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Segunda-feira, 18 / 05 / 20

‘Is My Child a Psychopath?’

‘Is My Child a Psychopath?’ 

5 Signs to Watch Out For

Janey Davies, B.A. (Hons)

https://www.learning-mind.com

May 18th, 2020.

is my child a psychopath
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Are you worried about your child? Have you noticed a disturbing mean streak in them? Are they not fazed by punishment? Have you ever been so frightened of your child’s behaviour that you start to ask yourself, ‘Is my child a psychopath?’

‘Is My Child a Psychopath?’ – How to Recognize the Signs

Adult psychopaths fascinate us, but they must have come from somewhere. So, would you be able to recognise psychopathic traits in your child?
Historically, studies into child psychopathy have been carried out retrospectively. In other words, we take the adult psychopath and look into his or her childhood. Adult psychopaths can share several traits common in childhood. The MacDonald Triad suggested three such significant traits:
  1. Bed-wetting
  2. Cruelty to animals
  3. Fire-setting
However, subsequent research has criticised the MacDonald Triad. Instead, studies have shown that traits such as ‘callous disregard’ are more common in children who go onto exhibit psychopathy as adults.
“I remember when I bit my mom really hard, and she was bleeding and crying. I remember feeling so happy, so overjoyed—completely fulfilled and satisfied.” Carl*

Adult Psychopathic Traits vs Child Psychopathy

Speaking of adults, adult psychopathic traits are well-documented. We know that psychopaths tend to exhibit certain behaviours.

Adult Psychopathic Traits

The Mayo Clinic defines psychopathy as:
“A mental condition in which a person consistently shows no regard for right and wrong and ignores the rights and feelings of others.”
Psychopaths make up about 1% of the population. Around 75% are male and 25% female.
Psychopaths share many characteristics. In fact, the Hare Checklist is a specific list of psychopathic traits. The most common adult psychopathic traits are:
  • Lying and manipulation
  • Lack of morals
  • No empathy
  • Superficial charm
  • Narcissism
  • Superiority complex
  • Gaslighting
  • Lack of conscience
So do children share these same traits as their adult counterparts?
“I wanted the whole world to myself. So I made a whole entire book about how to hurt people. I want to kill all of you.” Samantha*

Child Psychopathy

Well, society does not label children as psychopaths. Instead, children with ‘dark traits’ are described as ‘callous and unemotional’. Experts use this callous-unemotional behaviour (CU behaviour) to form a diagnosis.

Examples of Callous Unemotional Behaviour in Children:

Studies into antisocial behaviour in children have captured several common traits in children as young as 2 years old:
  1. A lack of guilt after misbehaving
  2. No difference in behaviour after punishment
  3. Constant lying
  4. Sneaky behaviour designed to mislead you
  5. Selfish and aggressive behaviour when they don’t get what they want
Further research has led to the Youth Psychopathic Traits Inventory (YPI), which is similar to the Hare Checklist. Adolescents answer a series of questions which are then scored to measure the following personality traits:
  • Sense of grandiosity
  • Lying
  • Manipulation
  • Callous nature
  • No remorse
  • Insincere charm
  • Unemotionality
  • Thrill-seeking
  • Impulsiveness
  • Irresponsible nature
Children and adolescents that exhibit many of the above CU traits are more likely to commit anti-social behaviour as young adults and end up in prison.
“Don’t let me hurt you, Mom.” Kevin*

Is a Child Psychopath a Product of Nature or Nurture?

There are some experts that believe child psychopaths are born this way. However, others think it is more likely to be a mixture of genes and environment.
Philosopher John Locke first suggested that children are ‘blank slates‘, filled with experiences from their parents and interactions with their environment. But children are more than that. They come with their own readymade personality. This core personality then interacts with family, friends, and society. The environment shapes this core personality into the adults we become.
So what can cause a child to become a psychopath?

What Are the Causes of Child Psychopathy?

Early childhood abuse

One of the strongest indications of child psychopathy is early abuse in childhood. In fact, neglected, abused, or children that grew up in dysfunctional environments are more likely to show psychopathic tendencies later on.

Attachment issues

Separation from a parent or primary caregiver can have devastating effects on a child. We know that it is essential to form an attachment with our parents. However, the parent in question could suffer from addiction or mental health problems.
In fact, studies show that young female psychopaths are likely to have come from dysfunctional home lives.

Victimisation

On the other hand, young male psychopaths are more likely to have been victimised at an early age. The perpetrator carrying out the victimisation can be a parent or the child’s peers. This reasoning confirms what we already know, in that victims of bullying will often become bullies themselves.

Different brain structure

Other studies propose that children who show CU behaviours have differences in their brain structure. This supports the theory that suggests adult psychopaths have different brains to the rest of us.
Children with CU traits have less grey matter in the limbic system. This system is responsible for processing emotions. They also have an underactive amygdala. Someone with an undersized amygdala has problems recognising emotions in others. Therefore, they lack empathy.
“Kill John and Mommy with them (knives). And Daddy.” Beth*

5 Signs Your Child Is a Psychopath

So we can understand some of the causes behind child psychopathy. But if you ask yourself, ‘Is my child a psychopath?’, what signs should you be looking out for?

1. Superficial charm

These children can appear charming but they are mimicking what they’ve seen other people do. The only reason they appear to be charming is to get what they want.
One way you can identify superficial charm in children is to watch their reactions when someone else is upset or distressed. In normal circumstances, seeing someone upset will be in itself upsetting to a child. They will try and comfort whoever is upset. If your child is a psychopath, they won’t care and it certainly won’t upset them.

2. Lack of guilt or remorse

Children with CU behaviour use their charm to manipulate others. If they want something, they will do anything in their power to get it. If this happens to hurt another person in the process, so be it. They don’t understand that their actions have consequences. All they know is that the world is there for them. Therefore, they can do whatever they want.
So look out for selfishness in your child, one that is not prepared to share with others and one that acts aggressively if their needs are not met.

3. Prone to aggressive outbursts

Most parents are used to toddler tantrums, but the aggressive outbursts from child psychopaths are much more than tantrums. If you feel frightened of your own child’s capabilities, it’s a sign of psychopathy.
One other thing to point out is that these outbursts will come from nowhere. For instance, one minute, everything is fine, the next, your child is threatening you with a knife if you don’t get them a new puppy. The outburst is a massive overreaction to the situation.

4. Immune to punishment

Brain scans have shown that reward systems in callous children are overactive, but they are unable to recognise the usual signs of punishment. This leads them to focus doggedly on their own pleasure without being able to stop, even if it means hurting someone. Moreover, they know that if they get caught, they’ll be reprimanded.
We usually temper our behaviour to match the consequences of our actions. If your child is a psychopath, they know the consequences – they just don’t care.

5. No empathy for others

Does your child seem flat behind the eyes? Do you look at them and wonder if they are capable of loving you? It’s not that they don’t know what love is, they just don’t experience it.
Child experts believe that inactivity in the amygdala is to blame. More interestingly, we know that babies, when given the choice, would rather look at human faces than something like a red ball. Studies reveal that children who exhibit CU behaviour prefer the red ball to a face.
“I choked my little brother.” Samantha*

Can a Child Psychopath Be Cured?

So can child psychopaths ever be cured? Probably not. But their behaviour can be modified.
Research has shown that children with CU behaviour do not respond to punishment. However, because their reward centre in the brain is overactive, they do respond to incentives. This is cognitive morality. So while the child may never recognise emotions or understand empathy, they do have a system that rewards them for good behaviour.

Final Thoughts

Nature or nurture, brain abnormalities, or neglect in childhood. Whatever the reason, seeing callous disregard in children is particularly horrifying. But it doesn’t have to mean a life sentence. So if you suspect that your child is a psychopath, you should know that with proper therapy, even the coldest of children can live a relatively normal life.
References:
  1. www.psychologytoday.com
  2. www.theatlantic.com
  3. www.telegraph.co.uk
  4. nypost.com
*Names changed.
 
Janey Davies
 

 
 
About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2020 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 




Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

 
All articles are of the respective authors or publishers responsibility. 
 


 
No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


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publicado por achama às 12:01
Sexta-feira, 15 / 05 / 20

How the Law of Reciprocity Works and Practical Ways to Use It

How the Law of Reciprocity Works and Practical Ways to Use It

Jamie Logie, B. Sc.

learning-mind.com

May 15th, 2020 .

 

 

The law of reciprocity is all about an action being rewarded with another action in return. But how does this all work exactly, and how do you best use it to benefit your life and the lives of others?
This law is all about spreading to good between us all, and it’s something that more people need to practice. This article will look at how the law of reciprocity works, and some practical ways that you can use it.

What Is the Law of Reciprocity?

The simplest way to look at the law of reciprocity is that you should do unto others as you would have them do unto you. The problem is, this sometimes can take on an ugly form with people only making gestures to get something in return.
This is often used by salespeople who generally have no interest in your betterment and are only out for themselves. They will often give out something for free so the other person feels an obligation to return the favor, which is based around buying a specific product.
We want to ignore this particular aspect that is more about persuasion than it is reciprocity. Instead, we want to focus on reciprocity to spread more joy, support, and caring among one another. This is a law that will usually trigger a positive reaction in another person. When you do even the simplest, kindest gesture, it generally triggers the desire in the person to act similarly.
Reciprocity is about the sense of obligation to return the favor. That may sound like a burden, but we are talking about small, intimate gestures that go a long way in helping us all feel better about ourselves. The act of giving goes a long way in instilling a positive impression in the mind of the other person. And that’s what this is all about; creating as many positive experiences as we possibly can.

What Are Some Ways We Use the Law of Reciprocity Every Day?

You are probably using this law every day, and not even realizing it. A basic example is the idea of a simple smile. When we smile at someone, the other person will usually smile back. Your action is you giving the smile, and the reaction is them returning the smile to you. This is one of the most practical, simple, but still effective ways to practice the law of reciprocity.
We do not understand what other people are going through, and even though they walk around carrying a brave face, they could be suffering on the inside. It’s incredibly powerful what the simple act of a smile can do to another human being and – even for just a moment – it will lift their spirits. That act is returned to you, also causing you a boost in endorphins and a sense of happiness.
This is, of course, the most basic example of this law – but you can see how powerful it really is. Now, you want to continue to put this law into practice as much as possible. What are some other practical ways to use the law of reciprocity?

1. Creating a More Harmonious Home Environment

If things are a bit chaotic in your home, it may seem easier to blow your top than to deal with disastrous situations. Say that you come from work only to discover a mess all around the house. You’re trying to remain calm, but then one of your kids comes running through and knocks a dish off the table, causing it to break. Your child is in near hysterics, and this could end in a total breakdown for everyone, or you could use the law of reciprocity.
It’s not always easy, but in this situation, it would involve not losing your temper and instead, comforting and hugging your child. This would not be the reaction they were expecting while also expecting to be forced to clean it up. Tell your child to go and do something else while you clean it up. It’s not unlikely to find a child resorting to a more peaceful and apologetic situation as they’ve seen the gentle approach you’ve taken and are responding in kind.
By yelling and punishing, you would probably get a similar response. By taking a gentler approach, you allow for inner peace to be created instead of a harsh situation. This is not the easiest thing, but if we do this on a daily level, you will get more positive reactions instead of strife, fear, and anguish.

2. Repay Things as Soon as You Can

This isn’t specifically related to money, but it still applies. One of the most practical ways you can use reciprocity is by returning favors and gestures as soon as you can – even if it’s something small. When you don’t, people can often think you are taking advantage, and that’s the opposite intentions we should go for.
With close friends and family, you may have a little more leeway in the length of time you take to pay someone back because there is a closer intimacy. With people like coworkers or associates, you’ll want to repay them as soon as possible for the reciprocity to work its best.

3. Helping Out A Stranger

We’ve discussed reciprocity with people we are in close contact with, but what does this look like in the outside world with people you don’t know? It’s all about creating the best environment you can in whatever situation you find yourself in. And this can be as simple as holding a door open for a stranger. If it’s an entrance with more than one door, you can be pretty certain they will make sure to hold the next door open for you.
Again, these are small gestures, but reciprocity working like this creates a better sense of community and connection between the people living in it.

Final Thoughts

We all want to live in the most supportive and encouraging society possible. This isn’t always going to be possible, but by practicing the law of reciprocity, we can create the closest semblance to an ideal living situation.
Reciprocity all comes down to being the change you wish to see in the world. If you want joy, kindness, and compassion, it starts with giving it to others. When you do this, you allow it to find its way back to you.
References:
  1. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/
  2. https://www.psychologytoday.com/
 

About the Author: Jamie Logie, B.Sc.

Jamie Logie is a certified personal trainer, nutritionist, and health & wellness specialist. He holds a bachelor of science (B.Sc.) degree in Kinesiology from the University of Western Ontario, studied sociology and psychology at Western University and has a counseling diploma from Heritage Baptist College. He has run a blog and top-rated podcast on iTunes called "Regained Wellness". Jamie is also a contributing writer for places like the Huffington Post, Thrive Global, LifeHack and has an Amazon #1 book called "Taking Back Your Health".

COPYRIGHT © 2020 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

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publicado por achama às 23:14
Sexta-feira, 01 / 05 / 20

6 Types of Toxic People Who Become Involuntary Manipulators

6 Types of Toxic People Who Become Involuntary Manipulators

By Anna LeMind, B.A.

April 30th, 2020

passive aggression.

 
Passive aggression is a favorite tactic for negative, secretly jealous, and insecure personalities. So almost all of the above types of toxic people can use it, especially the approval seekers and the enviers.
They lack the emotional toughness to speak their mind openly and face conflict. Thus, they throw out sneaky comments and wistful statements that make you feel bad and bring them temporary emotional satisfaction.

An example situation:

Your friend Bob tells you about his financial difficulties. He has lost his job and doesn’t know how to pay his bills the next month. You are comforting him and give him advice. At some point, the conversation turns to you and you tell Bob about the detention your unruly son received at school. Bob has an absent expression on his face and says, “I wish I had your problems”.
The result? You are feeling guilty for worrying about such trivial issues while your friend is going through a really difficult time in life. In reality, though, Bob didn’t mean to cause you discomfort or guilt. He is just overly self-absorbed right now because of the hardships he is facing, so anyone else’s problems look like a joke to him.

2. Guilt trips

The needers often use guilt trips to get what they want. In fact, needy people are natural manipulators and may not even know how toxic they can become. Since they are used to relying on others and hanging their happiness on people and external circumstances, they are intrinsically skillful in evoking guilt in those around them.

An example situation:

Ian proposes to Melissa while they’ve been in a relationship for just three months. She is not ready yet and not sure whether Ian is the one, so she takes some time to think it over. One day, Ian tells Melissa about his past heartbreaking relationship and throws out a comment like, “That breakup was a real disaster. It was a struggle to get over it. If our relationship doesn’t work out either, I’m not sure if I can handle it”. As a result, Melissa feels sorry for him and accepts his proposal.
This may sound deviously manipulative at first, but Ian is not a bad person. He is just prone to black-and-white thinking and gets too enthusiastic about people. He also has an intense fear of loneliness and gets emotionally attached to women too easily. So he meant every single word of what he said to Melissa.

3. Playing the victim

Some people genuinely believe that they never did anything wrong and all their failures are due to the outside circumstances. They may blame the unkind people who took advantage of them or the unfair society that ruined their chances to succeed. Maybe they were born in the wrong time or had a too underprivileged family background to achieve anything significant in life. They may even go on to believe that all their misery stems from a generational curse or God’s will.
The core reason for this toxic attitude is that people with a victim mentality are afraid of responsibility. There is always someone or something else to blame for all the adversities life throws their way. So, they have a natural talent for playing the victim and distorting every situation accordingly.
They don’t do it because they are evil manipulators, however. In reality, they are simply too mentally weak to accept their faults and deal with their responsibilities. Many types of toxic people use the manipulation tactic of playing the victim. In our list, the misunderstood genius, the needer, and the complainer will do it more often than others.

An example situation:

Elliot’s business has failed, which totally ruined his motivation. He now stays at home, watching TV all day long and doing nothing. His wife Ashley has a good job and is the only person who is supporting the family now. After a few months, Elliot still doesn’t look for a new job or business idea.
Ashley is tired of supporting the family on her own and at some point, she insistently asks her husband to get a job. Elliot says, “How can you be so heartless? Don’t you see that I’m depressed? These people took from me everything I had worked for so hard and you are suggesting I should just forget about it and work for someone else now?”
Elliot is clearly playing the victim to avoid responsibility and make Ashley feel sorry for him. Still, this is unintended because he is convinced that it’s not his fault that his business failed. Also, he thinks that he is too gifted for a regular 9-5 job, so even suggesting him to get one causes annoyance.

4. Criticism

criticism
Negative and controlling types of people are sometimes so critical of everyone and everything that they become truly toxic. It’s not easy to be around a person who always has to say something critical, unkind, or disproving. Thus, critical people become involuntary manipulators because they make those around them feel worthless and often start conflict out of nothing. Sometimes they do it to feel better about themselves or because they really believe that they are always right.

An example situation:

Jane just got a promotion at work and shares the exciting news with her elderly mother, who happens to be an overly critical person. She gives her daughter an indifferent look and says, “Good for you. Too bad that you still haven’t started a family at this age that you are though. Your younger sister has two children already, and you are still single”.
With this kind of remark, Jane’s mother makes her feel inadequate despite her career achievement. She downplays her daughter’s success and shifts focus to her relationship failures, which is a sensitive topic for her. As a result, Jane starts to doubt herself and feels miserable. She forgets about the promotion and begins to think that her life is a failure.

5. They become parasitic

Some types of toxic people become emotionally or financially parasitic to those around them. Parasitic individuals make their partners, friends, or family members feel responsible for their life. This manipulation tactic can be a combination of guilt-tripping and a victim mentality and is often used by needy people as well as the misunderstood geniuses.

An example situation:

Two adult siblings live entirely different lives. The younger brother Tom has become a successful lawyer while the older brother Jack fails one business after another. Jack has already borrowed a great deal of money from his brother and never paid him back. He is now asking him for a new loan.
Tom has had enough of supporting Jack and denies it to him. Jack says that in this case, the bank will take his house and he will have nowhere to live. Moreover, he feels heartbroken and betrayed by his brother. He accuses Tom of being ungrateful for all the good things he did to him. Jack even goes on to remind him how he babysat him and helped him with homework when they were children.
The situation now looks like Jack is a victim and Tom is a villain. This makes the younger brother feel guilty and ironically, responsible for his older brother’s life. As a result, once again, he decides to give Jack the money he is asking for.
As you can see in this example, Jack is inducing unjustified guilt in Tom. In reality, he is just exploiting his brother as it’s much easier to borrow money from a wealthy family member than to find a job to pay off your debt. But Jack is doing this unconsciously. He may genuinely believe that he has done too much for his brother, so Tom owes him.

The Involuntary Manipulators Are Those Types of Toxic People Who Don’t Mean to Do Harm

In the end, the individuals we discussed above have no ill intent. These unconscious manipulators are usually pretty good folks at their core but just lack mental strength, which makes them use unhealthy coping mechanisms.
So the bottom line here is that these types of toxic people tend to be deeply unhappy and discontented with themselves, hence their manipulative tendencies.
This means that they are more likely to change and stop their toxic behavior than devious manipulators like psychopaths or narcissists, who have the power to make you question your sanity. Establishing firm personal boundaries is often enough to stop their toxic influence.
Does any type of these toxic people sound like someone in your life? Please feel free to share your experiences with us.
 

Anna LeMind
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

About the Author: Anna LeMind

Anna is the founder and lead editor of the website Learning-mind.com. She is passionate about learning new things and reflecting on thought-provoking ideas. She writes about science, psychology and other related topics. She is particularly interested in topics regarding introversion, consciousness and subconscious, perception, human mind's potential, as well as the nature of reality and the universe.
 

Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.
 
 
Discernment is recommended.
 
 
All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 



 

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publicado por achama às 02:11
Sexta-feira, 01 / 05 / 20

5 Signs a Lack of Self-Awareness Is Hindering Your Growth

5 Signs a Lack of Self-Awareness Is Hindering Your Growth

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

April 29th, 2020

 

When you have a lack of self-awareness, you might feel a sense of inner chaos. You won’t know why you do the things you do, or what motivates you to do them. You just flow through life with no real direction.
Self-awareness is all about knowing yourself. If you are self-aware, then you’re in touch with your wants and needs. A self-aware person understands their own personality and what makes them tick. You would know yourself like you know a friend and accept their strengths and weaknesses all the same. With self-awareness comes a sort of calmness. You’re aware of your true inner self and are able to make changes or accept what you have to.
If you lack self-awareness, you’re hindering your personal growth. You can only work on your flaws if you can identify what they are and why you have them. Similarly, you can only play to your strengths if you know what they are.
Understanding if you are suffering from a lack of self-awareness is the first step to take when you’re hoping to achieve some personal growth.

5 Signs of a Lack of Self-Awareness

1. You’re Defensive

Being able to accept flaws and failures is a skill that very self-aware people have. If you lack self-awareness, then you’re likely to be unable to process and understand criticisms well. Without a genuine and balanced view of your inner self, it’s going to be easy to rock you with slight complaints.
Some people who have a lack of self-awareness will be defensive of themselves when someone gives them a critique. Instead of seeing themselves in a realistic light, they see what they want to see. This means everything they believe is rocked when someone has a complaint.
Rather than listening to the feedback you’ve been given and taking the information on board; you go straight to the defensive. You’d rather argue for hours about your shortcomings than accept that you’re flawed. This is because of a lack of connection with yourself. If you don’t know how to communicate with yourself, even the smallest criticism will feel like an attack.
Surprisingly, this could also apply to compliments. If you’re lacking in self-awareness, you might only notice your flaws. Instead of being in touch with yourself in a balanced way, you can only see one side. You might be defensive when receiving compliments, assuming it’s a joke or that the offering was just plain wrong. You could find yourself arguing back, giving defensive reasons why you shouldn’t accept the compliment.

2. You Have No Control Over Your Emotions

Knowing yourself means knowing your emotions. If you can’t identify the emotions you’re feeling or the triggers that caused them, then you’re likely to have a lack of self-awareness. People who have no control over their emotions tend to fly off the handle regularly because they aren’t able to settle themselves. When you have a good sense of self-awareness, you become able to not only identify your triggers but identify what you need to do to solve them.
Having no emotional control means often avoiding situations that might be emotionally arousing. If you’re used to being unable to handle how you feel, then you probably choose not to experience emotions at all. This sounds smart at surface level, but living means embracing emotions – good and bad.
Having a lack of self-awareness with little emotional control will put your friendships, relationships, and career at risk. No one enjoys being around a person who spirals out often with no real understanding of why. You might get angry too easily or be too quick to become hysterical at minor negative moments.

3. You Never Take the Blame

Similar to being defensive, making excuses is a way of rejecting your flaws. There is always a reason for your behavior or decisions that don’t even involve your own shortcomings.
For example, being late for an event. Instead of admitting that you should have done better, you’ll find a hundred excuses. There was traffic, your alarm didn’t go off, your dog ate your shoes. Self-aware people are much better at saying sorry, and that they’ll simply try harder next time.
Your excuses may be totally valid at times. The difference between having or lacking self-awareness is the ability to take on board what you might have learned (for example, to set an extra alarm next time) and admitting a failure this time. A sign of personal growth is being able to accept a mistake without anger or embarrassment.
People who lack good self-awareness also consider themselves to be innocent bystanders in life. They acknowledge that something isn’t right, but they are convinced that they aren’t to blame. Everyone else is. Group projects fail because of the others, right?
If you don’t see the connection between your actions and the outcome, then you’ll never grow as a person. No more excuses, no more shifting the blame. By developing a connection with your inner self, you’ll be better able to accept that you haven’t been at your best and allow that to help you grow.

4. You Are Never Satisfied

If you don’t truly know yourself, you won’t know what you really want from life. If you have a lack of self-awareness, you won’t be truly aware of your hopes and dreams. This means you’ll just be floating through life, doing what feels right for the time being, but isn’t given you that feeling of fulfillment.
Without that inner connection, you’re destined to lead a boring life. You’ll simply feel stagnant. Stuck in a “just alright” life because you never got in touch with your true self. When you get to know yourself as a friend, you’ll know where you want to be. Knowing what motivates you to get up each day will propel you forward.
Similarly, in your relationships, lacking self-awareness will mean you accept treatment and a lifestyle that doesn’t make you feel satisfied.

5. You Have Beliefs You Do Not Understand

Perhaps the most obvious sign of having a lack of self-awareness is having beliefs you can’t explain. These might be religious or political, or just morals and values you navigate your life by. Instead of having self-awareness that causes you to connect with your inner self, you’ve just taken on the beliefs of the crowd. This crowd might be the people you spend your time with now or the way you were taught to believe as a child.
If you can’t fight for your beliefs and answer the question “why do you feel that way?”, then you might be lacking in self-awareness. You’ve taken on ideas at a superficial level because it’s what you’re used to. You haven’t developed the thought and meaning behind these beliefs as people with self-awareness do.
When you look inwards and get to know yourself, you might realize some of those beliefs don’t sit well with you anymore. You might even see you have important values that you never knew you had.

A lack of self-awareness forces you to live a surface level life.

Your career, relationships, and friendships may never feel meaningful enough because you don’t know what you genuinely want. Being self-aware could have the power to change your life. When you give yourself time to become self-aware, your personal growth will take off, and you’ll begin truly living your best life.
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://www.inc.com
 
 
 
 

 

Becky Storey
 

 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
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publicado por achama às 01:22
Domingo, 26 / 04 / 20

3 Signs of Gaslighting at Work: Is Someone Doing It to You?

 

3 Signs of Gaslighting at Work: 

Is Someone Doing It to You?

Janey Davies, B.A.

https://www.learning-mind.com

April 26th, 2020.

 
 
 

 
Anyone who is interested in psychology might have heard of the term ‘gaslighting’ in regards to a romantic relationship. But gaslighting at work is a relatively new phenomenon. So what are the signs and how can you tell if you’re being gaslighted at work?

What Is Gaslighting and What Are the Origins of This Term?

The term ‘gaslighting’ comes from the 1944 film Gaslight, in which a husband gradually convinces his wife that she’s going mad. We call this form of manipulation gaslighting because in the film the murderous husband attempts to drive his wife insane by convincing her she’s imagined the dimming gaslights in their apartment.
In fact, the lights dimmed because the husband was searching for her aunt’s jewellery. Whenever the wife tries to talk to her husband and discuss the dimming gaslights, her husband denies it ever happened.
He manipulates her into thinking she’s imagined it. He also manipulates the environment they both live in. For example, he denies there are noises coming from the attic (a result of his frantic searching). He consistently misdirects, confuses, flatly denies, and forcibly insists on certain details. In the end, the wife cannot resolve her version of reality to that of her husband.
So gaslighting is a term that describes abusive behaviour that manipulates the environment to make a person doubt his or her sanity.

Why Do People Use Gaslighting?

People gaslight for several different reasons:
  • A need for power
  • Wanting to control the other person
  • Having to conceal something
  • Feeling insecure
  • Jealous of your success
  • Want to get ahead of you

Examples of Gaslighting at Work:

  • Questioning your version of events
  • Rearranging schedules without informing you
  • Taking credit for the work you’ve done
  • Spreading malicious gossip and then denying it
  • Blaming you when things go wrong
  • Pretending they cannot understand you
  • Bullying you in front of colleagues
  • Going into a rage with you but being all smiles to others
Anyone can use gaslighting at work, from your immediate boss to a co-worker or even a client.

Here Are Some More Specific Examples of Gaslighting at Work:

We all tend to judge people by our own standards. On the whole, we believe that people are honest. As a result, it’s really confusing to be confronted with someone who consistently gaslights you. At work, it’s not just confusing but can affect your career, not to mention your mental wellbeing.
Examples of gaslighting at work:
Your boss told you that you had until the end of the month to complete a report, but today, she swears she told you it was due by this lunchtime.
You are always left off important email threads by a colleague who insists they sent it to you. When you question their actions they accuse you of over-reacting and being a drama queen.
Your manager takes credit for your idea and then manages to convince you that he had to do a lot of work to get it presentable.
Your co-worker is talking about you behind your back, but when you confront them, they deny it, saying it’s all in your mind.
So, how can you tell if someone is gaslighting you at work? Look out for the following signs.

3 Signs of Gaslighting at Work

  1. You feel as if something is off with a particular person whenever you interact with them

Do you come away from meetings with this person feeling undermined, confused, or disorientated? Normally, you are a confident member of society, with no issues, you’re no shrinking violet in the workplace. But there’s just something about this new boss or co-worker that tilts you off-balance.
You come away from interactions with them thinking something’s off, but you can’t put your finger on it. Trust your gut. Step back from the situation. Ask a colleague or a family member about your concerns. Try and put the situation into perspective.
  1. You’ve started to second guess and doubt yourself

Have you gone from a confident worker to someone that now constantly double-checks their work? Do you feel as if your memory is worsening? For example, you don’t trust yourself to remember important dates, deadlines, or meetings.
Do you feel as if you’re losing the plot sometimes? Like you’re going mad and can’t rely on your own judgement anymore? Are you doubting your capability to do the job? Do you feel depressed about the thought of encountering this person on a daily basis? Remember, it’s not you, it’s them.
  1. You are constantly accused of being too sensitive

Have you always prided yourself on your ability to take it on the chin? That you have broad shoulders and can take a joke? Have you always been self-deprecating, but now, you’re always being told you are too sensitive or that you’re a drama queen?
Do bosses tell you to man-up and get with the programme? Are you always feeling overwhelmed? Are you afraid of being accused of over-reacting, so you keep quiet? Do you feel isolated and helpless?

My Experience of Gaslighting at Work

I have an example of a gaslighting co-worker from an old job I had on the railways. A co-worker (let’s call her BS Sue) told me that she suffered from narcoleptic epilepsy and that her mother had died from brain cancer. Of course, I was immediately sympathetic. But BS Sue would start contradicting herself. One minute, her mother was 6 stone on her deathbed, the next week, she was 4 stone. One week, she’d died of brain cancer, the next month, it was breast cancer.
Things started to not add up. Then a fellow co-worker asked me out and we started dating. By this time, I’d moved in with BS Sue. The three of us kind of became an item in that we all went out together and would go out for meals together.
Then, something strange began to happen. My then-boyfriend from work started going off me. I would come home and find him and BS Sue sat together on the sofa, all cosy. When I arrived home, they’d stop talking.
Eventually, I moved out and ended the relationship with both of them. I found out later that she was spreading rumours that I slept around, I was cheating and that I was horrible to my boyfriend. I confronted her and she had a breakdown, screaming at me, ‘Everybody leaves me in the end!’

4 Ways to Deal with Gaslighting at Work

  1. Make notes of every incident so you have a record of the abuse when you go to HR and report it.
  2. Avoid one-on-ones with the perpetrator. Try and get any meetings or discussions in public where others are present.
  3. Write everything down, for instance, dates of meetings or deadlines for reports. Get the gaslighter to sign off on it.
  4. Set clear boundaries as to what you are expected to do as part of your job and what’s not expected.

Final Thoughts

We spend an awful lot of time at work, so gaslighting is particularly damaging. Call it out when you see it and remember, you’re not going mad.
References:
  1. www.britannica.com
  2. www.tandfonline.com
  3. Image courtesy Wikimedia Scene from the 1944 movie Gaslight with Charles Boyer and Ingrid Bergman

Janey Davies



About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2020 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

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publicado por achama às 21:18
Sábado, 25 / 04 / 20

The Guarded Personality and Its 6 Hidden Powers.

The Guarded Personality and Its 6 Hidden Powers.

By Anna LeMind, B.A.

April 24th, 2020

guarded personality powers behaviors traits.

 
An individual with a guarded personality struggles with showing their affection to other people. If someone you love is a guarded person, you know exactly what it means.
This is not a person who will tell you he or she loves you a dozen times a day. S/he will hardly ever tell you this. They will not give you compliments or express their affection in any other way. They won’t be using lovey-dovey names either. And of course, they will never talk about their feelings. Sounds familiar? If your loved one behaves in this way, it seems that you are in a relationship with a guarded person.
Yes, a person like this is not easy to deal with in a relationship. This kind of emotionally distant behavior may feel like they just don’t care. However, in reality, nothing could be further from the truth. Guarded doesn’t equal cold-hearted. More often than not, guarded people are deeply caring and loyal but have no way to show it to those they love.
Now, the question is, is there something wrong with people who have a guarded personality?

Why Do People Become Guarded?

Guarded behavior tends to stem from a person’s innate personality traits or early childhood experiences. But this is not always the case. Sometimes, you become guarded as a result of disappointments and emotional wounds.
Here are the most common factors that shape a guarded personality:

1. Innate personality traits

Inborn aspects of the personality such as a temperament type or introversion/extroversion can lead to guarded behavior in relationships.
It often has to do with emotional unavailability. However, when we say that someone is emotionally unavailable or detached, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they are cold-hearted. It may simply mean that a person lacks emotional intelligence or has trouble expressing their emotions.
Moreover, studies show that while qualities like empathy and emotional intelligence can be improved, they tend to greatly rely on hereditary factors. Thus, your guarded loved one may be this way simply because of his or her genetic makeup.

2. Lack of parental love

Sometimes people become guarded because they, in turn, were raised by guarded and emotionally unavailable parents. And it’s not only about the genetic predisposition that we discussed above.
You see, it’s a vicious circle. Emotionally distant people don’t give enough affection to their children, and as a result, these children develop into emotionally distant adults.
Parental and especially maternal love is a basic factor that determines your approach to relationships as an adult. When your mother is emotionally unavailable, you don’t have a healthy example of handling and expressing emotions. And since most children unconsciously learn from their parents’ behavior, you may grow into a guarded adult too.

3. Trauma or negative past experiences

Sometimes we get overly withdrawn and guarded as a result of negative experiences such as a painful breakup or trauma. Once again, the roots of the guarded personality may be hidden in a person’s childhood.
Being a victim of childhood neglect or abuse distorts your ability to process emotions and form healthy relationships as an adult. You may suffer from mental disorders such as social anxiety. As a result, you develop trust issues and an intense fear of rejection and become overly cautious about approaching other people.
Similarly, negative relationship history can make you behave this way. For example, you may have been betrayed, cheated on, or taken for granted. You may have been through a few toxic and abusive relationships. Or maybe you feel like you attract the wrong people all the time and are disappointed with a fruitless search for the right partner.

4. Reserved personality

 
introvert in modern society
Many introverts struggle with expressing themselves in a relationshipBeing an introvert is not to say that you are a guarded person though. It just means that you are more restrained when it comes to showing your emotions and communicating your intimate thoughts to those around you.
So you won’t see an introvert calling someone a ‘bestie’ or a ‘friend forever’ a couple of weeks after meeting them. We are very careful about what we say and will never throw out big phrases like ‘I love you’ without actually meaning it.

The Hidden Power of the Guarded Personality

Living with a guarded personality looks like a challenge, doesn’t it? As a guarded person, you never meant to be cold and distant – it is just a behavior that comes naturally to you but doesn’t always reflect your true feelings.
You often want to tell your dear ones how much you care about them, but you simply… can’t. It is as if some invisible force is holding you from showing your love. It feels utterly awkward to even use affectionate words in your speech.
However, despite all these struggles, guarded people have many powerful qualities. Here are some valuable traits of the guarded personality:

1. They are self-sufficient and independent

Being a guarded person often equals being a loner with a reserved personality. Yes, sometimes, people may be so disappointed and hurt that they don’t let anyone in, even those who deserve the risk.
But if you were born this way, having a guarded personality means that you are independent and self-sufficient. So you really don’t need anyone except for a couple of close people you can trust.
And it’s a great power because you rely only on yourself and don’t put your happiness in someone else’s hands. As long as you are not lonely and too withdrawn from society, being guarded can be a smart approach to dealing with people. After all, you can’t blindly trust and open up to those around you. So a certain degree of caution is always necessary.

2. They value quality over quantity

Someone with a guarded personality won’t waste their time on the wrong people. They are self-sufficient and are doing fine on their own, remember? So hanging out with people who make them feel bored or being in a bad relationship just doesn’t make sense.
For this reason, guarded people will never have big social circles full of fake and toxic friends or just random personalities they don’t resonate with. They will keep their circle small but high-quality.
A guarded person may have just a couple of friends throughout their life, and they are perfectly fine with it. Their first priority is to make sure they don’t waste their time on the people who don’t deserve it. And of course, they don’t want to let the wrong people in and get hurt.

3. They have realistic expectations about life and people

More than ever before, we have too high expectations when it comes to relationships and life in general. To the point that they become unrealistic. We constantly see perfect lives, flawless faces, and fairytale-like love stories on social media, TV, and movies. As a result, we start to look for things that simply don’t exist.
But guess what? These dream-like lives and idealistic relationships exist only on the screen. If someone’s life or marriage looks perfect on Instagram or Facebook, it doesn’t mean that this is true in real life too. Guarded people know this better than anyone.
A guarded person never expects too much from others. Quite the opposite, to say the truth. If you were hurt in the past, at some point, you no longer believe in fairytales. Being guarded when it comes to feelings also means that you don’t get overly enthusiastic about people. And it’s a wise thing to do.
Having a realistic approach to relationships means not expecting too much from people and accepting them just the way they are. After all, keeping your expectations low, or at least realistic, is a sure way to avoid too many disappointments.

4. They have firm personal boundaries and know the value of privacy

 
guarded personality personal boundaries
A guarded person won’t tolerate invasive people who don’t respect others’ personal boundaries. Such individuals threaten their sacred personal space, so they will just withdraw. You won’t see a guarded personality become a people-pleaser either. They know how to say no and set clear and firm personal boundaries.
And of course, they will respect other people’s boundaries too. A guarded person will never become nosy or rude. They know the value of privacy and personal space too well to do that.

5. They read people and understand their motives

As you grow older, you learn to read people and their motives. Especially if you’ve had a few bad experiences with relationships and friendships. Yes, sometimes, you may become a little too cautious and even paranoid. But more often than not, your gut instinct is right about people. I would say that a guarded person has a kind of radar that detects toxic, shallow, and fake personalities.
You quickly understand if someone is going to take advantage of you. Or if you just don’t vibe with that person. You read the nuances in their behavior, and if something is not right, you just withdraw. Being on your own is much better than being surrounded by the wrong people.

6. They are real

Finally, guarded people possess a quality that is becoming increasingly rare in our world – they are real. They will never fake their feelings or personality traits. A guarded individual may not be the nicest or the most easy-going person you will ever meet, but they will probably be the realest one. If you manage to approach and make friends with a guarded person, you will get a loyal and authentic friend.
They will never lie or pretend for the sake of being polite or to take advantage of someone. If they don’t like you or don’t agree with you, they won’t pretend that they do. This also means that a guarded personality won’t tolerate these behaviors in other people.
Not caring about impressing others or pretending to be someone you are not is a great power. Our society has become too fake and needs more genuine people, even if they don’t seem nice and warm at first.

There’s More to the Guarded Personality Than It Seems

As you can see from the above, being guarded comes with certain struggles but also powers. If you have a guarded person in your life, cherish them. It’s because they are probably the most loyal and authentic person you will ever meet.

Do you resonate with the description above or know a person who fits it? Share your thoughts in the comments below.
 

Anna LeMind
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

About the Author: Anna LeMind

Anna is the founder and lead editor of the website Learning-mind.com. She is passionate about learning new things and reflecting on thought-provoking ideas. She writes about science, psychology and other related topics. She is particularly interested in topics regarding introversion, consciousness and subconscious, perception, human mind's potential, as well as the nature of reality and the universe.
 

Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.
 
 
Discernment is recommended.
 
 
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publicado por achama às 05:08
Segunda-feira, 20 / 04 / 20

5 Signs the Proud Person in Your Life Is Just Arrogant.

5 Signs the Proud Person in Your Life Is Just Arrogant.

Lauren Edwards-Fowle,

M.Sc. & B.Sc.

learning-mind.com

Posted March 19th, 2020.

 
 

 

Pride is the great quality of appreciating your successes and having confidence in your endeavors. However, when does pride become toxic and become a manifestation of arrogance? Could the proud person you know be just conceited? Do you sometimes feel that your significant other isn’t proud but has reached the tipping point of becoming arrogant?

What is the difference between pride and arrogance? Let’s take a look at how to work out whether a proud person is just conceited.

Defining pride:

The dictionary defines pride as:
“Feeling self-respect or pleasure in something by which you measure your self-worth; or being a reason for pride.”
Feelings of pride reflect your emotions arising from an accomplishment. Feeling proud of yourself is linked to an achievement or success that has rewarded your efforts with positivity.
Pride doesn’t just relate to yourself; you can be proud of others or proud of group achievements. It connects with other feelings, such as honor, dignity, and self-respect. Pride is justifiable and has an identifiable reason.
Confidence is not a bad trait, and being proud of your successes can lead to improvements in self-esteem. The problem, of course, comes with overwhelming pride, and when confidence eclipses those positive character traits and becomes arrogance.

Defining arrogance:

Arrogance is not the same thing as pride; a proud person is not necessarily conceited. Being arrogant is similar to other negative perspectives:
  • Vanity
  • Conceitedness
  • Selfishness
  • Disrespectfulness
An arrogant person believes himself or herself to be superior to others, whether or not they have a logical reason to think so. They consider themselves more valuable, their contributions more important, and have excessive expectations of their abilities.
This leads to dominance, an elevated impression of a person’s talent, and a lack of regard or respect for other people around them. Conceitedness is not justifiable, is not necessarily linked to any achievements or successes, and applies only to that person’s opinion of themselves.

Signs that a proud person is just arrogant

1. They demand to be the center of attention

People who have achieved great things have every right to be proud. However, talent speaks for itself, and sometimes the most successful people shy away from the limelight. A conceited person will insist on being the center of attention at all times.
This can manifest as:
  • Talking over people in conversation
  • Raising their voice to be heard, or drowning out others
  • Turning every subject around to talk about themselves
  • Having a dominant personality
  • Refusing to let anybody else make decisions

2. They feel threatened by other proud people

Somebody who has much to feel confident about will welcome interesting conversations, personal challenges, and meeting new people. If you are confident in yourself and have a healthy level of self-respect, it is unusual to feel intimidated by others.
An arrogant person will often feel ‘at risk’ when confronted with other people who, perhaps, would be able to spot the flaws in their persona and contradict their boasting of accomplishments.

3. They are often irritated or annoyed by people they perceive as weak

Selfish people don’t have much time for others, and will usually try to surround themselves with a social group they consider to be their peers. Conceited people also often attempt to ingratiate themselves with connections with greater achievements than their own, either to gain a higher social status or because they believe themselves to be on a par.
Likewise, an arrogant person will find quieter people or those they consider to be weak an annoyance. They do not have empathy, will not be willing to spend any time with people who don’t further their objectives, and will quickly become frustrated and annoyed.

4. They always believe themselves to be right

Vanity means believing your ideas, suggestions or thoughts to be far superior to those that anybody else could come up with. Arrogant people are uncompromising and extremely difficult to work and live with.
Have you ever seen somebody watching an expert on the news, or viewing a professional sports event, and insist that they know better, or could have done a better job? That is an example of excessive pride, whereby a person truly thinks his or her power of thought, and physical performance is better than anybody else’s – no matter how much evidence there might be to the contrary!

5. They have no respect for other people

If people have an extremely high opinion of themselves, they probably don’t have much room in their psyche for considering anybody else.
A person with excess pride will often show this in lots of small ways, which can conclusively point to their lack of respect for other people:
  • Always being late
  • Never doing a favor for anybody else
  • Having high expectations from the people in their lives
  • Being unwilling to show any generosity
  • Speaking over people
  • Putting the phone down without saying goodbye
  • Interrupting constantly

Conclusion

Being proud and confident are not bad qualities to have. Everybody should feel a sense of pride when they have achieved something difficult, or shown resilience and forbearing. However, arrogance is something quite different, and spending a lot of time around it can be draining.
If you think that the proud person in your life may be arrogant, perhaps now is the time to address the problem. They may not realize that their behaviors have gone too far, and being conscious of how they come across could be a wake-up call to reel in the temptation to dominate every relationship.
An innately conceited person might not be capable of change, in which case the best thing to do is to consider your capacity to manage and cope with their personality. If it is harming you, and you constantly feel exhausted by having to make up for their bad behavior, it may be time to start putting yourself first.

 

Lauren Edwards-Fowle
 
 
Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 

 

 
About the Author: Lauren Edwards-Fowle


 
Lauren Edwards-Fowle is a professional copywriter based in South East England. Lauren worked within Children's Services for five years before moving into the business sector. She holds an MSc in Applied Accountancy and BSc in Corporate Law. She now volunteers within the community sport sector, helping young people to live healthier, more productive lifestyles and overcome the barriers to inclusion that they face. With a keen interest in physical wellbeing, nutrition and sports, Lauren enjoys participating in a variety of team sports in her spare time, as well as spending time with her young family and their dog Scout.
 



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Alternative to Google
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Alternatives to YouTube
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

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publicado por achama às 00:39
Segunda-feira, 30 / 03 / 20

What Is Cognitive Ease and How It Blocks Your Critical Thinking.

What Is Cognitive Ease and How It Blocks Your Critical Thinking.

Janey Davies, B.A.

https://www.learning-mind.com

March 29th, 2020.

 
 

 
Now before you start reading this article, I just want to promise you it is not a political piece. I am only using an event in recent British politics to highlight a way of thinking called cognitive ease.
Last December, the Conservative Party won the General Election with a huge majority not seen since WWII. This is despite the fact that many voters disagreed with their policies and preferred the Labour manifesto. So what went wrong? Cognitive ease, dear readers. Cognitive ease.
I say again, don’t worry, this isn’t a political article. It’s the easiest way I can tell you about this particular way of thinking. Let me explain. Going into the election the Conservatives had a very brief and succinct message. It was: ‘Get Brexit Done’
On the other hand, the Labour party was wishy-washy about where they stood on Brexit. Their leader told the UK he would be an ‘honest broker of the people’ (whatever that meant, no one really knew). He wouldn’t take sides and the Labour party message was one of ‘we’ll go with want the people want’, or something like that. I don’t recall. And that’s the problem.
The Conservatives won a massive majority. After the dust had settled, many people cited the clear message from the Tories about Brexit. It was easy to understand they said. They knew what it meant. It was catchy, concise, and simple to remember. It chimed well with the public. Audiences took to it.
On the other hand, no one understood what Labour was trying to say.
The Conservatives won because they took advantage of cognitive ease. So what exactly is it?

What Is Cognitive Ease and How It Works

Put simply, cognitive ease is the ease in which our brains process information and this then has a direct impact on how we then view that information. In other words, if something is easy to understand, like ‘Get Brexit Done’, we immediately understand it and we view it in a positive way.
Not only that, but the easier a thing is to process and understand, the more time and effort we’ll invest in it. Conversely, when something becomes harder to understand, and we need to take more of a mental effort, this leads to a negative view. In fact, we can become suspicious, distrustful and lose confidence.
The problem is that not everything in life is easy to understand. If it was, Einstein would never have come up with the theory of relativity. So why are we drawn to cognitive ease?
It’s because we are most likely to believe what is familiar and what is easy. Going back to the ‘Get Brexit Done’ slogan again, even when members of the opposition told the British public that Brexit absolutely would not ‘be done’ in a matter of months (which was what Boris Johnson had been saying) because it would take years to negotiate the trade deals, we all ignored them and voted him in.

Familiarity Breeds Cognitive Ease

So the phrase became so familiar that in the end, it was the truth. Studies show that if something is repeated enough times, we believe it. There’s an old saying: ‘a lie travels around the world several times before the truth is putting its shoes on‘.
This repeating something until we are familiar with it is the mere-exposure effect. Many people use this to their advantage, including politicians. The purpose of repeating a certain phrase is that it gives us a sense of cognitive ease. Our brains don’t have to work that hard because we’ve heard it before, therefore, it must be true.

Simplicity Is Key

Again I’m using the Brexit phrase because it is so simple it was so effective. When something is simple, it requires less processing and that gives us cognitive ease.
For example, if I give you two options, Option A is very simple to understand and Option B is extremely difficult, then I ask you to choose which option you prefer, statistically, you are more likely to say Option A.
This is because you find option A easier to understand and we like things we understand. We find them easier to process. They take less mental strain.

Cognitive Ease Validates Our Existing Beliefs

But there’s another reason why cognitive ease is such a pervasive thought behaviour and that is the information we think is true and right and that we already understand makes us feel better.
Information that is consistent with what we already believe validates our opinions. We are more likely to accept information that already fits in with our belief systems, with our values. It’s like big green ticks along all our confidence boxes.
Conversely, information that is inconsistent with what we believe is held up to much greater scrutiny. We don’t easily accept it as we do information we already believe in. In fact, the opposite is true.
We instantly distrust it, we look at the source of the information, and we dislike the characters that are talking about the information. We find reasons to dismiss the information.
This is because it is taking us much greater cognitive processes to dissect the information than the simple or familiar stuff.
The problem is that cognitive ease is a cognitive bias and a shortcut to processing the world around us. As with all cognitive biases, they can distort our thinking. So how do we stop falling into the trap of cognitive ease thinking?

How to Avoid Cognitive Ease Thinking

  • Accept different views
  • Don’t believe because something is simple, it is true
  • Don’t believe because you’ve heard it before, it is true
  • Listen to as many different people as you can
  • Don’t get trapped in an echo chamber
  • Be wary of the feel-good response that cognitive ease thinking gives you
  • Start accepting that feeling uncomfortable is a sign you are thinking properly

Final Thoughts


It’s hard to escape the trap of cognitive ease. When we feel validated, we get a rush of confidence and our mood is lifted and we are happy. But it’s important to realise that some factions of society use cognitive ease as a way of fooling the public. So be on your guard. Is something too simple? Do you keep hearing or seeing it? It could be cognitive ease.


Janey Davies



About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
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publicado por achama às 17:59
Sábado, 28 / 03 / 20

How Mass Hysteria Is Making the Pandemic Worse and How to Cope.

How Mass Hysteria Is Making the Pandemic Worse and How to Cope.

Janey Davies, B.A.

https://www.learning-mind.com

March 28th, 2020.

 
mass hysteria.

 
 
 
I like to think of myself as a fairly rational and calm person, but in the last few weeks, I have felt close to tears. Since the coronavirus has taken hold, I have seen mass hysteria on an unprecedented scale.
 
Never before in my lifetime have I witnessed empty supermarket shelves, people walking around wearing masks and daily updates from the government. It seems as if we are living in some kind of nightmare. Common-sense no longer applies. Rules are turned upside down.
 
In times of hardship and struggle, we pull together, we hug each other and visit our family and friends more often. However, we can’t do that with this new threat. Instead, we must self-isolate and socially distance ourselves.
 
Our normal routines and daily lives have to follow a strict safety code. No more unnecessary travel. Only shop for essential products. If you do go out, stay 2 metres apart from other people. It’s enough to bring on mass hysteria.
 
What Is Mass Hysteria?
 
It is a psychological condition shared by groups of people who feel threatened by a certain event or person. There are many examples of mass hysteria throughout history.
 
 
Examples of mass hysteria
 
Salem Witch Trials
 
In late February 1692 in a small village called Salem, Massachusetts, two young girls began having fits. They would twitch and shriek uncontrollably. The parish and community blamed the fits on witchcraft and singled out women who had supposedly afflicted these young girls.
 
Soon the numbers started to rise and eventually many more were showing signs of witchcraft. In 1693, more than 200 women had been accused of witchcraft. In fact, 30 were convicted and 19 were executed.
 
Remember, only two girls were ill, but it ended up with countless of women being held captive and subject to ridiculous ‘witch tests’.
 
The Louisiana Twitching
 
Talking of twitching, in early 1939, one Louisianan schoolgirl developed a strange twitch in her leg. Suddenly the twitching spread to others. The number of cases rose sharply but no doctor could pinpoint the problem.
 
All tests came back negative. Meanwhile more and more girls were succumbing to this strange leg-twitching phenomena.
 
Parents removed their children from schools, refusing to allow them back until the cause was known. After a few weeks, the incidences of leg-twitching seemed to calm down, but what had caused the outbreak in the first place?
 
Those who investigated narrowed it down to one girl – Helen – who had the first symptoms. Helen couldn’t dance. In fact, she hated dance classes but was worried that her boyfriend would be tempted by another girl who was a better dancer than her.
 
She pretended to have an uncontrollable twitch in her leg so that she could get out of dance class and have a readymade excuse to her boyfriend.
 
The Bin Laden Itch
 
After the tragic 9/11 attacks of 2001, reports started to surface of children complaining of a strange skin rash. The rash could last from just a few hours to a couple of weeks. But doctors and parents were none the wiser.
 
Some parents started to speculate that this could be a result of a bioterrorist attack. Remember, at the time we were all terrified about viewing the broadcast of the two aeroplanes.
 
People started calling it the Bin Laden Itch after an extraordinary number of elementary students appeared to come down with this rash. As more and more children fell victim to the rash, so did the panic and hysteria begin to rise. So what was the cause?
 
The Center for Disease Control investigated. They found that because of the initial fear of a biological attack, children and parents had been paying closer attention to their skin. More cases were reported and numbers rose. In fact, it was these rising numbers that started the mass hysteria.
 
The problem with mass hysteria
 
So what about today and the virus that everyone is talking about? Has mass hysteria led to panic buying in supermarkets? Does the constant updating of cases and deaths help to fuel our anxiety? Are the orders from governments beginning to scare us?
 
It’s really not surprising that people are becoming hysterical. We feel overwhelmed by the sheer scale of events when we are bombarded with information from many different sources.
 
However, despite the fact that we are all living in very crazy times, there is a real problem when it comes to mass hysteria.
Mass hysteria can lead us to believe things that are simply not true.
  • It can also fool us into thinking the problem is much worse than it really is.
  • It can change our behaviour and make us act foolishly or selfishly.
  • It leads to the spread of misinformation which only fuels our anxiety even further.
  • How to cope with mass hysteria
 
It is true that this pandemic is more deadly than the recent outbreak of swine flu in 2009, but that doesn’t mean we need to panic.
 
Take, for example, the SARS epidemic in 2003 which killed around 10% of those who caught it. Not to mention the MERS outbreak, which killed 34% of those infected.
 
So far, this virus is not as deadly as SARS and MERS. Today there are around 600,000 confirmed cases and a mortality rate of 4.4%.
 
And what does this tell us? Well, with SARS and MERS we weren’t seeing massive shutdowns and forced changes to our behaviour. But the facts and figures speak for themselves. Coronavirus is no more deadly than the last few recent epidemics the world has had to face.
 
Final thoughts
 
In these strange and unprecedented times, it can be easy to sit at home and worry. If you feel anxious and hysterical, remember, it’s easy to pass this onto others.
 
Instead, why not go to reputable sites like the World Health Organisation and get the facts from the horse’s mouth. You’ll feel much better, I promise.
 
Meanwhile, stay safe.
 
References:

  1. www.verywellmind.com
  2. www.businessinsider.com


Janey Davies



About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 19:09
Quarta-feira, 25 / 03 / 20

Social Distancing from an Introvert’s Point of View.

Social Distancing from an Introvert’s Point of View.

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

March 25th, 2020

 

 
 
Our world is plagued with fake people who pretend to be something they aren’t. It’s not unusual to fall for a fake, no matter what they’re pretending to be. Sometimes, we just trust too easily. When you fall for a fake empath’s lies, it could be emotionally or mentally damaging. For your own sake, it’s a good idea to know what to look for when spotting a fake.
 
Despite how wholesome being an empath is at its root, there are still people who make it into something less than that. Fake empaths are, unfortunately, common. People claim to have this gift for all sorts of reasons. Often, fake empaths are narcissists.
 
Empaths and narcissists are on opposite ends of the same spectrum. They insist that they are highly sensitive to other people’s emotions and can “just tell how you feel” in order to manipulate you in some way for their own gain.
 
What Is an Empath?
 
A real empath is a person who can tune in, or feel, the emotions of others. This extends to animals and even the emotional “vibe” of certain places. Oftentimes, empaths are portrayed as having a psychic ability similar to mind reading.
 
Fake empaths particularly love the recognition that comes with this theory. While some might believe in the psychic aspects, others lean more towards the idea that empaths are just highly sensitive to emotions and actively try to feel the emotions of others.
 
Real empaths are born with their abilities and may never know they have such a gift. They may live their entire lives assuming that it’s normal to pick up on everyone’s emotions so easily. With or without their knowledge, empaths use a whole array of tools to understand another person’s emotions. These include body language, tone of voice and even the words a person uses. Fake empaths are unlikely to even notice such subtle changes.
 
For strongly empathic people, distance has no impact on their abilities. Even live TV, documentaries and reality shows can give emotional impressions to an empath. For this reason, real empaths will often avoid seeing shows that are heavy with emotion.
 
 
5 Differences between Fake Empaths and Real Empaths
 
1. They Want to Diagnose You
 
Fake empaths want to tell YOU how YOU feel. Instead of simply trying to understand and be in tune with how you feel, as a real empath would do, they want to read you. They want to diagnose your feelings and they want everyone to know about it.
 
For example, imagine you’re having a hard time and have been a little quieter than usual. A real empath would naturally feel this and would understand why. Be it anxiety or maybe sadness, they’ll feel it too. They probably won’t tell you that they feel your emotions too, they’ll just try to help without making a fuss.
 
A fake empath will turn it into a guessing game, without a sympathetic approach. They just want you to notice that they’ve “read you”.
 
2. They Don’t Take “No” Well
 
If a fake empath comes up with an incorrect assumption of you, which is most likely, they won’t handle being corrected very well. Fake empaths pretend to be this way for attention and to feel like they have a special power that makes them superior, and sometimes even god-like.
 
Whilst a real empath would be apologetic and uncomfortable if they had been wrong about how you felt, a fake one would be defensive. They’re likely to insist that you’re wrong about your own emotions. After all, they’re the ones with the magical powers, right?
 
3. They Will Note Your Negative Emotions, Not Positive Ones
 
Fake empaths want to feel like they’ve caught you out, so they’ll try to reveal emotions you would be keeping secret. If they think you’re angry at someone, they’ll announce that “they can feel it” because they’re empathetic. The same goes for any sadness or discomfort they might think you have.
 
Real empaths enjoy when others feel positive emotions because they can feel it too. They get to share in the good feelings and they’re happy to tell you they’re experiencing the same emotions. Fake empaths won’t bother with noting your positive emotions, because they’re not as exciting or dramatic enough to get them attention.
 
4. They Tell Everyone They’re Empaths
 
There are very few signs that make it clearer that someone is not an empath than them telling everyone that they are. Real empaths don’t need or want the attention and confusion that comes from sharing their abilities. If you reveal that you can feel the emotions of others, you’re likely to be met with questions. Fake empaths love this. They crave the attention.
 
5. They Blame Emotional Influence
 
As a real empath, you’re constantly taking in the emotional experiences of the people and places around you. This can be fatiguing and will have some impact on your own mood. Fake empaths will let this be an excuse for their bad moods and bad behavior, while real empaths would never.
 
Real empaths understand that it is possible to be influenced by the outside world, but they wouldn’t let it become negative or impact the people around them. If emotions get too strong, they would rather take themselves away for a while than hurt their family or friends.
 
Fake empaths will become angry and even rude and snappy, then blame it on the influence of others instead of taking responsibility for lashing out.
 
Fake Empaths Can Be Dangerous
 
Fake empaths are particularly dangerous people because of their assumed control over your emotions. In order to protect yourself from these people, it’s important to know the differences between things a fake empath and a real one. If someone in your life shows signs of being fake, it’s best to stay away.
 
References:
  1. https://www.psychologytoday.com
  2. https://medium.com
 
 
 

 

Becky Storey
 

 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

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publicado por achama às 23:11
Segunda-feira, 23 / 03 / 20

How to Avoid Emotional Distancing in Times of Social Distancing

How to Avoid Emotional Distancing in Times of Social Distancing.

Lottie Miles, M.A.

learning-mind.com

Posted March 22, 2020.

 
Emotional Distancing social Distancing.

 
 

 
When we feel lonely or overwhelmed by the situation we are in, we can easily fall into the trap of emotionally distancing ourselves from others. In this post, we will look at how you can avoid emotional distancing when socially distancing.
 
The effects of the coronavirus have been more far-reaching than most of us could ever have imagined. Fortunately, all of us can successfully help prevent the exponential spread of coronavirus. What we need to do is to reduce our social contact with others by practicing ‘social distancing’.
 
This means cutting down on all non-essential contact with others even if we are healthy ourselves. However, when we spend more time on our own or in close quarters with just one or two others, we can sometimes feel lonely.
 
What Is Social Distancing?
 
“Remaining out of congregate settings, avoiding mass gatherings, and maintaining distance (approximately 6 feet or 2 meters) from others when possible” – Center for Disease Control
 
Social distancing refers to steps taken to reduce our social interactions with other people to stop the spread of infections. This usually involves curtailing all contact that is purely social and sometimes staying away from work and school even when healthy.
 
It means limiting face-to-face time with our loved ones and our friends if we do not live with these groups. It means doing this, even if we personally show no symptoms or are unlikely to suffer an extreme reaction to the coronavirus.
 
Coronavirus is highly contagious and an estimated 15% of cases will require hospital care, with a further 5% requiring ICU care. For this reason, social distancing is vital to stop the spread.
 
Social distancing can help hospitals with limited resources and prevent the speed of virus spread. Moreover, it can buy time for the global community to find vaccines, cures, and source vital equipment to help those who need it before more lives are unnecessarily lost.
 
Why Is Social Distancing Important?
 
The value of social distancing is shown most starkly in the contrasting death rates between South Korea and Italy which both saw 10 people killed by the coronavirus at about the same time.
 
With social distancing and an effective testing program in South Korea, under 100 people have died from coronavirus, compared to almost 5,000 deaths in Italy as of late March 2020. Ultimately, by practicing social distancing, you can save lives.
 
What Is Emotional Distancing?
 
Emotional distancing can occur if we live on our own, with friends, or with a partner. Typically, we can be drawn to isolate ourselves emotionally when overwhelmed by demands in a relationship or other stresses.
 
As the discussion above shows, we have a lot to be overwhelmed by at the moment. Moreover, practicing social distancing can lead to us feeling lonely because of our physical separation from others.
 
Fortunately, there are steps we can take to help stop us from feeling lonely. The first step is recognizing when we may be becoming emotionally distant.
 
 
Below, we outline 3 ways to avoid emotional distancing during social distancing
 
These will help us all feel connected during these emotionally challenging times.
 
 
Practice emotional connectivity
 
Spending time alone can help us to reconnect with ourselves emotionally. We also have to try and remember that being alone physically does not have to mean we feel alone mentally. We can realize this by practicing feeling emotionally connected by remembering things we have done with others in the past. This could be acts of kindness people have done for us or acts of kindness we have done for others.
 
We can also feel more connected to people by taking the time to think about who we care about as well as ourselves. This could be a small group of people close to you or broader.
 
Simply by recognizing our care for others and taking time to think about this, we can feel more connected to others. We can also engage with supporting the people more isolated than ourselves by organizing collectively to minimize our overall social contact.
 
 
Stay virtually connected
 
Not being able to see people face-to-face can be hard. Thankfully, with video calls, text, email, and phone calls, we can feel much closer to our nearest and dearest when socially distancing. It is a great idea to ramp up this form of connectivity as we more stringently socially distance ourselves from others.
 
Indeed, we may find ourselves benefiting from more regular contact with our loved ones than if we could simply pop round. We can give ourselves space from those we share close quarters with and foster relationships with those further away.
 
 
Practice kindness and gratitude
 
If we are socially isolating or socially distancing with others in our homes, then we can become emotionally distant with those we share physical space with. We can combat this by being open and honest about how we are feeling.
 
Early on, it can be beneficial to recognize some of the aspects of ‘quarantine’ that you may find challenging. Whilst we can be tempted to evade things that make us feel uncomfortable, avoidance coping can be unhealthy.
 
Actively practicing kindness to one another and ourselves can help to make us feel closer to each other. Do you find yourself feeling distant or irritable with those you share space with? Actively focusing on being kind and grateful to have them is a way to stave off emotional distancing.
It can be tempting to see ourselves as invincible to the consequences of the coronavirus.
 
However, it is important to remember that our actions have consequences for others as well as ourselves. Socially distancing has been shown to be vital in the fight against coronavirus. It is something we all need to take seriously.
 
Fortunately, when socially distancing ourselves from others, we can remind ourselves that we are connected emotionally as well as physically. By realizing this, we can avoid emotionally distancing ourselves during social distancing.


 

 

Lottie Miles

 






 
About the Author: Lottie Miles


 
Lottie Miles is a professional researcher and writer with a passion for human rights. She has 4 years of experience working within the NGO sector and has a Masters Degree in Social Policy. She has a keen interest in exploring ways in which happiness habits can help to improve mental health and wellbeing. In her spare time, she likes doing crossword puzzles, painting and traveling.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 00:18
Sábado, 21 / 03 / 20

Social Distancing from an Introvert’s Point of View.

Social Distancing from an Introvert’s Point of View.

Becky Storey.

https://www.learning-mind.com/

March 20th, 2020

 

 

 
 
 
We’re living in strange and unprecedented times right now and it can all feel a little overwhelming. We’re (hopefully) all pulling our own weight and following the advice of professionals. Together with keeping up our hand washing and general cleanliness in public places, the whole world has been given one clear instruction – practice social distancing.
 
Before the Coronavirus (COVID-19) Outbreak, I had never heard the term “social distancing” and I think it’s fair to say I’m not the only one. It is a new phrase sweeping the globe and it’s been a bit of an adjustment for some. But for the others, we’ve have been practicing social distancing all our lives without even noticing.
 
Being an introvert and social distancing go hand in hand.
What Is Social Distancing?
 
Governments and medical professionals all over the world have requested that we all practice social distancing. This strategy’s aim is to reduce and slow down the spread of the virus, so we don’t overwhelm our medical services and hospitals.
 
The rules of social distancing are simple, and incredibly attractive to an introvert. Stay in your own home as much as possible – easy. Avoid gatherings and large crowds – delightful. Work from home and avoid public transport – done and done. If you do have to go out, avoid other people – what more could we want!?
 
If we all follow these rules, even if we feel completely healthy, we can prevent the virus from spreading must further and we can minimize the risk of vulnerable people catching it.
What Is Social Distancing to An Introvert?
 
Whilst everyone else is panicking about what they’ll do during this time of social distancing, introverts aren’t feeling much different at all. We all feel the stress and the fear, but being self-isolated isn’t the issue.
 
We’ve honed the art of being alone after years of voluntary isolation. Except, to an introvert, it’s not isolation at all, it’s necessary me-time. Constant social interaction, large crowds and being out in the world all day can be exhausting for an introvert. Our homes are our safe places that we retreat to for refueling. It is now a government instruction that we have to stay home as much as possible, which means never running low on fuel at all.
 
Most of us introverts will understand the nerves that arrive on Friday as we start to worry that we’ll be invited out. Weekends are prime time for parties, loud gatherings and late nights. Fridays are for planning your excuses. What better excuse than a government-imposed social distancing scheme.
 
“Sorry, I can’t go out. The Government says no.” There’s never been a more legitimate excuse since our Mothers were in charge of our schedule.
 
Even better is the reduction in invites altogether. Suddenly there is no expectation to get out there and overwhelm and exhaust yourself. We are free to be as introverted as we need.
What Can Extroverts Learn from Social Distancing?
 
Extroverts thrive in the presence of company. For some, it truly is the more the merrier. Their love of being around others could make this time of social distancing feel quite difficult. Fortunately, there’s plenty to be learned from their fellow introverts.
 
What better time than now to learn how to be comfortable in your own company. A great skill to have is the ability to entertain yourself and be alone with your thoughts.
 
Extroverts tend to have a habit of filling their time and mind so much that they don’t have to consider their deeper thoughts. It’s time to start learning who you really are and what you really want. This quiet time could totally transform the way you think if you use it well.
 
Extroverts are often busier people in general because unlike an introvert, they excel in “full-on” situations. Busy work lets you ignore your thoughts and any troubles that might be brewing under the surface. Social distancing is forcing us to slow down. No more mindlessness. This time brings opportunities for quiet activities extroverts might normally avoid. Try meditation, baking, yoga or writing.
 
What Has Social Distancing Taught Introverts?
 
Introverts love to be alone, or maybe at best with our close circle of loved ones. Unfortunately, this forced social distancing is making even the most introverted amongst us miss the company of others.
 
As an introvert myself, I already feel like I’ll never take for granted or roll my eyes at invitations to be with friends or family. We all need a little company sometimes. People may be loud and a bit much sometimes, but surely, it’s better than staying away from everyone and everything for an uncertain amount of time.
 
During this time of uncertainly and anxiety, revel in the opportunity to grow and learn as people. Extroverts should be taking social distancing as a chance to practice peace and quiet. Introverts love the space to think and just be as they are.
 
Extroverts could gain so much perspective by taking on some introverted traits while we wait this phase-out, just as introverts could learn an awful lot from those extroverted traits we covet. Introverts should be using this time to be a little more grateful for communities, for the ability to socialize. It’s barely been a week and I’d give just about anything to be in an overwhelming loud crowd right about now.
 
 
References:
  1. https://www.who.int
  2. https://www.psychologytoday.com
 
 

 

Becky Storey
 

 




 

About the Author: Becky Storey


 
Becky Storey is a professional writer who has been passionate about the way we think and the human mind since she developed chronic anxiety many years ago. Now she loves to write and educate people on mental health and wellbeing. When Becky is not writing, you’ll find her outside with her Labrador, sitting behind a jigsaw puzzle, or baking something with too much sugar.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

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publicado por achama às 20:29
Sexta-feira, 20 / 03 / 20

What Is Willful Ignorance and 5 Examples of How It Works

What Is Willful Ignorance 

and 5 Examples of How It Works

Lottie Miles, M.A.

learning-mind.com

Posted March 19, 2020.

 
Willful Ignorance Examples.

 
 
 
Willful ignorance is built on the deliberate avoidance of evidence that doesn’t match one’s existing beliefs. This can be a defense mechanism as it allows us to create a world we feel safe in, akin to confirmation bias.
 
However, it is also often apparent in behavior that is socially harmful. In this post, we will explore what willful ignorance is and explore this in examples of how it works in everyday life.
 
What Is Willful Ignorance?
 
As already outlined, it necessarily involves the deliberate omission of information in a decision-making process. If we are unaware of information, then we would simply be ignorant of something.
 
It can appear in all sorts of ways in our everyday lives, from ignoring issues that make us feel bad to rejecting irrefutable evidence that doesn’t match our world view. Willful ignorance is also sometimes termed willful blindness, as in Margaret Heffernan’s interesting exploration of the topic. She notes that:
 
“what we choose to let through and to leave out is crucial. We mostly admit the information that makes us feel great about ourselves, while conveniently filtering whatever unsettles our fragile egos and most vital beliefs”
 
Being willfully ignorant can sometimes protect the brain and work as a defense mechanism. It helps people overcome situations they would otherwise find too much. However, in extreme cases, it can actually lead us to take certain courses of action that can be harmful to ourselves or others. It can also prevent us from taking necessary actions that we should do but do not.
 
5 Examples of How Willful Ignorance Works in Everyday Life
 
Being deliberately ignorant about certain matters can help to protect us from scenarios we cannot face. However, being too willfully ignorant can also lead us to cause social harm. It can prevent us from making changes in our lives and be potentially dangerous for our entire existence.
 
Here, we outline 5 different ways willful ignorance plays out in our daily lives from the mundane through to the serious.
 
Sport
 
Sport offers a useful way to explore common benign ways people enact willful ignorance in their lives. For example, be it basketball or soccer, if you are the player on a team, more often than not every decision that goes against you appears to be wrong.
 
Even though sports stars know their actions are on video, they can still appeal against decisions seemingly convinced that what they just did, didn’t happen. Equally, fans watching the game may employ willful blindness to the bad actions of players on the team they support.
 
Creationism & Intelligent Design
 
Creationists necessarily have to create new narratives to explain away evidence for evolution. Rather than looking at evidence as building blocks, creationist science seeks to manipulate the building blocks until they match the existing ideology.
 
Indeed, both creationists and intelligent design ‘scientists’ have to ignore hundreds of studies. These studies verify certain facts of evolution confirmed at both a micro and macroevolutionary scale so they cannot be confronted, only circumvented. This protects them on an emotional level by defending their world view.
 
Education
 
Self-deception through willful ignorance can have beneficial and detrimental effects when it comes to education. For example, if we receive a low score in a test and blame it on the course content not matching the exam, we may feel better about ourselves. However, to do this, we may need to ignore the fact other people we know scored highly on the test.
 
If we feel okay with a low score, we may not take the time to reflect on what we could have done differently to achieve a better result. As such, it is important to recognize if we are willfully ignoring things that may help us take positive actions in our lives.
 
Health
 
A common area where most people will have a personal understanding of willful ignorance is being healthy. In this case, being willfully ignorant can have negative consequences for the individual and society at large.
 
We all know smoking is bad, alcohol is bad, ice cream is bad. However, this fact alone is insufficient to prevent many of us from consuming these things. This is akin to cognitive dissonance. But there are ways we can recognize and overcome this way of thinking and being.
 
Health also provides an example of where willful ignorance can harm others as well as ourselves. For example, according to the WHO ‘vaccine hesitancy is one of the top 10 global health threats’.
 
Movements like the anti-vaxxers have grown in popularity, especially in Europe. This has seen a rise in people unsure about the safety of vaccines. In fact, 21 percent of the global population is now feeling this way.
 
Climate change
 
Climate change perhaps best represents how being willfully ignorant can be both useful as a defense mechanism and socially harmful to ourselves and others. More and more people are experiencing climate change distress. Thus, a certain amount of willful blindness is necessary for many people in order to protect their mental well-being.
 
However, if everyone practices willful blindness about the issue of climate change, then climate catastrophe for most on the planet will lie ahead.
 
Final Words
 
From this exploration of common examples of willful ignorance in everyday life, it is clear that it is somewhat of a double-edged sword. It can be an effective defense mechanism protecting us from events that challenge our comfortable world view. But it can also have negative consequences if we leave it unchecked.


 

 

Lottie Miles

 






 
About the Author: Lottie Miles


 
Lottie Miles is a professional researcher and writer with a passion for human rights. She has 4 years of experience working within the NGO sector and has a Masters Degree in Social Policy. She has a keen interest in exploring ways in which happiness habits can help to improve mental health and wellbeing. In her spare time, she likes doing crossword puzzles, painting and traveling.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

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publicado por achama às 01:01
Quinta-feira, 19 / 03 / 20

Persecution Complex: What Causes It and What Are the Symptoms?

Persecution Complex: 

What Causes It and What Are the Symptoms?

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

March 19th, 2020.

 
persecution complex.
 
 
 
Do you sometimes feel that everyone is against you? That the world has it in for you? Or that people are out to get you? You could be suffering from a persecution complex.
 
Those statements might sound pretty outrageous, and to most of us, they are. However, did you know that according to research, at least 10 – 15% of us regularly experience these kinds of delusions?
 
Of course, we all get paranoid thoughts and feelings of persecution occasionally. It’s easy to blame outside forces when things don’t go our way. But for some people, it is a pervasive way of thinking that severely disrupts their life.
 
So what exactly is this complex?
 
What is a persecution complex?
 
This complex arises when a person falsely believes that someone is out to cause them harm. The intensity and longevity of these feelings can differ, as can the object of the paranoia.
 
For example, an employee can believe the whole office staff is against her and deliberately undermining her chances of promotion. Or an individual can think they are being persecuted by government agents who are trying to frame them for crimes they did not commit.
 
Examples of persecution complexes:
My husband is trying to poison me because he has a new lover and wants me out of the way.
  • I know the police are tapping my phones.
  • I have to go to the self-service tills because the shop assistants have been told not to serve me.
  • My neighbours are stealing my washing from the line while I’m at work.
 
In all examples, sufferers believe that either a person, group of people or an organisation is going to cause them harm.
 
Sufferers from a persecution complex will typically talk in vague terms. They will say ‘They’re out to get me’ or ‘Someone’s listening to my calls’. However, when pressed further they are unable to identify the perpetrator.
 
So where does this delusion come from and who is likely to suffer from it?
 
Where does a persecution complex come from?
 
Sufferers share three common aspects in the way they think, feel and then act. To understand this complex further we need to examine three main human behavioural processes:
  1. Emotional processing
  2. Abnormal internal events
 
1. Emotional processing
 
Studies show that those who suffer from this complex tend to think with more emotion when it comes to their social experiences. They view their interactions with others through an emotional lens, rather than a logical one.
 
As a result, sufferers get upset at everyday occurrences and react with more impulsivity. The main problem, however, with viewing everyday incidents through an emotional lens is that a sufferer will attribute greater meaning to non-events.
 
2. Abnormal internal events
 
Emotional processing is just one aspect of a persecution complex. The second is that sufferers misconstrue what is happening to them externally in the environment.
 
In order for them to rationalise what’s going on in their heads, they’ll fixate on something outside of them. For example, a person with anxiety might attribute their anxious state because they believe they are being watched.
 
Or someone who has been ill recently might believe they are being slowly poisoned. In all cases, they attribute their internal thoughts to outside events.
 
3. Reasoning biases
 
Studies have found that persecution complexes are perpetuated by cognitive biases. In other words, sufferers are likely to use biases when they think. For instance, jumping to conclusions, black and white thinking and blaming other people instead of themselves.
 
For example, someone who jumps to conclusions might view the black car that is driving up and down their road as a government spy. Those with normal reasoning might just assume the driver was lost.
 
Who is more likely to suffer?
 
As well as the above three common traits, there are other commonalities that sufferers may share.
 
Childhood trauma – Psychosis and paranoia can be linked to neglect, abuse and trauma in childhood.
 
Genetics – Delusional thinking is more common in those who already have a family member suffering from a psychosis such as schizophrenia.
 
Low self-worth – People with a low sense of self-worth, who are vulnerable to criticism and have little self-esteem are more likely to succumb to paranoid delusions.
 
Overly-critical of themselves – Research has shown that those who are overly critical of themselves can suffer from a persecution complex.
 
Worriers – Those with a persecution complex have a tendency to worry and ruminate more than the average person. They’ll also catastrophize and fantasise about implausible outcomes.
 
Over-sensitive – People with paranoid delusions can appear oversensitive to criticism from others. They are more likely to perceive a light-hearted comment as a personal attack on them.
 
Treatment of a persecution complex
 
Treating this delusion will vary according to the overriding symptoms and underlying causes.
 
For instance:
  • Learning to control the original anxiety can reduce the feelings of persecution.
  • Recognising one’s thought patterns, such as catastrophizing and black and white thinking can increase feelings of paranoia.
  • Learning to reduce time spent worrying will decrease the likelihood of a paranoid episode.
  • Addressing past trauma from childhood can lead to significant reductions in symptoms.
  • Cognitive-behavioural therapy can help sufferers reduce their negative thought patterns.
 
Final thoughts
 
Living with a persecution complex is not only surprisingly common but can be extremely debilitating. However, treatments are available and you can, with professional help, learn to manage the symptoms.
 
 
References:
  1. www.wired.com
  2. www.verywellmind.com


Janey Davies



About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 23:56
Terça-feira, 17 / 03 / 20

Outcome Bias: How It Leads You to Disaster and How to Avoid It

Outcome Bias: 

How It Leads You to Disaster and How to Avoid It

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

March 17th, 2020.

 
outcome bias.
 
 
 
Cognitive biases shape our everyday experiences and influence our decision-making. But one bias, in particular, can be extremely dangerous – the outcome bias.
 
What Is an Outcome Bias?
 
The outcome bias can make you focus on the end result and ignore the risks along the way. When we already know the outcome of a specific task, we can become blind to the dangers that might present during the process.
 
  • “When people observe successful outcomes, they tend to focus on the results more than on the (often unseen) complex processes that led to them.” Tinsley, Dillon, Madsen
 
This usually happens when we have repeated a task and achieved a good result at the end. This gives us the impression that every time we undertake this task, the results will be good.
 
But lots of things can happen during the process.
 
For example, imagine you live in an area prone to flooding. So far, in the twenty years you have lived in your house, the floodwaters have never been close to reaching your property. Do you buy flood insurance?
 
Many people would say no. The floods have not affected you for twenty years. But then the following year you see exceptional levels of rain and the river banks burst, flooding your house.
 
Studies show that if a person experiences a near-miss where they’ve escaped a potential hazard, they are less likely to take protective action. They’ll have an “I was alright last time, it will be alright again,” attitude.
 
Instead of evaluating the situation as it unfolds, they are focusing on past outcomes to inform their future decisions. But this is a rapidly changing world. So why do we feel the need to concentrate on the results, rather than the process?
 
Why do we experience it?
 
Human beings are continually trying to make sense of the world and to do this, we have to take shortcuts in our cognitive processing. We can’t evaluate every single new experience and try and decode it.
 
As a result, we learn these cognitive shortcuts. In the outcome bias, we do this by evaluating a situation against a previous one. If the previous situation had a good outcome, then we’ll chalk that up to a good decision. It’s a little like we’re using the power of retroactive hindsight when we focus on the outcome. It worked before, it will work again.
 
But is the outcome bias such a bad thing? Surely learning from past experiences is a good thing for humans?
 
Yes, it is, but the problem with the outcome bias is that we are not learning from our previous experiences. We are simply replicating them. And that’s where it gets dangerous. Because we fool ourselves into thinking that our decisions don’t matter, and they do of course.
 
Famous examples of disastrous outcome bias
 
Deepwater Horizon Oil Rig
 
In April 2010, a gas blowout safety mechanism failed on BP Gulf’s oil ring. The blowout ignited which caused the rig to sink, triggering a massive oil spill that wrecked wildlife and killed 11 people. This accident is one of the worst environmental disasters in American history.
 
But why did it happen? There had been warning signs.
 
The crew on the rig called it ‘the well from hell’ because of numerous technical problems. For a start, the main pipe that led into the well didn’t have enough centralizers in place to keep it straight. In addition, the drillers had removed the drilling mud too soon which lead to an unstable pipe.
 
The night before the blowout crew had performed a negative pressure test on the pipe to see if it was leaking oil and gas. Basically, this meant removing the heavy mud and replacing it with lighter seawater. In order to see if pressure built up the well was shut down. Pressure-build up is a sure sign that oil and gas were seeping into the well.
 
The tests showed that pressure had indeed built up, but BP managers and rig crew disagreed on the results. The test had to be repeated as no one could agree. After repeating the test now everyone agreed they had a good result and many crew members went to bed.
 
But it wasn’t a good result.
 
Over the next few hours, hundreds of barrels of oil and gas were leaking out and travelling up the pipe with increasing momentum. This roiling mass of pressure burst through the safety blowout and just kept going. Eventually, it ignited, blowing up the oil rig.
 
An ensuring investigation took years to complete, but it found a catalogue of errors that lead to this disaster. BP executives had experienced dozens of near-misses in the industry but with no major consequences.
 
However, each near-miss was down to sheer luck or circumstances, not good decision-making. For example, wind direction, or using different safety equipment. But instead of raising alarms and being carefully investigated, each near-miss was viewed that the safety procedures were working.
 
The Challenger Space Shuttle
 
Most of us can remember the horrific sight of the Challenger Space Shuttle breaking up in mid-air.
 
In January 1986, 73 seconds after it was launched, NASA’s Challenger space shuttle exploded. Seven astronauts were killed instantly, including a teacher. Broadcast live, this launch happened with millions of spectators around the world watching. So what went so drastically wrong?
 
Investigators attributed the accident to a failure of an O ring seal. This was a sealing ring that should have protected two joints in the lower parts of the rocket. The seal was designed to stop extremely hot gases from leaking from these two joints.
 
However, it broke, the gas escaped causing foam to break off an external rocket tank. This created shards of debris that pierced a hole through the wing of the space shuttle and causing it to explode.
 
Many people questioned why the launch went ahead as the initial recommendation was to cancel, due to the extreme cold temperatures on that day. However, the decision to launch was made.
 
The following investigation showed that doubts had been initially raised by the failure of the O rings on previous flights. But they were effectively ignored because their failures had never caused damage before.
 
In fact, Richard Feynman, a professor of theoretical physics and part of the investigation, stated:
 
“There were many seals that didn’t have any problem, and so it is obviously a random effect. It depends upon whether or not you get a blowhole or you don’t get a blowhole. So if within a particular flight it happens that all six seals don’t get a blowhole, that’s no information.”
 
Mars probe
 
And I can show you another example of NASA’s failure to properly investigate an anomaly in space travel which led to disaster.
 
During its 1998 journey towards Mars, the Mars Climate Orbiter kept drifting off-course. Actually, it drifted four times and each time analysts on Earth had to make small adjustments to correct it.
 
Scientists did not try to find the cause of the drifting of a $200 million spacecraft. Instead, they carried on correcting the trajectory. As it approached Mars, instead of entering into orbit, it crashed and broke up in the atmosphere.
 
NASA investigators later discovered that the programmers had mistakenly used English measurements instead of metric ones when they set the code for the journey. A mistake easily rectified, but because it wasn’t causing much concern and they could fix it during its journey, they didn’t look into the drifting.
Four ways you can avoid outcome bias
 
Of course, we’re not all in charge of expensive oil rigs or space shuttles, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be wary of outcome bias. Here are four ways to avoid it:
 
Don’t act under pressure
 
Feeling under pressure leads to hastily-made decisions where we could be tempted to rely on the outcome, rather than the procedure.
 
Don’t rely on previous experiences
 
Of course, it is natural to examine past scenarios and make judgements against those. But where near-misses are concerned we should take each case on an individual basis.
 
Look at the cause, not the result
 
Again, this is difficult but we need to see what is happening now, and not concentrate on the results of what happened before.
 
When in doubt, assume the worse
 
Just because some experience worked out before, doesn’t guarantee that it will have a favourable outcome again. Always assume the worse.
 
Final thoughts
 
Remember, just because you’ve had good results time and time again, doesn’t mean you can predict the same results this time around.
 
References:
  1. onlinelibrary.wiley.com
  2. sas.upenn.edu
  3. hbr.org


Janey Davies



About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 17:59
Quinta-feira, 12 / 03 / 20

Personality in the Workplace: 9 Most Difficult Types.

Personality in the Workplace: 

9 Most Difficult Types.

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

March 12th, 2020.

 
Personality in the Workplace.
 
 
 
Over the years, I’ve worked in a lot of different jobs. From factory floors to secretarial roles, it doesn’t seem to matter which. There’s always one personality in the workplace that gets on everyone’s nerves.
 
And that gave me an idea. There must be specific personality types in the workplace that everyone recognises and secretly despises. So let’s bring them out into the open where they belong.
 
9 Most Difficult Types of Personality in the Workplace
 
The Under-Miner
 
I remember starting work at an electrical contracting company as a secretary and the firm consisted of all men. One man, in particular, was a sneaky ‘whisper in the ear’ kind of guy that would say things to undermine my confidence.
 
It was my first time working as a secretary, so I was new to the role and didn’t know what was expected of me. This one guy would appear to offer help and advice but then add a kind of afterthought that made me doubt my decision or actions.
 
This kind of personality in the workplace is undermining you to get ahead themselves by making you look bad.
 
The Ass-Kisser
 
I’ve come across several of these in my time. The person that rushes up to the boss with a tea or coffee as soon as they walk through the door. The ones that always turn up early to work and leave late to show willing.
 
They make everyone else feel as if they aren’t doing as much as they should. This sort of personality feeds resentment in the workplace. I mean, no one likes an ass-kisser in any walk of life.
 
So why do they act this way? Because they have a need to feel special and favourite.
 
The Gossip
 
You often get cliques forming in certain workplace environments, and this is where you’ll find our third difficult workplace personality – the gossip.
 
This person loves to spread rumours and lies about people. They play colleagues off one another to cause friction. In fact, this is really a form of bullying. Gossips feel better about themselves by making others feel worse. Gossip isolates people and it’s particularly insidious in small companies.
 
The Over-Sharer
 
I once worked in a factory office and I was leaving the job and training up my replacement. She didn’t know anyone there and had only been learning the job for two days.
 
The office was open plan and had around 50 employees working there. One day, in a very loud voice, she informed me that this was her first real fulltime position after she had miscarried her baby.
 
This came out of nowhere. It was loud enough for everyone close by to hear. I didn’t really know her that well, but she proceeded to go into quite revealing details about the miscarriage and the treatment in hospital. The over-sharer wants everyone to know their most intimate private details.
 
The Perfectionist
 
Have you ever had to stay late because your team leader wants just ‘one more draft’ before you go? This is the work of the perfectionist, and she or he can keep us at work for hours. Nothing is ever finished, nothing is ever good enough. You can deliver the most perfect content and it will come back with suggestions or edits.
 
The problem with this personality is that they are probably not just like this in the workplace. They are more than likely to be perfectionists at home too. So it’s not something they do to get at colleagues, it’s in their nature.
 
The Depressive
 
Whatever you say to the depressive, it will never work and it won’t succeed. The depressive is the one with a negative attitude toward everything.
 
The thing is, they never have a suggestion for what might work. They just need to tell you that your idea won’t work. And it doesn’t matter how many different solutions you put to them, none will get through. Their only role in life is to put down everything everyone suggests and bring us all down to their depressive level.
 
The Critic
 
On the other hand, we have the critic. Now, you might think the depressive and the critic are the same, but they’re not.
 
The critic will take great delight in criticising your work or your ideas. They get their energy from contradicting what you say. They are even known to make up bogus facts and figures to make their argument seem valid.
 
To them, this is a fight, a battle, a duel to the end. There can only be one winner and they’ll do everything in their power to win. These are the kind of people that argue black is white.
 
The Slacker
 
We all know someone who doesn’t pull their fair share of work. Actually, when I was younger it was me! I worked in a reject kitchen shop and was responsible for the packing up of orders. In the warehouse, boxes were stored at the back. Because most of the stuff we sold was jumpers and knitted accessories, the boxes were very soft.
 
You could make a nice little nest from these boxes where you would be hidden from the main part of the warehouse. My friend and I would take it in turns to have little afternoon naps for half an hour while the other would keep an eye out for the boss. Hey, I was 17!
 
The Weirdo
 
I’ve also worked with some weirdos in my time. One stands out in particular. This is another office tale. We had a smoking room in the days where you were allowed to smoke indoors and there was one guy who used the smoking room that everyone else avoided talking to.
 
I was told some rumours and gossip about him but decided to make up my own mind. Anyone, we got talking and sort of became friends over time. Then one day he said, “I’ve told my friend I’ve met someone.” I said that I thought that was great, and he looked puzzled and said ‘It’s you’.
 
I was a bit worried then he started sending me emails, asking me out, turning up at my flat, coming into work drunk and finally threatening me. In the end, because the company didn’t do anything, I left.
 
Final thoughts
 
Can you identify with any of these difficult personality types in the workplace or do you know any I haven’t covered? Let me know!
 
 
References:

  1. inc.com
  2. imgur.com


Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


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publicado por achama às 18:20
Terça-feira, 10 / 03 / 20

How Safety Bias Tricks Socially Anxious People into Toxic Avoidance.

How Safety Bias Tricks Socially Anxious People into Toxic Avoidance.

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

March 9th, 2020.

 
safety bias social anxiety.
 

 
 
People with social anxiety are often told to face their fears. That gradual exposure to social situations will improve their anxiety. But research suggests those that do not improve are using safety bias tricks without realising. So what are these tricks and how do they lead to avoidance?
 
What Are Safety Bias Behaviours?
 
Socially anxious people fear social situations for a number of reasons. Some may feel trapped, others suffer from cripplingly low self-esteem, and some simply have anxiety attacks in social settings.
 
With all types of anxiety disorders, the treatment suggested is a gradual exposure to the fear-producing situation. The premise is to introduce the person very gradually to situations that cause slight anxiety. Once the person learns to stay in the situation and manage the fear, they can move onto a higher level of anxiety.
 
The idea is that by staying in the fear-producing setting, the person learns that nothing untoward happens and eventually the fear subsides. By the end, the person has overcome their social phobia.
 
This is all well and good. But as someone with a phobia will tell you, it’s never that simple. And researchers have found that socially anxious people are using safety bias tricks to avoid social situations. So let’s get down to it; what are these behaviors?
 
12 Safety Bias Tricks People with Social Anxiety Use
 
Safety bias makes a person undertake certain behaviours during a social setting which are designed to make them feel better, or safe, but in fact, don’t.
 
Some examples include:
  1. Always getting the end seat in a cinema so you can leave quickly if you feel anxious during the film showing.
  2. Standing at the back of the meeting room so you can escape if needed.
  3. Ordering only drinks at lunch so you can leave quickly if you feel panicky.
  4. Talking quickly, speeding up your speech without pausing.
  5. Avoiding eye contact so that you won’t have to talk to people.
  6. Wearing boring and bland clothing so that you don’t attract attraction to yourself.
  7. Drinking or taking drugs to steady your nerves before the event.
  8. Avoiding substances such as caffeine that you know increases your adrenalin and makes you blush or sweat.
  9. Pretending you didn’t see someone or that you are not interested in the conversation so you don’t have to participate.
  10. Asking a lot of questions to take the attention off yourself.
  11. Taking on roles within a group with the least interaction with others, e.g. setting up equipment or handing out paperwork.
  12. Walking with your head down or your hands in your pockets to avoid interaction with others.
 
Now we all have behaviours that we repeat to make ourselves feel calmer and more confident. For example, wearing makeup, putting on flattering clothes, even drinking and smoking help us to a certain extent.
 
And you might think that there isn’t really a problem with a person using these kinds of tricks if they make them feel safer. But research shows that safety bias behaviours actually hinder a socially anxious person’s ability to overcome their fear.
 
To put this into context, I want to show you some extreme forms of safety bias behaviours.
 
Extreme Forms of Safety Behaviours
 
  • An agoraphobic might remove themselves entirely from society and stay indoors to keep themselves safe.
  • A person with OCD might wash their hands over 100 times to keep themselves safe.
  • A man who fears to have a stroke might move around slowly so he keeps himself safe from injury.
  • A CEO with a fear of public speaking might feign illness on the day she is due to give a speech to keep herself safe.
  • A person with a fear of vomiting might stop eating to keep themselves safe.
 
These are all extreme versions of our socially-anxious sufferers, but you can see that by using safety behaviours, you are actually making the problem worse, not better.
 
Why Safety Bias Behaviours Don’t Work
 
The problem is that these safety behaviours have immediate relief in the short term. If you don’t have to face the most frightening thing in your life, it can be incredibly relieving and feel really good. Not only that, but this good feeling reinforces that what you are doing must be right. But it only works short-term.
 
In the long-term, it is very damaging. This is because when you engage in safety bias behaviours, you are focusing on your anxiety and your fears. These are at the forefront of your mind at all times. You are constantly examining what’s happening and then reacting to these perceived threats. And don’t forget, that’s all they are – perceived, they are not real.
 
The problem is that after a while, you become accustomed to feeling like this in social situations. It’s all you know. And then it becomes a vicious circle of negative fear and reaction. You use your safety behaviours and gradually withdraw from society. And although in the short-term, you might feel relieved, you don’t feel better in the long-term.
 
So what would benefit socially-anxious sufferers instead of safety bias tricks? That old treatment of confronting your fears is true. But you have to do it properly. You have to learn that social situations are not threatening and that there are other ways of coping, without using maladaptive ways.
 
Healthy Ways of Coping with Social Stress
 
So what are these adaptive ways of coping with social stress?
Breathing exercises and relaxing techniques.
 
Learning to breathe slowly and reduce your heart rate are key to decreasing your panic levels.
 
Talking to yourself in the third person.
 
Studies show that by talking to yourself in the third person instead of ‘I’m going to panic’ saying ‘She’s going to panic’ takes the edge off and allows you to be objective.
 
Understand that if you are ill, people are kind.
 
I always had a fear of fainting in public which affected me going out. Then I saw someone faint and everyone was so kind and caring.
Being prepared for your work.
 
You can’t go wrong if you have prepared the life out of your project. Know it inside and out and you won’t feel anxious talking about it on the day.
Live in the moment.
 
There’s a lot of talk these days about living in the moment and not letting life pass you by. You can use this mantra to reduce panic by remembering this moment will pass and tonight you’ll be safe in your bed
.
Final thoughts
 
It’s tempting to use safety bias tricks to help us get through tough times, but they don’t work, they just waste time, so why not learn some useful ways of coping instead. In fact, check out our CBT page for helpful tips.

References:
  1. www.cambridge.org
  2. www.researchgate.net
  3. unsworks.unsw.edu.au

Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 08:24
Domingo, 23 / 02 / 20

5 Signs of Blame Shifting and How to Deal with It.

 

5 Signs of Blame Shifting and How to Deal with It.

Sherrie Hurd.

learning-mind.com

Posted February 23rd, 2020.

 
 

 
 
One of the things I despise the most is someone who can never take responsibility for their actions. Blame shifting is their second nature.
 
I hate to admit that I’m way too familiar with blame-shifting. For years of my life, I thought everything was my fault, even when obviously it wasn’t – it was complete with evidence in my favor. Did that evidence ever make the blame shifter stop in their tracks?
 
Nope. That’s because a blame shifter is good at what they do, and they will do it as long as they can get away with it.
 
Blame shifting is insidious
 
The biggest issue with blame-shifting is that it can greatly damage a healthy person’s self-esteem. This heinous act will leave you questioning facts about your life and about your character as well. Shifting the blame onto someone else can be dangerous and completely destroy lives.
 
I know all this sounds like an exaggeration, but unfortunately, it’s not. Many otherwise mentally healthy individuals have been hurt so badly that they constantly question their self-worth. Do you know what we need to do? We need to see blame shifters before they get to us.
 
Recognizing the storm before it hits
 
1. The apology with strings attached
 
If by chance, you get the blame shifter to apologize at all, which hardly ever happens, they will use the “I’m sorry, but…” tactic. What I mean by this is that they will apologize, but they have to add some sort of defensive mechanism to the apology.
 
Whether they are about to put some of the blame on you or make an excuse for their behavior, you will recognize them by their inability to apologize without the added “but”, which totally eliminates the sincerity of the responsibility. What they are doing is finding a crack to slip out from under what they’ve done wrong.
 
2. Because of this, and because of that
 
Shifting the blame can be as easy as using cause and effect. While cause and effect do exist, responsibility is the main concern. Listen to this small interaction to understand:
 
Real victim: “You really hurt my feelings when you yelled at me.”
 
Blame shifter: “Well, if you would stop complaining about the same thing over and over, I wouldn’t.”
 
There are two ways that the blame shifter is really in the wrong. First of all, they shouldn’t be continuing behavior that makes someone else constantly complain. Most people complain when something bothers them, and they want to communicate.
 
Blame shifters don’t usually communicate, and so the problem gets ignored. After much complaining, they use verbal abuse as a scare tactic. There are many other situations like this where toxic people use the cause and effect technique to excuse any blame placed on themselves.
 
3. No communication
 
Blame shifting always comes with the inability to communicate. While these people can talk about problems on the surface level, when they are proven wrong, they clam up. They have no excuses or reasons for their behavior. They may even outright lie.
 
Then, ultimately, they will say there’s no reason to discuss the issue anymore. This is so damaging because it leaves the issues hanging and they’re never resolved. Then this causes bitterness to set in. Many marriages have failed due to the lack of healthy and honest communication. And most of the time, you will recognize the blame shifter by their communication aversion.
 
4. The pity party
 
You will also know you have yourself a blame shifter when they start telling you stories about their troubled childhood and how it makes them the way they are. While many people really did have a bad childhood, the toxic person will tell this story and exaggerate it to keep from taking the blame for present issues or mistakes.
 
It’s also okay to talk about past issues and how they’ve made you do things, but you cannot use this excuse for every mistake you make. If you cannot take the blame for doing something now, you will always be a child. Watch out for the pity party.
5. Flipping the script
 
This is an old term, but it fits so perfectly with a tactic that the blame shifter uses. When they’ve been caught red-handed, their first response is shock, their second response is to find the quickest way to turn the incident over onto you… using you as the villain.
 
Now, I know what you must be thinking, “How could someone caught in the act make the victim look bad?”
 
Well, they use carefully calculated manipulation. For example, let’s say you went to see your husband at work and he wasn’t there, and so, when he arrived home at the usual time, you asked him about it.
 
Now, some people will lie and say they had to leave for this or that reason, but if the blame shifter wants, he can turn the attention to you. He might say, “Why were you stalking my workplace?”, “What is wrong with you?”, oh, and my favorite, “You still don’t trust me, do you?” and then proceed to make an excuse for where he was, then stay mad for several days.
 
The blame for the whole confrontation is now your fault. You should have minded your own business and stayed at home.
 
How do we deal with these people?
 
Well, I hope you never have to endure such people because they have serious issues with themselves. Never ever believe that these things are your fault. Anyone who cannot take logical blame for their imperfections has a problem that can only be fixed by them or by professional help.
 
If you happen to be in a marriage with someone like this or stuck in a situation you cannot get out of at the moment, you will have to find various ways to living with this issue, and it’s a difficult one.
 
Honestly, it’s almost impossible to confront someone like this without being verbally abused or taking their blame on yourself. This will make you unhealthy, both mentally and physically over time.
 
Your best outcome would be if your loved one came to you for help and genuinely wanted to change. Believe it or not, some people eventually see what they’ve become. In this case, it’s worth sticking around. If there is no desire to change, then the choice is yours.
 
Just remember, none of this nonsense is about you, and sometimes it’s best to walk away than to get into arguments with toxic people because you will never win. If this applies to you, I hope everything works out for the best.

 

Sherrie Hurd



Image credit: Stephen Hawking is giving a lecture for NASA’s 50th anniversary/NASA

 

 

Copyright © 2012-2020 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us. 

 

 

 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:
 

 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 22:27
Domingo, 09 / 02 / 20

Spiral of Silence Theory Explains Why You’d Rather Stay Quiet.

Spiral of Silence Theory Explains Why You’d Rather Stay Quiet.

Lottie Miles.

learning-mind.com

Posted February 8th, 2020.

 
spiral of silence theory.

 


 
 
 
During the 1970s, Elizabeth Noelle-Neumann, a German political scientist, developed the spiral of silence theory. Working in the context of post-World War Two Germany, Noelle-Neumann coined the theory. She sought to explain why individuals choose to remain silent when they believe their view isn’t held by the majority.
 
In this post, we look at how the spiral of silence can explain human behavior. We will also consider whether or not the theory is still relevant today.
 
Spiral of silence theory explained
 
The theory was coined by Elizabeth Noelle-Neumann in 1974. It was partly designed in an attempt to explain the lack of resistance to the Nazi regime. The idea of the spiral of silence suggests that people remain silent when they think their views are different from majority viewpoints.
 
According to the theory, this unwillingness to speak out is due to fear of social isolation. It is also due to the expected negative consequences of going against the perceived status quo. On the other hand, those confident their beliefs and opinions meet ‘public opinion’ can voice their thoughts without fear. This also perpetuates the silencing effect on those in the minority.
 
We are all able to determine what the prevailing ‘public opinion’ actually is, according to the theory. In Noelle-Neumann’s words, we all have a ‘quasi statistical sense’ of whether our own opinions are either popular or unpopular. This is based on the cues we have had from the mass media and our environment. In other words, we have a ‘sixth sense’ of the popular public consensus on a range of issues.
 
The spiral effect begins to occur as those who feel validated about their beliefs become more and more vocal. Concurrently, those in the minority lose confidence in expressing their opinions. This loss of confidence is built on the fear of rejection and subsequent social isolation.
 
As a result, the minority are silenced. In this way, predominating public opinion is seen as a form of social control in the spiral of silence theory.
 
Research into the theory
 
Since the theory of the spiral of silence was developed, there have been numerous studies that have tested it. These studies have sought to either prove or disprove its legitimacy. The majority of these studies have focused on the effect of the theory in political environments.
 
Most recently, a meta-analysis conducted by Matthes et al (2017) revisited the theory and the effect of the spiral of silence on either restricting or enabling the expression of political opinions. They analyzed 66 studies exploring this topic which collectively contained 27,000 participants.
 
The analysis found that there was a significant positive relationship between one’s perception of the prevailing opinion and the subsequent suppression of their own opinions. This was seen to be particularly acute when amongst family, friends, and neighbors.
 
Despite this result, there are critics of the theory. Some have criticized the assumption that we all have an in-built understanding of what the prevailing climate of opinion is, and whether there can actually be something that can be defined as such.
 
Others have questioned the theoretical underpinning that fear of isolation is a strong enough deterrent for silencing a minority opinion. There have also been criticisms of the theory’s failure to take into account cross-cultural differences. Others have noted that the nature of the issue itself can impact on the spiral of silence effect.
 
How relevant is the spiral of silence today?
 
With the rise of alternative online media channels and social media, critics of the spiral of silence are suggesting that the theory is no longer relevant. The theory was proposed pre-internet and was based on a mass-media that was relatively uniform.
 
Today, the mainstream media often follows the same trajectory. However, the internet has provided people the opportunity to seek alternative opinions. It has also given voice to those who have previously been disadvantaged by unequal power relations.
 
If an individual does not wish to publicly express their opinion amongst friends, family, or colleagues they may well do so anonymously via the internet. This is sometimes known as the online disinhibition effect. This itself creates its own spiral effect.
 
However, within this context, a minority opinion may no longer be felt as such. This is due to the fact that the World Wide Web enables the participation of many within the political domain.
 
The birth of the internet, therefore, has shifted the conversation around the spiral of silence into a new trajectory. While some believe the theory has had its day, others still see the theoretical concept as a useful means of exploring behavior.
 
Using it as a starting point for many studies into whether a climate of opinion can still be said to exist, and how this affects our willingness to speak out about controversial opinions that we deem to go against the grain.
Does it ring true for you?
 
The spiral of silence, therefore, may have struck a chord with your own behavior and responses. Ever felt silenced during a political conversation? Fear of isolation or rejection is certainly something we can all relate to.
 
So, while the spiral of silence theory may need some modern re-jigging, as a concept, it can certainly serve to explain those occasions where we ponder about what we could have said, only when it is too late to say it.
 
 

Lottie Miles

 






 
About the Author: Lottie Miles


 
Lottie Miles is a professional researcher and writer with a passion for human rights. She has 4 years of experience working within the NGO sector and has a Masters Degree in Social Policy. She has a keen interest in exploring ways in which happiness habits can help to improve mental health and wellbeing. In her spare time, she likes doing crossword puzzles, painting and traveling.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 03:25
Domingo, 02 / 02 / 20

Online Disinhibition Effect Explains Why Some People Become Jerks Online

Online Disinhibition Effect Explains Why Some People Become Jerks Online

Lottie Miles.

learning-mind.com

Posted February 1st, 2020.

 
Online Disinhibition Effect.

 

 
Trolling others is a common refrain for people online. Indeed, this behavior has become so common that it is now intensively studied by psychologists. Psychologists call this behavior the ‘online disinhibition effect’. But what is it that makes people behave this way? Who are internet trolls? Are some people more likely to act like jerks online or is it something intrinsic to the internet that makes this happen?
 
In this post, we will explore the answers to these questions by exploring 5 of the fundamental factors causing people to be jerks on the internet.
 
Understanding the online disinhibition effect
 
Dissociative Anonymity
 
One thing people quickly learn as they peruse the internet is that people you engage with cannot tell who you are. Whilst the technically savvy could probably detect them easily with some computer wizardry, most people only see what you choose to display. Dissociative anonymity (and the online disinhibition effect) stems from the feelings generated from this ability to become ‘anonymous’. These feelings result in people losing their inhibitions.
 
The disinhibiting effects of dissociative anonymity can help people to open up. They know what they say or do won’t be linked back to them in their daily lives after all. However, whilst online disinhibition can be benign, it can also be toxic.
 
Indeed, the history of trolling shows this. People can be encouraged to be more deviant, rude, and racist. In fact, online jerks will say all the socially inappropriate things they can think of due to the lack of consequences.
 
Being invisible
 
The effects of dissociative anonymity are accentuated by the sense of invisibility online. We’re all guilty of a bit of online creeping at times. Be it to check out a potential love interest, or seeing what friends have been up to. The sense of invisibility enables us to do this. This leads to people doing things and visiting places online that they wouldn’t dream of in the real world.
 
The effects of invisibility in reducing inhibitions have long been known in Psychology. Indeed, psychoanalysts commonly use this technique so patients cannot see their body language and facial expressions.
 
By doing this, patients feel less inhibited and freer to say what they feel. With online text communication online, this sense of invisibility is enhanced. This enables internet trolls to separate their harsh words from the receiver’s response.
 
Perceived majority positioning
 
When people see themselves as holding the majority position, they are more likely to express their true opinion. Conversely, if they fear their opinion is in the minority, they may fear being ostracised. This phenomenon is known as the spiral of silence theory developed in the 1960s and 1970s by Elisabeth-Noelle Neuman. The theory seeks to describe how public opinion is formed and how certain behaviors are acceptable in public or in different spaces.
 
This theory also explains why people may act differently on the internet to in public. For example, whilst in the office, they may not make sexist or racist comments due to the fear of social isolation as a result.
 
However, online they may feel these views are widespread and in the majority, making them more likely to express them. Combined with a sense of anonymity and invisibility, the perceived majority status can entrench the online disinhibition effect.
 
Personality traits
 
Clearly, the functionality of the internet explains why some people behave in a disrespectful way online. However, personality traits are also likely to be a key component. Indeed, one study entitled ‘Trolls just want to have fun’ found that online trolls are more likely to be horrible people in real life.
 
Specifically, they wanted to see whether trolls were linked with the darkest personality traits of narcissism, Machiavellianism, psychopathy, and sadism. They carried out a survey of 1,200 people. This survey found that people ranking trolling as their top pastime on the internet were more likely to score highly for dark personality traits. In particular, trolls were linked with traits associated with sadism in the real world.
 
Unfortunately, sadistic tendencies can actually be pretty common. Combined with the online disinhibition effect, the right personality traits can turn people into unparalleled online jerks.
 
A spiral of negativity
 
Although some studies show that the online disinhibition effect is linked to sadism others have shown that anyone can be a jerk online. For example, a study for Stanford and Cornell Universities found that trolling may be influenced by situational factors at least as much as the innate traits of people. This study found that the person’s mood and the tone of comments already on posts can lead to a spiral of negativity that causes trolling.
 
They tested this by giving a sample of 667 people an easy or difficult test. Participants were then asked to read the same article and comment underneath. However, underneath the article, people saw either neutral comments or troll-like comments. The study found that 68% of those given the harder test alongside the article with comments by trolls wrote troll-like comments themselves. Even for the easy test plus inoffensive comments group, this figure still stood at 35%.
 
So do some people become jerks online because of the internet or because they are jerks in real life? Well, the online disinhibition effect explains that psychological factors, personality traits, and the functionality of the internet are all to blame for this type of behavior.
 
 

Lottie Miles

 






 
About the Author: Lottie Miles


 
Lottie Miles is a professional researcher and writer with a passion for human rights. She has 4 years of experience working within the NGO sector and has a Masters Degree in Social Policy. She has a keen interest in exploring ways in which happiness habits can help to improve mental health and wellbeing. In her spare time, she likes doing crossword puzzles, painting and traveling.
 
Copyright © 2012-2019 Learning Mind. All rights reserved. For permission to reprint, contact us.
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 
 
Archives:

 

 
and https://www.facebook.com/mel.tavares.75


A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com
 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


 

 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
Free counters!

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publicado por achama às 03:00
A Luz está a revelar a Verdade, e esta libertar-nos-á! -Só é real o AMOR Incondicional. -Quando o Amor superar o amor pelo poder, o mundo conhecerá a Paz; Jimi Hendrix. -Somos almas a ter uma experiência humana!

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