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Segunda-feira, 13 / 01 / 20

Why Letting Go of Grudges Is Crucial for Your Happiness and How to Do It

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

January 10, 2020

 



 
 
I think it’s fair to say that we’ve all been wronged in some way. Whether it’s a nasty break-up, betrayal by a friend, or an old school bully, once we hold a grudge against them, it’s hard to let go. Letting go of grudges is good for our health, but it’s hard to do.
 
We say we’ve forgiven, but we don’t forget. Sometimes, a grudge can last a lifetime. It’s time to start letting go of the grudges we hold and start fresh with a healthier new outlook.
 
 
We hold grudges for a whole host of reasons. Psychologists have suggested that we use grudges to define ourselves and excuse our bad behavior. We write off our coldness, mistrust and sometimes plain rudeness, as the result of past hurt.
 
Some suggest that we are holding grudges as a subconscious way to get sympathy and extra kindnessthat we didn’t get initially. This is especially true with victims of school-aged bullies. At the time, there was little support for the hardship. As an adult, if we tell our stories, others will feel bad for us. We hold onto our grudges towards these bullies, so we can keep re-telling the story.
 
While those reasons might require more intensive thought, some other reasons can be more superficial. We might consider holding a grudge to be a form of revenge. Never letting go of the grudge means never letting the offender get away with their crimes.
 
The reality is, those who wronged you probably aren’t even aware of your reserved hostility, or even worse, they don’t care. Instead of holding onto this pain, perhaps it’s time to work on letting go of these grudges.
 
Why Letting Go of Grudges Is Crucial for Your Happiness
 
They Serve No Purpose
 
If psychologists are correct in their theories on holding grudges, then we can see that the reasons are never beneficial. Holding onto the anger or pain won’t help us to heal from the hurt. It won’t undo the damage done in the past.
 
Grudges won’t serve as a kind of revenge. Even if the offender is begging for forgiveness, there is no benefit to YOU by never letting go of the grudge.
 
They’re Bad for Your Health
 
A number of studies have shown that holding onto grudges can cause a serious decline in health. Having a grudge to carry with you means you’re repeatedly becoming angry every time the memory comes to your mind. We certainly all know by now that anger has a negative effect on our health. Constantly recurring anger is dangerous.
 
Anger, and in turn holding grudges, can lead to increases in heart rate and blood pressure. When we’re angered, our body’s stress response is triggered, leading to a whole host of unhealthy chemical reactions inside us. If you want to keep your body healthy and safe, you’d better start letting go of some grudges.
 
They Consume Us
 
Grudges are just pain that we carry with us everywhere. As well as the toll they take on our psychical body, they also have negative impacts on our mental health too. Negative thoughts take over from positive ones usually. They consume more of our time and fill our minds with a negative voice.
 
Overthinking the causes, possible solutions, and the revenge you crave will make it harder for your brain to function. Your usually clear thinking will be swallowed whole by the anger and frustration you let ruminate in your mind all day.
 
Not letting go of your grudges will lead to anger, mistrust, and resentment leaking out into your current life. Your personal relationships will suffer. Your career will suffer. Progression can only happen when you untie yourself from the past.
 
How to Start Letting Go of Grudges
 
Take Charge of Your Needs
 
Instead of letting the hurt swirl around your mind all day and night, try going after what you really need to solve this problem. Depending on the length of your grudge and the situation you’re in, talking it out might not be an option.
 
Instead, try talking to yourself. If you can’t get closure, then you have to close the door yourself. This might be easier said than done, but it is possible. Remind yourself of what you’re losing by being angry so often. Notice how little you’re gaining.
 
If you are in a position to talk to the person who hurt you, then do. Be confident in yourself and your needs. Sometimes, you need closure for your wellbeing.
 
Tell this person how hurt you were by what they did and explain that it’s still chipping away at you. If they respond in kind, open up a dialogue. If they don’t, know your pain and this person were never worth it. Let go of this grudge.
 
Embrace Your Mental Strength
 
You can’t change the past. You can’t make the person who hurt you feel guilty. You can, however, change your own thinking. It’s time to get in touch with your own thoughts and slow them down when you feel angry.
 
Remember that your brain was able to create this pain, so it’s able to let it go too. Letting go of grudges is entirely down to you. It’s not going to be easy but letting go can be a choice. You can choose not to hate, or feel anger, anymore.
 
When the frustrated thoughts occur to you, breathe them out. Remind yourself that this person has no power, only you do. No more letting this person win, especially if they’re already out of your life.
 
Distract yourself when these thoughts occur and forbid yourself from dwelling on them. No more obsessing, no more giving any of your precious time to this person who did you wrong.
 
See It from Their Side
 
It might be tough, even painful to do, but sometimes it can be helpful to put yourself in their shoes. Understand what happened in the beginning from a neutral point of view and wonder about how you would have reacted from their side.
 
Remember, we have all done wrong in our lives. We’ve all caused hurt in some way, it’s almost guaranteed. We are flawed, and that’s okay. Don’t place yourself on such a high pedestal that you can never forgive others’ mistakes.
 
It’s also important to understand that a person rarely has malicious intentions when they hurt us, they just acted thoughtlessly or inconsiderately towards our feelings. Rarely are our offenders genuinely evil. Their behavior may have been wrong but trying to connect with the reasons behind their actions might help you find solace.
 
Find the Root Cause
 
Most of the time, when we’re having trouble letting go of a grudge, there’s a deeper cause that we’re missing. This pain we carry tends to reflect a deep value that we hold that has been violated.
 
It can be beneficial to learn why this matter hurts you so much. Once you understand what fundamental moral of yours has been violated, you can start letting go of this grudge. Deep dive into why this moral is so important.
 
Most importantly, if you feel that something essential to you has been violated, then you know this person doesn’t belong in your life or mind. They don’t deserve your thoughts, because, in the end, their choices do not line up with your beliefs and values.
 
Letting go of grudges can be hard, but holding on is dangerous. Allow yourself to release the past. Be optimistic about your future, without bearing the weight of an ancient grudge. You’ll be surprised to see just how prosperous you can be when your mind is free from the torture that is on-going anger.
 
 
References:
  1. https://www.usnews.com
  2. https://journals.sagepub.com
  3. https://www.psychologytoday.com
 

Becky Storey
 

 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


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publicado por achama às 05:00
Terça-feira, 07 / 01 / 20

I Had an Emotionally Unavailable Mother and Here’s What It Felt Like

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

January 7th, 2020.

 
EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE MOTHER.
 

 
 
Want to know what it feels like to be raised by an emotionally unavailable mother? Let me tell you my story.
 
Whenever someone asks me about my mother, I say ‘She died when I was young’. When they reply that they are so sorry, I always say ‘It doesn’t matter, she was an evil cow and I didn’t love her anyway. Most people are shocked.
 
Are you? If you are – why? You didn’t know her. You didn’t know what she was like. What it was like growing up with her. And before you say ‘Well yes that’s all very well, but she was your mother’, so what? Tell me what law or unwritten rule stipulates that I have to love my mother? There is none.
 
You might think it is disrespectful to talk the way I do. But those among you who have experienced an emotionally unavailable mother will understand my point of view. And believe me when I tell you that I tried my very hardest to love her.
 
What Is an Emotionally Unavailable Mother?
 
‘Emotionally unavailable mother’ to me is just a fancy psychological way of saying cold-hearted and unfeeling. But what is the difference between a mother who struggles sometimes to show her love and one that is emotionally unavailable? I can only tell you my story and it may appear cold and matter-of-fact.
 
But what if your mother never cuddled you or told you she loved you? Or actually even spoke to you that much? What if your mother used you as a means to earn money and her own personal housekeeper? How would you feel if she was abusive to your siblings and cold towards you? Perhaps then you might understand a little of how I feel.
 
So let me tell you a few stories about dear old mum. Maybe you’ll get where I’m coming from. Or perhaps you’ll think I’m being a total snowflake and I should just get over myself and stop blaming her for everything.
 
What It Feels Like to Have an Emotionally Unavailable Mother
 
No loving touch
 
I remember being very little, probably around 4 or 5 and craving my mother’s touch. She never touched me ever. Not a hug, a cuddle, nothing.
 
But she did do one thing and that was to come into my and my sisters’ bedrooms after a night out drinking and check we were all in bed. If our bedsheets were tangled, she would straighten them out.
 
This was an opportunity for me to receive a touch from my mother as sometimes if my arm was hanging out of the bed, she would put it back under the sheets. Imagine being this starved of a mother’s touch that you engineer a scenario where she might come into contact with you? And at that young age?
 
No response
 
Again, when I was young, I could write so I guess I was around the age of 5-6, I would leave little notes to my mother. The notes would say things like ‘I love you so much mum’ and ‘You are the best mum in the world’.
 
I would leave these love notes to my mother on her pillow on her bed so she would see them before she went to sleep. She never mentioned them. I would excitably go to bed and look under my pillow to see what she had left for me. After a few weeks, I stopped writing them.
 
Ignored wishes
 
I passed my 12+ which meant I could go to a local grammar school. There were two choices; an all-girls one which had a very posh reputation (not me at all, we lived on a council estate) or a local mixed grammar where all my friends were going.
 
Mother decided I was to attend the all-girls school. Despite my protests, she told me ‘It would look better on my CV later’ when I applied for jobs. Ironically, I wasn’t allowed to carry on and study for A-Levels. I had to work at the factory job she had found for me when I was 16 to help pay the household bills.
 
Can’t confide with your mother
 
I had a very bad time at grammar school. I didn’t know anyone. There were cliques of girls who had known one another from middle school and were quite happy to stay in their own little groups.
 
It got so bad that I ran away twice and went home. Each time my mother took me back to the school, no questions asked. The school did try to help but as far as mother was concerned I was to ‘get on with it’. I contemplated ending it all but got through it.
 
Some years later, mother and I were arguing and she had said she’d always done her best for me. I shouted back that because she’d sent me to that school I’d tried to top myself. I ran upstairs to my bedroom. She followed and for the first time in my life, she put her arm around me. It felt so odd and strange I felt physically sick and had to move away.
 
The Impact of Having a Mother Who Was Emotionally Unavailable
 
So that’s a little of my pity party story. There’s much more but a lot involves other people and that is their story to tell. So how am I affected and what do I do about it?
 
Well, I never wanted children. I don’t have a maternal bone in me. I am shown pictures of babies and I don’t get it. I don’t feel this flush of warmth or emotion. But show me a puppy or an animal in pain or distress and I am weeping like a baby. I think I feel emotionally attached to animals more because they have no voice. They can’t tell you what is wrong. I felt the same way during childhood.
 
I have a cold heart. I always say I have a heart of stone. Nothing touches it. I’ve formed this hard barrier around it so nothing will crack it. This is a survival technique I learned as a child. Don’t let anyone in and you won’t be hurt.
 
A late boyfriend of mine used to say to me ‘You are a hard nut to crack’ and I never knew what he meant but now I do. He also said that I was either clingy of hostile. This is also true. You are either everything to me or you are nothing.
 
As a child, I had an avoidant attachment style. I had spent a long time trying to get my mother’s attention. Having failed I shut down and become ambivalent about her. As an adult, this has transformed into a dismissive-avoidant style where I keep myself to myself. I avoid contact with others and keep emotions at arm’s length.
 
Despite the former tirade, I don’t blame my mother for anything.
 
In fact, I am thankful she had me. It was the 60s, she was out of wedlock and she could easily have not have done so.
 
I remind myself that I am not my mother. I understand the weaknesses of my upbringing and that allows me to cope with life as an adult.
 
Then, I have a tendency to shut myself away from people and have to try hard to socialise. The saying ‘better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all’ doesn’t apply to me. If there is a chance of losing love I won’t love in the first place.
 
I know why I have to be the centre of attention when I am in company. It is because I craved it as a child and never got it. Likewise, I like to shock people and see their reaction. This goes directly back to my mother. I would intentionally shock her when I was a teen. Just to try and get something out of her.
 
Final Thoughts
 
I think that we need to remember that emotional neglect from an unavailable mother can be as damaging as abuse and physical neglect. However, understanding how any kind of neglect has affected you is key to moving forward.

 

 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 17:23
Sexta-feira, 03 / 01 / 20

How to Stop Complaining All the Time with 4 No-Nonsense Strategies

Lauren Edwards-Fowle.

learning-mind.com

Posted January 3rd, 2020.

 

 
 
We are all guilty of complaining. Busy schedules, bad weather and stress mount up and cause us to lose sight of the positives around us. Focusing on the negatives, and compounding this by complaining only worsens our mood and outlook. The more we complain, the more problems we perceive. Knowing that it is healthy to have a positive mindset, and knowing how to stop complaining are unfortunately somewhat mutually exclusive!
 
Here are some strategies that can help you to stop complaining, and start living a happier and healthier life:
 
Manage your expectations
 
Often we complain because something hasn’t met with our expectations. We feel inconvenienced and disappointed, and express this through complaining.
 
In order to learn how to stop complaining, we need to rephrase what we expect from a situation to avoid becoming disenchanted with a scenario that we should have been anticipating all along.
Let’s look at an example:
 
You have a meeting. You arrive in good time and wait in reception. Half an hour later, you are still waiting. This is frustrating and you feel unappreciated. Why should you make the effort to make sure you are there in plenty of time, just to be left waiting?
 
Now you are annoyed, and decide to stand up for yourself by complaining. The meeting starts with a negative undertone, and you find it difficult to engage in a positive way. You are left in a bad mood for the remainder of the day, and resent any suggestion that a further meeting might be requested in the future.
How to rephrase:
 
Let’s take a minute here. Could there be a very good reason that you were left waiting? Perhaps there was an emergency situation that had to be dealt with, and unfortunately, impacted your appointment?
 
There are very often times when we are required to wait. This could be in advance of a meeting, prior to an appointment, or even in a queue whilst shopping. Realistically, you could have anticipated the potential that you would have had some time to spare.
 
Rather than letting the situation frustrate you, and damage your perspective for the rest of the day, why not try and prepare for inconveniences?
 
Pack a good book into your bag as a great way to make the most of any spare time that comes your way! Falling behind with replying to emails, or have forgotten to call your parents in a few days? Use this time to catch up on other obligations and put the extra time to positive use and be able to tick something off of your To-Do list!
 
Using a little foresight to prepare for circumstances outside of our control gives us ownership. If you know your commute is likely to be long, download a few great podcasts to make your journey enjoyable. I’d guarantee that you would have a better evening having enjoyed the trip home rather than arriving through the door complaining about the traffic.
 
 
Every second counts; use them wisely!
 
Take time for gratitude
 
In the course of a busy day, there are lots of things which happen which we can express gratitude for. Busy schedules and pressures of life can mean we don’t ever stop to acknowledge them.
 
If you have the unfortunate habit of complaining, taking time to stop and reflect on all those things you are taking for granted is a powerful tool.
 
Try keeping a gratitude journal, where each day you write down one thing that you are grateful for. It could be a message from a loved one. You might be grateful for a sunny day. Perhaps you enjoyed a nice lunch, or are grateful for the clothes you have to wear. Living in a safe and dry home is something most of us are fortunate to experience but forget is not a given for everybody.
 
Once you start to focus on those positive aspects of your day, it helps illuminate your level of thinking to rise above things that might normally cause you to complain.
 
There are many things to be grateful for; it is never a bad day to stop and smell the flowers!
 
Avoid mutual dissatisfaction as a social tool
 
In social interactions, we all try to find common ground. This is a perfect way to strike up a conversation, break the ice, and get to know a little more about somebody.
 
The difficulty is that one of the easiest ways to establish something in common is to find something we both dislike. How many conversations have you experienced that start with complaining about the weather, or about how bad the traffic was today? I’d be willing to bet it is rather a lot.
 
One great way to stop complaining is to position yourself in a place where the negatives are always considered the lowest priority.
 
If you are going somewhere to meet new people, try having a few icebreakers in your back pocket; and make sure none of them are complaints! Here are a few ideas:
  • I really enjoy meeting new people, how about you?
  • May I ask a little more about what brings you here today?
  • These events are always great fun, have you been here before?
  • I’m really looking forward to the weekend with my family; do you have anything planned?
 
Complain in a constructive way
 
Complaining for the sake of expressing yourself is sometimes cathartic. However, it can be more positive and constructive to find a solution for the problem at hand.
 
If you are feeling frustrated and really need to vent, thinking about what actions you can take to avoid such a complaint recurring is a useful way both to take control of the situation and to find a positive solution.
 
Here are some thought process adjustments you can make:
 
Complaint: I’m so annoyed I can’t believe I didn’t get there on time!
 
Constructive complaint: I am frustrated with myself to have been running late. Next time I will set myself an alarm to leave 15 minutes earlier to allow for the traffic, which I know is usually bad this time of day.
 
Complaint: I won’t be coming here again; the service is far too slow!
 
Constructive complaint: I was disappointed with the service and will let my server know. I will ask if there is a reason that service today is not at the usual standard and will listen to the answer I receive.
 
Complaint: This queue is ridiculously long; I’ve wasted so much time!
 
Constructive complaint: Next time I need to visit this store, I will come at a quieter time of day to avoid the long queues.
 
 
References:
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Lauren Edwards-Fowle
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 

 

 
About the Author: Lauren Edwards-Fowle


 
Lauren Edwards-Fowle is a professional copywriter based in South East England. Lauren worked within Children's Services for five years before moving into the business sector. She holds an MSc in Applied Accountancy and BSc in Corporate Law. She now volunteers within the community sport sector, helping young people to live healthier, more productive lifestyles and overcome the barriers to inclusion that they face. With a keen interest in physical wellbeing, nutrition and sports, Lauren enjoys participating in a variety of team sports in her spare time, as well as spending time with her young family and their dog Scout.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

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publicado por achama às 07:51
Segunda-feira, 30 / 12 / 19

3 Most Common Negative Feelings and How to Cope with Them

Lauren Edwards-Fowle.

learning-mind.com

Posted December 28, 2019.

 

 


We all experience negative feelings from time to time. How we manage them and having coping mechanisms in place is vital to ensure we can move forward and process our emotions in a healthy way.

Here are some of the most common negative feelings, what they mean, and how you can deal with them.

Anxiety/Nerves
Anxiety is common and can be a very normal emotion to experience. Preparing for a difficult conversation or practicing for an important job interview are situations that are bound to invoke nerves.


However, constant anxiety, particularly around everyday circumstances, can build up over time and create a pressure cooker of emotions which has a negative stressor effect on our health, both mental and physical.

What can you do to cope with anxiety?
If you are experiencing extreme or very regular anxiety, it is critical to recognise this and set aside some time to work through the causes. Often, anxiety is an indicator of an underlying problem, and talking through your feelings with somebody you trust is a great way of trying to work through the issues that could be causing it.

Ensure that you are practicing good self-care by sleeping well, keeping yourself active, and putting time into maintaining your close relationships even when you find it difficult to express yourself.

If you feel able to, try keeping a regular journal to identify when your anxiety is at its peak. This should help identify which parts of your life are causing your anxiety, and give you an idea about where the stress is being created that you need to work on mitigating or eliminating from your life.

Further help and support is available should you be experiencing intense feelings of anxiety. Please check our article about emotion-focused coping techniques for more guidance on dealing with anxiety.
Guilt

We can all feel guilty now and again; it is a negative emotion that can relate to any aspect of our lives. Parents often talk about guilt when trying to balance their priorities between parenting, career, social life and self-care.

Other triggers for feelings of guilt can involve being more fortunate than others or having to choose between social engagements or which friends to spend the most time with and feeling guilty at having had to make that choice.

You can also experience guilt as a result of having a guilty conscience; having done something you are not proud of, and then regretting your actions later.

How to cope with guilt

If you are struggling with feelings of guilt, the first step is to try and understand whether it is healthy or not. Should there be a clear and identifiable reason behind these negative feelings, and you know why you are experiencing guilt, this is likely a healthy emotion and a natural reaction to perhaps some behavior that you have come to regret.

In this circumstance there are several things you can do to alleviate your guilt:
  • Taking ownership of whatever action it may be that you regret
  • Apologizing to anybody who you feel you have wronged
  • Finding ways of making amends for any hurt you may have caused
  • Being prepared to listen to the person or people you have hurt, and giving them the time to find closure in explaining what you can do to move forward from this
  • How to manage unhealthy guilt

Unhealthy guilt is quite different and is where your emotions are not rational or identifiable. In this circumstance, you need to process the reasons behind your negative emotions and take steps to be able to clarify your mind to avoid dwelling on the situation unnecessarily.

This could involve speaking about your feeling with a group, or with a person you trust. You could try writing down exactly why you are experiencing guilt and try to identify things you can do to be proactive about controlling this emotion.

If your guilt is not within your control, you can look to work through those aspects which you can and identify where your behaviours can influence the situation.

Perhaps you have no reason to be experiencing guilt, in which case you need to ensure that you are not being manipulated into feeling guilty for events which you did not cause and move onwards and upwards.

Anger

Anger is probably one of the most common negative feelings. Everybody experiences anger to some extent when they feel wronged or treated unfairly.


How you manage anger, however, is crucial to maintaining healthy relationships and ensuring that your emotions are expressed clearly, whilst being under your control.

Ways to cope with anger
  • Take a deep breath. Often anger is a knee jerk reaction. Try counting to 10 slowly, closing your eyes, and practice deep breathing. Sometimes taking a moment out of the situation can be enough to calm down, and process how you wish to respond.
  • Give yourself some quiet time. If you are overwhelmed with a situation and feel as though you are close to lashing out, remove yourself to have some time to think and decide what course of action is best suited to the situation.
  • Identify the cause of your anger. Sometimes anger is rational, and expressing your feelings is essential to be able to ‘get it off your chest’. Other times, you may be misdirecting your anger, and need to ensure that you are not pointing the finger of blame in the wrong place.
  • Do something about it. Sometimes anger is frustration reaching the tipping point; if this is the scenario, try to take proactive and positive steps to dispel the circumstances which are leading you to experience negative emotions. Speak out, write a list, decide on actions – allow yourself to take active control of the situation.

If you are experiencing feelings of anger which you are struggling to control, do not hesitate to seek help. There are many anger management counsellors and groups who can help you work through the cause of your negative emotions and find healthy outlets to help you start feeling more positive.
 
 

 
Lauren Edwards-Fowle
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 

 

 
About the Author: Lauren Edwards-Fowle


 
Lauren Edwards-Fowle is a professional copywriter based in South East England. Lauren worked within Children's Services for five years before moving into the business sector. She holds an MSc in Applied Accountancy and BSc in Corporate Law. She now volunteers within the community sport sector, helping young people to live healthier, more productive lifestyles and overcome the barriers to inclusion that they face. With a keen interest in physical wellbeing, nutrition and sports, Lauren enjoys participating in a variety of team sports in her spare time, as well as spending time with her young family and their dog Scout.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:

 

 
 

A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com
 
 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

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publicado por achama às 06:45
Quinta-feira, 26 / 12 / 19

The Five Buddha Families and How They Can Help You Understand Yourself

By Valerie Soleil.

learning-mind.com.

Posted December 25th, 2019. 

 
 
 
The Five Buddha Families are a vital principle in Buddhist philosophy. Buddhism is primarily concerned with reaching a state of Enlightenment, wholly separated from the individualistic and earth-bound tendencies of the Ego. Through the purging of ego-based beliefs and emotions, we grow to inhabit a space of Connection and Oneness with the Source. As a result, we become intimately conscious of being at One with All Creation.
 
Granted, we aren’t all Buddhist monks seeking absolute Enlightenment. Yet, the techniques that have been developed for this purpose can still be helpful in our own spiritual journeys.
 
 
In the first place, they can help us to understand our emotional landscapes. Secondly, they can help transcend limiting beliefs that might be holding us back from a higher consciousness. One of these techniques is known as the Five Buddha Families.
What are the Five Buddha Families?
Five Families, Five Emotional Energies
 
The Five Buddha Families help us to understand and work with emotional energies. Each family is the expressions of a state of being, represented by a Dhyani, or Meditation, Buddha. A season, element, symbol, colour and position on a five-sided mandala is associated with every family. Similarly, every state of being has its pure, wise or balanced form. Also, its klesha, imbalanced or deluded form.
 
The Five Buddha Families and their associated meditations provide a means of recognising which aspects of our emotional energy are out of balance. Subsequently, we can meditate on or pray to the appropriate family to regain equilibrium. In addition, we can seek to purge or pacify the emotional delusion that is holding us from Enlightenment.
 
The Five Buddha Families present a comprehensive understanding of the natural human condition. For instance, showing the interplay and dialogue between Enlightened and Deluded states of being rather than deny or repress Deluded states, the Five Meditation Buddhas call upon us to acknowledge and recognise them. Thus transforming their emotional force into positive energies.
 
The Five Families approach is not static or written in stone. Generally speaking, it’s a method by which we can identify our prevailing state of being.
 
Likewise, it is the perspective from which we are currently engaging with the world. This might be different from one year to the next, from one day to the next, or even from one hour to the next! It’s simply a guide so we can understand where we are coming from, and how this can help or hinder us.
Without further ado, here are the Five Buddha Families:
The Buddha Family
 
Lord: Vairochana, One Who Completely Manifests
Symbol: wheel
Element: space
 
Position in mandala: Centre
 
Colour: white
Enlightened State: making space
Deluded State: ignorance or dullness
 
The Buddha aspect is the one that allows the other families to function. In effect, acting as the root of these emotional energies. When in balance, we can make space for ourselves and others to better manifest our truth. Nevertheless, if our Buddha aspects are off-kilter, we can sink into lethargy. In other words, a spiritually unproductive space where nothing is being manifested.
The Varja Family
 
Lord: Akshobhya, The Unshakeable One
Symbol: vajra
Season: winter
Element: water
 
Position: East
Colour: blue
Enlightened State: purifying our perception of reality
Deluded State: anger
 
The Vajra family is all about the precision and intellectual exactness that allows us to perceive life with clarity. Emotions can often taint our perception of reality. However, Akshobhya calls us to sit with our feelings to recognise their causes.
 
Finding clarity within the emotion is crucial for not giving in to all-consuming anger. Of course, this can cloud our judgement and hides reality from us. Just as still pools reflect our truth back to us, or steady streams lead us to the ocean, turbulent waters and rushing rivers make it harder to perceive reality.
The Ratna Family
 
Lord: Ratnasambhava, Source of Preciousness
Symbol: jewel
Season: autumn
Element: earth
 
Position: South
 
Colour: yellow
Enlightened State: equanimity
Deluded State: pride
 
The Ratna Family is associated with merit, wealth and generosity. We know what is good and has value. For this reason, we do our best to attract it or increase its presence in our lives. Albeit, without falling into the trap of hoarding or avarice.
 
In remaining balanced and equanimous in our attitude to wealth, riches and merit, we steer clear of growing prideful and mean. We understand that we reap what we sow. Moreover, like the earth, we work to multiply the riches and merit around us. All in the spirit of appreciation, generosity and love.
The Padma Family
 
Lord: Amitabha, Infinite Light
Symbol: Lotus flower
Season: spring
Element: fire
 
Position: West
Colour: red
Enlightened State: empowering discrimination, seeing clearly what is needed
Deluded State: desirous attachment
 
This family is often linked with creativity and the arts. This is because of the association with passion and spring. However, this wisdom lies in discriminating love and attachment. It knows what to attract or reject for the betterment of our spiritual journey. As such, much like a flaming torch, it lights the way towards what we need.
 
Fatuous and temporary fascination or seduction, on the other hand, is misguiding. Consequently, it can lead us astray for our path of spiritual growth.
The Karma Family
 
Lord: Amogasiddhi, One Who Accomplishes What is Meaningful
 
Symbol: double vajra
Season: summer
Element: air
 
Position: north
Colour: green
Enlightened State: accomplishing good
Deluded State: jealousy
 
The Karma family very much encapsulates ‘doing.’ This means accomplishing things with meaning and impact. For example, picture an invigorating breath of fresh air on a hot summer’s day. This Karma aspect is energising and purposeful. However, if we are consumed with jealousy for another, it’s difficult to achieve anything based on good intentions. More to the point, our selfless drive and ambition can be hampered.
Finding Your Buddha Family
 
Which family do you identify with most? Are you more in the balanced or imbalanced state of being? As previously mentioned, the answer to these questions might change from day-to-day, month-to-month, or year-to-year. Still, it is good to regularly reflect on your perspective through the lens of the Five Buddha Families. Only then can you work towards maintaining balanced states of mind in all aspects.
Final Thoughts
 
We all veer from love and passion to jealousy and possession. Or from thoughtful discrimination to harsh, destructive anger. Ultimately, the Five Meditation Buddhas are the perfect tools with which to bring our Soul back to the centre.
 
After all, we should be ready to use our emotions for the progress of our spiritual journeys. Not let them be barriers to our growth.
References:

  1. msu.edu.htm
  2. www.bbc.co.uk


Valerie Soleil


 



 
About the Author: Valerie Soleil


Valerie Soleil is a writer with over 5 years of experience and holds a bachelor degree in law and a B.A. in Psychology. She is a physical & mental health enthusiast who constantly expands her knowledge about the mysteries of the human body and mind. Some of the activities Valerie is particularly passionate about are traveling and reading because they help her broaden her horizons.
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 

Archives:
 



 
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 



 

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publicado por achama às 04:59
Domingo, 22 / 12 / 19

10 Signs of Unresolved Grief That Poisons Your Life

Sherrie Hurd.

learning-mind.com

Posted December 21st, 2019.

 


 

 

Have you ever felt like your heart was broken but did not know why? This could be due to unresolved grief.
 
When a loved one dies, we grieve, but then over time, we heal. It sounds simple, doesn’t it? Well, it’s not. Sometimes we have to deal with unresolved issues due to the grief we went through. It just doesn’t make sense now, does it? Everyone dies at some point, so why can’t we move on? I know I’m personally having a problem with this as well. It’s definitely something we want to soothe and heal properly.
 
But first, what is unresolved grief?
 
As time passes, the intensity of your grief should naturally lessen. You may be able to function more easily and return to your normal eating and sleeping patterns. Over more time, many people return to their normal daily routines even, but that doesn’t mean they don’t have unresolved grief hiding in the background.
 
Unfortunately, unresolved grief can show up unexpectedly in a very negative way. It has been known to affect current and future relationships in those who may not have completed the necessary passages of grief.
 
After a significant emotional loss such as death or end of a romantic relationship, people alter their life choices to protect their hearts from being hurt again. Have you ever done that?
 
I have, and I want you to know that it is okay. And I encourage working toward a resourceful solution, as it is the key to managing it effectively. It’s important to become familiar with some signs of unresolved grief in this post.
 
Warning signs that you are experiencing unresolved grief.
 
1. Appetite changes
 
When someone close to us passes away, we hardly notice our appetite changes. As time goes by, we may start to overeat, or not eat much at all.
 
I have seen people lose 20-30 lbs in just a month or two. This has happened to me as well. It’s difficult to explain exactly why we do this, but I can surmise that we are trying to use food as a balm for our pain, or maybe sometimes just a distraction. During the stages of grief, we might see this as part of denial.
 
2. Difficulty concentrating
 
Loved ones that were especially close to us will leave a hole where they used to be. Now, this hole, over time, will slowly fill with loving memories and warm feelings. At least, this is what’s supposed to happen.
 
Honestly, this can take years to happen if someone was a mother, child or mate. We will notice that it has become difficult to concentrate on anything without thinking of our loved one. We may start to fail classes, forget appointments, and even have trouble at work. It can take over every corner of our minds.
 
3. Sleep problems
 
When we lose loved ones, we may experience sleep problems. It could be that we sleep too much or we suffer from insomnia. It’s similar to our eating disorders when going through unresolved grief. We may also experience nightmares, or dreams where we are with our loved ones, just to awake and they are not there. Our realization when waking can hurt horribly once again.
 
4. Nauseating sadness
 
If we haven’t’ been able to get over the loss of a loved one, there could be stages of nauseating sadness. This sadness generally comes from anxiety. If the deceased was someone who was always there for you, and someone you could talk to, your anxiety levels will peak at times causing nausea, a sick stomach paired with sadness. It’s the worst feeling.
 
5. Inability to talk
 
Some people just cannot talk about the death of their friend or loved one. It’s too painful for them, or they are still in the stages of denial. Did you know that denial can last long past the time you thought you were okay? Many people will keep to themselves and refuse to even mention their loved one’s name. This is incredibly sad.
 
6. Not thinking
 
Like some people who stop talking about their loved ones, others will push their loved ones completely out of their minds. It seems easier for them to pretend that the deceased never existed. It’s not because they are being cruel, but simply trying to keep from completely breaking down.
 
Look, death can be horrendous for some people, while others can handle it well. For those who don’t wish to think of their loved ones, the deceased must have meant a lot to them.
 
7. Avoiding things
 
When someone you love dies, you attempt to heal. Some people do well with this and go back to their routine in life. Others will avoid doing anything because they feel stuck in the moment of death. This means avoiding places, people, things, and even losing jobs over their inability to return to work. Avoidance is another form of denial.
 
8. Not accepting any negative
 
Then you have some people who only want to talk about all the positive things in life, including all the good accomplishments of their deceased loved one. But there is never a moment for tears, or never a time to get angry for them. It’s as if they refuse to let any negative emotions emerge.
 
I’m going to tell you this, not accepting the negative with the positive can cause severe damage to your health. Eventually, you will hit the bottom, and all that positive thinking will crash. Grieving will be worse, than if you’d grieved earlier.
 
9. Fall back into routine
 
Yes, you should eventually return to routine. But here’s the other side of the coin: You should also allow yourself a bit of downtime to feel the pain. Yes, I said it. You have to feel the pain in order to heal from the pain. So, returning immediately to your ordinary life wouldn’t be the best thing to do. If you’re doing this, it’s definitely unresolved issues with grief.
 
10. Stop getting close to people
 
Unresolved grief can also make you turn cold toward others. The one you lost was so close to you that you refuse to hurt like that again. So, what do you do? You close yourself off from everybody else. There is healing to be done with the death of your loved one, and you’ve obviously not completed this cycle.
 
Yes, you can get through this in a healthy way.
 
Is your life forever changed after grief or a loss? Yes, it can be. Managing your grief is a good thing, but you don’t have to live the rest of your life in pain due to unresolved grief.
 
Imagine thinking about someone who died, or an ex, without feeling broken-hearted. Imagine living and loving to the fullest. What would that be like for you?
 
It can be done! I have done it and so can you! Seek out ways to manage your unresolved grief and watch the way you move forward to improve your joy, fulfillment, and life.
 
References:
 
 

Sherrie Hurd

 

 

Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us. 

 

 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:
 

 
 

A Trusty with Privacy Search 
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 18:39
Domingo, 22 / 12 / 19

The Four Noble Truths in Buddhism and What They Can Teach You

By Valerie Soleil.

learning-mind.com.

Posted December 20th, 2019. 

 



The Four Noble Truths can be traced back to the teaching of Buddha, in fact, it is the main principle of Buddhism. Buddha was the first one to realize these truths and from there he spread the word to his followers. To understand Buddhism is to understand these truths.

Studying the Four Noble truths brings a level of knowledge that not many people can grasp. It takes patience and hard work to truly know these guidelines. It is essential we do not simply read these truths; we need to understand and live them in our everyday lives.

The Four Noble Truths


First Noble Truth


The First Noble Truth is dukkha orsuffering. However, it is not exactly easy to sum up. Dukkha can mean different things to different people. There isn’t an exact translation in the English language, which makes it difficult to pinpoint.

Many people have different ideas on what dukkha means. Most can agree that it incorporates feelings of stress, pain, loss, anxiety, dissatisfaction, and unhappiness. Since the term is so broad, it is important to fully understand this first noble truth in order to address it in your own personal life.

Essentially, dukkha is those lingering feelings of unhappiness, whether it be from stress, grief or other. Every single in the person in the world is affected by this sensation at one time or another.

Dukkha is a part of life and unfortunately, there is no way around it. The four noble truths aren’t about eliminating dukkha all together, but rather learning to manage it so you minimize your suffering.

When the Buddha introduced this truth, he did not want his followers to simply read it and move on, he wanted them to really sit and contemplate the existence of dukkha.


  • Why does it exist?
  • What purpose does it serve?
  • Is there meaning to it?

Most people don’t like to question this because they think that contemplating suffering will make them unhappy. But this is quite the opposite actually. The suffering will usually pass; however, it can be an opportunity to truly know yourself in times of grief which ultimately will give you a better understanding of the self.

There are many ways to experience dukkha. The obvious ways are through grief, anger, sadness or pain. It’s not until we really start to examine ourselves that we realize dukkha comes in many subtle forms; illness, envy, ageing, and small heartbreaks.

Many suffer from a sense of longing, perhaps for a better lover, body, or more money. This has just as much effect on us over time. It’s just not as obvious to our minds since our lives are filled with constant distractions. All of which are usually tied in with the source of suffering in the first place.

Second Noble Truth
The Second Noble Truth is the truth of the cause of dukkha or suffering. Suffering doesn’t just appear out of thin air, there are causes and conditions for every action. It is important to have a good understanding of the Buddhist principle of Karma in order to go further. If you are not familiar with the belief, please study these laws before reading any further.

The Buddha teaches that there are Three Poisons of the mind that we need to bring attention too. This will help you fully understand the Second Noble Truth.

The Three Poisons are:

  • Confusion
  • Cravings
  • Aversions

Any source of dukkha is manifested through one of these. We either live in the past by trying to hold on to a pleasant experience. Or we live in the future by idealizing a situation that hasn’t happened yet. Or we become deluded and detached from our current reality over an unpleasant situation.

We all crave something; it is human nature. We want to fit in, we want to be successful, we want a great love. While this is almost impossible to avoid, it is important to examine these thoughts as they pass by so that we don’t attach feelings of happiness to them.

When we desire something, we build up a fantasy situation in our head and when that situation doesn’t happen, we feel a strong sense of unhappiness and loss for something that never existed in the first place. This can cause so much suffering when left unchecked and most of the time people don’t even realize they are doing this.

Another cause of dukkha is the inability to comprehend these thought patterns. We know we feel sadness and stress but are not able to explain where it came from. Perhaps you are simply trying to have a positive outlook on life so you dream of better things to come. But in reality, that can sometimes hinder your mental health when your realities don’t line up with the thoughts in your head.

Third Noble Truth
Now before we start feeling down about our inevitable thought patterns, there is hope! The third Noble Truth teaches us the solution to dukkha or at least gives us hope for a cure. This Truth teaches us the cessation of suffering or dukkha.

Essentially, the solution to dukkha is to stop clinging to ideas and false realities. Sounds simple enough, right? Well, not exactly. One cannot simply will themselves to stop longing, it is impossible and will not work. You need to be able to fully let these feelings pass while being aware that they are happening and examine the source of them.

It’s important to understand that these cravings do not satisfy us, but rather they just lead to disappointment. If you can fully understand this, the sense of longing should be able to pass any importance.

The Third Noble Truth is an easy one to miss, indulging in fantasies (good or bad) comes as second nature to most and the point isn’t to eliminate these thoughts. These thoughts can be beneficial and are important for living a good life. If no one cared or looked to the future, it would be very hard to find the motivation to work toward life goals.

The point of the Third Truth is to recognize where these cravings come from. To really understand where the thoughts come from and not place feelings of happiness or unhappiness on those thoughts. They should be able to flow through your mind like water. This is the key to reaching enlightenment, becoming the master of your own mind. Situations are inevitable, it’s how you react to them that matters.
Fourth Noble Truth
The last and final Noble Truth is breaking the cycle of dukkha. If you can do this, you can truly reach Nirvana. Of course, this is much easier said than done. It takes entire lifetimes to fully understand and live these truths. It is a matter of living each moment in a state of mindfulness. You must commit to this path and walk it for your entire life, it must come as second nature.

The Fourth Noble Truth is the understanding that our thoughts shape our reality. You must be able to clear your mind, de-attach any feelings to thoughts, and walk the path of enlightenment. It will be very difficult at first and might not be achievable in this lifetime.


Essentially, you are re-training your mind and entire thought process. Not an easy thing to do. But eventually, it will become easier by developing a strong mind, solid virtues and gaining new wisdom as often as possible.
Final Thoughts

These ancient teachings are still very relevant today. We all have the power within us to walk this path and achieve enlightenment with a lot of hard work and discipline.

References:
www.bbc.co.uk
www.pbs.org




Valerie Soleil


 



 
About the Author: Valerie Soleil


Valerie Soleil is a writer with over 5 years of experience and holds a bachelor degree in law and a B.A. in Psychology. She is a physical & mental health enthusiast who constantly expands her knowledge about the mysteries of the human body and mind. Some of the activities Valerie is particularly passionate about are traveling and reading because they help her broaden her horizons.
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 

Archives:
 



 
A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com


 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 



 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 18:10
Quinta-feira, 19 / 12 / 19

What Is Empathy, What Are the Types and Why Do We Need It?

By Valerie Soleil.

learning-mind.com.

Posted December 18th, 2019. 

 




 
“I think we all have empathy. We may not have enough courage to display it.” – Maya Angelou
 
 
The term empathy was first introduced to the English language by American psychologist E.B. Titchener. He coined the term after translating the German counterpart “Einfühlung”. However, he was referring to the phenomena of motor mimicry. This is where someone is directing mimicking another’s actions.
 
What Is Empathy?
 
The term we know and use today is very different. Empathy can be tricky to define since it covers a broad area. While it is hard to define, many can agree on one common opinion; it is an automatic mental response to someone else’s actions, thought process, or emotions.
 
Simply put, empathy is the ability to fully comprehend or experience other people’s thoughts, feelings and behaviors. Ever heard the phrase “walk a mile in someone’s shoes”? This is referring to empathy.
 
What Is the Difference Between Sympathy and Empathy?
 
These terms are different in reality, however, they are often used interchangeably in speech.
 
Although they seem very similar, there is a very clear distinction between empathy and sympathy. Sympathy is when you share the feelings of another person which can relate to feelings and emotions.
 
“A distinction is maintained between self and other. Sympathy involves the experience of being moved by, or responding in tune with, another person.” – Hodges and Myers
 
Empathy is when you fully understand the feelings of another but do not always share or feel them. However, sometimes empathy can lead to shared feelings and emotions.
 
“Empathy is often defined as understanding another person’s experience by imagining oneself in that other person’s situation: One understands the other person’s experience as if it were being experienced by the self, but without the self actually experiencing it.” – Hodges and Myers
 
What Is the Difference Between Empathy and Empaths?
 
Empathy is the ability to read and appreciate another person. It can be a tough situation they are going through or simply understanding their points of view in a conversation. At times you can feel their emotions, but this isn’t always the case.
 
Empaths are susceptibly emotional people. They experience high levels of understanding when it comes to reading another person’s emotional state of being. As a consequence, this usually translates into directly sharing the emotions of someone else.
 
Their intense empathy creates a shared emotional understanding. Where an empath strongly feels the emotions of people around them, this can be a one on one experience or in a large crowd. Many people who are empaths are unaware. They simply accept that they are sensitive to the energy around them. Or that they feel more emotions than the average person.
 
Empaths can tune into another living being’s experience intuitively, whether they know they are doing so or not. Some empaths can even experience the energy of all living things like plants and animals.
 
It sounds cool being an empath. However, people who do not understand it are left feeling drained, or over-energized. All without even realizing what happened. However, if you learn to accept your over-emotional empathic energy, you can manage or even harness it.

  • What Are the Types of Empathy?
  • Cognitive Empathy
  • Emotional Empathy
  • Compassionate Empathy

 
There are three different types of empathy. Some people are better at understanding one type. However, you can develop all three. If you can you are on your way to becoming an emotionally intelligent human being.
 
A person high in perspective-taking may be good at understanding others’ points of view. Yet they might be prone to emotional cues. Or, an emotionally developed person could be good at experiencing emotional states.
 
Usually, we can all appreciate each type on some level. The key is to keep an open mind when communicating. Then you can deeply relate to another person.
 
Cognitive Empathy
 
Cognitive empathy is the ability to understand someone’s thought process. It makes us better communicators. This is because it helps us recognize the best way to communicate. In addition, we can relate to someone in their own words, so to speak.
 
This refers to the ability to comprehend what a person might be thinking on a level others cannot. You can develop this level of empathy by simply asking the question “What is the other person going through? How are they thinking in this situation”?
 
This type can be a huge advantage. Especially when you find yourself needing to “get inside another person’s head”. This trait is perfect for leadership roles, undergoing negotiations, or trying to manage a large group. However, those who react purely with this type can seem cold or unattached since it does not invoke feelings or emotions.
 
Emotional Empathy
 
This is affective empathy. It is the ability to share the feelings of someone else. This type helps you build emotional relationships with others. This refers to the ability to recognize the feelings of another person through an emotional connection. It answers the question: “How does the other person feel?”
 
Have you ever been watching a sad movie and found yourself crying? This is the most basic example of emotional empathy. Most of us have this emotional capacity on some level. However, it can be challenging to speak to a person you might not like very much and still be able to feel emotional empathy for them.
 
Emotional empathy is wonderful but like anything, it can have its downside. One downside of this type occurs when people lack the ability to manage their own emotions as well as the overwhelming amount of emotions they feel when communicating with other people. It can lead to a feeling of burn out and exhaustion.
 
Compassionate Empathy
 
This is empathic concern. This usually is the most intense version of empathy. Actually, it goes far beyond simply feeling or understanding the emotions of others. This is usually what drives people to volunteer, take action or help all living beings in any way possible.
 
Have you have ever experienced the real agony of seeing an animal on the street, or a child being abused and felt this strong urge to do something? This is compassionate empathy. The main question asked is: “What can I do to help?”
 
This particular kind uses your emotional intelligence to help a situation. It invokes not only an emotional response but also intellectual problem-solving.
 
This type is so vital, especially in today’s society. This is because it involvesaction. Typically invoking the first two types of empathy as well. If you can truly understand and share the feelings of another being, you can help them on a deeper level.
 
Why Do We Experience Empathy?
 
Now let’s get down to the nitty-gritty of why we have the capability of empathy in the first place. We have something called “mirror neurons”. These fire when animals or humans observe and experience emotion in others. This was a huge breakthrough in the field of neuroscience. In fact, it gave us a great understanding of why we feel empathy.
 
Empathy is an adaptation that we essentially needed to evolve. Evolution teaches us that specialized neurobiological mechanisms in the prefrontal cortex have evolved in humans. They not only perceive but also predict and respond accordingly. This is why different types exist. But also why we need to be able to comprehend and utilize all three of them.
 
Why Do We Need It?
 
“When you show deep empathy toward others, their defence energy goes down and positive energy replaces it. That’s when you can get more creative in solving problems.”- Stephen Covey
 
Try this experiment the next time you are stuck in traffic or waiting in line for something. Take a serious look at the people around you and imagine who they might be, what kind of lives do they live? What they might be thinking at this very moment? Are they frustrated? Happy? Bored? Try to really consider the state of this person. This will help put yourself in their shoes and will help to develop empathy.
 
Empathy is very important when it comes to building genuine relationships with others. Start with your family or significant other. Because if you can’t connect with the most important people in your life, then who can you connect with?
 
Empathy from a global perspective is so crucial. In society, we are often taught to look out for number one, pursue our own goals, whatever the cost might be. And yes, self-care and goals are important. However, we need to stop looking at ourselves as separate from others. We should start looking at ourselves as one. Because after all, we are all the same at the end of the day. Each person experiences the same struggles, joys, pain, and love that we do.
 
Empathy is what pushes people to help when there are major disasters. Ordinary people are willing to help strangers. Not only because they feel a profound level of compassion towards them. But also because they know if the roles were reversed, others would help them. Without it, the world would be a much darker place to live.
 
 
Empathy is so significant for human connection. Likewise, human connections are what contribute to a happy, healthy life. It really does make the world go ‘round.
 
How to Be More Empathetic in Relationships
 
The key factors to empathic interactions are listening and understanding.
 
Most of us have this terrible habit of talking at people instead of actually talking to them. We say our piece and for us, the conversation is over. Then, while the other person is speaking, we are already thinking about what we want to say next instead of listening to what is coming out of their mouths.
 
Actively listening means that you are trying not to judge the other person. You are actually listening without interrupting or formulating a response.
 
Healthy relationships require patience, nurturing and thoughtfulness. A relationship that lacks empathy typically won’t last. This is because both sides aren’t receiving what they truly need. When people only think of their own interests, they have nothing else to offer another person.
 
By striving to understand someone’s needs you can build a strong foundation for a lasting relationship. This is so important when building a romantic relationship with a partner.
 
 
The workplace may be one of the most difficult places for empathetic relationships to develop. Mainly as many people tend to separate their personal feelings from the workplace. However, a successful work environment usually requires teamwork. So, it’s important to utilize empathy in the workplace. Without it, it’s much easier to fall into disagreements. In the long run, this can make a workplace a very hostile place to be.
 
This can also be applied to managing others. Bosses who lack empathy are likely to have miserable employees. In addition, their work will suffer because of it. It has been proven that people work better from praise and acknowledgements then they do from fear and punishment.
 
By actively practising empathy in the workplace, we can inspire others to work harder. Only then can they can contribute their unique needs and talents.
 
Teaching empathy is so important in early childhood. Especially when responding to a child’s needs and emotions. Children continue to develop empathy when they see their parents or caregivers practising it. This is because children mimic not only actions but also feelings and emotions from the people around them.
 
This is a very common trait that sociopaths lack. They never learned to develop empathy or solid relationships at a young age. As a result, they lack the ability to develop it later in life.
 
Final Thoughts
 
Self-awareness and a non-judgmental attitude are needed before you can properly empathize with someone else. Look within yourself and find the strength to understand we are all connected. It doesn’t matter what is on the outside. At the core, every person is experiencing life in a similar way.
 
Empathy can not only strengthen your relationships but it will genuinely make you a better human being. One who leads a happy productive life.
 
References:

Valerie Soleil


 



 
About the Author: Valerie Soleil


Valerie Soleil is a writer with over 5 years of experience and holds a bachelor degree in law and a B.A. in Psychology. She is a physical & mental health enthusiast who constantly expands her knowledge about the mysteries of the human body and mind. Some of the activities Valerie is particularly passionate about are traveling and reading because they help her broaden her horizons.
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 



 

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publicado por achama às 05:38
Terça-feira, 17 / 12 / 19

6 Unexpected Ways to Relieve Stress, According to Science

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

December 16th, 2019.

 


 


Stress seems to be just a part of life these days. Whether it’s at work or at home, or on the commute between the two, stress can be unavoidable. A little stress is natural, but when it weighs on us heavily, it can be dangerous for our health. High stress increases our susceptibility to all sorts of dangerous health conditions. Knowing the best ways to relieve stress can be lifesaving.

Sometimes, when the usual techniques aren’t enough, you have to try some more unexpected ways to relieve that stress.

Unexpected Ways to Relieve Stress

Put on A Fake Smile


It seems there is some science behind the idea that you can “fake it ‘til you make it”. Smiling is a way to relieve stress and it works by convincing your body that you aren’t stressed at all. When you smile, you create the face shapes we naturally make when we’re happy. When you’re faking it, you trick your brain into reducing your stress levels. While it’s not recommended to hide your feelings, sometimes, you just have to get through it.

This study has proven that when we smile through stressful situations the intensity of our stress response will reduce. It is especially beneficial for our cardiovascular systems, including the heart. In this particular study, they also tested different kinds of smiles. They showed that full-face smiles, known as a Duchenne smile, are an even more beneficial way to relieve stress.

Some scientists also explain that our brains are wired for socializing. Mirror neurons in our brains make us want to recreate what other people do. This means what if we see another smile, we want to do it too. We can use our smile as a way of relieving the stress of others. By flashing someone a bright smile and letting them do it back, you might be helping them through a tough time.
Look at Fractals

Our brains love soothing patterns, but did you know they were a great, and rather unexpected, way to relieve stress? A fractal is a pattern that repeats identically or at least similarly. These could be created in paintings or drawings, like a mandala. Fractals can also be seen in nature, in places such as leaves, snowflakes, and seashells.

A number of studies have been done by tracking eye movements and using fMRI scans to show our biological response to fractals. They’ve proven that simply looking at fractals is a good way to relieve stress and can even reduce it by up to 60%.

There’s still some confusion about why this relieves stress, but some scientists suggest it should be due to the subconscious concentration that they require, or the repetition involved. Repetition is a great way to relieve stress naturally.


Use Your Thumbs
Unexpected is definitely the operative word. You can actually use your thumbs to relieve your stress. Doctors believe that if you put your thumb in your mouth and seal it, then blow, you can calm yourself down.

The theory goes that this will activate your Vagus Nerve, which is connected to your nervous system, responsible for the stress response. By blowing out in this way, you can reduce your heart rate and blood pressure, which are both heavily affected by stress. This way to relieve stress can even help to treat mild mood disorders.

If you aren’t in a position to put your whole thumb in your mouth, there is also a way to relieve stress by simply blowing on it. Your thumb has its own pulse, so by cooling it down, you can slow your heart rate and feel calmer.

Even eastern medicine has a way to relieve stress using your thumb. Apply pressure, using your thumb, on the side of your middle finger. Do this right at the base of your finger, where it meets your knuckle. This method is said to activate a nerve which loosens the muscles around the heart, helping you to relax.

Chew Gum

There have been countless studies done that show that chewing gum is a great way to relieve stress. The researched showed reduced stress, fatigue, anxiety, and depression in the participants. These studies involved collecting data and samples from volunteers, including saliva, before and after they took on stressful tasks, with and without chewing gum. The results showed measurable differences in their stress levels.

Ancient societies are also known to have chewed as a way to relieve stress. The Mayans and the Greeks would chew tree sap.
Do Some Chores

Deep down, we all know that procrastinating only creates more stress, but it doesn’t stop us from doing it. Research has now shown that putting off tasks is bad for our health! Cleaning, in particular, can be a great way to relieve stress. This study recommends washing dishes. Despite finding it hard to motivate ourselves to do it, once we start cleaning, our stress levels do decrease rapidly.

Scientists believe this could be down to the repetitive nature of the movements that cleaning requires. When we repeat an easy action over and over again, we start to do it on autopilot, allowing our minds to switch off and rest.

Sometimes, the world can seem a little out of control. Scientists have suggested that cleaning and organizing our own spaces can help us to feel some element of control. Finding a sense of control is a good way to relieve stress.

Be Near Plants


We all know that being in nature is a great way to relieve stress, but studies show that simply being in the presence of a plant is good enough. A study carried out at Washington State University proved that having plants around makes workers more productive and feel more focused on their work. They even recorded participants’ blood pressure lowering in the presence of plants.

Studies have shown that employees’ attendance rates rose when plants were introduced to the workplace and they often report feeling that the space was larger.

A study has also been carried out into the effects of plants on hospital patients’ healing. The presence of plants in a medical environment improves patients’ well-being and does help to speed up recovery. Even seeing photos of plants relieve stress.

Scientists have theorized that plants are a way to relieve stress because of their association with fractals and their ability to improve air quality.

As you have seen from the above, stress can be relieved in many ways, no matter how incredible they may sound at first. Do you have your own tricks that help you cope with daily stress and release tension? Share them with us in the comments below!

References:
  1. https://www.forbes.com
  2. https://www.scientificamerican.com

Becky Storey
 

 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

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publicado por achama às 05:25
Segunda-feira, 16 / 12 / 19

5 Signs of Compassion Fatigue and How to Deal with It as an Empath

Lauren Edwards-Fowle.

learning-mind.com

Posted December 15, 2019.

 

 

An empath by their very nature is extremely sensitive and should always be conscious of the signs of compassion fatigue. Empaths tend to be so acutely aware of the feelings of other people, that at times they can acquire those very emotions themselves.

There are many beautiful aspects to being an empath, and having the gift of being able to relate to and understand the feelings and natures of people. However, it can be emotionally and spiritually draining to be constantly bombarded with these heightened experiences.

What is compassion fatigue?
Compassion fatigue is a phenomenon that specifically impacts empaths. These are individuals with a highly caring nature, who often provide nurture within their line of work. Empaths often work as nurses, veterinarians or in philanthropic endeavours.

This condition is serious, and anybody with a strong empathetic nature should be on the look-out for signs of compassion fatigue. The reason that compassion fatigue arises is due to a sense of being overwhelmed by the influx of emotion, and the burden of carrying the distress of other people.

How do you know if you are experiencing compassion fatigue?
One of the key signs of compassion fatigue is that an empath will become desensitized to emotion. They may lose their ability to connect with people and find their emotions replaced with negative conditions including indifference, apathy and even anger. This is a downward spiral, and it is important to understand the signs of compassion fatigue to avoid falling victim to it.

The top 5 signs of compassion fatigue:

1. Feeling numb or indifferent


This is an unusual experience for an empath. When faced with a difficult situation, they automatically feel an engagement with a person or set of circumstances.

Feeling numb or not caring is an early sign of compassion fatigue. When sensory input becomes overwhelming, your response is to protect yourself by blocking acknowledgment of those sensors. If ignored, these feelings can descend from numbness to resentment and even anger.

2. Intentionally becoming isolated
When an empath is completely overloaded, they may decide to retreat and protect themselves from further sensory inputs. This can help to relax and restore your vitality, but isolating yourself can be a dangerous coping mechanism.

Isolation can become an easy solution, which may have a negative impact on other areas of your life. So if you spot this sign of compassion fatigue, try to find a way to be open and share your feelings with those closest to you. Seek help, rather than shutting yourself away from the world.

3. Unusual extreme emotional sensitivity to media
Having experienced emotional exhaustion, it is likely that if you have these signs of compassion fatigue, your emotions and nerves will become frayed, fragile, temperamental and prone to extreme reactions at the slightest provocation.


A quick to spot the signs of compassion fatigue is having a severe reaction that is completely out of character caused by a minor influence, such as a slightly sad book, movie or TV show.

4. Feeling physically and emotionally exhausted
It stands to reason that if your senses simply cannot cope with more emotional burdens, this will quickly begin to impact all areas of your health. Feeling extreme tiredness and exhaustion with no identifiable reason is an indication of compassion fatigue.

If you feel tired and disengaged with no reasonable reason, you may continue to feel this way until you unburden yourself of the load you carry.

5. Acting out of character and struggling to maintain close relationships
Any empath experiencing the signs of compassion fatigue will struggle to behave and act as they normally would. Their emotions and feelings are very fragile and cannot manage any additional senses to deal with.

This can lead to a lack of communication with loved ones, an urgent need to be left alone and create an isolated space. This can ultimately cause hurt and distance between you and those you love.
What to do if you are struggling with compassion fatigue

The first step to recovering is to acknowledge that you are struggling. Being able to identify unusual behaviours that are out of character can be the initial path to recognising the triggers for such changes.

Making a connection with your empathetic nature and appreciating and understanding both the qualities this affords you, and the pressure it puts you under, is crucial. Once you understand and reflect on yourself as an empath, it becomes much easier to identify why outside factors are having a damaging impact on your health and well-being.

If you are experiencing the signs of compassion fatigue, you need to take stock. It might be that you are not showing yourself enough self-care. You could be leaving yourself exposed to exterior emotional stressors that are too much for you to cope with.

One of the hardest things for an empath to do is to take a step back, and be able to prioritise their own well-being. However, if you see signs of compassion fatigue, you must look after yourself first, before you considering dedicating your time or emotional resources to help others.

Having recognised signs of compassion fatigue, the absolute worst thing you can do is to ignore it. This condition will not go away by itself. By failing to balance your emotions, you are not allowing yourself the capacity to stabilise.

It may be that counselling or other support will help. As an empath, it can be hard to explain to others who don’t have an understanding of how deeply you are affected by your surroundings.

Decompress and talk through your emotions first. Then implement practical emotional tools to manage your health. These are essential to moving forward in an enlightened way, without losing the part of yourself which makes you unique.
 

 
Lauren Edwards-Fowle
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 

 

 
About the Author: Lauren Edwards-Fowle


 
Lauren Edwards-Fowle is a professional copywriter based in South East England. Lauren worked within Children's Services for five years before moving into the business sector. She holds an MSc in Applied Accountancy and BSc in Corporate Law. She now volunteers within the community sport sector, helping young people to live healthier, more productive lifestyles and overcome the barriers to inclusion that they face. With a keen interest in physical wellbeing, nutrition and sports, Lauren enjoys participating in a variety of team sports in her spare time, as well as spending time with her young family and their dog Scout.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

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publicado por achama às 02:46
Segunda-feira, 02 / 12 / 19

Why Social Media Is Toxic and Bad for Your Mental Health

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

November 30th, 2019.

 
.why social media is toxic
 
 

 
Do you suffer from Facebook Envy or Sadfishing? Have you ever heard of Internet Banging? The internet is an amazing tool for the majority of us. As a result, more and more teenagers are spending longer online and without parental supervision. But some experts are now saying that social media is toxic. Here are just a few examples of how social media can be bad for your mental health.
 
4 Examples of Why Social Media Is Toxic
 
Sadfishing
 
If you haven’t heard of sadfishing it is the latest toxic trend to hit social media sites. Sadfishing is where someone (typically a young person) posts about a personal problem, usually in an ambiguous way, to garner sympathy and attention.
 
 
Examples might include:
  • I can’t go on like this for much longer.
  • I hate my life so much.
  • Feel like ending it all.
  • No one understands me.
  • What’s the point in carrying on?
 
Famous celebrity examples include Kendall Jenner and Justin Bieber. These two celebrities poured their hearts out on social media. Afterwards they received hundreds of thousands of likes on Instagram. More to the point, their personal stories of heartbreak garnered huge publicity for the pair.
 
However, there is a downside to sharing raw and emotional material online. For example, a young person posts a very personal and extremely distressing part of their lives but doesn’t get the support they imagined. Instead, they are ridiculed or bullied. Or even worse, encouraged to do something suicidal.
 
But there’s an even more worrying aspect to this toxic trend in social media. That is of grooming offenders using these comments to infiltrate the minds of vulnerable young people.
 
Consequently, the groomer will sympathise with the young person, possibly sharing stories themselves to engage further. This is all done to trap and ensnare the vulnerable person.
 
What To Do
 
Talk to a real person. A friend, family member, a teacher or someone you trust. Keep very personal issues off social media.
Facebook Envy
 
Another example of a toxic trend in social media is Facebook envy. Do you look at your friend’s posts on Facebook and secretly feel jealous of their life?
 
The problem is that the face we present to social media is the best face possible. We photoshop our selfies to look like supermodels and celebrities.
 
Furthermore, we glamourise our lives so that we only show the most interesting parts. We highlight our best achievements. Romances are always perfect with our partners doing everything for us. No wonder our friends worry that their own lives don’t match up.
 
But in the real world, this constant comparing of each other’s lives can cause actual depression, low self-esteem and feelings of worthlessness.
 
What to do
 
Don’t compare your life to your friends or your family. Remember, no one knows exactly what is going on behind the perfectly presented front of social media. In actual fact, the reality is likely to be much different.
 
Internet Banging
 
Studies suggest that gangs have moved from the streets to the internet. The clashes and taunts between rival gangs in the USA and now the UK has spilt over onto Twitter. Now, threats of online violence often end up in murder.
 
In fact, it is the relatively cheap cost of smartphones and the raised knowledge of street gangs in using the technology that has led to an upsurge in crime in some areas.
 
Likewise, thanks to social media, gang members have instant access to information. This includes names and addresses of potential victims. Members use platforms like Twitter to taunt their rivals.
 
“They’ll go on the streets of the group and they’ll take pictures or they’ll take a video and they’ll put it on YouTube or ‘We’re in your neighbourhood.’ And Facebook and they’ll take pictures right in the neighbourhood like saying, ‘Ha ha,’ laughing, taunting them. And that’s part of a taunt too. Like provoking them, letting them know, you know what we got your guy. He was snoozing.” Mario (violence worker)
 
As a result, the US is now experiencing a huge rise in gang-related crime.
 
What to do
 
Authorities are already trying to use social media to de-escalate violence before it starts. In order to interrupt the dialogue between gangs, they are encouraging relationships within them.
 
Glorifying Overworking
 
Do you know someone that is always busy? They have the hardest lives, they are continually on the go, and they never have a moment’s peace? In other words, they wear their hard work like a martyr’s badge of honour.
 
In today’s society, if you work yourself to the bone, it is seen as a prized character trait. Working longer hours, working harder, giving up time to work, these are all signs of dedication, of, well let’s face it, hard work.
 
To put it another way, there is a correlation between hours worked and the contribution to the household. We glorify those that come home exhausted and grumpy. We tiptoe around them and shush the children because so-and-so has been working all day. People that take time off, that only work part-time, they are lazy, irresponsible, and no good for the family or society.
 
The problem is that by glorifying overworking we are normalising working long hours. In reality, a balance between working and family time is far better for everyone’s mental health.
 
What to do
 
Don’t place so much importance on telling everyone how busy you are. It is not something to be proud of. Actually, it shows that you are bad at time-management and delegation.
 
Final Thoughts
 
Many people use the internet to keep in touch with friends and family and for the majority, it is a good place. However, for others – social media is toxic and damaging to their mental health. If we know why it can be toxic we can hopefully protect ourselves and our mental wellbeing.
 
References:
 
 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 02:19
Sábado, 30 / 11 / 19

Why Being Vulnerable Is Not a Bad Thing and Can Actually Benefit You

Sherrie Hurd.

learning-mind.com

Posted November 29, 2019.

being vulnerable benefits.


 
 
If being vulnerable was popular, then many good things would happen. Why? Because everyone would have to be honest.
 
Woah! Now that was a doozie of a sentence, wasn’t it? I like this part, “everyone would have to be honest.” Can you imagine everyone being honest, and how many good and bad consequences would come from that one action?
 
Well, to be honest, being honest, at the end of the day, spells great achievements in life. Guess what, being vulnerable can help you become that honest person.
 
Being vulnerable is not easy
 
Okay, now let’s look at the roadblock you got up. Being in a vulnerable state is not easy. It means tearing down that wall, letting down that guard, and opening up wide to the world….well, at least to loved ones and friends. It’s hard to be vulnerable to some people because it feels weak and makes you feel out of control.
 
Society has taught us so many negative things like lying fixes problems, stealing gets you what you want, and being hard and tough saves your feelings. I wish I could heal the whole of society from this horrible misconception. But for now, let’s look at a few ways being vulnerable can benefit you as an individual.
 
How opening up is the best solution
 
1. Your self-worth increases
 
This might sound strange, but your self-esteem gets higher the more vulnerable you become. All that bragging and showing how tough you are behind your wall means nothing. What has true meaning is being able to share your feelings, including, shame.
 
Yes, it is okay to feel shame at times, just make sure it’s valid, and not something someone told you to feel. Vulnerability can make you realize that everyone has both strengths and weaknesses and this is what helps you realize your worth.
 
2. It helps you be present
 
Being in the moment, right now, and feeling the truth of what you feel is amazing. Better yet, sharing those feelings, despite the fear you may have is liberating.
 
Some people hold in their feelings because they’re afraid of losing people they love, but in the process, they cause intense stress within which affects the mind and body. Being present and being unafraid of what you’re feeling is one of the best mindsets around.
 
3. You can be happier
 
Not being vulnerable means we become numb to our true feelings. Did you know that? Yep, it means that resentment pent up inside, and that shame hides underneath those feelings of unhappiness. Well, just like the bad feelings hiding away, the good feelings are doing the same things.
 
You cannot possibly be truly happy unless you’re vulnerable. Without vulnerability, you are fake and anyone you try to love will be fake as well, at least most of the time. So, to be happy and find a truly happy person like you, stop holding all that good and bad inside.
 
4. Builds intimacy in relationships
 
Let me tell you, true intimacy does not reside outside of vulnerable states. But because of all the heartbreak and divorce, being vulnerable is probably the scariest action in relationships.
 
People are afraid. They are so afraid of being hurt, rejected or left, that they create a person that doesn’t even exist. Here again, you see them building walls and practicing false personalities.
 
They do engage in intimacy, but it feels held back, stiff, and uninvolved. It’s as if we keep so much of ourselves locked away during the intimate time. We rather pretend like intimate acts are no big deal and simply walk away from a potentially healthy relationship.
 
Being vulnerable will help you wade through the maybes and find the one who is truly right for you. Intimacy with the right person will be amazing.
 
5. Teaches compassion
 
If someone else is being vulnerable about something negative they have done, instead of getting angry straight off, you can have a bit of compassion. This is where being vulnerable comes in.
 
Being a person who can exhibit vulnerable attributes can help others who are being vulnerable because they can either relate, or they can help the other person put away shame. Then forgiveness can be attained, which is the true benefit here.
 
6. Helps innovation and connection
 
Vulnerability can also be a benefit in the workplace. So many people are afraid to speak up about new ideas or criticisms at work, especially in meetings or in the presence of the boss. But, if you can become courageous enough to voice your concerns, you’ve opened up a dialogue that makes coworkers tap into their vulnerability as well.
 
If you want to see coworkers making connections, then vulnerability is the key. Your ideas and concerns can also profit your workplace as well.
 
Being vulnerable is a strength, no doubt
 
If you think about all the good points of vulnerability, you will see the strength in using this attribute. Remember, everyone has a vulnerable side, but few of us are fearless enough to use it.
 
That’s the key right there. If we can take control of our fears, we can use our vulnerabilities, not to harm ourselves and others, but to help others come out of their shells as well.
 
I encourage you to open up and let go today. You can start small, practice your vulnerabilities and see what happens.
 
References:
 

Sherrie Hurd

 

 

Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us. 

 

 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 06:33
Sexta-feira, 29 / 11 / 19

Why Is Intrapersonal Intelligence Important and How to Develop It?

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

November 28th, 2019.

 


 
 
In the 1980s, a brand-new theory on intelligence emerged. Developed by Howard Gardner, this theory suggested that there is more than just the one version of intelligence. Instead of the typical IQ test, based on logic and numbers, there are several ways in which a person could be intelligent. These new types of intelligence include linguistic, spatial, musical, inter and intrapersonal.
 
Psychologists had developed this new theory, known as the Multiple Intelligence Theory, based on the idea that being intelligent shouldn’t be limited to a person’s ability to do math or science alone. A person could be incredibly intelligent in all kinds of ways.
 
What Is Intrapersonal Intelligence?
 
A person with intrapersonal intelligence is skilled at looking inwards and understanding themselves. They tend to be more aware of their own feelings, their triggers, and solutions than others are.
 
If you are able to analyze your own behavior and thoughts and understand why it is that you feel certain ways, you could be intrapersonally intelligent. A person who has intrapersonal intelligence is usually easily self-motivated and doesn’t require inspiration from the external world to be productive.
 
If you enjoy being alone, you might have intrapersonal intelligence. Instead of fearing being alone with their thoughts, someone with this intelligence would thrive because they are comfortable with their own being. Being able to understand what has caused your feelings or impulse reactions is a highly intelligent skill to have.
 
Why Is Intrapersonal Intelligence Important?
 
This type of intelligence is essential to living at peacewith yourself. If you’re constantly jumping through emotions, reacting with no idea why and feeling totally unaware of your true self, you’re probably not at peace. “Blissfully unaware” only applies if you’re so detached from yourself that you don’t feel much at all.
 
To be truly content, you’ll need to develop your intrapersonal intelligence.
 
Self-Motivation
 
Some of the most fundamental life skills are self-motivation and self-discipline. These things come naturally to people who are intrapersonally intelligent.
 
We all know the struggle that is forcing yourself to sit down and get some work done, but those with this type of intelligence find it much easier. They don’t rely on external forces, deadlines or pressure to get things done. They are able to connect with themselves enough to create motivation to get started and discipline to get finished.
 
Without intrapersonal intelligence, you’re likely to coast along hoping the work just goes away because you lack the drive to succeed for your own satisfaction.
 
Self-Esteem
 
Intrapersonal intelligence also includes having better self-esteem than most. Not over-confidence, but a stable self-belief and comfort within one’s self. When you know yourself as a friend would, you learn to appreciate your flaws and are better adapted to working on them.
 
Self-awareness and being self-assured will help you to navigate life’s difficulties much easier too. If you aren’t in touch with your inner thoughts, then you’re far more likely to fly off the handle at minor inconveniences and major disruptions alike. A person with intrapersonal intelligence is likely to reflect rather than react when life comes bumpy.
 
When people with this skill become angered or upset, they will have the ability to control their reactions and think rather than lash out. They will be better able to keep themselves calm during trying times because of an awareness of their own needs. If they need to leave, they will. If they need to communicate, they’ll do it with a cool head and be more successful in getting what they want.
 
Brilliant minds like Albert Einstein and Virginia Woolf are known to have been intrapersonally intelligent. By being mindful of their own thoughts and calm in the face of difficulties, they were able to achieve incredible goals.
 
How to Develop Intrapersonal Intelligence?
 
If you aren’t the type to have natural intrapersonal intelligence, you can still develop it yourself. It’s a skill that can be learned to help improve your life and mental wellbeing. There are all kinds of ways to practice getting in touch with your inner self.
Writing
 
The most often recommended way to practice your intrapersonal intelligence is to keep a journal. Writing allows you to talk to yourself in a way you might struggle to do in your own mind. When you have feelings, good or bad, try writing about them in your own private notebook.
 
You could even write as if you were having a conversation with a friend. Tell them about how you feel and consider all the possible causes, it’s highly likely that you’ll start to unfold your own mind.
 
After a while of practicing writing in a healthy voice, you might find that it becomes your own inner voice too. Ultimately, this is the most key part of intrapersonal intelligence to develop. It’ll allow you to access parts of your mind that you usually leave to your subconscious and stay more in control.
 
Meditation
 
You can also try meditation or meditative activities such as yoga, walking or running. These things are all encouraged to help you clear your mind of the clutter and access your real feelings.
 
They allow you to develop intrapersonal intelligence by quieting the noise and letting you slow down. Slowing down your thoughts prevents you from reacting too quickly and promotes your connection with your true needs.
 
Through meditative activities, we can learn more about ourselves and let go of the nonsensewe’ve been carrying. Consider these quiet times as an opportunity to chat with yourself. Like getting to know a new person, you would need a peaceful place to be in the present and share. When you let your mind be peaceful, your conscious voice can chat with your inner needs.
 
Disconnect
 
If you want to get to know yourself, remove influences from the outside world. Our phones, tv screens, computers, they all fill our minds. Instead of avoiding silence by staying constantly connected, try switching off. When you’re left in the quiet, you’ll find it much easier to reconnect to yourself and listen to your own thoughts.
 
Being intrapersonally intelligent allows a person to think clearer and more independently. It promotes inner wisdom and better management of your emotions. No more spontaneous tears or easily triggered anger. Disconnect from the world and the noise around you and you’ll find it easier to set goals and achieve them.
 
References:

Becky Storey
 

 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
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publicado por achama às 09:02
Quinta-feira, 21 / 11 / 19

6 Types of Loneliness and Different Causes of This Universal Feeling

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

November 20th, 2019.

 



 
Loneliness is something we’re all familiar with. It’s almost a compulsory part of the human experience. But, did you know that there are many different types and causes of loneliness? Loneliness isn’t just one blanket feeling, it can be brought on by all sorts of experiences, not just from being alone.
 
Knowing why you feel lonely is the key to resolving it. Finding out what type is causing your loneliness will allow you to start regaining what was lost.
 
6 Types of Loneliness
 
New Situation Loneliness
 
When you move to a new place, start a new job, or join a new school, you suddenly find yourself alone. When you haven’t made any real connections, you’re forced to spend most of your time in these new places without anyone by your side. This is a very lonely experience. Fortunately, we know deep down that this type of loneliness is temporary. It is part of the transition phase, from your past chapters to your new one.
 
This type of loneliness isn’t chronic or, hopefully, too insufferable. When you put yourself out there, the loneliness will fade away. It’s only a matter of time before you start to feel included, and surrounded by company, again.
Surrounded but Lonely
 
So many of us can relate to the feeling of being surrounded by people we love, and who love us and still feeling existential loneliness. Unlike in a new situation, this type of loneliness occurs when everything around us is familiar. We know the people and we know the places, but we just can’t fit in.
 
For example, you could be in a family full of academics. They love you deeply and you love them, but you’re not interested in their academia. You prefer art maybe, or music. In situations like this, you might feel lonely because you can’t join in on their conversations. You also crave company that shares your interests. The case is similar in groups with mixed religious beliefs.
 
When you have no one to relate to, it doesn’t really matter how surrounded by others you are. Loneliness can be an emotional experience, entirely unrelated to how physically alone, or not, you are.
 
Left Behind Loneliness
 
Everyone goes through phases in life. We all progress to new chapters and have new experiences, but we all do this at different speeds. While some of our friends might be settling down and moving on, we could be taking some stages a little slower. It’s totally okay to take life at your own pace, but it can mean that we often feel like we’ve been left behind.
 
When the people we usually rely on for company suddenly disappear to new jobs, new lives and new adventures, they have less time for us. This kind of loneliness could be literally applied when our friends become so busy that they genuinely can’t spend any time with you.
 
It could also be metaphorical, similar to the idea of being surrounded but still feeling alone. If your friends have started families or gotten “proper” jobs before you, then you’ll likely feel loneliness due to suddenly having less in common. This type of loneliness stems from feeling like everyone is too busy for you or that you’re not a priority anymore.
 
Missing Presence Loneliness
 
Have you ever lost someone who used to fill a space in your home? When they go, whether it’s through death or a break-up or just moving away, they leave behind a void. This type of loneliness differs from the rest because it doesn’t discriminate. It doesn’t matter whether you have hundreds of other people who love you or none at all. When that one special person is missing, that’s all that matters.
 
We feel a kind of loneliness that is unaffected by the outside world when we’re rattling around alone in our homes. In some cases, people will even avoid going home, to prevent having to miss their presence. There’s a quiet companionship that comes with living with others, even animals, and when that’s taken away it leaves a hole.
 
Emotional Loneliness
 
Emotional loneliness presents itself when we have no one significant in our lives to share our emotions with. This differs from the other types of loneliness. You could have plenty of friends, but it’s a depth that’s missing. It appears when friendships are superficial or only surface level.
 
We aren’t longing for company; we’re just longing for connection. We all face difficulties and traumas, and we all deserve someone to share them with to help us heal.
 
We feel so lonely without this kind of deep connection. Sometimes the people in our lives just aren’t that emotionally committed to us. Some friends and family are enough to keep us happy and in good company but don’t have the time or depth to take on our emotional needs.
 
We feel a sense of loneliness because we aren’t able to really share ourselves. We’re alone in the sense that we can’t share, and that can be a very ostracizing experience.
 
Romantic Loneliness
 
Romantic loneliness is a common and probably the most relatable of all the types of loneliness. It exists independent of friendships and family company. As a part of human nature, we crave the company and intimacy of a romantic relationship. There is just another layer of companionship that friends can’t provide us, so we long for love.
 
Have you ever been the third wheel when hanging out with friends? These kinds of moments make us feel lonely, despite not being alone. We have a feeling of loneliness because we’re missing a portion of what life could offer. We’re missing that deep connection with another person.
 
Returning to an empty bed every night can be a lonely experience. Only a true romantic connection can relieve the intense feeling of loneliness which results from watching your friends settle down and cozy up without you.
 
Loneliness is a universally understood feeling. From children to the elderly, the rich and the poor, loneliness doesn’t discriminate. You’re never alone, though. There are so many different types of loneliness. No experience is the same, but no feeling is too exclusive either.
 
References:
 
 

Becky Storey


 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


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publicado por achama às 16:12
Sexta-feira, 08 / 11 / 19

The Science of Sensation-Seeking: Why Some People Love Risky and Scary Stuff

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

November 7th, 2019.

 
sensation-seeking.
 
 


Are you the sort of person that loves horror films? Or do you hide behind a cushion at the scary parts? Psychologists call the behaviour of people who love scary movies sensation-seeking. But what draws some of us to risky and scary stuff and not others?
 
The Science of Sensation-Seeking
 
I remember I have always loved scary movies. From a young age, I would beg my parents to let me stay up late to watch Dracula films or the old Hammer House of Horror movies. There was one in particular – The Abominable Dr Phibes – starring the Prince of Horror – Vincent Price, which absolutely terrified me.
 
In the film, Dr Phibes used various tortuous means to kill off his enemies. In one, he drilled a hole in the ceiling of the bedroom of a drugged victim, poured honey through the hole and then let locusts loose to devour her face.
 
That night, I slept with a blanket over my head. In another gruesome scene, he attended a masked ball. He fixed a frog mask so that when it snapped shut it continued to keep closing, eventually snapping the neck of the victim.
 
I was around 10 when I watched these films. Despite pleading with mum and dad and them giving in, I would have dreadful nightmares after watching scary films. Every night, I would beg to watch another horror film.
 
One night, I was absolutely terrified so I kept the light on and played music all night. But still, I kept watching.
 
So, can science explain this morbid fascination with my constant needing to frighten myself? Well, yes. Psychologists call it sensation-seeking. Furthermore, there are two ways people become sensation seekers, nature and nurture.
 
Some people are born with a lower fear threshold
 
Fear comes from the most reptilian area in our brain – the amygdala. This is the oldest part that triggers the automatic fight or flight response. When this happens, our heart beats faster, adrenaline courses through our bodies, and our breathing becomes rapid and shallow.
 
Now, for some of us, these symptoms are excruciating. In fact, just one episode of a fight or flight response or panic attack can lead to a lifelong phobia.
 
However, other people are not affected. You could say that they have a higher tolerance for fear. As a result, they tend to seek out sensations that cause these feelings in their bodies. So people that favour extreme sports like sky diving or bungee jumping are seeking these extreme fear sensations to get the same effect normal people do.
 
Can you experience fear and pleasure at the same time?
 
The ‘nature’ answer would explain why it is possible for some people to experience positive and negative emotions at the same time.
 
Initially, experts believed that some people enjoy feeling scared because of the relief at the end. As humans, we are programmed to seek out pleasure and avoid pain at any cost. As such, it is not feasible for us to experience a negative experience as a positive one.
 
But studies show that sensations seekers are ‘happy to be unhappy’. It all depends on the situation. For example, if we feel safe enough, i.e. watching a film, or riding a roller-coaster, we can relax and revel in the horror.
 
“When individuals who typically choose to avoid the stimuli were embedded in a protective frame of mind, such that there was sufficient psychological disengagement or detachment, they experienced positive feelings while still experiencing fearfulness.” Study authors – Eduardo B. Andrade and Joel B. Cohen
 
Sensation-seekers are not psychopaths
 
This detachment is very important. Before all you non-sensation-seeking folks start labelling us as psychopaths, let me tell you about one interesting study.
 
This study (McCauley, et al, 1994) conducted research on disgust. Real-life documentaries depicting actual horrors were shown to college students. In graphic detail, cows were stunned, killed and slaughtered. A live monkey’s head was struck with a hammer and its brain offered up as a meal. The final video showed the facial skin of child peeled back for surgery. 90% of the students turned off the video before it had finished.
 
Yet, these same individuals would pay good money to watch a gory horror film with much more horror and violence than depicted on the videos. The researchers concluded that the students knew the films were fiction.
 
Therefore, they had a psychological barrier between the horror action and themselves. The fiction allowed them a distance. As a result, they are detached and in control. And it is this sense of fiction that gives us the freedom to seek this sensation of fear.
 
“In fact, there is evidence that young viewers who perceive greater realism in horror films are more negatively affected by their exposure to horror films than viewers who perceive the film as unreal (Hoekstra, Harris, & Helmick, 1999).”
 
Some people learn to seek out fear
 
So that’s the nature explanation, but what about nurture? Can we learn sensation-seeking behaviour? Experts think we can, and I can relate to this.
 
Growing up, I didn’t have a great relationship with my mother. She was cold and distant throughout my childhood. But, the one thing she loved was horror films. Perhaps something in me, even at a young age, knew that I could bond with her if we watched them together. Even though they scared me to death, watching them together did create a sense of closeness.
 
“I once had a client who shared with me that when they were young they used to watch scary movies alongside their mother, and this made them feel safe and that sometimes they even laughed together at the scary scenes,” Kelley Hopkins-Alvarez, a licensed professional counsellor.
 
Studies show it is how you feel afterwards is important. For example, if you watch a scary film with friends and then laugh about it, then that is what you take away from the experience. Not the scary parts of the movie. You’ll remember the friendship parts.
 
This is because our bodies remain in a heightened aroused state. As a result, emotions are intensified. Our friendships seem more intense. Consequently, our experiences after the scary event are cemented in our brains as positive.
 
On the other hand, if our experiences are negative, we will associate this negative feeling with the scary film.
 
Final Thoughts
 
People like to watch scary films for many different reasons. Sometimes we just like what we like and there’s no explanation. For me, it taps into my fascination with the dark triad and evil people. All I know that I will always be a fan of the horror film. And the scarier, the better!
 
References:
 
Janey Davies
 


About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 02:25
Terça-feira, 05 / 11 / 19

All is well, but extremely difficult to prove

Brenda Hoffman.

Channeled Message,

on November 1st, 2019

 
 
 
 
 
 
Dear Ones,
You probably feel that all is not well in your world. Even though we have addressed this issue on several occasions, you continue to worry about your future and that of the earth. For indications are that leaders you once held in esteem are not worth the energy to help them maintain their status. And those you once feared are more evident daily.
So it is there is little for you to attach to other than your inner-world for all else seems counter-intuitive, mean, and self-serving. You assumed that at this stage in your transition, you would be encased in a bubble of joy that excluded those who did not agree with your beliefs.
Even though you no longer believe that separation is possible, such is yet to happen.
You completed each difficult transition phase with hopes that joy would be evident with the next step. But you are so worn out now you no longer expect joy, merely more struggles as has been true for earth eons. Your current reality is that your life is not as pleasant, as was true before you initiated your transition. You are noting the underbelly of the earth and its inhabitants without the sunshine you once believed was a requirement.
Surely, you could not suffer as much as you have during this transition, including the loss of family and friends, without a reward. So it is you no longer care if that reward is of 3D or 5D. You merely need some indication that all you achieved is worth a reward.
Instead, you feel lonely, sad, angry, and yes, fearful. What if there are no rewards? What if the remainder of your earth life is to be in this nothingness without highs, joys, or fun? What if you pushed yourself almost beyond endurance to this flat life that is opposite of what we and others prophectized?
Such is not true. But until you receive some indication to the contrary, you are losing faith that anything is changing. So it is you are becoming surly in your inner anger. Anger and angst, directed at yourself. “Why was I such a fool to believe that I changed the world?”
Those of you in a different place – either before reaching this emotional block or after doing so – cannot understand the angst of your spiritual brothers and sisters. For you are cool, calm, and collected, knowing that all is well.  All is well, but extremely difficult to prove if you are experiencing your dark night of the soul or clearing of your final fear dust bunnies.
You forerunners are in the midst of the earth’s sea change from 3D to 5D. Yet, you are sensing or experiencing a more in-depth 3D than you once thought possible. Part of your discomfort is sensing the general upheaval of all earth beings.
Your views are so different from the general population that you have little in common with them, nor do you wish to find commonalities with most outside your circle. Even those within your circle are starting to demand your help – if not, physically, then emotionally. Those followers expect you, caretaker supreme, to help them through their phases. The same phases you struggled through without knowing where those struggles would lead or end.
Of course, you are angry and fearful. For not only are you in void time, making final preparations for 2020, but those followers connected to you, physically or emotionally, want you to carry them across their finish line. So it is, that whenever you sense a sparkle of joy, a follower either within your immediate circle or those you connect with empathically, call out for help with their issues.
So it is you are having difficulties believing there is a finish line.
Both your rest and nurturing time is limited. Exhaustion similar to your experiences during the first years of your child’s life. When your child cried, it was your duty to determine why they were crying, no matter how tired or busy you were. You were on-call 24/7.  You are falling into that same pattern believing you must care for others – even if you merely sense them – 24/7.
Stop caretaking. Stop feeling sorry for followers. Make them pick up their toys (clearing their fears) instead of doing it for them.
Of course, this command seems nasty, given that no one seems to be asking for your help. Need we remind you that you are both a consummate earth caretaker and Universal sensitive? So it is you are likely sensing cries for help more than you are physically experiencing them. You, with your sensory portholes wide open, catch the emotional cries of beings who do not wish to do their transition work.
Transition work is not easy, as you well know. But you completed your work so that those following were capable of completing theirs WITHOUT your assistance. They are not frail infants who must be cared for. Followers are earth adults and Universal beings. They, just as was true for you, want the easiest route possible – which they know you can provide. For you are capable of holding their pain as they explore their new life. But doing so is harming you emotionally and not helping them complete their transition.
Many of those following are looking for helicopter parents like you to pull them through difficult pieces only they can complete. So it is those of you who are overly sensitive are in a quandary for you are natural caretakers.
Both you and those following must leave this enabling path.
You have created the superhighway those following can branch off of. By doing so, you completed the most difficult part of 5D path creation. Stopping to create a unique path for those following reduces the number of 5D forerunners completing their roles.
Stop caretaking – emotionally or physically. You cannot create a reward for yourself if you are enmeshed in the progress of those following.
Nurture yourself knowing those following are no longer infants, but instead middle school children who want you to do their homework, and cook, and clean for them. They want you to do it all.
It is time for you to say, “NO.” A loud NO that needs to reverberate to those surrounding you physically and those leaking into your empathic being because they are frightened.
Just say, “NO.” 
So be it. Amen.

Brenda Hoffman



If you would like to receive Brenda’s Blogs when posted, please click the Subscribe Button on the upper part of her Blog & Subscribe page and then click the – Subscribe to Brenda’s Blog by E-mail – line. Complete your subscription by entering your e-mail address and accepting the e-mail confirmation.
Copyright 2009-2019, Brenda Hoffman. All rights reserved. Please feel free to share this content with others, post on your blog, add to your newsletter, etc., but maintain this article’s integrity by including the author/channel: Brenda Hoffman and source website link: LifeTapestryCreations.com.
 
 

 
Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 20:17
Domingo, 03 / 11 / 19

The Psychology of Nostalgia: Why Do We Feel a Longing for the Past?

Lottie Miles.

learning-mind.com

November 3rd, 2019.

 
psychology of nostalgia.

 

 
Should we dwell on the past? Until recently, psychologists would likely have argued not to. However, longing for the past, otherwise known as nostalgia, is now gaining recognition as a useful tool for people fighting anxiety and depression. As a result, nostalgia is a growing focus of global inquiry and research in psychology.
 
In this post, we will look at what nostalgia is, what causes nostalgia, and what some of the psychological benefits of nostalgia, and potential pitfalls, can be.
 
What is nostalgia?
 
“A feeling of sadness mixed with pleasure and affection when you think of happy times in the past” (Oxford Learner’s Dictionaries)
 
Coined by a 17th Century Swiss military doctor, the word itself is rooted in the Greek words nostos (meaning longing for a return home) and algos (the pain linked to this longing).
 
Similarly, in “Nostalgia: A Neuropsychiatric Understanding”, nostalgia psychologist Alan Hirsch links nostalgia to a yearning for the past. However, the past longed for is an idealized version of itself, with positive emotions existing in your memory with the accompanying “negative emotions filtered out”.
 
Nevertheless, whilst nostalgia is rooted in a somewhat rose-tinted version of the past, recent studies have shown that nostalgia can offer new perspectives on our present state of being, reminding us of our connectivity with others.
 
Indeed, Hepper et. al.’s study across 18 countries and 5 continents on ‘Pancultural nostalgia’ found nostalgia encouraged feelings of empathy and social connection and even worked as a form of antidote to feelings of loneliness and depression.
 
What causes nostalgia, according to psychology?
 
Whether we are going through tough times, or things are simply changing in our personal lives, memories of simpler times are a common refuge that can provide us solace.
 
Furthermore, research has shown that nostalgia is a common response to change. As such, when we are going through a transition in our lives, be it becoming an adult, reaching retirement age, moving to a new country or even struggling to cope with technological advances, we are driven to nostalgic yearning.
 
Interestingly then, nostalgia is typically caused by negative emotions but typically fosters an improved mood and increases positive emotions. However, this nostalgia comes with a bittersweet taste, since we can only experience the good times intangibly and fleetingly.
 
Moreover, a 1985 psychoanalytic paper on nostalgia found extreme cases of nostalgia could be debilitative due to this search for something that never truly was there.
 
Given this, should we view nostalgia as a malady to overcome or a useful tool to help guide us through turbulent waters?
 
The psychological benefits of nostalgia
 
Researchers into the psychology of nostalgia at the University of Southampton have found that nostalgia can act as a neurological defense system that helps us to overcome negative thoughts or experiences.
 
Nostalgia achieves this as it helps people to achieve a temporary change in how they perceive their current state. This enables them the strength to persevere through hard times. Moreover, by connecting people with their past in their own mind’s eye, it reminds them that their present state of being is temporary.
 
So even if they are feeling isolated in the present, nostalgia reminds them of intimacy they have achieved in the past and reminds them that positive times can lie ahead and that they are not alone.
 
Nostalgia also has benefits for the wider community, with people in nostalgic states having been found in the same study to be more likely to demonstrate altruistic traits and commit to volunteering.
 
Similarly, children who have been encouraged to think about the past more, making them more prone to feelings of nostalgia, were found to be less likely to demonstrate selfish traits.
 
Nostalgia has also been shown to have physiological as well as psychological effects. For example, Zhou et al.’s 2012 study on the psychology of nostalgia found that participants in their study who were left in a cold room were more likely to experience nostalgia.
 
Moreover, they found that those experiencing nostalgia perceived the ambient temperature to be higher and could tolerate colder conditions than participants not reporting feelings of nostalgia.
 
The great news is, a single positive memory last’s a lifetime so even for those with troubled pasts, nostalgia can be a useful psychological tool to draw upon to help people navigate troublesome waters.
 
A cautionary note
 
As already alluded to, nostalgia was previously seen as a malady rather than a potentially useful tool to fight against depression. Indeed, if we allow ourselves to retreat too much into the romanticized past we have created for ourselves, then it can have negative implications.
 
This relates to something Barbara B. Stern termed ‘Historical Nostalgia’, or the desire to escape from the present into an unreachable, imaginary, and idealized past. Therefore, it is important to take care to not rely too heavily on nostalgia as the major benefits are felt in its transitory effects.
 
Nostalgia can be a useful tool to help us overcome challenges in our lives, help us feel connected to others when we are feeling isolated or alone, and even foster improved connections with our community.
 
So next time you feel wistful about the past, enjoy it and let this natural response to life’s changes give you hope for a brighter tomorrow.
 
References:
 
Lottie Miles
 
 



 
About the Author: Lottie Miles


 
Lottie Miles is a professional researcher and writer with a passion for human rights. She has 4 years of experience working within the NGO sector and has a Masters Degree in Social Policy. She has a keen interest in exploring ways in which happiness habits can help to improve mental health and wellbeing. In her spare time, she likes doing crossword puzzles, painting and traveling.
 
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


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publicado por achama às 21:50
Sábado, 02 / 11 / 19

Saudade: A Profound Emotional State You’ve Probably Experienced

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

November 1st, 2019.



 
Saudade is a Portuguese word. Its meaning is so complex that cannot be translated into one single word. It has a notoriously complicated definition which can be difficult to explain. There is no English word that it translates to, instead, we use entire phrases, to sum up, its depth.
 
Saudade is often thought to be a kind of nostalgia, but even that isn’t quite right to describe this profound emotion. When you feel saudade, you are experiencing a deep and profound emotion. This emotion is more akin to yearning, pining and longing.
 
The correct version of saudade defines it as a desire for something that once was. It combines the sadness for something that has gone, whilst still being happy as you think of the memories.
 
For example, you would feel saudade for a loved one who has passed away. You would experience a deep sense of sadness at their loss and long for their return. However, you might also be experiencing happy moments as you fondly remember the good times you shared.
 
Simply put, it is a combination of sadness and happiness directed towards something you wish would come back. Sadness for the loss, happiness for the memories, or thoughts of what could have been.
Saudade and Its Origins
 
Like most words, saudade gets its roots from Latin. Ancient versions of the word can be loosely translated to “solitude”. It wasn’t until the 13th-15th centuries when the word developed its modern meaning in Portugal.
 
During the Great Portuguese Discoveries, men would be sent off on ships to discover new territories and wage wars for possession. Their wives, children and loved ones would be left behind. As the men sailed off around the globe, their families would pine for their return.
 
It wasn’t uncommon for the men to go missing in action. This left their grieving families uncertain if they were dead or alive. Saudade is a word perfectly designed to describe the loss they felt.
 
The country experienced a phase of melancholy among its people. Those left behind would dream with the hope of their return, sometimes naively. They wallowed in the sadness that came from missing their husbands, fathers, brothers, and sons.
 
Joy, however, was also in the mix. The people of Portugal were proud of the achievements their men were making. They remembered fondly the times they had with the men who had left. Their loved ones also tried to stay optimistic about the times they would have after they returned home and the golden age their discoveries would bring to Portugal. The only way to sum this up was “saudade.”
 
In the 20th century, this feeling had a resurgence amongst the Portuguese people. As emigration to America and the rest of Europe became popular, so did this confusing emotion.
 
People who had moved away to start new lives felt saudade for the home they had left behind. They fondly remembered their home country and the people in it. They often longed to be back there, though they knew they had to stay.
 
The new countries they settled in were strange and made them wistful for the familiar safety of Portugal again. As the Portuguese started to describe this feeling as saudade to the people in their new countries, the word started to spread.
 
Saudade Versus Nostalgia
 
Though nostalgia is the closest the English language gets to saudade, it’s still not quite the same. Nostalgia is a feeling you get when you feel happy thinking of the past.
 
We get nostalgic for our childhoods because they were joyful and carefree. We feel nostalgic for old television shows or even music because they remind us of those good times. Saudade is more closely connected to sadness. It is a sense of longing or yearning for the past.
 
Saudade can also apply to more than nostalgia ever could. You can feel it for people, places, phases of life and even things that never happened at all. Unlike nostalgia, which is a joyful memory and even wishful return of the past, saudade can be theoretical.
 
So, How Does It Feel?
 
Saudade can be felt for things that never happened at all, like longing for “the one that got away”. In this case, you would be feeling a deep sadness from missing them and wishing they would be back in your life. You might also feel a sense of happiness when you consider what could have been and the good moments you could have had.
 
Saudade can also come on pre-emptively. Imagine your last summer before leaving for college (even hypothetically). The emotions you feel are a complicated mix of sadness and happiness. Your heart might ache, thinking of how much you’ll miss your home and friends.
 
You might also feel happiness, for all the good times you’ve had. Somehow, this happiness could also make you feel more sadness when you consider all that you’ll be losing. This complicated mix of emotions sums up exactly what defines saudade.
 
In 1912, Aubrey Bell, a Scholar, and Author tried to summarize this in his book In Portugal. It became one of the most renowned descriptions of this untranslatable word:
 
“a vague and constant desire for something that does not and probably cannot exist, for something other than the present, a turning towards the past or towards the future.”
 
This tells us even more that saudade is a nostalgia for something that could have been, not just something you’ve lost. Next time you’re yearning for what was or what could have been, know there is a word for how you feel. Saudade will put a face to the complicated emotions of a bittersweet feeling of loss.
 
References:

 
Becky Storey
 


 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

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publicado por achama às 00:12
Terça-feira, 25 / 06 / 19

How to Practice Modern Stoicism and Why It Will Make You Happier ~ Janey Davies.

How to Practice Modern Stoicism and Why It Will Make You Happier.

By Janey Davies.

June 25th, 2019.

 
 

 



 

Just one glance at the internet and you’ll be deluged with posts promising to reveal the secrets of everlasting happiness. But actually, there is no mystery to being happy, and modern stoicism can show you why.
The word stoic suggests a longsuffering, patient, tolerant person that bears their burden without complaint. However, to imply that this is the route to happiness would be completely wrong. The theory behind modern stoicism is simple.

What Is Modern Stoicism?

In life, we cannot control everything so we should focus on the things we can and accept what we cannot change.
Modern stoicism originates from the Stoics who were ancient philosophers living in Greece. These wise men argued that in order to live happier lives we should decide what things we can change and what we cannot.
Once we have distinguished between the two, we can work at changing what is within our power to do so. Then it is easier to accept what we cannot change as part of life. This might sound like airy-fairy nonsense, but it does make a lot of sense when you consider what is actually under our control.
What can’t we control?
  • What people think of us.
  • Our own bodies.
  • The environment
  • What people do.
What can we control?
  • How we think about all of the above.
  • What judgments we make about those thoughts.

There are two basic principles:

We can’t control everything in life. All we can control is how we think about what happens and the judgments we make, based on these thoughts. And this is where it gets interesting. The ancient Greeks believed that it is not actual things that cause us unhappiness but how we think about them.
When something happens, we make a judgment about it. If we think the thing is bad, we feel upset or angry or grief. It all depends on what the thing is, on how we have perceived and judged it. However, this same thing might not upset another person, indeed, it might even be a joyous event for someone else.
For example, take a World Cup final. The winning team’s fans will be rejoicing. The losers will feel real pain and grief. If you’re not interested in football, you won’t be affected at all.
So, the important thing to remember is that whatever judgment we add to our thoughts gives the thing value. Moreover, it is this value that produces our emotion. The good thing is that we have control over these judgments. Whatever happens, whether it is good or bad, we can decide what value we assign to them. That value will then affect our emotions.
Likewise, this emotion can be happiness or sadness or anything we choose to feel. So while we may have no control over what happens to us, we do have complete control over how we feel about what happens to us. Consequently, we are in control of our happiness.

So how does stoicism work in the modern world?

 

Figure out what’s really important

 
Many people lust after wealth, fame, power, status, but the reality is that few of us are going to attain these things. As a result, a lot of us are going to end up miserable because we haven’t achieved these goals. So why do we value these things? At the end of the day, most of us just want to be comfortable, healthy, have good friends and no stresses or worries.
Consider why you want these meaningless trappings? Is it to impress other people? Perhaps the media tells you that in order to be happy, you have to have the fastest car, the nicest watch, the latest designer dress. Do what makes you happy, not what others tell you.

It’s not about self-belief or positive thinking

 
Consider this scenario; you’ve decided to scale Mount Everest. You’re setting off with no strategy, equipment, guides and you’re unfit. Now, no amount of self-belief or positive thinking is going to get you to the top of that mountain. Modern stoicism is about setting realistic goals that are right for you and that are achievable.
You hear a lot of stories of successful business people where determination and positive thinking was the key to their success. They never gave up and it was their dogged self-belief that spurred them on. But when you consider that 9 out of 10 start-ups fail, it’s obviously not about believing in yourself. It’s about getting the right idea in the first place.

Distinguish whether the situation is under your control or not

 
If something is starting to bother you, try and distinguish whether it is one of those things that’s under your control or not. Think about this as a line that divides the actions of anything that’s out of your control on one side, and your thoughts about those actions on the other side. Then whatever is bothering you, place it either side of the line. Now, you’ve distinguished which one it is, is there anything you can do about it?
For example, a shop assistant is rude to you in the store. You immediately feel angry, but you can’t control the assistant’s actions. Perhaps they are busy and under stress? What you can dois complain about their behaviour to their manager, or you can ask them to explain their rude behaviour.
By dividing what you can control and can’t takes the pressure off you. It removes emotion from situations. It’s actually very freeing. It’s not about letting people off the hook for being rude or aggressive, it’s more about living your life without the pressure of feeling responsible for everything that happens in the world.
My final point is that if you want to start practising modern stoicism, every morning, think about the day ahead, the possible traps you might encounter. Just be ready for them and remember that you can’t control everything, but you can control how you feel about things.
 
References:
  1. http://www.bbc.com
  2. https://www.independent.co.uk
 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

About the Author: Janey Davies.

Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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publicado por achama às 21:12
Quinta-feira, 20 / 06 / 19

9 Signs of a Truly Independent Person: Are You One? ~ Sherrie, learning-mind.

9 Signs of a Truly Independent Person: Are You One?

By Sherrie.

June 20th, 2019

 

Being an independent person doesn’t come from living an easy life. The trials of life make you stronger.

I get angry sometimes when things go wrong. I sometimes lose hope when past hardships repeat themselves over and over. But I think this happens because there is yet something we’re meant to learn. I also think these trials can make prosperous. This means, no matter how hard it gets, I know I can be an independent person.

How strong and independent are you?

Being an independent and strong person comes with a price sometimes. We build walls when experiencing hurt after hurt. The callouses that form over pain and abuse can also leave us a bit insensitive to the feelings of others.
However, that’s not how we all work, or how we should strive to be. Some of us become independent without losing the ability to open up. That’s the focus of our strength.

Anyway, here are signs that you could be an independent type of person. Or maybe someone you know has these traits.

1. You can live alone

Being independent means you can live alone. You don’t need the help of others to survive, and you always find a way to stay financially stable.
You also have no need for occupying the same spaces with other people, unless of course, you want to. You’re so good with yourself that living alone is actually preferable at times.

2. You’re a future planner

While many people say “live in the moment”, an independent and solid person will always plan for times to come. They see the big picture and not the temporary high of present fun and companionship.
I will say it’s good to enjoy each day, but it’s also important to save for the future. Independent people are perfectionists at planning for the future.

3. Saying ‘no’ isn’t hard

For some, saying no is difficult, especially if they are afraid of hurting the people close to them. For dependent people, saying yes, and going along with things is easier than mustering the strength to decline.
People of an independent nature can easily say no and not even give an explanation for their answer. They are bold and present an attitude that says, “I’m saying no just because I want to.”. Do you see?

4. It’s hard to ask for help

Asking for help isn’t hard for some, but for independent and stubborn people, they hate charity. To independent individuals, asking for help means weakness.
Being weak cannot be a part of their plans, for present or for the future. To them, it may even be a sign that they cannot make it on their own if they ask for help.

5. You have few friends

When you’re independent, you have fewer friends than most people. Truth be told, this is because you spend time with people expecting nothing in return.
Now, I don’t know how true this is for everybody, but many of those with many friends often expect favors and help. Since you’re independent, you only see friends as companions. Choosing your friends in this manner helps you realize who you truly appreciate and love.

6. You have an unshakable self-worth

When you’ve become an independent person, you won’t have to get validation from other people. No matter how many insults they use, you will still know who you really are. You will see your value, your beauty, and your loyalty, and nothing can change this.
Of course, there may be times when you’re shaken momentarily, but you bounce back. This helps you see the one who insults you for who they really are. You will know this independent individual by their resilience in the face of adversity.

7. You go out alone

Most of the time, you will go out alone. You love to shop for things alone because you can go and leave as you please. You even like to eat at restaurants alone sometimes.
Being alone in public feels good to you, and it doesn’t leave you empty. You don’t have to socialize with friends out on the town, but you can still have a conversation with people who are already there. It’s an interesting trait.

8. You can lead

When independent, you can take the lead and get difficult things done. You will notice both men and women taking charge of difficult situations, and this usually means they are pretty independent of others.
Sometimes men are intimidated by women who take charge, but unfortunately, this is because they are usually the dependent sort. Strong men aren’t intimidated, they rather help strong women succeed. This can be seen the other way around too but in a slightly different aspect.

9. You’re financially independent

Yes, we already know the independent sort are people who live alone, and they are also those who refuse help. Well, if, for some reason, an independent person just happens to owe money, say for car payments or other financed things, they will most certainly be on time and try to pay off the debt as soon as possible.
They hate owing people anything. It feels like independence is being taken away when you have to borrow money against something.

Being truly independent

There’s a reason people act the way they do. Some are born independent while others grow into these strong individuals because of past trauma or life-long hardship. They’ve learnedtheir own value and potential. An independent person is one of the most exemplary types of human beings to ever exist, and I attain to become more like this as I grow.
Are you an independent one? Do you strive to become more independent? If so, you must take heed if you wish to become more independent that you don’t lose your ability to feel emotions.
If you’re not careful, you can build walls while building your confidence and strength. Here again, as with many other aspects of life, I think balance is the key. So, go forth and conquer.
References:
  1. https://www.theodysseyonline.com
  2. https://www.lifehack.org

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

 

 

 



About the Author: Sherrie

Sherrie is a freelance writer and artist with over 10 years of experience. She spends most of her time giving life to the renegade thoughts. As the words erupt and form new life, she knows that she is yet again free from the nagging persistence of her muse. She is a mother of three and a lifetime fan of the thought-provoking and questionable aspects of the universe.

COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 

 



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Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 19:56
A Luz está a revelar a Verdade, e esta libertar-nos-á! -Só é real o AMOR Incondicional. -Quando o Amor superar o amor pelo poder, o mundo conhecerá a Paz; Jimi Hendrix. -Somos almas a ter uma experiência humana!

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