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Segunda-feira, 13 / 01 / 20

6 Mentalism Tricks That Will Allow You to Read People’s Minds

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

January 7th, 2020.

 
Mentalism Tricks.
 


 
Mentalism is everywhere in our lives. Fictional characters such as Sherlock Holmesuse mentalism tricks to solve clues. Not to mention the highly successful US TV show – The Mentalist is based around this phenomenon. In addition, UK performer Derren Brown has made a career from using mentalism and performing tricks in his shows. So, what exactly is this technique and how do people use it?
 
A Personal Experience of Mentalism Tricks
 
I went to a Derren Brown show a couple of years ago. Derren picked members of the audience to participate in the show by throwing a frisbee. I managed to catch it.
 
 
My job was to choose a number from 100 to 200. I randomly picked a number which I wrote down and placed in an envelope. This number was integral of a series of other answers given by audience members who had also been randomly selected throughout the show.
 
To this day, I have no idea how he managed to guess all our answers. The weird thing is that they all related to one another in some way. Moreover, if he had got just one answer wrong, they all would have been wrong.
 
So what exactly are mentalism tricks? A mentalist, such as Derren Brown, will use a variety of ways to read you.
 
6 Different Tricks of Mentalism
  1. Studying body language
  2. Subconscious communication
  3. Simple trickery
  4. Understanding human behaviour
  5. Cold reading
  6. Power of suggestion
 
Let’s examine each method in turn and discover the tricks of mentalism:
 
Studying Body Language
 
A mentalist’s greatest strength is his or her ability to understand body language. Gifted mentalists will use this to supposedly read people’s minds. In other words – telepathy.
 
Actually, if you break down the word telepathy, you get ‘tele’, which means distant, and ‘pathy’, which means perception or feeling. This is exactly what a mentalist does to read your mind. They get a feeling from a distance and using their knowledge of body language to interpret this feeling.
 
When reading someone’s body language, the first thing a mentalist will do is establish a person’s base level. So they may start with fairly innocuous questions to gauge a normal reaction. For example, a person might have a habit of playing with their hair. If you didn’t know this was normal behaviour, you might assume they were hiding something later on in the questioning process.
 
Remember that mentalists take years to perfect their observations on body language. However, the main areas they’ll focus on are the face and hands.
 
 
On the face, they will look at movement around the mouth when talking. Does the person push their lips out when speaking? This is a sign they are forcing their words out and might not believe what they are saying. Likewise, do they cover their mouth while speaking?
 
This is an indicator of lying.
 
What is their blink rate like? Look out for the ‘blink sandwich’. This is a fast succession of blinks before a lie, no blinks during the lie, then another burst of fast blinks. This happens because the person lying will often stare at their accuser to make their lie seem more truthful.
 
However, their eyes cannot keep up the pretence and need to blink. Hence the rapid blinks either side.
Subconscious communication
 
Are you the sort of person that always seems to receive great customer service? Or is it the opposite? Would you be surprised to learn that either way it might be your subconscious communications that are influencing others and predicting these outcomes?
 
Imagine two scenarios:
In the first, you are late for work and rush into a coffee shop. You are flustered and unkempt and when it is your turn to be served, you bark ‘coffee’ at the server without looking up.
In the second scene, you have a day off and are meeting friends. You stroll in, walk up to the counter, smile at the server and ask for coffee.
 
These two scenes are practically identical but for a slight tweak in attitude. But it is your subconscious communication that is speaking clearly here. What kind of service do you suppose you would receive for each scenario?
 
Remember, if it is so easy for novices like ourselves to understand, imagine how a mentalist could use it to read a person?
 
Simple Trickery
 
Most of us would like to believe that we wouldn’t be fooled by magic tricks, especially the really easy ones. But some of the best are the simple tricks. If you like programmes such as Perception with US actor Eric McCormack as Dr Daniel Pierce, you’ll be used to seeing mentalism tricks such as these.
 
For instance, in one episode, Dr Pierce ‘demonstrates’ his mind-reading abilities. He consistently guesses correctly from a deck of cards the right symbol his colleague is thinking of. His colleague is amazed until Dr Pierce reveals that he can see the cards his colleague is holding in the reflection of the colleague’s glasses.
 
Understanding Human Behaviour
 
I had gone to a psychic fair held locally and had managed to book the last sitting with a popular clairvoyant.
 
Just as she began my reading, a lady walked up and sadly said ‘Is it too late to book?’ The clairvoyant said ‘Yes, I’m sorry, this is my last sitting,’ gesturing to me. The lady was about to turn away and the clairvoyant stood up, grabbed her hand and said ‘It will be alright you know, you’ve suffered a terrible tragedy, but they are in a better place now.’
 
The lady broke down and said ‘Thank you’ and went on her way. I wondered afterwards, how did she know? But of course, this clairvoyant had been in the business for decades. I’m not taking anything away from her. She was an extremely kind lady to get up and offer the woman some solace.
 
Having said that, did she have clairvoyant skills or did she simply understand that this lady needed some kind of closure?
 
Cold Reading
 
This is a particularly pernicious way of using mentalism tricks to get people to open up about themselves. You could relate it back to the previous story in fact.
 
 
Cold reading is when the reader has no clue at all about their audience. So they throw out random or general facts that could apply to almost anyone. It’s a little like your horoscopes. They are fishing for a bite. Once someone has bitten they can trawl them in with vague questions until they hit on the jackpot.
 
Cold reading uses a number of techniques to help them. They will use information about certain groups of people in order to pigeon-hole people. For example, young girls are likely to have problems with self-esteem. They’ll employ certain tactics such as ‘Barnum statements’ like ‘You feel anxious meeting new people’ or ‘When you try hard you succeed in whatever you do.’
 
Fishing is an example of a specific statement like ‘I can see a car accident here is significant’. Then, if this is picked up the audience will be impressed. If it is not the mentalist will quickly move on.
 
Power of Suggestion
 
Finally, the last but probably most important of our tricks involving mentalism is the power of suggestion. This is because it can be used in so many ways to manipulate us, and not just by performers. One person, Jay Olsen, found that his hobby of magic and illusion helped his career in psychology.
 
 
“Lots of what they said about attention and memory were just what magicians had been saying in a different way.” Jay Olson at McGill University in Quebec, Canada
 
Olsen devised a simple experiment in which he flicked through a deck of cards, then asked an audience member to choose one. When the card was revealed, Olsen took out the exact card from his jacket pocket.
 
So what was the mentalism trick he used? Olsen says that whilst shuffling through the pack, he lingered for a couple of milliseconds longer on the chosen card. This was enough for participants to choose it.
 
 
This easy manipulation technique has far-reaching implications, as Olsen is keen to point out. It even works on restaurant menus. Olsen says that we are more likely to choose from the very top or bottom of the menu. This is because these areas immediately attract our eyes.
 
So, while we think we might fancy the steak, really it’s just because it’s there at the top.
Final Thoughts
 
Mentalism tricks show just how easy it is for people to read our minds. But don’t forget, if they can read ours, we can use these same techniques and read theirs!
 
References:

 

 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:

 


 
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Alternative to Google
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Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com
 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 16:16
Terça-feira, 07 / 01 / 20

I Had an Emotionally Unavailable Mother and Here’s What It Felt Like

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

January 7th, 2020.

 
EMOTIONALLY UNAVAILABLE MOTHER.
 

 
 
Want to know what it feels like to be raised by an emotionally unavailable mother? Let me tell you my story.
 
Whenever someone asks me about my mother, I say ‘She died when I was young’. When they reply that they are so sorry, I always say ‘It doesn’t matter, she was an evil cow and I didn’t love her anyway. Most people are shocked.
 
Are you? If you are – why? You didn’t know her. You didn’t know what she was like. What it was like growing up with her. And before you say ‘Well yes that’s all very well, but she was your mother’, so what? Tell me what law or unwritten rule stipulates that I have to love my mother? There is none.
 
You might think it is disrespectful to talk the way I do. But those among you who have experienced an emotionally unavailable mother will understand my point of view. And believe me when I tell you that I tried my very hardest to love her.
 
What Is an Emotionally Unavailable Mother?
 
‘Emotionally unavailable mother’ to me is just a fancy psychological way of saying cold-hearted and unfeeling. But what is the difference between a mother who struggles sometimes to show her love and one that is emotionally unavailable? I can only tell you my story and it may appear cold and matter-of-fact.
 
But what if your mother never cuddled you or told you she loved you? Or actually even spoke to you that much? What if your mother used you as a means to earn money and her own personal housekeeper? How would you feel if she was abusive to your siblings and cold towards you? Perhaps then you might understand a little of how I feel.
 
So let me tell you a few stories about dear old mum. Maybe you’ll get where I’m coming from. Or perhaps you’ll think I’m being a total snowflake and I should just get over myself and stop blaming her for everything.
 
What It Feels Like to Have an Emotionally Unavailable Mother
 
No loving touch
 
I remember being very little, probably around 4 or 5 and craving my mother’s touch. She never touched me ever. Not a hug, a cuddle, nothing.
 
But she did do one thing and that was to come into my and my sisters’ bedrooms after a night out drinking and check we were all in bed. If our bedsheets were tangled, she would straighten them out.
 
This was an opportunity for me to receive a touch from my mother as sometimes if my arm was hanging out of the bed, she would put it back under the sheets. Imagine being this starved of a mother’s touch that you engineer a scenario where she might come into contact with you? And at that young age?
 
No response
 
Again, when I was young, I could write so I guess I was around the age of 5-6, I would leave little notes to my mother. The notes would say things like ‘I love you so much mum’ and ‘You are the best mum in the world’.
 
I would leave these love notes to my mother on her pillow on her bed so she would see them before she went to sleep. She never mentioned them. I would excitably go to bed and look under my pillow to see what she had left for me. After a few weeks, I stopped writing them.
 
Ignored wishes
 
I passed my 12+ which meant I could go to a local grammar school. There were two choices; an all-girls one which had a very posh reputation (not me at all, we lived on a council estate) or a local mixed grammar where all my friends were going.
 
Mother decided I was to attend the all-girls school. Despite my protests, she told me ‘It would look better on my CV later’ when I applied for jobs. Ironically, I wasn’t allowed to carry on and study for A-Levels. I had to work at the factory job she had found for me when I was 16 to help pay the household bills.
 
Can’t confide with your mother
 
I had a very bad time at grammar school. I didn’t know anyone. There were cliques of girls who had known one another from middle school and were quite happy to stay in their own little groups.
 
It got so bad that I ran away twice and went home. Each time my mother took me back to the school, no questions asked. The school did try to help but as far as mother was concerned I was to ‘get on with it’. I contemplated ending it all but got through it.
 
Some years later, mother and I were arguing and she had said she’d always done her best for me. I shouted back that because she’d sent me to that school I’d tried to top myself. I ran upstairs to my bedroom. She followed and for the first time in my life, she put her arm around me. It felt so odd and strange I felt physically sick and had to move away.
 
The Impact of Having a Mother Who Was Emotionally Unavailable
 
So that’s a little of my pity party story. There’s much more but a lot involves other people and that is their story to tell. So how am I affected and what do I do about it?
 
Well, I never wanted children. I don’t have a maternal bone in me. I am shown pictures of babies and I don’t get it. I don’t feel this flush of warmth or emotion. But show me a puppy or an animal in pain or distress and I am weeping like a baby. I think I feel emotionally attached to animals more because they have no voice. They can’t tell you what is wrong. I felt the same way during childhood.
 
I have a cold heart. I always say I have a heart of stone. Nothing touches it. I’ve formed this hard barrier around it so nothing will crack it. This is a survival technique I learned as a child. Don’t let anyone in and you won’t be hurt.
 
A late boyfriend of mine used to say to me ‘You are a hard nut to crack’ and I never knew what he meant but now I do. He also said that I was either clingy of hostile. This is also true. You are either everything to me or you are nothing.
 
As a child, I had an avoidant attachment style. I had spent a long time trying to get my mother’s attention. Having failed I shut down and become ambivalent about her. As an adult, this has transformed into a dismissive-avoidant style where I keep myself to myself. I avoid contact with others and keep emotions at arm’s length.
 
Despite the former tirade, I don’t blame my mother for anything.
 
In fact, I am thankful she had me. It was the 60s, she was out of wedlock and she could easily have not have done so.
 
I remind myself that I am not my mother. I understand the weaknesses of my upbringing and that allows me to cope with life as an adult.
 
Then, I have a tendency to shut myself away from people and have to try hard to socialise. The saying ‘better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all’ doesn’t apply to me. If there is a chance of losing love I won’t love in the first place.
 
I know why I have to be the centre of attention when I am in company. It is because I craved it as a child and never got it. Likewise, I like to shock people and see their reaction. This goes directly back to my mother. I would intentionally shock her when I was a teen. Just to try and get something out of her.
 
Final Thoughts
 
I think that we need to remember that emotional neglect from an unavailable mother can be as damaging as abuse and physical neglect. However, understanding how any kind of neglect has affected you is key to moving forward.

 

 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:

 


 
A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com
 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 17:23
Terça-feira, 07 / 01 / 20

What Is the Meaning of a Baby in a Dream? 26 Different Scenarios

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

January 7th, 2020.

 
MEANING OF A BABY IN A DREAM.
 

 

Do you ever have a dream about a baby and wonder what it means? Whether you already have children, you want them or you are currently pregnant, most of us will experience the odd baby dream. But what is the meaning behind a baby in a dream?

 
What Babies Represent in Dreams and Real Life
 
Of course, as with all dreams, it’s about the context. In dreams, babies represent innocence and purity, but they can also symbolise immaturity and childishness.
 
A baby in real life is the epitome of our most basic and endearing love for another human being. However, babies also denote neediness. They demand our attention. Knowing which particular meaning your baby is suggesting in your dream isn’t easy. That’s why we’re here. To decipher each scenario and provide you with an answer.
 
There are many different scenarios in which you can encounter a baby in your dreams and each one will have a different meaning. So if you want to know what the baby in your dream means, read on.
 
26 Different Scenarios of a Baby in a Dream and the Meaning of Each
You are having a baby:
 
If you are not pregnant, this is a dream of new beginnings. You are starting a new phase in your life and feel as if it is a rebirth.
 
Baby boy:
 
This is an indication of masculine qualities, so think about the males in your life. Are there problems with a particular man at present? Consider how the male baby was acting. Was it being aggressive? Was it being playful? The significance is how the baby was acting and how you felt towards it.
 
Baby girl:
 
This represents feminine energy. Is there a powerful female in your life that is exerting control over you? If so, it is time to challenge that person. Naturally, the female baby can also represent you. If you are a woman, are you neglecting your feminine attributes? Or do you feel they are being suppressed for some reason?
 
Twin babies:
 
This is a very auspicious sign and is associated with great success. You will achieve promotions at work, climb the ladder at a faster pace than others (two steps at a time).
 
Lots of babies:
 
Lots of babies indicates a great exuberance for life. You have this enormous energy and lust for what you are doing right now. Your dream is telling you that you’re on the right path.
 
Mixed-race baby:
 
If the mixed-race baby was your own, you will succeed in your endeavours. To see a baby of a different race to your own indicates either great triumphs or great failures, there will be no in-between.
 
If you gave birth to a baby of a different race to your own, you will achieve successes beyond your wildest dreams. To have a white baby when you are of a different race means you will live an independent life.
 
Changing a baby’s nappy:
 
You need to take care of someone close to you. Perhaps someone is unwell and you can’t easily get to them.
 
Deceased baby:
 
Although terribly traumatic to dream about, the meaning of a dead baby is a symptom of stress in our real lives. So all it is suggesting is that we are already stressed and this is our subconscious letting us know that we are not coping well with it.
 
Happy baby:
 
This is an indication of all the good and pure things in you. You might have forgotten what a good person you are. It is time to remember.
 
Pretty baby:
 
 
Friends will help you through some tough times ahead. It is time to let them assist you. Don’t feel that you can or should go it alone. You don’t need to. You have all the support you need around you. All you need to do is to ask.
 
Ugly baby:
 
Watch out for treacherous behaviour close to you. There are friends or colleagues who don’t have your best interests at heart. You yourself don’t trust people. You don’t believe people are innocent or naïve.
 
Sick baby:
 
This is a warning of difficulties ahead in work or affairs of the heart. Be kind to yourself. Eat healthy food, get enough sleep, take time out to relax and do the things you enjoy. Try not to overwork. Make sure you spend quality time with loved ones. Put yourself first for a change.
 
Premature baby:
 
You’ll experience new and sudden problems without notice. You’ll need to be on your guard and to expect the unexpected at all times. Act on your gut instinct and listen to what it is telling you.
 
Walking baby:
 
You will suddenly experience great independence from your current situation. Be prepared to make great strides on your own; you are ready. This is the time to be brave and adventurous.
 
Crying baby:
 
You are lacking the attention you crave. This could be in a personal relationship or at work. Are you being taken for granted at home? Are your efforts at work being ignored?
 
Another meaning behind seeing a crying baby is that you are not realising your full potential. So the baby is pointing to you, reprimanding you for neglecting and not paying attention to your talents.
 
Evil baby:
 
If you saw a baby from The Omen in your dream, this represents the suppressed anger and dark side of your character you don’t want other people to see.
 
You might think that you need to keep this dark side of your psyche hidden, but it has a way of coming to the surface. If you work at resolving your inner feeling in a constructive way, you can be in control of how they come out.
 
Very tiny baby:
 
To dream about a very tiny baby means you are afraid of what the future holds for you.
 
Lost baby:
 
 
If you dreamt you lost your own baby, this is connected to your own fear as a new parent. You feel overwhelmed at the responsibility of becoming a new parent. If the baby lost was not your own, you are afraid of losing something very important in your life.
 
You forgot you had a baby:
 
This dream is an indication that you are trying very hard to hide your weaknesses from others. Or that you don’t want people close to you to know your deepest secrets.
 
Sleeping baby:
 
You are happy and contented in your real life. You have accomplished your goals and are in a good place, both at work and in your relationships.
 
Forgetting the baby:
 
If you forgot where you left your baby and it worried you, this signifies unhappiness with your career. You feel frustrated about an issue at work that doesn’t seem to be getting resolved.
 
Left the baby behind:
 
However, if you left the baby somewhere and you weren’t really that bothered, this indicates you have power over others. Or that you are trying to shift your responsibility onto someone else.
 
Falling baby:
 
The meaning of this baby dream is a warning to step away from conflict in your life. In the past, your reckless behaviour has led you into difficult situations.
 
Drowning baby:
 
This dream can be very distressing. In fact, the meaning behind is feeling overwhelmed at work. Ask for help before you become too ill to carry on.
 
You are holding a baby:
 
The meaning of this baby dream is clear; you miss a period of your life when you had no responsibilities. Perhaps your childhood or teenage years when you were looked after by your parents.
 
You are a baby:
 
This dream signifies a desire to return to an age of innocence where everything was easy and simple. Or a dream where you are a baby could mean you are suppressing a traumatic event that happened as a child.
 
Final Thoughts
 
Interpreting dreams about babies all depends on the situation and context of the dream. We hope we have covered the majority of these. Do you have an interesting dream about babies you’d like to share? We’d love to hear from you!

 
References:
  1. www.bustle.com
  2. www.webmd.com
 

 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:

 


 
A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
startpage.com

Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com
 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 17:21
Sábado, 28 / 12 / 19

20 Signs of a Narcissistic Perfectionist Who Is Poisoning Your Life

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

December 27th, 2019.

 
Narcissistic Perfectionist signs.
 
 
 
Psychological terms such as narcissism and perfectionist have been around for decades. We understand their character traits, even if we don’t possess them ourselves. But what happens when the two collide? Is there such a thing as a narcissistic perfectionist? And if so, what impact does it have on a person’s life?
 
Understanding the Narcissistic Perfectionist
 
It is easy to explain this kind of person. We simply break down the two components of their personality.
 
 
So, we know that narcissists, as well as putting themselves first, have the following character traits:
 
Narcissists:
  • A grandiose sense of self
  • A sense of entitlement
  • They think they are special and unique
 
On the other hand, perfectionists set themselves impossibly high standards.
 
Perfectionists:
  • Strive for flawless performance
  • They will work tirelessly, be extremely self-critical.
  • Some will have a tendency to procrastinate.
 
Now, it’s not quite as simple as putting these two character traits together. This is because the narcissist who is also a perfectionist projects their perfectionism onto other people, not themselves. This is the difference between a perfectionist and a person with narcissistic traits.
 
The narcissistic perfectionist sets these unrealistic goals and targets for other people. Furthermore, they get angry and hostile if they don’t reach these impossible goals.
 
Dr. Simon Sherry is a clinical psychologist and an associate professor. He works in the Department of Psychology and Neuroscience.
 
 
“Narcissistic perfectionists have a need for other people to satisfy their unreasonable expectations… And if you don’t, they get angry.” Dr. Simon Sherry
 
Studies into This Type of Personality
 
Studies included researching the biographies of famous CEOs with narcissistic perfectionism. Employees reported their bosses lashing out at them for very minor mistakes. They would be held in high-esteem one minute then go from ‘hero to zero’ the next.
 
 
In addition, employees would be routinely derogated in front of co-workers. The CEOs would be hyper-critical, to the point of outright hostility.
 
So why is this combination so lethal?
 
“But high expectations paired with feelings of grandiosity and entitlement to the perfect performance of others creates a much more negative combination.” Dr. Simon Sherry
 
So far we have talked about top CEOs, but what about in everyday life? What if the perfectionist narcissist is a member of your own family?
 
Logan Nealis is a Clinical Psychology Ph.D. student. He is working with the Personality Research Team.
 
 
“A narcissistic perfectionist parent demands perfect performance from his daughter on the hockey rink, but not necessarily from anyone else out there.” Logan Nealis
 
But it’s not just about demanding perfection from people around them. It is also about basking in the glow of success through the perfection achieved by those around them. The narcissist can say, through these perfect achievements, ‘Look how good I am!’
Typical Behaviors of a Narcissistic Perfectionist
 
So how can you spot someone with narcissistic perfectionist tendencies? According to recent studies, there are several major red flags:
 
“Our most consistent finding across the two studies is that narcissistic perfectionism is associated with social negativity in the form of anger, derogation, conflict and hostility,” explains Dr. Sherry.
 
This social negativity goes hand-in-hand with the narcissist’s sense of superiority. So they won’t just take the time to critically humiliate you. In fact, they’ll do all of that whilst maintaining this sense that they are better than you.
 
The narcissist who also believes in perfectionism will react in violent and hostile outbursts. These outbursts will be a complete over-reaction to the mistake in question. For example, imagine that you have made one very small spelling error on a document. The narcissist perfectionist boss would drag you out in front of your co-workers, shout and scream at you and sack you on the spot.
 
Also, don’t forget, any errors will never be the narcissist’s fault. It is inconceivable to them that they might be wrong or the mistake is theirs. This black and white thinking just adds to the problem.
 
“In the world view of a narcissistic perfectionist, the problem exists outside of themselves. It’s the co-worker, it’s the spouse, it’s the roommate.” Dr Sherry
 
20 Signs Someone You Know Is a Narcissistic Perfectionist
 
  1. Many of us work for bosses that demand perfection. But what’s the difference between someone who wants the best work from you, or the narcissist who just happens to be a perfectionist too? And what about family and friends? Do you recognise any of the following signs?
  2. They set impossible demands/targets/goals
  3. These goals are for everyone else, not themselves
  4. They react inappropriately when something does not go their way
  5. You are always walking on eggshells around them
  6. You never know how they are going to react
  7. They are hyper-critical in everything you do
  8. Everything you do is up for criticism
  9. The rules apply to you but not to them
  10. They can bend the rules, but you never can
  11. They get impatient with you
  12. They demand great things from you
  13. You can’t ever be yourself around them
  14. You’re afraid of them
  15. They’re unprofessional at work
  16. They expect too much from you
  17. You’re not allowed to offer ‘excuses’
  18. It’s never their fault
  19. They are always right
  20. They don’t want to hear explanations
  21. If you make a mistake, they get hostile and angry
 
You might recognise some of the above signs. They may apply to a boss, a partner, a friend or a family member. Dealing with the narcissistic perfectionist in your life depends on the circumstances. If it is your boss, there might not be much you can do apart from seeking alternative employment.
 
For personal relationships, however, Dr. Sherry believes that getting the person to understand the impact of their behaviour is the way forward. Typically, the narcissist will not seek treatment. They may do it only in the end stages when their marriage has failed, or they have lost a company for example.
 
Final Thoughts
 
It is extremely difficult to change the mindset of a narcissist, particularly one with perfectionist traits. Sometimes the only thing you can do is leave, for your own sanity.
  1. medicalxpress.com
  2. www.sciencedaily.com
  3. www.researchgate.net
 

 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 06:17
Quinta-feira, 19 / 12 / 19

What Do Dreams about Spiders Mean? 9 Possible Interpretations

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

December 17th, 2019.

 
DREAMS ABOUT SPIDERS.
 
 
 
Many of us suffer from arachnophobia, a fear of spiders, but what does it mean if you dream about them? Is it a sign you should be fearful in real life? Or could there be other possible explanations? Actually, dreams about spiders have several different meanings. In fact, there are some you might be quite surprised about.
 
Dreams about Spiders and What They Represent
 
Spiders represent many different qualities and ideals. Due to their industrious nature, they are associated with creativity. They are frightening and devious. In addition, they are also patient and some people even relate them to good fortune.
 
Here Are Nine Meanings behind Spider Dreams:
 
Powerful Feminine Force
 
We all know about the deadly black widow spider that eats the male after mating. In fact, spiders are a symbol of a strong feminine force. Spiders are associated with feminine traits of:
  • Patience
  • Receptivity
  • Creativity
 
The spider represents a powerful female in your life. That female could be you or someone in your family or circle of friends.
 
It is how you react to the spider that is particularly interesting. For example, if the spider terrified you that could be a sign that you are repressing your feminine side. Or that you feel threatened by a powerful female in your midst.
 
If the spider didn’t bother you, or you were not bothered by the spider, this indicates a positive increase in feminine energy around you.
 
Patience
 
Spiders weave webs and then lie in wait for their prey to stumble into them. Spiders take lots of time and care to create intricate webs to catch their prey. Therefore, a dream about spiders could suggest that you need to be more patient with a particular situation in your life.
 
Feeling trapped
 
Spider’s webs are designed and made to catch prey. As such, your dream about spiders could be your subconscious telling you that you feel trapped. Are there any situations in your life that you feel like you want to escape? Are family or work pressures getting to you? Talk to someone and share your fears.
 
Manipulation
 
However, a spider’s web is also associated with lying and manipulation.
 
 
“O, what a tangled web we weave when first we practise to deceive!” Walter Scott
 
Therefore, watching a spider spin its web can suggest two things. First, that you are being manipulated or that you’re the one doing the manipulating. You should take a careful look at your life. Second, is someone trying to fool you or trick you? Or, are you trying to get one over on someone in your life?
 
Fearful Anxieties
 
Of course, for most people, the thought of a big, fat hairy spider is enough to scare them. There really isn’t any other animal, insect or creature that causes such a universal fear in us. So a spider that appears in a dream could be a sign of hidden anxieties. This is especially true if the spider was hanging over you, dangling in your way. This type of dream indicates someone you are trying to avoid but can’t get away from.
 
Furthermore, a spider dream can also be your subconscious asking you to dig deep and find the cause of your real fear in real life. If the spider was crawling on you, then the spider is definitely a negative force. The spider represents negative things in your life that you are trying to rid yourself from. These can be people, habits or addictions.
 
Prosperity
 
I have to add another – however. This is because a dangling spider is also a symbol of good luck and fortune. The tiny little spiders we use to twirl around our heads three times are even called ‘money spiders’.
 
Consequently, a dream about spiders, in general, can be a good sign. In fact, if you look up spiders in dream dictionaries, you’ll quite often see that they are a good omen.
 
Creativity
 
The beautiful and intricate webs I talked about earlier are wonderful, natural creations. It takes great skill and endeavours to produce these marvels of nature. Therefore, a spider in your dream doesn’t have to be a negative or frightening sign. Actually, it could point to a period of intense creativity in your life.
 
To understand how this sign of creativity relates to your life, examine closely the structure of the web itself. For instance, is it strong with lots of detail? Is it big and impressive or a bit sad-looking? Will it stand up to the forces of nature? Or, is it wispy and fragile? Does it look weak and unable to support itself?
 
These details will give you clues about how you feel about your creative endeavour. And, more importantly, whether you need to make an extra effort if you want to fulfil your dreams.
 
Betrayal
 
There are certain scenarios within dreams about spiders that you should be wary of. For example, if the spider bit you, or it was poisonous and attacking you. These are signs of a major betrayal in your life. Also, spider bites also indicate a bad relationship that you need to act on quickly. Or it could be a sign there is a toxic person (usually female) in your life.
 
Progress
 
Spiders are hardworking. They toil for hours to make the webs to catch their food. As a result, if you saw a spider climbing in your dream it is a sign you are moving in the right direction. Your dreams about spiders are showing you that you’re making good progress with your endeavours.
Final thoughts
 
Spiders are scary in real life. But we can see that this doesn’t necessarily mean that you should be scared if your dream featured spiders. Examine the context of your dream and you’ll find the true meaning.
 
References:

  1. www.bustle.com
  2. www.elitedaily.com
  3. www.huffingtonpost.co.uk
 

 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:

 


 
A Trusty with Privacy Search 
Alternative to Google
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Alternative to YouTube
brighteon.com
 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 04:30
Segunda-feira, 02 / 12 / 19

What Do Dreams about Sharks Mean? Scenarios and Interpretations

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

December 1st, 2019.

 
DREAMS ABOUT SHARKS.
 
 
 
Sharks. Denizens of the deep. Fearsome predators. Sharks have a negative association in real life. Just two bars of music from Jaws conjures up the image of that terrifying mouth of razor-sharp teeth rising from the ocean. So what do dreams about sharks mean?
 
Does the presence of a shark in your dream indicate a threat in real life? Is it, therefore, a warning to be careful? But we often swim with sharks so it is a signal to be more daring? Let’s first look at what sharks in dreams represent. Then we can interpret various scenarios.
 
Dreams about Sharks
 
What Emotions Do Sharks Represent?
 
Sharks are associated with several emotions:
  • Fear
  • Coldness
  • Ruthlessness
  • Fear
 
The obvious emotion is fear. Sharks are predators. They are at the top of the food chain. Sharks are masters of the kill. As such, there is nothing that can kill a shark. The thing about a dream with sharks is that they feel so frightening. When we think about sharks in real life we picture that ominous black tail fin, gliding through the sea. It is waiting for the opportune moment to strike.
 
Likewise, we think of those distinctive rows of pointed teeth, sticking out from a yawning mouth. So dreams about sharks are nearly always associated with fear or the threat of something.
 
Coldness
 
Sharks are also known for being cold. Those cold, blank, dead eyes are emotionless. Even during a bloody feeding frenzy. They remain impassive and detached. Sharks are a bit like the Terminator. You cannot reason with them. And they absolutely will not stop, until you are dead.
 
Ruthlessness
 
Like the Terminator analogy, sharks are savage, ruthless killers. They will pursue their prey for miles to get a kill. Or they will wait patiently for the opportune moment. But whatever happens, they’ll never give up.
 
Now we have a basic understanding about dreams with sharks, let’s get down to the nitty-gritty of what they actually mean.
 
Animals in dreams have particular importance. As a result, we need to examine them carefully. Sometimes the animal represents you, the dreamer. Other times it can be a symbol of family or friends. The type of animal is obviously, very important.
 
Sharks as People in Your Lives
 
The Shark Represents You
 
 
 
Water, particularly underwater, is associated with our subconscious. Therefore, it stands to reason that dreams about fish or creatures, such as sharks, that live underwater also relate to deeply-entrenched thoughts and emotions.
 
However, dreaming about a shark doesn’t necessarily mean you are a cold, ruthless person. In actual fact, it could signify that you have unresolved issues or fears that you’ve pushed down. Consequently, these are now resurfacing and need dealing with.
 
In contrast, consider the scenario where people swim with sharks as a personal challenge. Your subconscious mind is connecting the shark with something you are afraid of and asking you to face it.
 
As sharks have a pretty negative association, a dream about one could also indicate a negative part of your identity. None of us likes to admit we may have character flaws. Therefore, it’s likely that we’ve either buried them or haven’t acknowledged them. Your dream is prodding you. It’s saying that you need to recognise that you are not perfect.
 
For instance, you might have anger issues, a bad temper, or act in a coercive-controlling way with a partner. Either way, the shark in your dream is all about getting you to be more enlightened about yourself.
 
The Shark Is Someone in Your Life
 
Negativity is the game here. So what are the major characteristics of the shark? Well, we know they exact fear, they are cold and ruthless. But there’s another aspect in dreams about sharks, and that’s greed.
 
Sharks symbolise greed. They are gluttonous creatures with an insatiable appetite. Dreaming about sharks is a signal that you feel drained by someone close to you. This draining feeling can either be in an emotional or financial way. But whichever way it is, the person who is represented by the shark in your dream is after something that you have. Furthermore, they don’t care who it upsets or affects.
 
Dream Scenarios about Sharks
 
 
You saw a shark: This is a symbol of your own ruthlessness, greed and cold-blooded nature in real life.
 
You saw a shark fin: A fin of a shark is a warning in a dream as it is in real life. Be careful, there are difficult times ahead.
 
The shark was in a pool or aquarium: You have strong sexual desires that are not being fulfilled right now. Time to accept who you are.
 
You were a shark: You have the qualities of a shark, i.e. you are ruthless and tend to get what you want. This dream is suggesting that you could be more sensitive.
 
You came across a dead shark: You’ll overcome any enemies and outwit those who try to deceive you.
 
You killed a shark: It is time to end a bad relationship. You have the control.
 
You caught a shark: Face up to a difficult problem quickly and you will overcome it.
 
A shark attacked you: This is not a good omen, it signifies an accident-prone period or a time of ill-health.
 
The shark bit your leg off: You should think very carefully before making major decisions.
 
The shark bit off your hand or arm: Be watchful of your colleagues, they may not have your best interests at heart.
 
The shark swallowed your whole body: You feel powerless in real life. You need to think laterally to solve the problems.
 
You fought the shark and survived: You will need to fight in real life but you will succeed.
 
You ate a shark: You have a lot of negative emotions and aggression inside. Time to get help so you can release them in a healthy manner.
 
Final Thoughts
 
Dreams about sharks can feel terrifying at the time. But they can also reveal a huge amount of information. So, take your time, think about the dream and use it to move forward in your life.
 
References:

 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 02:47
Segunda-feira, 02 / 12 / 19

Why Social Media Is Toxic and Bad for Your Mental Health

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

November 30th, 2019.

 
.why social media is toxic
 
 

 
Do you suffer from Facebook Envy or Sadfishing? Have you ever heard of Internet Banging? The internet is an amazing tool for the majority of us. As a result, more and more teenagers are spending longer online and without parental supervision. But some experts are now saying that social media is toxic. Here are just a few examples of how social media can be bad for your mental health.
 
4 Examples of Why Social Media Is Toxic
 
Sadfishing
 
If you haven’t heard of sadfishing it is the latest toxic trend to hit social media sites. Sadfishing is where someone (typically a young person) posts about a personal problem, usually in an ambiguous way, to garner sympathy and attention.
 
 
Examples might include:
  • I can’t go on like this for much longer.
  • I hate my life so much.
  • Feel like ending it all.
  • No one understands me.
  • What’s the point in carrying on?
 
Famous celebrity examples include Kendall Jenner and Justin Bieber. These two celebrities poured their hearts out on social media. Afterwards they received hundreds of thousands of likes on Instagram. More to the point, their personal stories of heartbreak garnered huge publicity for the pair.
 
However, there is a downside to sharing raw and emotional material online. For example, a young person posts a very personal and extremely distressing part of their lives but doesn’t get the support they imagined. Instead, they are ridiculed or bullied. Or even worse, encouraged to do something suicidal.
 
But there’s an even more worrying aspect to this toxic trend in social media. That is of grooming offenders using these comments to infiltrate the minds of vulnerable young people.
 
Consequently, the groomer will sympathise with the young person, possibly sharing stories themselves to engage further. This is all done to trap and ensnare the vulnerable person.
 
What To Do
 
Talk to a real person. A friend, family member, a teacher or someone you trust. Keep very personal issues off social media.
Facebook Envy
 
Another example of a toxic trend in social media is Facebook envy. Do you look at your friend’s posts on Facebook and secretly feel jealous of their life?
 
The problem is that the face we present to social media is the best face possible. We photoshop our selfies to look like supermodels and celebrities.
 
Furthermore, we glamourise our lives so that we only show the most interesting parts. We highlight our best achievements. Romances are always perfect with our partners doing everything for us. No wonder our friends worry that their own lives don’t match up.
 
But in the real world, this constant comparing of each other’s lives can cause actual depression, low self-esteem and feelings of worthlessness.
 
What to do
 
Don’t compare your life to your friends or your family. Remember, no one knows exactly what is going on behind the perfectly presented front of social media. In actual fact, the reality is likely to be much different.
 
Internet Banging
 
Studies suggest that gangs have moved from the streets to the internet. The clashes and taunts between rival gangs in the USA and now the UK has spilt over onto Twitter. Now, threats of online violence often end up in murder.
 
In fact, it is the relatively cheap cost of smartphones and the raised knowledge of street gangs in using the technology that has led to an upsurge in crime in some areas.
 
Likewise, thanks to social media, gang members have instant access to information. This includes names and addresses of potential victims. Members use platforms like Twitter to taunt their rivals.
 
“They’ll go on the streets of the group and they’ll take pictures or they’ll take a video and they’ll put it on YouTube or ‘We’re in your neighbourhood.’ And Facebook and they’ll take pictures right in the neighbourhood like saying, ‘Ha ha,’ laughing, taunting them. And that’s part of a taunt too. Like provoking them, letting them know, you know what we got your guy. He was snoozing.” Mario (violence worker)
 
As a result, the US is now experiencing a huge rise in gang-related crime.
 
What to do
 
Authorities are already trying to use social media to de-escalate violence before it starts. In order to interrupt the dialogue between gangs, they are encouraging relationships within them.
 
Glorifying Overworking
 
Do you know someone that is always busy? They have the hardest lives, they are continually on the go, and they never have a moment’s peace? In other words, they wear their hard work like a martyr’s badge of honour.
 
In today’s society, if you work yourself to the bone, it is seen as a prized character trait. Working longer hours, working harder, giving up time to work, these are all signs of dedication, of, well let’s face it, hard work.
 
To put it another way, there is a correlation between hours worked and the contribution to the household. We glorify those that come home exhausted and grumpy. We tiptoe around them and shush the children because so-and-so has been working all day. People that take time off, that only work part-time, they are lazy, irresponsible, and no good for the family or society.
 
The problem is that by glorifying overworking we are normalising working long hours. In reality, a balance between working and family time is far better for everyone’s mental health.
 
What to do
 
Don’t place so much importance on telling everyone how busy you are. It is not something to be proud of. Actually, it shows that you are bad at time-management and delegation.
 
Final Thoughts
 
Many people use the internet to keep in touch with friends and family and for the majority, it is a good place. However, for others – social media is toxic and damaging to their mental health. If we know why it can be toxic we can hopefully protect ourselves and our mental wellbeing.
 
References:
 
 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
Free counters!

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publicado por achama às 02:19
Quinta-feira, 28 / 11 / 19

9 Signs of a Scam Artist and Manipulation Tools They Use

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

November 27th, 2019.

 
scam artist signs.
 
 

 
 
I’ve always been interested in the darker side of a person’s personality, particularly deviant behaviour. I want to know why someone might stray from the straight and narrow. So I often watch programmes about scam artists and their victims. And I think to myself, how did they fall for their tricks? Do they use specific tools to manipulate a person? Do they have to have particular character traits to pull off a scam? Is there a perfect victim? Well, all of the above is true. But before we examine the signs of a scam artist, let’s look at the type of person they target.
 
The Perfect Time for Scam Artists
 
Unfortunately, anyone can fall victim to a scam artist. We are all incredibly busy these days. We don’t have the time to scrutinise every email or text or phone call. Furthermore, scam artists are targeting us from every conceivable angle.
 
Decades ago, a con-artist would have to be confident and articulate. They would have to have face-to-face communication skills to convince someone to part with their cash. In fact, we get the term con-man from ‘confidence-man’. But things have changed massively.
 
These days, we talk to people who are thousands of miles away without even seeing them. Likewise, there are many different forms of communication. And that’s a major difference for our time.
 
In the past, a con-man would have to face his victim. He (or she) would see, up close and personal, the damage done as a result of their con. Now, scammers are people sat far away, in their tracksuits, targeting anonymous people who they have no emotional connection to at all.
 
As a result, anyone and everyone are under constant attack. If our wits are down our defences are wide open.
 
So who is a perfect victim for a scam artist?
 
Scam artists will look for a certain victim-type, depending on the scam they want to pull off. It is important to remember that a victim of a scam is not stupid. This is because scammers play to our emotions, not our intelligence. So, anyone who is in a vulnerable state is, particularly at risk.
 
For example, a person who has recently lost their job, a partner, a child. Someone who is going through a major life upheaval. But also positive things can make you vulnerable. For instance, a run of extremely good luck can skew your judgment.
 
Successful scams all hinge on desire over rationality. Victims of scams often don’t want to know a lot of details about the scam. They just need to know the outcome. In other words, will they be better off?
 
“Victims don’t look for why the offer is a scam; they look for why the offer will make them money. They want you to make them feel good so they can pull the trigger.” Anonymous scammer
9 Signs of a Scam Artist and Their Manipulation Tools
They use your name
 
Using a person’s first name is a powerful way to emotionally connect with someone. It instantly creates a bond between two people. You feel special, as if you are important to that person, particularly if it is your first meeting.
 
They mirror your body language
 
This is a classic manipulation tool that scammers use. By copying your body language, the scam artist is subconsciously forming an attachment with you. You feel attracted to them but you are not sure why.
 
‘We’re in this together’
 
‘We’re in this together.’ ‘You and I are going to be rich.’ ‘We’re gonna make a lot of money.’ Firstly, why would someone want to share their wealth with you? Particularly if you are a stranger to them?
 
Human beings tend to want to hoard their wealth so be very wary if a complete stranger wants to include you in a money-making scheme. Secondly, you’ll feel more like a team and less like you are alone in any risk-taking activity.
 
But there’s always a time limit
 
You often see unscrupulous salespeople do this in order to close a deal. There’s this fantastic offer on hand, but, you have to sign on the dotted line within an hour or the deal is gone. This tactic plays on the FOMO effect. We don’t want to miss out on a great deal. Listen, no deal is that good it doesn’t stand up to scrutiny and time spent away reflecting on it.
 
You’ll win a little at first
 
To get you to sign up to whatever scam is going, you will win a small amount of money in the short-term. This is done to build your confidence. It is also done to lock you into a situation. Now you are tied into a scheme. You are invested, literally and figuratively. You have a psychological need to continue. Of course, it won’t last.
 
Scam artists are good listeners
 
You might think that the majority of scammers are skilled in communication, but having good listening skills is equally important. The reason they listen a lot is that they need to know what will seal the deal for you and what a deal breaker is.
 
They’ll show their imperfections
 
Studies show that we trust a person that is not perfect. In the beginning, a scam artist will let you in on a little flaw of theirs that shows their imperfections. Of course, it won’t be a massive thing to put you off. I mean, they won’t confide that they are a psychopath who has just killed their mother. It will be just small enough to earn your trust.
 
Scammers start off small
 
Romance con-artists tend to ask for small amounts of money which then get bigger and bigger over time. The reasons can vary from paying off small debts to helping stop bankruptcy. Although the amounts may begin under 100 pounds or dollars, the victim can end up giving away their life-savings of over hundreds of thousands.
A scam artist will count on your embarrassment
 
Why do so many scams go unpunished or unprosecuted? Because the victim feels so embarrassed about being conned. And this is what the scammer is depending on. We often see elderly victims of scams refusing to come forward because they feel so ashamed about being scammed.
 
Final Thoughts
 
With so many scam artists out there, it is important to keep our wits about us. Probably the most important advice is that if a deal seems too good to be true, it is.
 

References:

  1. thebalance.com
  2. www.vox.com
  3. www.rd.com

 
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 09:33
Sábado, 23 / 11 / 19

3 Ways Freedom of Thought Is Being Compromised Today and What to Do

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

November 22nd, 2019.

 
FREEDOM OF THOUGHT.
 
 

 
Luckily, the majority of us have free speech, but what about freedom of thought? Surely we own our thoughts? There is nothing that can influence them? I mean, we are not living in some dystopian future where we have to monitor what we think. And as far as I’m aware, no one can delve into our minds to know exactly what we are thinking.
 
But we are being influenced. So how is this happening and what can we do about it?
 
Why Freedom of Thought Ιs So Important
 
First of all, why is the freedom to have an uninfluenced thought process so important? Undoubtedly, the Theory of Mind (ToM) is what sets us apart from other animals. This is the ability to think and to process thoughts. It’s what makes us human. But what exactly is a thought?
 
Thinking allows us to make sense of the world around us. Therefore, a thought is a single product of this thinking. The way we ponder, process emotions, plan for the future, daydream about a loved one, construct a mental shopping list, or go over an argument in our minds. These are all examples of different thoughts.
 
Lots of things influence our thoughts. Our senses, past experiences, our environment, what we read, see and hear our family and friends, basically everything around us. Thoughts are important because they lead to decisions and actions. They affect us in our daily lives. We make choices based on our thoughts. Anything from what kind of sandwich to eat at lunch to who we’ll vote for at an election.
 
Therefore, freedom of thought is essential. We don’t want anyone or anything influencing our way of thinking. But research shows this is exactly what is happening.
The Way We Think Is Changing
 
We have made great strides in psychology over the past few decades. In the 19-century, a person with a mental illness would be labelled ‘feebleminded’. Fast forward to the 21-century and we now have 265 actual mental disorder diagnoses in the most recent DSM-5. We should know how freedom of thought can be compromised. Instead, the very advances in understanding the human mind are being used to restrict it.
 
Likewise, the way technology works now compared to even a decade ago is far-reaching. Was the term ‘fake news’ even a thing 10 years ago? Who had heard of Russian troll farms or bots a few years ago? However, these technological innovations are manipulating our thoughts, even though we still believe we have the freedom to think the way we do.
How Freedom of Thought Is Compromised
Psychological Understanding
 
Understanding the way we think is crucial if you want to manipulate it. Now experts in psychology know all about mental biases, how we make decisions and what influences our behaviour.
 
So, how does this work in the real world? Say you were a small company selling your products. You wanted to increase sales. You would use every psychological trick in the book to get your customers to buy, not only in the first place but repeatedly. This is a basic example of how thought and the freedom to think clearly are compromised.
 
 
Anyone with this knowledge can use it to their advantage. For example, politicians, social media sites, large brands. Politician play on their voter’s natural stereotypes or biases. Big brands exploit customer’s mental affiliation with their logos and symbols. Social media sites have a huge pool of data, ready to be captured, analysed and put to use.
Social Media Manipulation
 
Talking of social media, the founder of Facebook got into a lot of trouble in 2014. He admitted to a ‘mood experiment’ carried out on its users. In a vast experiment, the social media site found that by posting certain information on people’s pages it could make them feel more positive or negative.
 
Now, obviously this has far-reaching ramifications. We assume Facebook is not purposely manipulating the way we feel. But this is just the tip of the iceberg.
 
Facebook has recently acquired a ‘mind-reading’ company. The company makes a wristband that decodes electronic signals from the brain. The purpose? To control your computer with your mind. As one Facebook member said:
 
 
“Oh. Look at that. Facebook’s newest venture: harvesting thoughts,” Facebook member
 
But Facebook isn’t the only one who is using mindreading tech. Other major computer tech firms, such as Microsoft, are also in the game of gathering up our thoughts and restricting our freedom in the process.
Advanced Technology
 
We are certainly influenced by social media. Many of us, in fact, get our news from online sources, and not the paper versions. This is highly susceptible to manipulation. In fact, only yesterday, one political party was severely warned by Twitter for changing their Twitter name to FactCheckUK, during a contentious leader’s debate in the UK.
How to Ensure Your Thoughts Are Not Manipulated
 
We often react instinctively and quickly. This reflex action comes from the old reptilian part of our brain. This old ancient brain makes quick mental shortcuts. It has to, in order for us to survive. It helped our ancestors quickly make decisions that were life-saving.
 
 
But, in today’s world, we don’t need this rapid reflex-thinking so much. The problem with thinking instinctively and quickly is that we rely on past stereotypes. And this is where biases can occur.
 
We can stop these biases by taking a reasonable amount of time to think and then make our decision. In this way, we weigh up all the evidence, not just what is being presented to us, but what we research ourselves. Then we can make an informed choice.
 
Furthermore, if we have a clearer understanding of how our minds work, we can spot the manipulators a mile off. Don’t con a con I always say!
Tips to Protect the Freedom of Your Thoughts
Don’t make instant decisions
Allow yourself the space to walk away and come back to the issue
Think about why you are getting so emotional
Has what you have read/watched quickly reinforced your own beliefs?
Are you only getting the same views echoed back to you?
Take time to get other people’s views
Don’t be pressurised to make a choice
Participate in discussions where others share an opposing view
Final Thoughts
 
It’s hard not to feel instantly gratified when someone agrees with you. Or when you get your bias confirmed. It is much harder to step back and analyse your own way of thinking.
 
Are you really expressing your own thoughts? Or has your freedom been compromised? Ensuring that we have the freedom to think an authentic thought is essential. Otherwise, how will we ever know if the choices and decisions we make are from our true self?
 
References:
Janey Davies

 





About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 13:34
Domingo, 10 / 11 / 19

7 Famous Fairy Tales That Are Based on Gruesome True Life Stories

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

November 7th, 2019.

 
famous fairy tales real stories.
 
 

 

What is it about fairy tales that captivate the imaginations of children? Could it be that underneath the thin veneer of fiction lies a much darker truth to the tales? Did you know that the most famous fairy tales are based on gruesome real-life stories? Here are just a few:
 
Famous Fairy Tales and the Creepy Real Stories Behind Them
Bluebeard
 
I loved this fairy tale as a child. So much so that I would beg my sister to read it to me every night before bed. I knew it off by heart and sometimes she would try and skip a line or two. Whenever she did, I would tell her off.
 
The story is pretty awful as a famous fairy tale in its own right. A king named Bluebeard marries a beautiful young princess and takes her to his magnificent castle. He gives her the keys to all the rooms in the castle but tells her not to open the last door in an underground chamber.
 
He then goes off hunting and of course, naturally inquisitive, the young queen goes down to the room and opens the door. Here she finds blood everywhere and the king’s previous wives, murdered and hanging on hooks.
 
Horrified she drops the key in the blood and tries to wash it off. But the blood won’t come off. Will she face the same fate? Luckily, her brother races to her rescue in time to kill Bluebeard.
 
This famous fairy tale is based on two real-life characters. Conomor the Cursed is a savage 6th-century ruler in Breton. This Breton chief had been warned that one of his sons would end up killing him. As a result, he pre-empts this by killing all of his pregnant wives.
 
However, his last wife, Tryphine, is also warned by the ghosts of the murdered wives. She flees but he finds her and beheads her. Miraculously, a sacred monk brings her back to life and when they return to Conomor’s castle the walls collapse around him.
 
The second character is the 15th-century nobleman and notorious serial killer Gilles de Rais. This man earned a formidable reputation fighting alongside Joan of Arc. Yet, in his private life, he murdered children.
 
He was given the nickname of Bluebeard because of the peculiar way his horse’s mane looked blue in the daytime. Gilles de Rais is one of the world’s most evil psychopaths.
 
Hansel and Gretel
 
 
 
 
This is one of those fairy tales that is famous because the story resonates with children today. It tells of a poor woodcutter and his second wife. She is the stepmother to his children – Hansel and Gretel.
 
As food becomes scarce, the stepmother decides there is not enough food for the children. So she persuades the woodcutter to take the children deep into the forest where they won’t be able to find their way home.
 
They come across a witches’ house made of gingerbread. Eventually, they get the better of the witch and return home with the spoils of her house.
 
The story is set during the Great Famine of 1315. Many people starved to death during this time. Acts of extreme cruelty, such as infanticide and cannibalism, took place as people became more desperate. The situation for some families became so wretched that they left their children to fend for themselves.
 
The gingerbread house part of the story comes from a highly profitable baker called Katharina Schraderin. She became legendary in the 1600s thanks to her gingerbread cookies, which everyone wanted. One male baker was so determined to get her recipe he accused her of being a witch.
 
As a result, she was hounded and driven out of the town. But, then in an awful twist, her neighbours brought her back and burned her to death in one of her baking ovens.
 
 
 
Cinderella
 
Cinderella is every young girl’s dream, right? Well, perhaps not mine, as you’ve already heard, I was getting a taste for psychopaths and sociopaths.
 
Everyone knows in this famous fairy tale that Cinders has a tough life. She has to do all the chores, look after her evil stepsisters, and might miss out on the Ball. But, it all comes good in the end. She gets the gorgeous frock, she arrives in a splendid carriage and meets Prince Charming. Furthermore, the story has a happy ending.
 
However, the real-life tale is not so pretty and there’s no happy ever after for Cinders. The story is based around a slave girl in ancient Greece, around 500BC. Rhodopis was a beautiful young Greek woman. At a young age, she was taken from her home in Greece and forced into slavery.
 
Rhodopis was exquisitely beautiful and men lusted after her. As such, she became a prized possession and men showered her with expensive gifts. One of these gifts was a pair of golden shoes.
 
Pharaoh Ahmose II saw the shoes and Rhodopis and wanted her for himself. Although strictly she was not of royal blood, he married her. Her life was to be a ready and willing sex slave to the pharaoh.
 
Beauty and the Beast
 
This is one of those famous fairy tales that you wouldn’t expect to have a real story behind it. But it does.
 
In 1537, a young boy aged 10 called Gonsalvus, was taken from his home in Spain to the Royal French court. Here he was ordered to entertain the King of France. Why? Because he suffered from a condition called hypertrichosis. This causes someone to grow hair all over their body. It is called ‘werewolf syndrome’.
 
The king was enamoured with his little ‘beast’. He educated him and he became a nobleman. When the king died, his wife found the beast a wife. Despite his looks, the pair did fall in love. They had seven children (all of whom also suffered from hypertrichosis) and were married for 40 years.
 
Rapunzel
 
‘Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your golden hair!’ I remember this story from my childhood. I kept thinking, why is she waiting for someone to come and rescue her? But the real-life story behind this fairy tale might explain it.
 
As unusual, we have the beautiful protagonist, this time it is an auburn-haired girl living in the 3rd century. Her overbearing father was a wealthy merchant who travelled abroad all the time. No man was good enough for his daughter so when he went off on his travels he locked her up in a tower.
 
It was during these times in the tower that she turned to Christianity to help her through the loneliness. Her praying was so loud the whole town could hear her. The rich merchant was a pagan. Her Christian prayers so angered him that he forced her to stand trial before a Roman consul to give up her religion.
 
The consul demanded the merchant give up his wealth or behead his daughter, should she refuse her Christianity. As she refused, and the merchant would not forfeit the fortune he amassed, he did behead her.
 
However, he was killed by a random lightning bolt shortly afterwards. The daughter was martyred and became Saint Barbara.
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
 
This famous fairy tale has a happy ending. Snow White is hunted by an evil queen who wants to kill her. Seven dwarfs rescue and befriend her. However, the reality is much different and far more gruesome.
 
The story starts in the 16th century in Bavaria. It centres on a young noblewoman called Margarete von Waldeck. Margarete’s brother employs small children to labour in his copper mine. But because of the crippling conditions, the children become dreadfully deformed. The locals begin calling them dwarves to mock them.
 
Now, if this wasn’t bad enough, Margarete was exceptionally beautiful. As such, her stepmother resented her and wanted her out of the picture. She packed her off to Brussels to get rid of her.
 
Here, Margarete began a lustful affair with Prince Philip II of Spain. However, his father, the King of Spain vehemently disagreed with the romance. He organised a plot to kill Margarete. She was poisoned shortly afterwards.
 
The Pied Piper of Hamelin
 
 
 
A pied piper in Hamelin was known for his ability to play hypnotic music and charm certain animals. So, in 1264, the villagers asked him to play his pipe and get rid of all the rats plaguing the area. They promised him a hefty fee for his troubles. Of course, the piper agreed and played his pipe. Soon all the rats followed him to their death.
 
He went back to the villagers who reneged on the deal. Angry and bitter at them, he went out once again to play his pipe. But, this time, it was the children that fell entranced to his hypnotic tune. They followed the piper and were never seen again.
 
The Dark Truth Behind Famous Fairy Tales
 
Most famous fairy tales have a happy ending. The real-life stories behind some of these show that the truth is far from happy ever after.
 
References:
 
Janey Davies
 


About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 22:44
Sexta-feira, 08 / 11 / 19

The Science of Sensation-Seeking: Why Some People Love Risky and Scary Stuff

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

November 7th, 2019.

 
sensation-seeking.
 
 


Are you the sort of person that loves horror films? Or do you hide behind a cushion at the scary parts? Psychologists call the behaviour of people who love scary movies sensation-seeking. But what draws some of us to risky and scary stuff and not others?
 
The Science of Sensation-Seeking
 
I remember I have always loved scary movies. From a young age, I would beg my parents to let me stay up late to watch Dracula films or the old Hammer House of Horror movies. There was one in particular – The Abominable Dr Phibes – starring the Prince of Horror – Vincent Price, which absolutely terrified me.
 
In the film, Dr Phibes used various tortuous means to kill off his enemies. In one, he drilled a hole in the ceiling of the bedroom of a drugged victim, poured honey through the hole and then let locusts loose to devour her face.
 
That night, I slept with a blanket over my head. In another gruesome scene, he attended a masked ball. He fixed a frog mask so that when it snapped shut it continued to keep closing, eventually snapping the neck of the victim.
 
I was around 10 when I watched these films. Despite pleading with mum and dad and them giving in, I would have dreadful nightmares after watching scary films. Every night, I would beg to watch another horror film.
 
One night, I was absolutely terrified so I kept the light on and played music all night. But still, I kept watching.
 
So, can science explain this morbid fascination with my constant needing to frighten myself? Well, yes. Psychologists call it sensation-seeking. Furthermore, there are two ways people become sensation seekers, nature and nurture.
 
Some people are born with a lower fear threshold
 
Fear comes from the most reptilian area in our brain – the amygdala. This is the oldest part that triggers the automatic fight or flight response. When this happens, our heart beats faster, adrenaline courses through our bodies, and our breathing becomes rapid and shallow.
 
Now, for some of us, these symptoms are excruciating. In fact, just one episode of a fight or flight response or panic attack can lead to a lifelong phobia.
 
However, other people are not affected. You could say that they have a higher tolerance for fear. As a result, they tend to seek out sensations that cause these feelings in their bodies. So people that favour extreme sports like sky diving or bungee jumping are seeking these extreme fear sensations to get the same effect normal people do.
 
Can you experience fear and pleasure at the same time?
 
The ‘nature’ answer would explain why it is possible for some people to experience positive and negative emotions at the same time.
 
Initially, experts believed that some people enjoy feeling scared because of the relief at the end. As humans, we are programmed to seek out pleasure and avoid pain at any cost. As such, it is not feasible for us to experience a negative experience as a positive one.
 
But studies show that sensations seekers are ‘happy to be unhappy’. It all depends on the situation. For example, if we feel safe enough, i.e. watching a film, or riding a roller-coaster, we can relax and revel in the horror.
 
“When individuals who typically choose to avoid the stimuli were embedded in a protective frame of mind, such that there was sufficient psychological disengagement or detachment, they experienced positive feelings while still experiencing fearfulness.” Study authors – Eduardo B. Andrade and Joel B. Cohen
 
Sensation-seekers are not psychopaths
 
This detachment is very important. Before all you non-sensation-seeking folks start labelling us as psychopaths, let me tell you about one interesting study.
 
This study (McCauley, et al, 1994) conducted research on disgust. Real-life documentaries depicting actual horrors were shown to college students. In graphic detail, cows were stunned, killed and slaughtered. A live monkey’s head was struck with a hammer and its brain offered up as a meal. The final video showed the facial skin of child peeled back for surgery. 90% of the students turned off the video before it had finished.
 
Yet, these same individuals would pay good money to watch a gory horror film with much more horror and violence than depicted on the videos. The researchers concluded that the students knew the films were fiction.
 
Therefore, they had a psychological barrier between the horror action and themselves. The fiction allowed them a distance. As a result, they are detached and in control. And it is this sense of fiction that gives us the freedom to seek this sensation of fear.
 
“In fact, there is evidence that young viewers who perceive greater realism in horror films are more negatively affected by their exposure to horror films than viewers who perceive the film as unreal (Hoekstra, Harris, & Helmick, 1999).”
 
Some people learn to seek out fear
 
So that’s the nature explanation, but what about nurture? Can we learn sensation-seeking behaviour? Experts think we can, and I can relate to this.
 
Growing up, I didn’t have a great relationship with my mother. She was cold and distant throughout my childhood. But, the one thing she loved was horror films. Perhaps something in me, even at a young age, knew that I could bond with her if we watched them together. Even though they scared me to death, watching them together did create a sense of closeness.
 
“I once had a client who shared with me that when they were young they used to watch scary movies alongside their mother, and this made them feel safe and that sometimes they even laughed together at the scary scenes,” Kelley Hopkins-Alvarez, a licensed professional counsellor.
 
Studies show it is how you feel afterwards is important. For example, if you watch a scary film with friends and then laugh about it, then that is what you take away from the experience. Not the scary parts of the movie. You’ll remember the friendship parts.
 
This is because our bodies remain in a heightened aroused state. As a result, emotions are intensified. Our friendships seem more intense. Consequently, our experiences after the scary event are cemented in our brains as positive.
 
On the other hand, if our experiences are negative, we will associate this negative feeling with the scary film.
 
Final Thoughts
 
People like to watch scary films for many different reasons. Sometimes we just like what we like and there’s no explanation. For me, it taps into my fascination with the dark triad and evil people. All I know that I will always be a fan of the horror film. And the scarier, the better!
 
References:
 
Janey Davies
 


About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

Archives:



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 02:25
Domingo, 03 / 11 / 19

Why Do Psychopath Traits in Males Seem So Attractive to Women?

Janey Davies.

https://www.learning-mind.com

November 3rd, 2019.

 
psychopath traits in males.
 
 


 
 
We all love a bad boy, right? They are the exciting, unpredictable, alluring and mysterious men that we find attractive. I mean, who wants a cardigan and slippers guy when you can be swept off your feet by a charming seducer? But hang on a minute, what’s so wrong with a lovely, caring man? Someone who will cherish and protect you? A man who puts your needs first and above their own? Why is that considered boring to some women? Why do we find psychopath traits in males so alluring?
 
Origins of Psychopath Traits in Males
 
Bad Boys in Films
 
Hollywood has played on the bad boy image for decades. Actually, you only have to think back to Clark Cable in ‘Gone with the Wind‘, James Dean in ‘Rebel Without a Cause‘ and Marlon Brando in ‘A Streetcar Named Desire‘.
 
Fast forward to today and our modern-day equivalents include Mads Mikkelsen as Hannibal Lecter, Tom Hiddleston as Loki or Christian Bale as Patrick Bateman. Or in fact, anyone playing James Bond.
 
Similarly, actors with a bad boy image are equally as interesting. Oliver Reed, Robert Downey Jr, Colin Farrell, Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, Johnny Depp, and Mark Wahlberg. So what is it about these dark traits that women find attractive?
 
First Contact
 
Psychopaths are charming, persuasive and manipulative. Therefore, we are charmed when we first meet one. Likewise, psychopaths make us feel special. Their attention is excessive. We bathe in their spotlight. These exciting individuals have chosen us mere mortals to shine their attention on. We are the chosen ones and feel special.
 
Then they withdraw. They disappear for days. We have lost this contact. Then this special feeling turns into despair, longing, and withdrawal. And this where it gets interesting. It is this withdrawal that keeps us hooked, literally and psychologically.
 
The continual giving and withdrawing attention is what attracts us. In fact, it strengthens our feelings and makes males with psychopath traits seem even more attractive.
Studies Reveal Why We Find Males with Psychopath Traits Attractive
 
If you are one of the people thinking this is ridiculous, it might help to think of how the brain copes with withdrawal. It’s all to do with dopamine and the pleasure centre in the brain.
 
Dopamine and Withdrawal
 
When we engage in positive experiences, dopamine floods into our brain. Dopamine is the happy hormone. It is released whenever we eat delicious food, have great sex, receive amazing compliments, or get positive attention.
 
If these experiences are repeated and reinforced, this neurotransmitter then makes connections. It creates reward circuits. These circuits make automatic associations in our brains. They instantly flare up when we anticipate a particular behaviour or person.
 
However, studies have shown that dopamine works best when the reinforcements are intermittent. When the experiences are constant, the dopamine does not flow as well. This is the ‘frustration-attraction’ dilemma. It means that obstacles in the relationship are actually fuelling the attraction.
 
As a result, our brains are programmed to find men with psychopath traits attractive. Simply because their behaviour is unpredictable.
 
“The point about bad boys is that they’re not all bad. When they’re charming, they’re very, very charming. Their goodness becomes an addiction.” Virginia Ironside, The Independent Agony Aunt
 
Psychopaths are not capable of focusing their attention on others. By their very nature, their narcissism and self-centredness won’t allow them to put others first. They are masters of frustration-attraction.
  • Psychopath Traits in Males Include:
  • Lack of empathy
  • Selfishness
  • Narcissism
  • Self-centred
  • Impulsive
  • Risky behaviour
  • Parasitic
  • Insincerity
  • Duplicity
 
Consequently, we are left, much like a drug addict, searching for our next hit. We are desperate for time with our toxic partner. This is because our brain has made an association with the unsuitable partner.
 
When we think about them, we get a pang of withdrawal. We need our dopamine rush. This keeps us invested in the relationship. Whether it is good for us or not.
 
Sexual Attraction
 
 
In another study, 128 female undergraduates were given two descriptions of male characters; men with Dark Triads and a control. The study included high psychopath traits in males taken from the Psychopathy Scale III, the Narcissistic Personality Inventory and the Mach-IV.
 
 
High Psychopath Male Traits include:
  • Manipulation
  • Deceit
  • Lack of remorse
  • Desire for attention
  • No morality
  • Charming others
  • Cynicism
  • Need for prestige
 
The traits in the study did not include the dark psychopath traits in males.
 
Participants had to rate the attractiveness on a scale of 1-6. The results showed that the females found dark traits more attractive than the control. But why?
Sexual Selection
 
The first reason is sexual selection. Researchers believe that the higher psychopath dark traits in males indicate a ‘masculine quality‘ unique to male sexuality. For example, traits like confidence, risk-taking and charm. These are all associated with sexual prowess.
 
In fact, these particular dark traits are linked to increased sexual activity and success in males. There is a connection between one-night stands and this type of male.
 
Sexual Conflict
 
The second reason is sexual conflict. Women find men who can sell themselves especially attractive. These are the charmers and the manipulators. The ones that can keep you hooked over time. These types don’t necessarily score highly when it comes to sexual prowess. However, they do manage to maintain multiple partners.
 
Final Thoughts
 
Males with psychopath traits might attract us in the first instance. However, studies do show that women find altruistic males more attractive in the long term. So while you might be instantly drawn to that bad boy, the chances are you will end up marrying the good guy.
 
 
Janey Davies



About the Author: Janey Davies.
Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
 
COPYRIGHT © 2019 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 

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No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 




 

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publicado por achama às 20:32
Segunda-feira, 08 / 07 / 19

Dreaming about an Ex: 6 Meanings That Might Surprise You. ~ Janey Davies.

Dreaming about an Ex: 

6 Meanings That Might Surprise You.

By Janey Davies.

July 6th, 2019.

 
 

 



 

Dreaming about an ex can be unsettling, particularly for those in abusive relationships. But can they offer insight into our daily lives?
You might wonder how a dream about an ex-partner can shed light on what’s happening in our day-to-day life. For example, what does it mean for those who are in happy relationships? On the other hand, what about people that are single? How is dreaming about a past ex-partner relevant to our present?
Well, you could argue that we all made up of our past experiences. The things that happened to us when we were younger have shaped us into the people we are today. But clearly, if we are dreaming about an ex-partner, then something is not quite right. But what exactly?

Why do we dream?

Freud believed that dreams are a window into the subconscious mindHe argued that we all have hidden desires, wishes and thoughts that we feel ashamed to voice out loud. As a result, we bury all these hidden desires and they fester in the subconscious. Dreams allow us to process these desires in a healthy manner.
Every dream is unique to us. It is packed full of our own experiences and emotions. Each dream contains symbols and clues that give us hints as to what our subconscious mind is trying to tell us.
There are some would argue that the fact we are dreaming about an ex is irrelevant. However, our subconscious mind has chosen an ex-partner because it believes this is the perfect way to tell us about a particular problem that needs attention.
So, what can we learn about dreams that feature an ex-partner?

Dreaming about an Ex: 6 Meanings and Interpretations

 

1. Unresolved issues

 
I often dream about a certain ex-partner and I believe this is because of unresolved issues between myself and my ex. We were together for ten years and broke up over 18 years ago. However, of all my ex-partners, he is the one I dream about the most.
He was a very controlling person who was jealous all the time. I was a flirtatious person who was probably not the best match for him. The relationship ended very badly.
When I’m dreaming about my ex, I am living in his house and he is not there, but I know he will come back at any time. I think this represents the fear and anxiety I used to feel in our relationship when he would look around for things I had done wrong so he could punish me.
If you are dreaming about your ex, consider whether you have unresolved issues as well. Was the break-up difficult? Do you feel cheated because you didn’t get your share of the house or other possessions?

2. Symbolic of other problems

 
Dreams are symbolic. Many people worry that because they have dreamt of an ex they subconsciously want them back, but that’s not the case. Exes are exes for a reason. Whether it was your decision to break up or not.
Think about why the relationship ended. Was it you that finished it and why? Do you regret it? What could you have done differently if you do regret it?
Even if you didn’t end it, think about how you can prevent the same thing from happening in the future. If your dream about your ex is recurring, then understanding why your relationship ended and what you can do in the future may put a stop to these ongoing dreams.

3. You are missing a part of your life with the ex

 
Our partners are so much more than that person. They are a lifestyle, a circle of friends, an extended family, even an income bracket.
When I split up with my ex, I found out very quickly that surviving on a civil servant salary was a huge change compared to a joint income with my ex. I went from living in a four-bedroomed house in a lovely little village to renting one room in a shared house in the city centre.
Now, my situation is different and I’m very happy, and yet I still dream of my ex. Perhaps I am resentful that he still owns that lovely house in the village? I hope not. But it’s something to be aware of.
Remember, dreaming about an ex doesn’t mean you are missing your ex, it could be the house you lived in, the area, the mutual friends you had, or all the things you did together.

4. Your ex represents a part of you

 
There is a theory that your ex represents a part of you that you might be neglecting. For example, if your ex-partner was particularly loving and you are in a relationship at present, consider your behaviour with your current partner.
Are you being as warm and as caring as you should be? Could your dream about your ex be a wake-up call about your current relationship?
The best way to analyse this dream is to look at your ex-partner’s best or worst qualities and see whether you are either replicating them or you need to pay attention to the ones you are lacking.

4. A chance to forgive

 
In life, we don’t always get the opportunity for closure. People can walk away without giving explanations about their behaviour. Or, they can act inappropriately without facing the consequences.
It can leave us with unfinished business. We can’t move on. However, our dreams allow us to process these unresolved issues.
In our dreams, it doesn’t matter whether your ex feels sorry for causing you upset and pain. You have the to power to forgive and make peace with the situation.
In fact, if you keep having dreams about your ex, forgiving them while you are awake might stop you dreaming about them when you’re asleep. Only then will you be able to move on.

6. There is something lacking in your current partner

 
If the dream about your ex was your first love and you are in a relationship, this is a sign that you feel something is missing in your current relationship.
Our first love reminds us of passion, our youth, and the excitement of being in love for the first time. Therefore, if you are dreaming of your first ex-partner, it is your subconscious nudging you to regain these feelings with your present partner.
Dreaming about an ex has all kinds of meanings and interpretations. The main point to remember is that it doesn’t have to mean you still have feelings for an ex-partner.
If you keep dreaming about an ex, it’s more likely that your subconscious is using this to tell you about an issue that needs resolving right now.
References:
  1. www.bustle.com
  2. www.thecut.com
 
 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

About the Author: Janey Davies.

Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 



Archives:


 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


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https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

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publicado por achama às 05:35
Quinta-feira, 04 / 07 / 19

Dark Forest Theory and the Creepy Reason Why We Haven’t Found Aliens ~ Janey Davies.

Dark Forest Theory 

and the Creepy Reason Why We Haven’t Found Aliens.

By Janey Davies.

July 3rd, 2019.

dark forest theory
 

 



 

There are many theories that try to explain why we haven’t made contact with aliens, but the Dark Forest Theory is the most terrifying of all.
It suggests the reason why we haven’t heard from aliens is that they are deliberately keeping quiet.
 
The Search for Alien Life
The search for extra-terrestrial life captivates human beings. We make films and write books about it. We spend billions of dollars on equipment designed to listen and emit signals into the depths of the universe.
But as of yet, outer space has remained resolutely silent. But how is this possible? In the observable universe alone there are approximately 10 billion galaxies. Within each one of these galaxies are around100 billion stars, just like our own sun.
Even according to esteemed astronomer Frank Drake, it is inconceivable that aliens have not made contact yet. The Drake Equation estimates that there should be around 20 alien civilisations close enough to Earth to have been detected.
So why haven’t we found alien life if the odds are so stacked for there being life in the universe? More to the point, why is the Dark Forest Theory so scary?
Astronomer Martin Dominik alludes to the theory in an interview with The Times. He is discussing the plan by the US to broadcast a powerful radio message to a nearby star:
“Maybe,” he said, without humour, “they will come and eat us.”
But before we start fashioning ‘End of the World’ placards, let’s look at other theories why humans have not made contact with aliens.

3 Theories about Alien Existence

 

1. The Fermi Paradox

The Fermi Paradox is named after physicist, Enrico Fermi. It asks: ‘If there are billions of stars in billions of galaxies, then why haven’t we seen aliens?
There are reasonable explanations:
  • There is alien life on other planets but they haven’t got the technology to reach us yet.
  • They don’t want to visit us.
  • They have already been to Earth but at a time when humans were not on the planet.
  • Alien civilisations have only recently acquired the technology to travel through space.

2. Catch 22

For aliens to visit Earth, they have to live on another planet. However, life on other planets is extremely rare. Earth is truly a one-off, a miracle planet. It lies on the Goldilocks zone of just the right temperatures situated away from the sun.
In fact, it’s fair to say that the default state of the universe is a dead, silent, vacuum. It is totally devoid of any life. And this is where the Catch-22 comes in. For a planet to be habitable, it first has to become inhabited.
The reason for that is that the organisms that live on the planet change the atmosphere. Plants give off oxygen and take in carbon dioxide. Organisms do the opposite. You can’t have one without the other. Earth is the exception to the rule in the universe. That is why we haven’t encountered aliens – because there aren’t any.

3. We haven’t waited long enough

Human beings have been listening for and sending out signals for about 100 years. The universe itself is nearly 14 billion years old and extends 92 billion light years in diameter. We really are being incredibly impatient.
At present, we have listened to an area well under 1% of our galaxy alone. Actually, astrophysics experts from Cornell University advise it may well be 1,500 years before we have scanned enough of the Milky Way before we hear from extra-terrestrials.
 

The Dark Forest Theory

So why is the Dark Forest Theory so frightening? Because it suggests that there is alien life out there, but it is hostile. In fact, it is staying silent for a reason. The reason is this killer alien species wants to end human civilisation on Earth and take the planet for its own species.
If you think this is a storyline best suited for a Hollywood blockbuster, you only have to look back at our own history.
When explorers set foot on the new unchartered territory, they do not acclimatise themselves with the local people. In fact, if they consider themselves to be more civilised, they take over the land and the rights of the indigenous people.

Here are three reasons why experts believe in the Dark Forest Theory:

Survival of the fittest

 
All living creatures have an innate drive to live and to survive. Whether they are a human, animal, fish, bird, or alien. If one species cannot communicate effectively with another, and they don’t know their intentions, it is prudent to eliminate them first.
  • Limited resources in the universe
We already know the Earth is a rare planet in the universe. How many science-fiction moviesfeature plotlines where aliens attack because their planet is dying and they need our resources?
  • Other civilisations are keeping quiet to survive
Astronomer Dominik believes the reason we have not made contact with life in outer space is simple. The more advanced civilisations are hiding from hostile aliens.
Which begs the question, should we be trying to make contact if we don’t really know what’s out there? There are some astronomers that would prefer to keep a much lower profile and take the ‘wait and see’ approach.
However, the problem remains that just about anyone can send a message into space. In fact, in 2008, the manufacturers of Doritos blasted a 30-second advert towards Ursa Major.
What are your thoughts? Wait and see or shout loudly and hope someone visits?
“Some say (alien contact) is the greatest thing we should do. Some think we should be very quiet and this should be the last thing we should do — and it might indeed be the last thing we will do.”
– Dominik
References:
  1. bigthink.com
  2. nasa.gov

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

About the Author: Janey Davies.

Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 



Archives:


 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 


 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 22:27
Sábado, 29 / 06 / 19

The Bandwagon Effect: How It Affects Your Decisions without You Knowing

The Bandwagon Effect: How It Affects Your Decisions without You Knowing.

By Janey Davies.

June 28th, 2019.

 
 

 



 

We all like to think we are completely unbiased when we make decisions, but, actually, there are a number of things that influence us. One of them is the Bandwagon Effect.

What is the Bandwagon Effect?

The Bandwagon Effect is a psychological cognitive bias in which people do, say or believe something, despite their own beliefs because they see others doing it. Therefore, it must be right.

Where did it originate?

Nowadays, the saying is most associated with politics, consumer behaviour and the stock market. But where did it come from?
Most of us have heard of ‘jumping on the bandwagon’, which suggests joining or supporting others in something that’s likely to have a favourable outcome. What you might not know is where this phrase originated from.
In the 19-century, performing bands played on carts during carnivals and street parades. These were called bandwagons. As the band played and the wagon went from street to street, the musicians encouraged people to jump on the bandwagon so they could carry on listening to the music as they played.
It wasn’t until 1848, however, that the phrase ‘jump on the bandwagon’ came about during the presidential campaign of US senator Zachary Taylor. Dan Rice was a clown campaigning for Taylor and while promoting him he encouraged potential voters to ‘jump on the bandwagon’ to show support for Taylor.
At the same time, he suggested that anyone who wasn’t on it was missing out on the fun. His campaign was ultimately successful. Zachary Taylor became the US president in 1849.

Examples of the Bandwagon Effect:

  • Facebook post has a lot of ‘likes’, so it gets even more.
  • An item of clothing becomes fashionable because lots of people start wearing it.
  • A beauty product sells out because everyone wants it.
  • Stocks soar as people invest in a particular company.
  • A political party is performing well in the polls and gets increased support.
  • You start a new diet because everyone else is on it.

How does the Bandwagon Effect affect us?

Herd mentality

“Collective fear stimulates herd instinct, and tends to produce ferocity toward those who are not regarded as members of the herd.”  ― Bertrand Russell
Herd mentality is another name for people following the same patterns of behaviour. Examples of this are queuing up all night for the latest Apple smartphone, parents having to buy the must-have toy for Christmas, and Black Friday. These are relatively harmless examples of a herd mentality, but when can the effects become dangerous?
In 2008, the US housing market crashed. When it became obvious that many homeowners would not be able to pay their mortgages, investors, instead of remaining calm, went into a herd mentality and panicked. Once a few starting selling shares, the rest quickly followed which led to one of the biggest financial disasters in US history.

Manipulation

No one likes to admit that they are being manipulated, but we look for validation of our beliefs every day. For instance, when you go to book a holiday, you might go on TripAdvisor, when you buy a product online, you may read the customer reviews. Even something as innocuous as watching a film, we’ll check out the rating and it will influence our choice.
So is this manipulation or being selective? Well, it depends. Studies have shown that we’ll pay more for a product if other people recommend it.

Voting

We all like to think we are on the winning side when it comes to voting for a candidate. Studiesshow that voters who are undecided are more likely to vote for who is ‘expected to win’. This is a clear case of the bandwagon effect.
But the media also plays a huge role in influencing society. Whoever controls the media can decide whether they want to give a candidate positive or negative coverage. Once a politician has the popular vote, it is easy to skim over our rational thoughts. They have the backing of the nation and the majority of voters, and the majority of us can’t be wrong, surely?

Fear and the Need for Belonging

Why is it so hard to escape this particular cognitive bias? Because we all want to belong and that’s why it is important to align ourselves with a group. Outsiders don’t do well in society. They get singled out, bullied, made fun of and isolated.
Studies have shown that as a result, teenagers are most susceptible to the bandwagon effect and it’s not surprising when you consider how much they want to fit in. As we get older, we grow in confidence. We become more assured of our beliefs and we feel able to confront those who don’t share the same ideologies as us.
Of course, there is another reason and that is that we all like to think we are right. And when we join likeminded people on our particular bandwagon, it reassures us that we are on the right path. Moreover, once we have formulated an opinion, either side of an argument, we’ll find everything we can to support that opinion. Whether it’s facts, reviews or people.
So is it possible to avoid this effect or are we destined to remain on the bandwagon? There are ways we can stop jumping on one in the first place.

How to Avoid the Bandwagon Effect

  • Take some time before you make a decision.
  • Get feedback from other sources and compare your results.
  • Make decisions on your own, away from people that share similar views to you.
  • Think about alternative views.
  • Put yourself in the other person’s situation.
  • Try and take emotion out of the scenario.
We all like to think we exercise free will over our actions. Perhaps with a little forethought and knowledge, we will be able to in future.
 
References:
  1. Medium.com
 
 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

About the Author: Janey Davies.

Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 



Archives:


 
 



No religious or political creed is advocated here.

Organised religion is unnecessary to spirituality.

Excellent teachings of the masters have been contaminated by the dogmatic control of these religions.

Discernment yes; judgement does not.
If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 

With discernment it is possible to reach the spirit of the letter of any writing and it is also much easier to listen to the voice of the soul that comes from the heart.
Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 


Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.
 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/



 

Like this! please bookmark. It is updated daily

 

 
 
 
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publicado por achama às 07:47
Terça-feira, 25 / 06 / 19

How to Practice Modern Stoicism and Why It Will Make You Happier ~ Janey Davies.

How to Practice Modern Stoicism and Why It Will Make You Happier.

By Janey Davies.

June 25th, 2019.

 
 

 



 

Just one glance at the internet and you’ll be deluged with posts promising to reveal the secrets of everlasting happiness. But actually, there is no mystery to being happy, and modern stoicism can show you why.
The word stoic suggests a longsuffering, patient, tolerant person that bears their burden without complaint. However, to imply that this is the route to happiness would be completely wrong. The theory behind modern stoicism is simple.

What Is Modern Stoicism?

In life, we cannot control everything so we should focus on the things we can and accept what we cannot change.
Modern stoicism originates from the Stoics who were ancient philosophers living in Greece. These wise men argued that in order to live happier lives we should decide what things we can change and what we cannot.
Once we have distinguished between the two, we can work at changing what is within our power to do so. Then it is easier to accept what we cannot change as part of life. This might sound like airy-fairy nonsense, but it does make a lot of sense when you consider what is actually under our control.
What can’t we control?
  • What people think of us.
  • Our own bodies.
  • The environment
  • What people do.
What can we control?
  • How we think about all of the above.
  • What judgments we make about those thoughts.

There are two basic principles:

We can’t control everything in life. All we can control is how we think about what happens and the judgments we make, based on these thoughts. And this is where it gets interesting. The ancient Greeks believed that it is not actual things that cause us unhappiness but how we think about them.
When something happens, we make a judgment about it. If we think the thing is bad, we feel upset or angry or grief. It all depends on what the thing is, on how we have perceived and judged it. However, this same thing might not upset another person, indeed, it might even be a joyous event for someone else.
For example, take a World Cup final. The winning team’s fans will be rejoicing. The losers will feel real pain and grief. If you’re not interested in football, you won’t be affected at all.
So, the important thing to remember is that whatever judgment we add to our thoughts gives the thing value. Moreover, it is this value that produces our emotion. The good thing is that we have control over these judgments. Whatever happens, whether it is good or bad, we can decide what value we assign to them. That value will then affect our emotions.
Likewise, this emotion can be happiness or sadness or anything we choose to feel. So while we may have no control over what happens to us, we do have complete control over how we feel about what happens to us. Consequently, we are in control of our happiness.

So how does stoicism work in the modern world?

 

Figure out what’s really important

 
Many people lust after wealth, fame, power, status, but the reality is that few of us are going to attain these things. As a result, a lot of us are going to end up miserable because we haven’t achieved these goals. So why do we value these things? At the end of the day, most of us just want to be comfortable, healthy, have good friends and no stresses or worries.
Consider why you want these meaningless trappings? Is it to impress other people? Perhaps the media tells you that in order to be happy, you have to have the fastest car, the nicest watch, the latest designer dress. Do what makes you happy, not what others tell you.

It’s not about self-belief or positive thinking

 
Consider this scenario; you’ve decided to scale Mount Everest. You’re setting off with no strategy, equipment, guides and you’re unfit. Now, no amount of self-belief or positive thinking is going to get you to the top of that mountain. Modern stoicism is about setting realistic goals that are right for you and that are achievable.
You hear a lot of stories of successful business people where determination and positive thinking was the key to their success. They never gave up and it was their dogged self-belief that spurred them on. But when you consider that 9 out of 10 start-ups fail, it’s obviously not about believing in yourself. It’s about getting the right idea in the first place.

Distinguish whether the situation is under your control or not

 
If something is starting to bother you, try and distinguish whether it is one of those things that’s under your control or not. Think about this as a line that divides the actions of anything that’s out of your control on one side, and your thoughts about those actions on the other side. Then whatever is bothering you, place it either side of the line. Now, you’ve distinguished which one it is, is there anything you can do about it?
For example, a shop assistant is rude to you in the store. You immediately feel angry, but you can’t control the assistant’s actions. Perhaps they are busy and under stress? What you can dois complain about their behaviour to their manager, or you can ask them to explain their rude behaviour.
By dividing what you can control and can’t takes the pressure off you. It removes emotion from situations. It’s actually very freeing. It’s not about letting people off the hook for being rude or aggressive, it’s more about living your life without the pressure of feeling responsible for everything that happens in the world.
My final point is that if you want to start practising modern stoicism, every morning, think about the day ahead, the possible traps you might encounter. Just be ready for them and remember that you can’t control everything, but you can control how you feel about things.
 
References:
  1. http://www.bbc.com
  2. https://www.independent.co.uk
 

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

About the Author: Janey Davies.

Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



Compiled by http://violetflame.biz.ly from: 



Archives:


 
 



Please respect all credits.

 
Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


More @ http://violetflame.biz.ly and 
https://rayviolet.blogspot.com/




 

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publicado por achama às 21:12
Sexta-feira, 21 / 06 / 19

14 Origins of Phrases You Probably Use Every Day but Had No Idea about ~ Janey Davies.

14 Origins of Phrases You Probably Use Every Day but Had No Idea about.

By Janey Davies.

June 21st, 2019.

 
 

 



 

Have you ever walked into a tiny room and thought ‘I couldn’t swing a cat in here?’ Have you ever ‘rubbed someone up the wrong way?’ These are examples of phrases we use all the time, but do you know their origins?
I love words. I love metaphors, words that come from foreign languages, I love how words shape our minds, how we use them to influence people, they’re just so powerful.
Lately, I’ve been looking into the origins of phrases and have found some really interesting ones I thought I’d share with you. I hope you find them as fascinating as I did.

14 Little-Known Origins of Popular Phrases

Not enough room to swing a cat

 
1. A very small space
This is a nautical term and derives from a ‘cat-o-nine-tails’, a whip used to punish sailors onboard ships. Sailors would usually receive punishment below decks. However, quarters were cramped, hence the saying, ‘no room to swing the cat‘.

Rubbing someone up the wrong way

 
2. To irritate or annoy
In America in the 16-century, slaves had many tasks to carry out. One was to rub the wooden floors of their master’s houses, first with a wet cloth, then with a dry one. If they went against the natural grain, it looked unsightly and annoyed the master.

Lost your bottle

 
3. Cowardly behaviour
You’ll never guess where this phrase originates from. It comes from bare-knuckle fighters in the 20-century and their bottle men.
Each fighter had their own bottle man to provide them with water between rounds.  Managers with poor fighters would instruct the bottle man to disappear. This would stop the fight. ‘Lost your bottle man’ was eventually shortened to ‘lost your bottle’.

Let your hair down

 
4. To relax
In Parisian society, it was the done thing to have an elaborate hair-do. These hairdos took hours to achieve so at the end of the evening it was a huge relief to let them down.

Take the upper hand

 
5. To gain an advantage
This phrase originates from the 15-century and comes from a game involving two or more people and a long stick. The first person places their hand on the stick at the bottom, the next person places their hand just above and so on until the last person to reach the top of the stick wins. They have the upper hand.

Rule of thumb

 
6. A broad principle
In the 17-century, an English judge ruled that British men could legally beat their wives with a stick, so long as the stick was less than the width of the husband’s thumb.

Blackmail

 
7. To demand money by threats
This is one of those phrases you’d never guess the origins unless perhaps you are Scottish. It originated in the Scottish Highlands in the 16-century.
In those days, ‘mail’ was an old word which meant rent. Farmers paid rent in silver coins. The rent was known as ‘white mail’. Certain clans started racketeering in the farming areas. They threatened farmers with violence then offered them protection but only if they paid. Farmers called this extra payment ‘black-mail’.

Saved by the bell

 
8. Rescue from an unwanted situation
Before advances in modern medicine and technology, it was quite common for doctors to pronounce people dead. The problem was, these people were not dead and some were being buried alive.
Fear spread amongst towns and cities. Stories passed around of gravediggers hearing screams from below the ground at night. To combat the problem, a special coffin was made with a bell that could be rung from inside that would alert people above ground. Hence, ‘saved by the bell‘.

You’re fired!

 
9. Given the sack
No, this phrase does not have its origins in the Whitehouse or anywhere near Donald Trump. It’s much older than that. It’s a mining term.
A miner caught stealing would have his tools burned or ‘fired’. It meant he couldn’t work anywhere. It was so effective a punishment that other trades adopted the phrase.

Get the sack

 
10. Lose your job
Speaking of getting the sack, that’s another one of our phrases that has unusual origins. Today, getting the sack has unpleasant connotations, but in actual fact, in the past, it was a positive sign.
Centuries ago, craftsmen and labourers would expect to work on a job for a few days or a week at most. They would carry their tools in a sack, which the owner would stash for them for safekeeping. The sacks were returned when the labourer finished the job. They got their sack back.

Spill the beans

11. To reveal a secret
This is another one of those phrases that you’ll never guess its origins in a million years. In ancient Greece, people voted in elections using beans. If they liked a candidate, they used a white bean. If they disapproved, they would place a black bean in the container.
If these containers were knocked over, everyone could see how the voting was going. Therefore, if someone ‘spilled the beans‘, the secret was out.

Kicking the bucket

 
12. Dying
You might not use this phrase after you learn of its origins. In slaughterhouses, when cows are killed, a bucket is placed underneath it to catch the blood when it dies. Sometimes, the cow’s legs would kick the bucket when it died.

Let the cat out of the bag

13. Reveal a secret
Back in medieval times, the marketplace was rife with tricksters and fraudsters. One such deception was the sale of suckling pigs. Once the pig was purchased, the hapless buyer would be distracted by the seller.
The pig would then be swapped for a cat and which was placed in the bag, ready for the customer. The customer would only realise when he ‘let the cat out of the bag’.

Cold Feet

 
14. Lose your nerve
German writer Fritz Reuter was the first person to use this phrase. Interestingly, Reuter uses the term in each of his books.
In the first, ‘An Old Story of My Farming Days’, he uses it to describe a poker player to wants to leave the game with his winnings intact. The poker player complains he has ‘cold feet’ and manages to leave without causing upset to the other players.  In the other, ‘Seed-time and Harvest’, it involves a joke made by a shoemaker.
Do you have any interesting phrases or words you’d like to share? Even better, do you know their origins? Let us know!
 
References:
  1. https://www.buzzfeed.com
  2. https://list25.com

 

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

About the Author: Janey Davies.

Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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publicado por achama às 19:31
Terça-feira, 18 / 06 / 19

What Is Change Blindness and How It Affects You without Your Awareness

What Is Change Blindness and How It Affects You without Your Awareness.

By Janey Davies.

June 18th, 2019.

 
 

 



 

I was watching an episode of Air Crash Investigation the other day and investigators stated that the cause of a fatal aeroplane crash was change blindness.
My ears pricked up. I thought I’d heard of every psychological trait in the book, but I’d never come across this one. What on earth was it and how could it have caused two experienced pilots to make terrible errors in the cockpit that lead to the deaths of their passengers?
I had to find out. So what are the basics behind change blindness?

What Is Change Blindness?

Basically, it is when something we are looking at changes without us noticing. But how can it happen? We all like to think that we have a keen eye for what’s going on around us. We are natural observers. People watchers. We see things. We notice stuff. If something has changed, we can tell.
Well, actually, that’s not quite true. Studies show that if we are distracted for long enough, then our focus fails. Even more surprisingly, the change can be huge and we still won’t see it. So how does it happen?
“Change blindness is a failure to detect that an object has moved or disappeared and is the opposite of change detection.” Eysenck and Keane

The Experiments

Focused Attention

This infamous study has been replicated many different times. In the original one, participants watched a video of six people and had to count how many times the ones wearing white tee-shirts passed a basketball to each other.
During this time, a woman entered the scene in a gorilla suit, stared at the camera, banged on her chest then walked away. Half the participants didn’t see the gorilla.
It appears that if we focus on one task we cannot see other things.
Focusing our Attention Limits our Resources
Our brains can only manage so much information at a time. Therefore, it has to prioritise and limit what it deems to be unnecessary.
This is why we can’t feel the clothes we are wearing, or as you are reading these words now, you are not aware of noises from outside. Of course, now I’ve mentioned them you are now beginning to pay them more attention.
However, our attention span is limited. This means whatever we focus on has to be carefully chosen. Typically, that one thing we do pay attention to gets all our attention. In fact, to the detriment of everything else. As a result, we miss out on large swathes of detail because of our laser-like focus on the one area.

Blocked Vision

In this study, a researcher talks to a participant. While they are talking two men walk between them carrying a door. The door blocks the view of the researcher and the participant.
While this is happening, the researcher swaps places with one of the men carrying the door and once the door had passed then continues chatting to the participant as if nothing untoward has happened. Out of 15 participants, only 7 noticed the change.
If something blocks our view for just a few seconds, it is enough to distract us.
We use our past experiences to fill in the gaps
If we can’t see for a few moments our brain fills in the gap for us. Life flows, it doesn’t stop and start in jerks and jolts. This is our brain taking the shortest cut necessary in order to keep us surviving and performing quickly in our ever-changing world.
In all our past experiences, we haven’t come across someone changing into someone else so we presume it won’t happen today. We simply don’t expect to see a different person when the door has passed us. It doesn’t make sense so we don’t even entertain it as a possibility.

Losing Sight of a Person

In this study, participants watched a video of a student lounge. One female student leaves the room but has left her bag behind. Actor A appears and steals money from her bag. She leaves the room by turning a corner and walking out through the exit.
In the second scenario, Actor A turns the corner but then is replaced by Actor B (the viewers don’t see the replacing) they just see her exit. When 374 participants watched the change film, only 4.5% noticed the actor had changed.
If we lose our visual reference for a few seconds, we assume it will be the same when it reappears.
If the change doesn’t make sense to us, it is difficult to see
Changes are usually drastic, sudden, they catch our attention. Just think about sirens on emergency vehicles or someone acting suspiciously. We have a tendency to see things that change because they are usually moving in some way. They switch from a static nature to a mobile one.
But people don’t change into other people. Gorillas don’t just appear out of nowhere.  That’s why we miss things that are out of the ordinary. We just don’t expect people to change into other people.

How to Reduce the Effects of Change Blindness

  • Individuals are more likely to make this sort of mistake than people in groups.
  • Changes are easier to stop when objects are produced holistically. For example, a whole face rather than just the facial features.
  • Changes in the foreground are detected more easily than changes in the background.
  • Experts are more likely to notice changes in their own field of study.
  • Visual cues can help bring the focus back onto the object of attention.
As for the aeroplane in the programme? Eastern Airlines was due to land in Florida when a small bulb in the landing nosegear light failed in the cockpit. Despite the alarm warning, the pilots spent so much time trying to get it to work they failed to notice their altitude was seriously low until it was too late. They crashed into the Everglades. Tragically, 96 people died.
It’s not likely that we are going to be faced with the task of counting a basketball and miss a woman prancing around in a gorilla suit every day. But as the air crash programme has shown, this phenomena can have devastating effects.
References:
  1. https://www.verywellmind.com
  2. https://www.bbc.co.uk

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

About the Author: Janey Davies.

Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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publicado por achama às 19:57
Domingo, 16 / 06 / 19

What Is Introverted Thinking and How It Is Different from Extroverted One ~ Janey Davies.

What Is Introverted Thinking and How It Is Different from Extroverted One.

By Janey Davies.

June 15th, 2019.

 
 

 



 

Did you know that the Myers-Briggs Personality Theory uses our way of thinking to separate us into introverted and extroverted individuals?

If this is a surprise to you, then you’re not the only one. I thought the personality traits of introverts and extroverts extended only to external behaviour. For example, the way we act around others, whether we like social contact or whether we prefer to be left alone.
For instance, a typical introvert will tire easily in company and find solitude the best way to recharge their batteries. On the other hand, extroverts love to be the centre of attention and find alone time hard to deal with.
However, I didn’t realise that we could also think in an introverted or extroverted way. So what exactly is introverted thinking?
You might imagine that when we think, we do so in a kind of social and personal vacuum, but that’s far from the truth. Every experience, every connection, every person we’ve ever met colours our thinking process. As a result, when we think, we bring up all this knowledge and it shapes our thoughts.
So, it stands to reason that someone who is, by nature, more of an introverted person is not suddenly going to start thinking in an extroverted way. But it’s actually more complicated than that. There are very clear differences between introverted and extroverted thinking. And some you might not have thought of.

Differences between Introverted Thinking and Extroverted Thinking

Introverted Thinkers:

  • Focus on what’s in their head
  • Deep thinkers
  • Prefer concepts and theories
  • Good with solving problems
  • Use precise language
  • Natural followers
  • Get projects moving
  • Need to know how things work
Examples of Introverted Thinkers:
Albert Einstein, Charles Darwin, Larry Page (Co-founder of Google), Simon Cowell, Tom Cruise.
Introverted thinkers don’t mind mess and chaos because it allows them to sift through the mess to find answers. They like to analyse a situation before they make a decision.
They will gather all the necessary information they have on the subject, measure it carefully against what they already know, and see if it corresponds or not. Any new information gets stored for later use, anything that’s incorrect gets tossed.
They continue to work in this way, re-evaluating every situation until they are satisfied they have the right conclusion. Having said that, they are always open to new information because at the end of the day they want the truth.
They have an almost obsessive need to know how things work and, as a result, are renowned for coming up with new inventions. They understand complex theories which they can then use in the real world.

Extroverted Thinkers

  • Focus on the real world
  • Logical thinkers
  • Prefer facts and objectives
  • Good with planning and organising projects
  • Use commanding language
  • Natural leaders
  • Get people moving
  • Need to know how people work
Examples of Extroverted Thinkers
Julius Caesar, Napoleon Bonaparte, Martha Stewart, Judge Judy, Uma Thurman, Nancy Pelosi (US Speaker of the House).
Extroverted thinkers can’t stand mess. They are typically much-organised people who need to know where everything is before they can either start work or begin to relax. You won’t find an extrovert with a messy desk. Moreover, if you are messy and disorganised, just ask one to help you and you won’t ever regret it.
Extroverts are direct people and this applies to their approach to life. They won’t faff about. They make quick decisions, take the fastest route or skip lunch to make a meeting. They plan in advance, schedule appointments and know exactly when their train or bus is due to arrive.
Also, they stick with what they know and don’t like new information because it might mess up their carefully thought-out plans.

5 Signs You Might Be an Introverted Thinker

ISTPs & INTPs use introverted thinking.
  1. You don’t believe everything you read.
Do you find you are always fact-checking before you repost on Facebook? Did you question your tutors at school? Do you take things with a pinch of salt? These are all signs of introverted thinking.
  1. You like to take your time when making a decision
No one can accuse you of making rash decisions or acting on impulse. You won’t be rushed when it comes to important decisions.
  1. You’re not afraid of arguing your point of view.
Some people don’t like confrontation, but that’s not you. If you believe you are right, you’ll back yourself, even if it makes you unpopular.
  1. Sometimes you find it hard to explain your position
Just because it makes sense to you doesn’t mean it’s easy to tell someone else.
  1. You don’t follow normal societal routines
People that follow their own path, whether it’s getting up late and working until midnight, or going vegan, natural rule breakers are internal thinkers.
 

5 Signs You Might Be an Extroverted Thinker

ENTJs and ESTJs use extroverted thinking.
  1. You like facts and figures
You have a tendency to believe and trust people. You look to experts to give you advice and you’re happy to follow it.
  1. You can’t bear people who procrastinate
There’s no ‘doing it tomorrow when you can do it today’ for you. In fact, you don’t get the point of putting something off and you can’t understand why someone would.
  1. You’ll make a decision quickly
People can rely on you in a crisis because of your quick thinking and the fact that you are not afraid of making hard choices.
  1. You are able to vocalise your thoughts
You can easily externalise your inner thoughts to others. It’s part of how you can communicate easily and get the job done.
  1. You like rules and regulations
Following the rules allows things to run smoothly and that lets you plan and organise your world more efficiently.
Did you recognise yourself in any of the above descriptors? If you want to know more, why not see which Myers-Briggs personality type you are?
 
References:

 

 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

About the Author: Janey Davies.

Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 05:30
Terça-feira, 11 / 06 / 19

Karl Marx’s Conflict Theory and What It Reveals about Today’s Society ~ Janey Davies.

Karl Marx’s Conflict Theory and What It Reveals about Today’s Society.

By Janey Davies.

June 10th, 2019.

 
 

 



 

Brexit has caused deep divisions in households in the UK. In France, the ‘gilets jaunes’ are threatening to bring the country to a standstill over rising fuel costs. Can conflict theory help us understand why?
If you’ve noticed that the world seems to be getting a lot less tolerant these days, then conflict theory might have the answer.

What Is Conflict Theory?

Its premise is simple. Developed by Karl Marx, it suggests that society exists in a perpetual state of conflict, rather than harmony.
This is because we are all competing for the same, finite resources. In other words, for each social resource, there is a potential for conflict.
Marx stated that the wealthy in society will always protect their resources and keep them hidden away. The poor will try and obtain wealth using any means necessary.
As a result, there is a constant struggle between these two groups – the rich and the poor. Both individuals and groups within society will strive to benefit themselves over others.
Karl Marx conflict theory
Main Points of Conflict Theory:
  • Limited resources lead to competition between groups in society.
  • These groups are the rich ruling class or the poor working class.
  • The competition is usually economic or social with the ruling class dominating over the working class.
Let’s explore each of the main points in more detail.

1. Competition for resources

There are three types of resource that cause conflict:
  1. Economic resources
  2. Power resources
  3. Status resources
The most obvious resource in society is money. Wealth frees you from stress, worry, it provides you with a better life, more choices.
We all know what money can give us. Money buys you a big house. The opportunity to live in a nice area. The chance to go to a good school, to get a good education. Once you have good qualifications, you can get a better job. This perpetuates the circle of wealth.
Of course, resources don’t just include money. They are also those intangible things like time and social status. For example, a poor, working-class woman in a coercive relationship is not going to have the same opportunities as a single man with rich parents.
Therefore, it is important to understand that there are different types of struggles for resources.

2. The types of groups competing

Marx suggested two types of groups involved in the competition for resources.
  • The wealthy, the ruling class or the bourgeoisie.
  • The poor, working class or the proletariat.
The bourgeoisie account for a very small percentage of the population, but they have the power and resources. As a result, they use this power to influence and dominate the larger majority of the proletariat.
This is the pyramid theory in which a small group at the top control the power of all the other members of society below them. They achieve this in several ways. They take control of the media, they focus attention away from themselves and they will target minority groups for society’s problems.

3. Types of competition – economic and social

interpersonal conflict
So the two groups are the rich and the poor and they are competing for wealth, but they are also competing on a social level too. So what does that mean?
Take the relationship between an employer and a worker. The employer can keep wages stagnating for years, cut worker’s benefits, freeze overtime and stop pay rises. All the worker has is his or her labour to sell as a commodity. They don’t own the factory or the business. They are at the whim of the owners.
Ultimately, the owners want to get the most out of their workers with it costing them the least amount. The same applies to a tenant and a landlord. Their relationship in society is unequal. The landlord wants the most they can get for the property, no matter how nice their tenants are. Therefore there will always be conflict.

Conflict in today’s world

German sociologist Max Weber expanded on Marx’s theory. He suggested that people would be affected on many more levels, which included gender, race, education, class and social mobility. He also inferred that some might not be affected at all. Others might be influenced by the very people in power over them.
For example, if a popular leader made unpopular decisions, how would the masses react? It’s possible they would react favourably. So it’s safe to say that this theory is multi-layered and dependant on many factors, not just class and wealth.

Conflict and the Gilets Jaunes

So are we any closer to explaining the polarised views of Brexit or the protests in France? Well, yes. If the interests of an opposing group become too oppressive, then the opposed group will mobilise.
They will share a sense of belonging and social membership. They’ll create boundaries between those who belong and those don’t. Some will feel so incensed that they’ll take action.
In fact, the conflict itself tends to create a sense of solidarity and pull in others who might not ordinarily join the fight. We can see this with the gilets jaunes of France.
What began as a peaceful protest against a rise in fuel tax has now morphed into something completely different. Not only that but it has grown into a much larger anti-government movement. The protesters believe that you are either with them or against them.

Conflict and Brexit

As for Brexit, the result of the UK referendum is still a huge cause for arguments in Britain. People’s emotions are highly charged. There’s a lot of black and white thinking on this subject.
Those who voted Remain believe they are right and so do those who voted Leave. Moreover, neither will listen to opposing views. With such a small difference in the result of the Leave vote (4%), you’d think people in the UK could find some common ground.
But no. We cement our own ideologies as the truth and the way forward all the while demonising our opponents. We’ve become self-righteous and feel completely justified in our actions. What we don’t realise is that we have now become as bad as our oppressors.

How to Use Conflict Theory to Resolve Disagreements

So let’s apply the theory to human relationships and problems. What we can agree on is that the most important factor is a sense of inequality. Remember the inequality can be real or imagined, it could have happened a minute ago or be centuries old.
  • Conflict is not a contest. If you go into an argument to win at all costs, you are not going to resolve the conflict.
  • Look at the problem from the other person’s perspective. This means putting yourself in their shoes.
  • Find out the root of the inequality. Is it financial, a question of time, education, insecurity?
  • Be open-minded about resolutions and solutions. Your partner or colleague might have an idea of how to resolve the conflict.
  • Listen to the other person. When people feel listened to and validated they are more likely to open up and the level of trust increases.
  • Leave emotion out. Be matter-of-fact when discussing a possible solution. Conflict increases when emotions rise.
  • Focus on the problem, not the person. It helps to take the personality out of the equation and keep your attention on the source of the conflict.
  • Don’t criticise, respect. Nothing shuts down a conversation more than criticism. However, showing respect does the opposite.
We can’t eliminate conflict from our world. But we can change the way we deal with it. This theory shows us that understanding the reasons behind conflict will help us negotiate our waythrough it more effectively.
References:
  1. https://www.investopedia.com
  2. http://www.csun.edu
 

 

 
 
 

 

 

 

About the Author: Janey Davies.

Janey Davies has been published online for over 8 years. She is the head writer for Shoppersbase.com, she also writes for AvecAgnes.co.uk, Ewawigs.com and has contributed to inside3DP.com. She has an Honours Degree in Psychology and her passions include learning about the mind, popular science and politics. When she is relaxing she likes to walk her dog, read science fiction and listen to Muse.
 
COPYRIGHT © 2018 LEARNING MIND. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. FOR PERMISSION TO REPRINT, CONTACT US.
 
 
 



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Discernment is recommended.

 

All articles are of the respective authors and/or publishers responsibility. 

 

No religious or political belief is defended here. (Investigate yourself)

 

Individually you can be helped to find your Truth that is different of everyone. 

If you use discernment you are free to research with an open mind. 


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publicado por achama às 14:47
A Luz está a revelar a Verdade, e esta libertar-nos-á! -Só é real o AMOR Incondicional. -Quando o Amor superar o amor pelo poder, o mundo conhecerá a Paz; Jimi Hendrix. -Somos almas a ter uma experiência humana!

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Universidade de Aveiro