threatening conditions and illnesses, such as heart disease, stroke, and cancer. Possibly more importantly given our social isolation situation, exercising is incredibly beneficial for your psychological health. Stave off loneliness, depression, and anxiety whilst boosting your mood and improving your sleep.
Dr. Porterfield says that even if you have never been much of an exerciser, now is a great time to start. This time could be life-changing for the better!

Keep in Contact with Your Loved Ones

You’re probably missing some people quite a bit right now. You might even be missing people you never thought you would. Loneliness can come on quickly when you’re separated from the people you love, even if you’re not living alone.
Even on the International Space Station, astronauts keep in close contact with their friends and family back home. These kinds of interactions should be a priority for your mental health. You don’t need to be in physical contact with people to fight loneliness. A simple phone call can keep your mood high.
Small interactions with the people you miss and just letting them know you’re thinking of them is important, Porterfield says. It’s easy to feel alone in social isolation, but it’s even easier to learn that you aren’t. While you’re physically distant from others, you can always ensure you’re never emotionally distant.

Find Your Purpose

Dr. Porterfield says that in order to fight the hopelessness and stay motivated amid the social distancing loneliness, you should find your purpose for doing it. Astronauts might suffer out in space, but they know why they’re doing it and are motivated to keep going.
It might be harder to see our purpose when you’re just stuck at home, but there is one. By preventing further spread, we’re stopping our health services from getting overwhelmed and helping to save lives. If you need a purpose to motivate you to stick it out through the discomfort of social isolation, what better one than saving lives? Maybe it’s your grandparents, vulnerable friends or family, or maybe you just love your community and want to help it survive.
Whatever your purpose is, remember it and hold it close. This is what will help you stay strong on the hardest days.
Loneliness is getting to us all; you aren’t alone in your struggle. Reach out to loved ones, keep the people you care about close. Social isolation and loneliness are hard, but we will get back to normal eventually. Until then we keep moving, and we keep remembering why we’re doing this. Stay home, save lives.
 
 
 
 

 

Becky Storey
 

 



 

About the Author: Becky Storey
 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 


Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

 Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

 Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

 Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 
Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 
 
 

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Sexta-feira, 10 / 04 / 20

Spiritual Loneliness: The Most Profound Type of Loneliness.

Spiritual Loneliness: 

The Most Profound Type of Loneliness.

By Anna LeMind, M.A.

April 9th, 2020

.

 

 

Loneliness is more widespread today than ever before. In our modern world, we are staying virtually connected all the time but feel more detached from each other in real life. Many people find themselves socially and emotionally lonely, but few know what spiritual loneliness is.
Recent events have further heightened the feelings of loneliness. Social distancing measures require us to stay at home and avoid unnecessary contact with other people. With this mandatory isolation, it makes sense why you might be feeling lonely right now, especially if you are an outgoing person.
But did you know that loneliness has many facets? And today, we will talk about the most profound and painful one – the spiritual loneliness.

4 Types of Loneliness

I believe there are four basic types of loneliness:
  1. Social loneliness: the most common type. You could be feeling socially lonely right now when you are stuck in your home and can’t see your friends or family. You can also experience it when you lack social connections or activities.
  2. Emotional loneliness: doesn’t necessarily involve being alone or lacking connections. You could have friends and family but feel emotionally disconnected from them. It comes from a lack of understanding and the inability to relate to those around you.
  3. Mental loneliness: the inability to discuss things that feel important and interesting to you with other people. Similarly to emotional loneliness, it can come from a lack of understanding – but in an intellectual sense of it. A lack of intellectually compatible or like-minded individuals to share your interests and views with.
  4. Spiritual loneliness: doesn’t come from a lack of social or emotional connections. An overall feeling of detachment from everyone and belonging nowhere. Feeling that your life is incomplete and lacks meaning. A vague sense of longing, but you can’t say what or who you long for.

How Does Spiritual Loneliness Feel?

While the other types of loneliness tend to be temporary and occur only in certain periods of your life, spiritual one is not. This feeling haunts you for a lifetime. You may not experience it every day, but you know it is always there and sooner or later, it will show up again.
Here are a few symptoms of spiritual loneliness:

Life is passing you by

It may seem like life is passing you by and everyone else participates in something you are a stranger to. You may feel disconnected from reality and clueless about life while everyone else seems to know what they are doing.
No matter what you do, where you are or who you are with, it feels not enough. As if you long for some unknown place, person or thing. Like there is something bigger, deeper and more meaningful and your life lacks it.

Longing for unknown somewhere and belonging nowhere

There is a beautiful Welsh word “Hiraeth”, which stands for a longing for home. However, it describes a very specific type of homesickness – for something that no longer exists or may have never existed. Hiraeth could be a longing for the homeland of your ancestors you have never been to.
I believe this word perfectly describes the feeling of spiritual loneliness. It’s like you don’t belong in this world and your place is somewhere else, far from here, but you don’t know where this is.
You may have felt this way when gazing into the starry sky on a dark summer night. It’s as if some far-away unknown homeland is calling you through the depths of the universe. However, with spiritual loneliness, you feel this way on a regular basis, not only when you look at the sky.

Detachment from everyone

Spiritual loneliness gets even more intense when you are surrounded by other people. You feel that you just can’t relate to them no matter what you do.
Have you ever been in the company of people you barely know who were discussing something you didn’t have a clue about? For example, their common acquaintance or a hobby they share. So you just sat there feeling a total stranger, unable to take part in the conversation. In situations like this, anyone would feel lonely.
But as a spiritually lonely person, this is your normal emotional state when you are with other people, especially at a large social gathering. It’s like there is an invisible wall that separates you from others.
In this example with the group discussion, the energies of people who participate in the conversation sort of unite into one big sphere. And you remain outside of this sphere. Everyone is connected with each other – but you. You always play the role of an outside observer.
This is what spiritual loneliness feels like.

The Spiritual Loneliness of Deep Thinkers

I believe this type of loneliness affects deep thinkers in the first place. All those people who are prone to reflection, self-analysis and overthinking. Visionaries, romantics and dreamers. It’s not a coincidence that many writers refer to spiritual loneliness in their literary works, even though they don’t use this specific word for it.For example, Russian existentialist author Fyodor Dostoevsky writes in his famous novel “Idiot”: 
What had so tormented him was the idea that he was a stranger to all this, that he was outside this glorious festival. What was this universe? What was this grand, eternal pageant to which he had yearned from his childhood up, and in which he could never take part? […]
Everything knew its path and loved it, went forth with a song and returned with a song; only he knew nothing, understood nothing, neither men nor words nor any of nature’s voices; he was a stranger and an outcast.
Albert Einstein, a genius physicist who was also an INTP and a deep thinker, probably suffered from spiritual loneliness too. He said:
It is strange to be known so universally and yet to be so lonely.

Is It Possible to Overcome Spiritual Loneliness?

If you are a spiritually lonely person, there is no ‘magic’ way to stop being one once and for all. There are only ways to silence this pain of not belonging. The problem with spiritual loneliness is that you can’t find what exactly is missing from your life and what you long for.
You know those times when you try to remember an exciting dream you just had, but no matter how hard you try, it just slips away from your mind. This is how it goes with spiritual loneliness. No matter how hard you try to find its source, you can’t. It’s just the way it is.
For example, a way to end social loneliness is to go out more often and make new connections. Emotional loneliness is more tricky, but it is still possible to find people you can relate to and who will understand you. With mental loneliness, all it takes is to find a like-minded person to have deep conversations with. Not easy, but achievable.
But as for spiritual loneliness, you can’t solve a problem without knowing its cause. And the existential depth of this loneliness makes it difficult to deal with.
In my experience, the only way to cope with it is to accept it.
Accept the fact that spiritual loneliness will be your lifetime companion. Make friends with it. When it shows up, don’t try to get rid of it. This will only lead to resentment and bottled emotions. Instead, let yourself feel it in all its depth.
At some point, you will get used to it. You will see how pain and darkness turn into bittersweet nostalgia and melancholic thoughtfulness.
And most importantly, if you relate to the above, remember that no matter how spiritually lonely you are, you are not alone.
 

Anna LeMind
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

About the Author: Anna LeMind

Anna is the founder and lead editor of the website Learning-mind.com. She is passionate about learning new things and reflecting on thought-provoking ideas. She writes about science, psychology and other related topics. She is particularly interested in topics regarding introversion, consciousness and subconscious, perception, human mind's potential, as well as the nature of reality and the universe.
 

Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 


Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:
 
 
Main Site: violetflame.biz.ly
 
 
 
No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.
 
 
Discernment is recommended.
 
 
All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 
 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 
 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 04:22
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Segunda-feira, 17 / 02 / 20

Studies Confirm the Link Between the Use of Social Media and Isolation

Studies Confirm the Link Between the Use of Social Media and Isolation

Lottie Miles.

learning-mind.com

Posted February 17th, 2020.

 
social media and isolation.

 

 
From the UK to the US and all the way to India, numerous studies confirm links between social media and loneliness, depression, and anxiety. But how can social media use cause social isolation? Why is social media so bad for our mental health? And does this mean we need to completely cut social media out of our lives?
 
This post explores why social media and loneliness are linked. We will also look at how to make sure using social media doesn’t leave you feeling isolated or depressed.
 
How are isolation and social media connected?
 
Looking at perfect profiles and dream holiday images online often inspires feelings of envy and missing out. As such, it is easy to see how social media and feeling isolated can be connected. We might also see people at an event we didn’t get an invite to and feel lonely. However, when we look at sites like Facebook or Instagram, we only ever see an idealized version of reality.
 
At an instinctive level, many people probably recognize that social media can have negative effects on our mental health. Our online behavior also massively affects our self-image. However, whilst this is backed up by numerous studies, things could be even worse.
 
Indeed, a 2018 study found that heavy social media use can actually increase feelings of social isolation by three times. Because isolation is linked with a heightened risk of morbidity, this shows the potentially disastrous effects of excessive social media use.
 
This study had a sample of 1,787 participants who were aged 19-32. They asked them about their use of the top 11 social media platforms including Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat. Those that visited social networks more than 58 times every week were three times as likely to feel lonely when compared with people doing so under 9 times a week.
 
However, this study was unable to conclude whether social isolation was caused by social media use or whether lonely people used social media more.
 
Is there a causal link between loneliness and social media use?
 
A study for the University of Pennsylvania found supporting evidence that social media and isolation are linked. They even found evidence of causation rather than just a correlation between feeling lonely and isolated and social media use.
 
From a sample of 140 undergraduates, participants were asked to either limit or increase their regular social media use. Questionnaires completed before and after the study helped reveal that increases in anxiety, depression, and loneliness stemmed from a fear of missing out, what people call FOMO.
 
The Pennsylvania study did find that people with higher depression levels were the worst affected. However, ultimately, anyone using social media often also suffered. FOMO leads us to compulsively check for social media updates. It also inhibits our ability to relax and reduces the time we can actually spend socially. In comparison, the participants asked to limit their use of social media reported reduced depression and loneliness.
 
Because social media use increases our tendency to socially compare and gives us less time for real-life social interactions, reducing our social media use can help us feel less lonely. Distractions can also decrease our enjoyment of present situations, according to a study for the University of British Columbia. However, does this mean we should just stop using social media altogether?
 
Should we cut social media out of our lives?
 
Interestingly, the studies above do not conclude that social media use needs to be completely ended. They simply found that our use of social media should be curtailed. In addition, phenomena like the friendship paradox suggest that we should seek to avoid making constant comparisons between ourselves and others if we are to improve our mental wellbeing.
 
Other studies have also found positive effects of social media in terms of connectedness as we get older. For example, a 2019 study looking at “the association between the use of online social networks sites and perceived social isolation among individuals in the second half of life” in Germany offers some hope.
 
They found that their sample of people over 40 who were daily users of social media scored lower isolation scores compared to those with no social media use. Another University of Luxembourgstudy also found potential benefits for clinical practice and advancing health knowledge amongst older adults.
 
Another study found that adolescents using Instagram actually felt more appreciated. They also felt closer to others thanks to their use of the platform. This suggests that social media use does not have to cause isolation if we focus on quality over quantity. A University of Missouri-Columbia studyalso backed this up. Indeed, they found social media didn’t always and sometimes didn’t have negative effects on social wellbeing.
 
Summing Up
 
Numerous studies have confirmed the link between the use of social media and isolation. Moreover, some studies have even found evidence of a causal relationship between how much time we spend on social media and how isolated we feel. However, social media can make making connections easier. Depending on how we use it, it can also help us feel more connected with others.
 
The important thing is to avoid the temptation to compare ourselves with others. We should also seek to reduce the overall time we spend using social media platforms. When we do this, we free up more time for real-life interactions and free ourselves from distraction to enjoy present moments of pleasure and joy.
 
 

Lottie Miles

 


 
About the Author: Lottie Miles
 
Lottie Miles is a professional researcher and writer with a passion for human rights. She has 4 years of experience working within the NGO sector and has a Masters Degree in Social Policy. She has a keen interest in exploring ways in which happiness habits can help to improve mental health and wellbeing. In her spare time, she likes doing crossword puzzles, painting and traveling.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 


Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:
No religious or political creed is advocated here.

 Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

 Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

 Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 
Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 
 
 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 
 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 19:44
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Quinta-feira, 21 / 11 / 19

6 Types of Loneliness and Different Causes of This Universal Feeling

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

November 20th, 2019.

 



 
Loneliness is something we’re all familiar with. It’s almost a compulsory part of the human experience. But, did you know that there are many different types and causes of loneliness? Loneliness isn’t just one blanket feeling, it can be brought on by all sorts of experiences, not just from being alone.
 
Knowing why you feel lonely is the key to resolving it. Finding out what type is causing your loneliness will allow you to start regaining what was lost.
 
6 Types of Loneliness
 
New Situation Loneliness
 
When you move to a new place, start a new job, or join a new school, you suddenly find yourself alone. When you haven’t made any real connections, you’re forced to spend most of your time in these new places without anyone by your side. This is a very lonely experience. Fortunately, we know deep down that this type of loneliness is temporary. It is part of the transition phase, from your past chapters to your new one.
 
This type of loneliness isn’t chronic or, hopefully, too insufferable. When you put yourself out there, the loneliness will fade away. It’s only a matter of time before you start to feel included, and surrounded by company, again.
Surrounded but Lonely
 
So many of us can relate to the feeling of being surrounded by people we love, and who love us and still feeling existential loneliness. Unlike in a new situation, this type of loneliness occurs when everything around us is familiar. We know the people and we know the places, but we just can’t fit in.
 
For example, you could be in a family full of academics. They love you deeply and you love them, but you’re not interested in their academia. You prefer art maybe, or music. In situations like this, you might feel lonely because you can’t join in on their conversations. You also crave company that shares your interests. The case is similar in groups with mixed religious beliefs.
 
When you have no one to relate to, it doesn’t really matter how surrounded by others you are. Loneliness can be an emotional experience, entirely unrelated to how physically alone, or not, you are.
 
Left Behind Loneliness
 
Everyone goes through phases in life. We all progress to new chapters and have new experiences, but we all do this at different speeds. While some of our friends might be settling down and moving on, we could be taking some stages a little slower. It’s totally okay to take life at your own pace, but it can mean that we often feel like we’ve been left behind.
 
When the people we usually rely on for company suddenly disappear to new jobs, new lives and new adventures, they have less time for us. This kind of loneliness could be literally applied when our friends become so busy that they genuinely can’t spend any time with you.
 
It could also be metaphorical, similar to the idea of being surrounded but still feeling alone. If your friends have started families or gotten “proper” jobs before you, then you’ll likely feel loneliness due to suddenly having less in common. This type of loneliness stems from feeling like everyone is too busy for you or that you’re not a priority anymore.
 
Missing Presence Loneliness
 
Have you ever lost someone who used to fill a space in your home? When they go, whether it’s through death or a break-up or just moving away, they leave behind a void. This type of loneliness differs from the rest because it doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t matter whether you have hundreds of other people who love you or none at all. When that one special person is missing, that’s all that matters.
 
We feel a kind of loneliness that is unaffected by the outside world when we’re rattling around alone in our homes. In some cases, people will even avoid going home, to prevent having to miss their presence. There’s a quiet companionship that comes with living with others, even animals, and when that’s taken away it leaves a hole.
 
Emotional Loneliness
 
Emotional loneliness presents itself when we have no one significant in our lives to share our emotions with. This differs from the other types of loneliness. You could have plenty of friends, but it’s a depth that’s missing. It appears when friendships are superficial or only surface level.
 
We aren’t longing for company; we’re just longing for connection. We all face difficulties and traumas, and we all deserve someone to share them with to help us heal.
 
We feel so lonely without this kind of deep connection. Sometimes the people in our lives just aren’t that emotionally committed to us. Some friends and family are enough to keep us happy and in good company but don’t have the time or depth to take on our emotional needs.
 
We feel a sense of loneliness because we aren’t able to really share ourselves. We’re alone in the sense that we can’t share, and that can be a very ostracizing experience.
 
Romantic Loneliness
 
Romantic loneliness is a common and probably the most relatable of all the types of loneliness. It exists independent of friendships and family company. As a part of human nature, we crave the company and intimacy of a romantic relationship. There is just another layer of companionship that friends can’t provide us, so we long for love.
 
Have you ever been the third wheel when hanging out with friends? These kinds of moments make us feel lonely, despite not being alone. We have a feeling of loneliness because we’re missing a portion of what life could offer. We’re missing that deep connection with another person.
 
Returning to an empty bed every night can be a lonely experience. Only a true romantic connection can relieve the intense feeling of loneliness which results from watching your friends settle down and cozy up without you.
 
Loneliness is a universally understood feeling. From children to the elderly, the rich and the poor, loneliness doesn’t discriminate. You’re never alone, though. There are so many different types of loneliness. No experience is the same, but no feeling is too exclusive either.
 
References:
 
 

Becky Storey


 



 

About the Author: Becky Storey
 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 


Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

 Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

 Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

 Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 
Please respect all credits.

 
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All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 
 
 

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publicado por achama às 16:12
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Sábado, 16 / 11 / 19

5 Reasons Behind Oversharing on Social Media and How to Stop It

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

November 15th, 2019.

 



 
We love social media. It is an undeniable part of daily life now, and for the most part, that’s okay. Unfortunately, sometimes it can all get too much and we start oversharing personal things on social media.
 
We all know someone whose social media is flooded with stories that are too personal and too detailed to be shared so publicly. There are people who share every minor moment.
 
Oversharing on social media is common and there are some serious psychological reasons behind why we do it.
 
Oversharing can be dangerous. Not only are we often giving away private information like our location, but we’re also often saying things that could jeopardize our jobs. Even when our settings are set to private, there’s usually always a way for our information to be shared publicly without our consent.
 
Anonymity
 
One of the most straight forward reasons behind oversharing on social media is this: no one has to know who you are. Social media sometimes feels a little like shouting into the void, as if no one will hear it.
 
When we overshare on our social media accounts, we experience a delay in returned communication. We don’t have to face the repercussions of our confessions immediately like we would if we revealed a secret in person. We don’t have to see the faces of others and we don’t have to experience the awkwardness.
 
Sometimes, when we overshare on social media, we also fill in our own blanks. We can decide how others will react without ever having to hear it for real.
 
Because of this anonymity, we can overshare all sorts of sordid details about our lives. When we’re posting under our own name, the world seems too far away to notice us. If we want more secrecy, we can even disguise our name.
 
Our voices are diluted online, allowing us to yell our secrets into a crowd of millions. It feels private, even when it’s incredibly public.
 
A Lack of Authority
 
Unlike at work, school, or even at home, there are no authority figures online. Social media is a free-for-all. We can overshare all we like because there’s no one to stop us.
 
Free speech isn’t always a good thing though. We reveal our political alliances, our morals, and values like it’s nothing. In public, we’d never open up with such personal details until we really knew a person.
 
We also forget that social media isn’t all that private. Although our bosses, teachers, and parents might not be watching us in person, there’s no real way to hide our words from them, even if they don’t follow our accounts directly.
Egocentricity
 
Of course, we all assume that anyone who overshares on social media is doing it for attention. We wouldn’t always be wrong on this theory, though I like to pretend that it’s not an all too common reason. Sometimes though, people just want their 15 minutes of fame.
 
As humans, we crave attention. We want to be in people’s thoughts, and we love to know that others are looking, hopefully admiringly, at us. We usually want our selfies, stories and hilarious tweets to catch someone’s attention and bring us some notoriety.
 
On the other hand, some people overshare every detail because they genuinely believe other people care. Sometimes, a person’s narcissistic nature means they think even their most mundane moments are important.
 
These people thrive off the approval that comes from a “like” even when it was done out of habit or kindness, rather than genuine interest.
 
Low Self-Esteem
 
 
In contrast to the self-centered reasons for some, low self-esteem is a common reason why others might overshare on social media. When we’re feeling down about ourselves, we seek the reassurance and approval of others.
 
When someone feels insecure about their image, they seek out compliments, or even just passive likes, as a way of feeling better. One selfie can bring instant reassurance that people do “like” the way we look. The rush we get from this approval makes us want to do it again, and ultimately overshare ourselves.
 
Similarly, we tend to always display what we feel are our best qualities and moments. When we do something we think is interesting or take a selfie we think is attractive, we post it far and wide, so as many people as possible will see it.
 
We overshare all sorts of things that don’t need to be seen by acquaintances we’ve long forgotten, but we want them to see it. We want to be seen as cool or attractive, even if it’s not real.
 
It’s a sort of “say it enough times and you’ll start to believe it” situation. We’ll flood our social media accounts with too much information or too many pictures, hoping the quantity will amount to someone, somewhere, thinking that’s who we really are.
 
The same applies to low self-esteem resulting from our personalities, achievements and life situations. Sometimes, when we post self-deprecating statuses or pictures with sad captions, we get a rush of support.
 
The flood of compliments, pep talks and love are addictive. This leads people to keep oversharing deeper and deeper personal stories on social media, just to receive some reassurance that we aren’t as bad as we feel.
Loneliness
 
In a not too different way, we could be oversharing on social media because we feel alone. Social media gives us an opportunity to tell the world our stories without the repercussions we would have in real life. When we speak out about our secrets, our problems and our concerns, we often learn that we aren’t alone.
 
Often, people take to their social media accounts to reveal things. They’re then met with a community of people who feel the same or have experienced the same thing. Suddenly, they’re not alone anymore. Oversharing isn’t always a terrible thing, as long as it’s met by likeminded people.
 
There are forums and groups on social media sites that cater to every story, and thus, oversharing is welcomed because it’s falling on ears that want to hear it.
 
Be careful what you overshare online because you can’t take it back. Social media is an incredible place to share your story but consider this rule: never post anything you wouldn’t want your grandmother to see. If she shouldn’t see it, neither should acquaintances from years gone by.
 
Once you’ve worked out your reasons for it, you can fix those instead of turning to your social media accounts.
 
References:
 
Becky Storey

 



 

About the Author: Becky Storey
 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 


Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:
No religious or political creed is advocated here.

 Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

 Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

 Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 
Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 
 
 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 
 
 
 
Free counters!

  geoglobe1
 
 
tags: , , , , , , , , , ,
publicado por achama às 23:10
link do post | comentar | favorito
Segunda-feira, 24 / 06 / 19

If You Feel Like an Outsider as an Introvert, This Is the Perfect Book for You ~Sofia



If You Feel Like an Outsider as an Introvert, This Is the Perfect Book for You.



 

 

By Sofia, Learning Mind, 

June 24, 2019

 

   outsider introvert 

 

 


 





Colin Wilson was ever the Outsider. As he huddled in his frigid room in Brockley, a South London suburb, alone on Christmas Day, he contemplated his position. He was alone, in isolation.
He had no family or close relation to share that Christmas with. His girlfriend was at her parents’ house, and he did not want to see his. For the millionth time in his twenty-four years of age, he felt like an Outsider.
And as he contemplated, he began to write what would later turn into a book that has been translated in over thirty languages and has never been out of print to this day. The book’s title was “The Outsider”.

In a later print of “The Outsider”, Wilson wrote in the introduction:

“It struck me that I was in the position of so many of my favourite characters in fiction: Dostoevsky’s Raskolnikov, Rilke’s Malte Laurids Brigge, the young writer in Hamsun’s Hunger: alone in my room, feeling totally cut off from the rest of society. It was not a position I relished…”
Wilson had never received a fully formal education. He descended from a working-class family and lived almost penniless in London. “The Outsider” was written in the reading room of the British Museum, as the writer slept in a sleeping bag on Hampstead Heath.
A voracious reader since a young age and an autodidact, Wilson felt an affinity towards the perennial, literary Outsider all too well. Like many introverts and consequent outsiders, he experienced feelings of intense alienation and could relate to a large number of literary heroes.
Through their case studies, Wilson attempted to make a clear shape out of the outsider’s problem and exclusion from society. At the same time, he attempts a solution to the outsider’s problem.

The core of his ideas goes something like this:

Who is the Outsider?

 
1. Feelings of isolation, of being “out of sync with the world”, pervade the Outsider’s psyche. A lot of us can relate to this. Feeling misunderstood, lost in translation. Experiencing the society and others around us as something very overwhelming that we are unable to connect to.
The conventions and customs of one’s time seem absurd, at best, despairing at worst. The Outsider, Wilson wrote, is an individual who can see in a country filled with blind men.
It’s a feeling familiar to introverts everywhere. Most of the time, one feels like they’re looking at the world through a partition glass. Always one step behind in a dance that others seem to know all the steps to, always just a tiny bit out of touch.
This is especially true for the outsider who is thrust in a society which favors extroversion. It’s a bane of our modern civilization; we promote productiveness, efficiency, networking. There’s no time or space for introspection, for finetuning with things belonging somewhere outside the material world.
Today more than ever, there is no space for introverts. They are labelled “Outsiders”, throughout history.

The fallen Outsider

 
dont belong here
2. The problem lies in the very same thing that renders The Outsider exceptional; his (or her) heightened perception. For the Outsider can feel, and see but never express or comprehend, much less have the skill necessary to communicate their findings to their fellow men.
It’s a very frustrating conundrum, really. Introverted individuals can be extremely perceptive and uncover truths that are difficult to articulate about their fellow humans, or about the world in general. This, unfortunately, requires tremendous reserves of spiritual and mental energy and leaves one drained really easily.
More often than not, outsiders and introverts give all of their focus to the task or person at hand, leading to the forging of deeper, more intimate bonds with others. Quality wins over quantity.
But in a world that always wants more, this can be a double-edged sword. The introvert becomes “unsociable”, “boring”, “strange and unusual”.
That is to say, the fallen Outsider is imbalanced. This can have many disadvantageous effects, such as mental struggles and negative feelings, or hurdles in integrating with other people.
How does one achieve balance then? How does one acquire the self-sufficiency necessary to not be brought down by the state of the world, by the loneliness?

How to harness your introversion

 
3. Via “the great synthesis”, Wilson responds. In his opinion, the Outsider ought to look further, deeper, with an unprecedented intensity. He must acquire the vision to match his heightened perception.
It’s all about embracing who you are.
By plunging into his own depths, the introvert, the Outsider, may find the vision he so needs to make sense of everything. In making every moment count as a mystical, almost religious experience, the Outsider breaks free from his vicious cycle.
This means that the introvert need not feel inferior or lesser than, on account of being different. It is that precise difference that makes introverts see the world differently. And seeing the world differently is beneficial to all because it helps us attribute new, creative meaning to our experiences and environment!
happy alone
Perceiving the world with depth is necessary to survive, and intensity is something the majority of people desire and spend large amounts in trying to achieve it. In a world plagued by shallowness, the Outsider has one-upped everyone else.
We need introverts and Outsiders to embrace and harness their ways of seeing. We need people in touch with their inner self, with their emotions. They are the expedition leaders in the vast jungle of the human condition.
Sadly, even though the book catapulted Wilson into fame and counted him as member of “the Angry Young Men”, a new generation of promising British writers, the success did not last long.
The press and critics cannibalized Wilson and for the remainder of his life refused to take him seriously. He became, once again, an Outsider. But he never stopped working towards his own vision, leaving behind a prolific body of work.

Introverts can learn a lot from the book for a number of reasons.

The most obvious one is that an introvert is inherently an Outsider; always a bit out of touch with the noise and clamor of the rest. It is not a stretch to say that introverts experience a lot of the same negative emotions Wilson’s Outsider does.
In today’s fast-paced and production-oriented world, it can be hard to gain a more spiritual vision on life. It can be very easy, meanwhile, to feel like the madman in an oppressing crowd that does not understand.
If you’ve ever felt that way, maybe the Outsider is for you. Maybe it’ll help you break free.
References:
  1. The Guardian
  2. Enotes
 

 

About the Author: Sofia

 

Sofia has a bachelor degree in law. She is moonlighting as a writer and aspiring to one day gather enough experiences and turn them into ink and paper. The intricacies of the human mind and its peculiar ways have always fascinated her and urged her to explore more, not only humans but humanity as a whole, hopefully leading her to interesting findings. She is a literature, music and movie geek to boot.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. 
All rights reserved. 
For permission to reprint, contact us.


Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 

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Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 17:48
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LAR
A Luz está a revelar a Verdade, e esta libertar-nos-á! -Só é real o AMOR Incondicional. -Quando o Amor superar o amor pelo poder, o mundo conhecerá a Paz; Jimi Hendrix. -Somos almas a ter uma experiência humana!

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