Lottie Miles.


Posted November 4th, 2019.



Life comes with its ups and downs and navigating our way through these is not always easy. One of the key factors which can affect our well-being and sense of self-worth is having a toxic person in our lives. But what exactly is a toxic person? More to the point, what should you do if you have one in your life? In this post, we explore how to deal with toxic people in a smart way.
Who Are Toxic People?
Anyone can be moody or alter their behavior due to circumstances going on in their life. However, a toxic person is one of the following:
Unfortunately, it is likely that you will have come across such a person either in your personal or professional life (or both).
Knowing how to deal with toxic people can go a long way in managing these relationships in your life. In this post, we take a look at some techniques used by emotionally intelligent people when faced with toxic people. You can draw on these techniques the next time you encounter a toxic person.
How Smart People Deal with Toxic People
Do not justify their behavior
The behavior of a toxic person towards yourself is unjustifiable. However, it can be easy to make excuses for someone. Especially if perhaps they are going through some hardship in their life.
We can all relate to a certain level of moodiness or snappiness. Still, if someone is being actively nasty to you this is unacceptable. Excusing a toxic person’s behavior only causes you to doubt yourself. Moreover, it is likely to have a detrimental effect on your well-being.
Distance yourself from that person
A person who takes pleasure from making you feel bad is not a person that deserves your time and attention. Ask yourself, does this ring true for any of your personal relationships? If so, then it might be time to distance yourself from this toxic person. Understandably, this is easier said than done.
At the same time, think about the effect this person is having on your well-being. To say nothing of how you would feel if you no longer had to deal with their behavior towards you.
Ultimately, there are different ways to deal with a toxic person. For certain people, the right decision may be to cut them out altogether. This is if circumstances allow it and the time is right for you.
Establish boundaries
For others, cutting a toxic person out of their life is not a realistic solution. In this instance, establishing some boundaries might be the way forward. Make the toxic person aware of the impact of their actions and behavior. While this is no easy task, it may help them to realize that you are no pushover.
Establishing boundaries is also about putting yourself in control. You decide when and where you will encounter the person. You can ensure there is a time limit on these occasions. This will help you to prepare mentally for this meeting and put you in the driving seat.
Plan your reaction
This brings us to the next method of dealing with toxic people. Once you have established boundaries, you will be able to prepare how you will react for whatever the person in question has to throw at you.
If you know that they are partial to criticize you for a particular aspect of your life, or they have a particular method of upsetting you then prepare how you will respond to this in advance.
Whether it be practising relaxation techniques or preparing your response word for word, it will put you in better control of the situation.
Get support
Perhaps the most important piece of advice when it comes to dealing with some really toxic people is to get support from those who are positive forces in your life. Whether it be at work or in your personal life.
Identifying those individuals that bring you strength will help to build your barriers up against the person who is challenging you with their toxicity.
Not only this, it is helpful to draw on support around you to get a different perspective on the issue. Here you can gain useful advice and insights to help you deal with those toxic people in your life.
Value yourself
Finally, another important way to deal with toxic people is to recognize your own value. Through acknowledging your own self-worth and owning it you can build your resistance to whatever toxicity is thrown at you.
Taking their comments and insults with a grain of salt will reduce the impact that a toxic person has on you. Allowing you to elevate your inner worth above anything that they have to say.
Final Thoughts
Learning how to deal with toxic people is, unfortunately, a skill that we can all benefit from. Recognizing those that bring toxicity to our lives and putting measures in place to reduce the negative impact that has on us is essential for our well-being.
Make sure you are aware of the toxic people around you. More importantly, seek professional support immediately for any behavior that goes beyond toxicity to abuse.
Lottie Miles

About the Author: Lottie Miles

Lottie Miles is a professional researcher and writer with a passion for human rights. She has 4 years of experience working within the NGO sector and has a Masters Degree in Social Policy. She has a keen interest in exploring ways in which happiness habits can help to improve mental health and wellbeing. In her spare time, she likes doing crossword puzzles, painting and traveling.
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